Chapter 20 Swear to Me
SWEAR TO ME
He let me wait for a long time, leaving me to stew with impatience as a revenge for the preceding weeks.
There was no doubt in my mind that his delay was deliberate, and I cursed his black soul as well as my own for losing my cool so easily, so helplessly.
So familiarly. Of course, I knew that for as long as there were still people other than me, those people would go on reproducing.
Oh, but how blissful it was to have had those few months of respite from my volcanic envy, when there wasn’t a single expectant mother in sight.
How complete I felt, how adequate. How pitifully unprepared I had been for being evicted from my own brand of paradise quite so soon.
To be forced to look once again into the depths of my private despair and to see the truth about myself etched in my hideous reflection.
The truth that being constantly surrounded by death was incomparably more bearable for me than being surrounded by new life.
The glass door finally opened behind me with a whoosh, and I turned around.
“Einar.”
I had to fight the urge to run towards him. The bow and the quiver bounced on my back as I reached him in swift, broad strides. I placed my hands on the bulk of his chest, leaning into him.
“Well, what’s the matter, my girl?”
His eyes gleamed with amused cruelty, and the corners of his mouth were tight with a suppressed smile. He knew exactly why I had summoned him. And he wasn’t feeling particularly generous.
“Can we go somewhere? Now?” I looked up at him imploringly, disregarding his expression. “I don’t need any more time. What I need is you. Please don’t make this hard for me.”
His mouth twitched ever so slightly, but his eyes were motionless like a shark’s. His hands hung limply at his sides, and I burned and shivered, desiring their touch.
“You need me to ... what?”
I groaned in frustration. It was so typical of him to chase and pressure me for weeks, only to reject me when I finally relented. Just to prove a point. To teach me a lesson in how powerless he could make me feel if he chose to.
“You know perfectly well what I mean!”
“Of course I do,” he assured me levelly. “What you really want, but don’t wish to say, is for me to ream that sweet, tight cunt of yours like there is no tomorrow.”
“Yes,” I forced out through my clenched teeth, heat wrapping around my neck like a shawl. “I want you to ruin me.”
“I know. What you seem to have forgotten is that I’m not here to do your bidding. That it is the other way around, and I am certainly not going to come running like a dog anytime you whistle. Did you forget who I am to you, babydoll?”
For a split second, I felt as if he had slapped me, my cheeks beginning to burn with blood rushing right underneath the surface of my skin.
But then I realised that he only ever called me ‘babydoll’ in exactly the kind of situation I wanted to be in.
My heart fluttered with ice-cold excitement. The best kind.
“No, Sir.”
Grabbing my shoulders, he spun me around, and with a hand on the small of my back, he propelled me forward.
He was leading me towards the copse of umbrella pine trees from which we had attacked the infected earlier.
Out of sight. I didn’t stop myself in time from sighing deeply in agitated relief.
I hoped the sound was lost in the prodigiously timed hooting of an owl.
“I should punish you for your insolence. But it’s been a good day, and I’m feeling generous,” Einar acceded at last when we stopped underneath the sprawling branches.
“But whatever filth you want me to do to your pussy needs to come out of your mouth first. You know you want me to corrupt you. Ask for it. In your own words.”
I took a deep breath. Once he learnt that vulgar words could be coaxed out of me under certain circumstances despite my general dislike for profanity, Einar used every opportunity to do so with a sadistic relish.
But for once, I had the answer right at the tip of my tongue.
“Sir, I need you to fuck me like the worthless trash that I am.”
The looming, shadowy figure next to me flinched in shock. But he knew better than to argue with me just then, and when he spoke again, his voice was steady and stern. Just as I liked it.
“Now ask for it very nicely. Like the good girl I know you can be.”
My blood roared with raging need, all the stronger for fear that he would make me beg very hard for its fulfilment.
“Please Sir?” I probed cautiously.
It was darker in the woodland cover, and I could no longer see Einar’s expression. I only saw his silhouette shake its head slowly, its hair lifting and shifting with the motion.
“I know you can do better than that.” His voice drifted towards me from the darkness.
I didn’t share his confidence. My mind devoid of any alluring ideas, I did the only thing I could think of.
I set my bow aside. And I knelt. And once I did, I finally understood what it was he wanted from me.
