Chapter 20
L ouisa
An hour later, after a long hot shower that my daddies let me take all on my own, I was back in my room sitting on my bed and trying to figure it all out.
Every movement sent fresh waves of soreness through my body. My bottom throbbed from the whipping and the subsequent use, and my other intimate places ached with a deep, lingering fullness that reminded me with each shift of position what had been done to me.
I sat gingerly on the edge of the pink bed, wearing only the fresh diaper Mateo had fastened on me after my shower and the oversized t-shirt Jax had pulled over my head with something almost like tenderness.
The collar was back around my neck—a new one, identical to the one I’d destroyed.
The buckle felt cool against my skin, not letting me forget who I belonged to now.
My mind kept replaying snippets of what had happened—Jax’s belt cracking across my skin, Mateo’s cock stretching my bottom impossibly wide, Rudy’s massive hands gripping my thighs as I rode him.
A distant voice tried to whisper that I shouldn’t enjoy the memories, that I shouldn’t take the slightest bit of pride in them, but the warmth in my chest told a very different story.
Indeed, instead of horror I felt a strange calm. I felt centered. As if something inside me had finally clicked into place.
“You’re not making any sense,” I whispered to myself, running my fingers through my still-damp hair. “You need to get out of here.”
But did I? The question rose unbidden in my mind. What was waiting for me outside these walls? More drug dealing? More bad decisions? More running from the consequences of my actions?
Here, at least, I understood the rules. Behave, and earn privileges. Disobey, and face punishment. There was a clarity to it that my life had lacked for so long.
I heard the lock click, and my heart jumped as the door swung open. Jax entered, carrying something small and white in his hands. His expression was unreadable as he approached the bed.
“How are you feeling, Little Lulu?” he asked, his voice gentler than I’d expected.
“Sore,” I admitted, my cheeks heating at the memory of why.
He nodded, sitting beside me on the bed. “That’s to be expected. But it was necessary for you to understand what happens when you run away from your daddies.”
“I understand,” I whispered, surprised to find I meant it.
Jax studied my face, his gray eyes searching mine for something. Whatever he saw there seemed to satisfy him, because he smiled slightly. “I believe you do.”
He held out what he’d been carrying—the frilly white panties with the delicate white lace trim.
I felt my cheeks heat up again as I recognized them, and remembered their most important feature: the opening in the back and the button that only Daddy was allowed to touch.
“Despite your escape attempt, and indeed because of the independence and quick thinking you showed, you’ve earned these. ”
I stared at the panties, confused by the unexpected reward. “But I ran away. I… I cut my collar.”
“Yes,” Jax agreed, “and you were punished for those transgressions. But you also showed resourcefulness and intelligence with your aluminum foil shield. That deserves recognition.”
I reached out hesitantly, taking the panties from his hand. “Thank you, Daddy,” I whispered, feeling a strange flush of pride at his praise.
“You’re welcome, baby girl,” he said, his large hand coming to rest on my knee. “Before you put them on, though, I need to ask you some questions about your escape attempt.”
My stomach tightened with anxiety. “Questions?”
“Yes.” His eyes hardened slightly, his gaze so intense I had to look away. “Why did you run, Little Lulu? What was your plan?”
I swallowed hard, the panties clutched tightly in my trembling hands. “I… I was scared of what I heard. At dinner. With Oscar and Viktor.”
“Tell me exactly what you heard,” Jax pressed, his thumb rubbing small circles on my knee.
“You were talking about the conference,” I said, my voice small and shaky. “About using girls like me as… as bait for drug distributors. You said something about ‘eliminating’ competition.”
Jax’s expression remained impassive, but I thought I detected something calculating behind his eyes. “And what did you think that meant?”
I took a deep breath, my heart hammering against my ribs. “I thought you were planning to kill them. The distributors. I wanted to… to tell someone. To stop it.”
To my surprise, Jax’s face softened. He reached out, brushing a strand of damp hair from my face with unexpected gentleness.
“Little Lulu,” he said quietly, “I need to tell you something important. Something I couldn’t tell you before now.”
I looked up at him, confusion replacing my fear. “What?”
“You’ve been enrolled in the Selecta Corrections Bad Girl Program,” he said, his voice taking on an official tone I hadn’t heard before. “I’m not actually a drug boss. I’m undercover.”
I stared at him, unable to process what he was saying. “What? But… the drugs, Charlie, the dealers…”
“All part of a long-term operation,” Jax explained. “The conference isn’t about killing anyone. It’s about arresting them. We’re going to take down Oscar, Viktor, and their entire distribution network in one coordinated operation.”
My mind reeled. Jax wasn’t a criminal? This whole time, he’d been… what? A cop? An agent? “I don’t understand,” I whispered.
“I need your help,” he continued, his hands taking mine, engulfing them completely. “The conference will take place at the Velvet Crown Club. We’re not going to kill the criminals—we’re going to arrest them. But I need you to look like you’re responsible for the arrests.”
“Me?” I squeaked.
“Yes. If everything goes according to plan, you’ll be put in Selecta’s relocation program. You can have a new life wherever you want, an ordinary life,” Jax explained. “Meanwhile, I’ll keep my cover intact for future operations.”
My head spun as I tried to process this information. Jax wasn’t evil. He wasn’t planning mass murder. He was… helping me? Saving me from the consequences of my own terrible decisions?
“You’re… you’re one of the good guys?” I whispered, my voice trembling.
Jax’s lips curved into a small smile. “I wouldn’t go that far. Let’s just say I’m working for a corporation that wants to clean up this city.”