Groping in the dark, my hands found his hips, and I scuttled closer to him on my knees, my fingers already struggling with the zipper of his trousers.
Above, I heard him sigh with satisfaction at my willingness.
As I traced the tip of his erection with my tongue, the faintest hint of musk seared the inside of my nose.
I closed my eyes as I took him in my mouth tentatively, the tight ligaments in my lower face stretching.
Einar moaned, and his hands sought my head.
I stiffened in a mute protest. But he didn’t force my movements, letting me carry on at my own pace.
Instead, he only ran fingers through my hair, tantalisingly, like a ruler pardoning a disobedient servant.
Still, the size of him was like a wedge threatening to pry my jaw away from my skull.
Were it not for his sounds of intense pleasure, I would have doubted I was of much service to him since I couldn’t prevent my teeth from occasionally grazing against the intimacy of his skin.
If it hurt him, then he did not seem to mind.
Sensing that I could not carry on for much longer due to my own discomfort, I cupped his sack in an effort to hasten him, sliding the two smooth plums between my fingers in their rough pouch.
Einar moaned louder with a creeping tone of helplessness in his voice. I whimpered slightly as well, feeling as if the flesh around my chin were getting torn off, but not willing to quit. Not until I was told.
Instead, I took him in deeper and deeper until I nearly gagged as he hit the back of my throat. My eyes watered, but I refused to relent, encouraged by his sounds of pleasure.
“That’s enough, babydoll.” His hands pulled me away a bit later, just as his erection had hardened to a rock and was beginning to pulsate slightly in my mouth. “The rest is for you.”
Panting and sliding my jaw from left to right gingerly to relieve its ache, I blinked and a solitary tear rolled down my cheek.
Einar helped me up and then turned me around so that I faced a pine tree trunk, straight and branchless.
I inhaled deeply, the fresh smell of resin sharp in my nostrils.
Embracing me from behind, Einar pushed me roughly against the trunk, the wood coarse underneath my palms. Then he unzipped my trousers, pulling them down, taking them away as I stepped out of them.
He bit each of my cheeks, hard but without inflicting pain, before straightening back up.
“You know how you grabbed me on the field earlier today? Can you do that again?” I rasped and, learning from my previous mistakes, added a perfectly demure, “Please, Sir.”
I felt Einar stiffen behind me for a split second, processing what I had just said. The owl hooted again nearby, but otherwise all was quiet apart from the soft, peaceful rustling of the pine branches.
Large palms enveloped my shoulders, fingers pressing firmly into my collarbone.
“Like that?”
“Harder. Much, much harder.”
He didn’t make me beg this time. Instead, his right hand tightened into a fanged jaw on my shoulder whilst the left buried itself in my hair and pulled on it as if meaning to rip it off my scalp.
I breathed hard through my clenched teeth, feeling as if I had drunk strong mulled wine very fast, its warm intoxication accumulating in my core first and then spreading to my extremities.
Before he even entered me, quickly and forcefully, sensing my own ravenous readiness, I was already battling an irrepressible desire to weep and laugh at the same time.
Waves of pleasure rippled through me with each of his thrusts, and I moaned loudly, adjusting the centre of my gravity so that I leaned into him, pressing into his hips, not wanting to be robbed of a single fraction of an inch of his reach within.
“A bit quieter, babydoll,” he told me in the strangled voice of a man engaged in a merciless battle with his own pleasure.
I bit my lip until I tasted blood but managed to stifle the ecstatic roar that seemed to originate much deeper within me than where my vocal cords were.
“I’m so close,” I mewled, eyes squeezed shut, ecstasy coiling through my body.
“Do you want to come for me?” Einar asked hoarsely.
“Yes!”
His hand left my hair and, wrapping his arm around my hip, he reached for my clit.
“Do you want to come all over my cock and my hand?”
“God yes!”
I hummed, anticipating the bliss of additional friction. But instead of rubbing it the way I had expected, Einar pinched the bud between his fingers.
Hard.
Pain overshadowed my pleasure and destroyed my building climax. I hissed and then wailed mutinously, too frustrated to form words.
“Say you’ll never deny me again.” Voice oppressive like a descending night froze the air around me.
“What?”
Slowly and agonisingly, he slid out of me, and my legs nearly buckled.