Relief washed over me in waves so powerful I felt lightheaded.
The fear that had been my constant companion since overhearing his conversation with Oscar and Viktor melted away, replaced by something else—something warm and unsettling that bloomed in my chest as I looked at this man who had punished me, used me, and apparently been trying to save me all along.
“Oh,” I breathed, the simple syllable containing a universe of realization. “Oh, Jax.”
And then, without thinking, I blurted out, “I think I love you.”
The words hung in the air between us, naked and vulnerable. I immediately wanted to take them back, to stuff them back inside where they couldn’t hurt me. What had I been thinking? This man had kidnapped me, disciplined me, shared me with his bodyguards. How could I possibly love him?
But I did. Somehow, impossibly, I did.
Jax’s steel-gray eyes warmed as he reached out to cup my cheek. “I think I love you too, Little Lulu,” he said quietly. “And I’ll do my best to look after you.”
My heart soared at his words, but then he continued, his voice taking on a more serious tone.
“But listen to me carefully,” he said. “Even though we may be in love with each other, this opportunity is much too important to let our feelings get in the way. The conference needs to go forward exactly as planned. Lives depend on it—not just yours, but many others who are suffering because of the drug trade.”
I nodded, understanding the gravity of what he was saying. “What do I need to do?”
“Just follow my lead,” Jax replied. “Be the obedient little girl we’ve trained you to be. When the time comes, I’ll give you very specific instructions.”
He released my hand and stood, his imposing height making me feel small and protected all at once. “I know you can do this, Little Lulu,” he said, his voice filled with confidence in me that I didn’t entirely feel myself.
Then, to my surprise, he sat back down and gathered me onto his lap, his strong arms wrapping around me in a tight embrace.
I melted against his broad chest, inhaling his masculine scent as he held me.
In that moment, despite everything, I felt safe.
As if nothing could harm me as long as I was in my daddy’s arms.
We sat like that for several minutes, his large hand stroking my back in soothing circles. Eventually, I gathered my courage to ask the question that had been forming in my mind since his revelation.
“What exactly will I have to do at the conference?” I asked, my voice small.
Jax’s hand paused momentarily on my back before resuming its gentle rhythm. “No matter what I do to you, or what Oscar and Viktor and even their bodyguards do to you, you have to pretend to love it.”
My eyes went wide and my heart started to pound. The implication was clear—I would be touched, used, fucked by these men I’d come to fear. Men who, unlike Jax, truly were the criminals they appeared to be.
“I’m not sure I can,” I said, my voice barely audible.
Jax’s eyes narrowed. He stood me up in front of him, between his knees, and took off my t-shirt and diaper in quick, efficient movements. I stood before him, completely naked except for my collar, as he reached for the panties I’d dropped on the bed.
“Put these on,” he instructed, his voice neutral, but with an undertone of steel.
My hands trembled slightly as I took the frilly white panties from him and stepped into them, pulling them up my legs.
The soft fabric felt strange after days in diapers, but there was something undeniably exciting about being allowed this small piece of grown-up clothing again—and even more naughtily stimulating that their little-girl appearance hid such a forbidden secret.
Once I had them in place, Jax turned me around and bent me over slightly. I felt his finger on the pearl button in the seat of the panties, pressing on it slightly. I whimpered involuntarily—I could feel myself clench, and I felt my arousal practically gush out of my vagina.
“Are you really not sure you can ‘pretend’ to like what happens to you at the conference?” Jax asked, his finger maintaining that tantalizing pressure on the button.
“Please…” I whispered, uncertain as usual what I even wanted.
“What are you asking for, Little Lulu?” Jax prompted, his finger circling the pearl button now.
I knew what he wanted to hear. What I wanted to say, despite everything. “Please undo the button, Daddy,” I whispered, my cheeks burning with shame and need.
“No,” Jax said firmly. “From this point on, I need you to be needy. I need you desperate for touch, for use, for approval. That’s what will sell this operation.”
His finger continued to play with the button, sending little jolts of sensation through me with each pass. “Do you think you can ‘pretend’ to love being used by many men at once?” he asked, his voice deepening so that it seemed to vibrate through me.
I squeezed my thighs together, trying to ease the ache building between them. “I think I can,” I whispered, my voice barely audible even to my own ears.
“Good girl,” Jax murmured, finally removing his finger from the button.
He turned me around to face him, his eyes studying mine intently.
“Now, let’s go over the timeline of the conference.
As I told you, when the moment comes I’ll give very specific instructions, but I want you to be prepared more generally for how things will work. ”
I nodded, trying to focus on his words rather than the persistent throbbing between my legs.
“Oscar and Viktor will each bring two bodyguards,” he explained. “That’s six men.”
My stomach fluttered nervously. “Six?”
“Yes.” Jax’s expression remained serious. “If I know Oscar and Viktor, they’ll keep you to themselves and not let their security teams touch you—but you should prepare yourself in case they decide they want to watch. They’ll expect to use you however they want. Some will be gentle. Others won’t.”
I swallowed hard, my throat suddenly dry. “And I have to… enjoy it?”
“You have to make them believe you enjoy it,” he corrected. “The more convincing you are, the more they’ll let their guard down. That’s when we’ll make the arrests.”
His hands moved to my shoulders, gripping them firmly. “Can you do this, Little Lulu? Can you be my good bad girl and help save lives?”
Put that way, how could I refuse? I squared my shoulders and nodded. “Yes, Daddy. I can do it.”