Chapter 18 #2
For several moments, he just rubbed her back and whispered soothing words and words of love until he felt her entire body slump and relax.
Looking down at her face, he realised she had cried herself to sleep.
Adjusting her in his arms, he moved to lay her down on the sofa and covered her with a blanket kept there for this purpose.
Quietly, he stepped to the door to flag a footman and requested that a maid bring tea shortly and emphasised the need for it to be done quietly.
Taking some letters from his desk, he moved to a chair next to where Elizabeth slept and worked for several hours until she finally awoke.
She immediately noticed William sitting near her when she woke. “Please tell me the encounter with Jane was just a bad dream,” Elizabeth said huskily.
William looked at her sadly. “I wish I could, my dear,” he replied, kissing her lightly. “But remember that I love you more than life itself, and I cannot live without you.”
Sitting up slowly, she moved to return her husband’s kiss.
“And I love you too, Will. I have lost so much in the last few months, but having you in my life is so much more than what I have lost. Soon, we will have a child to love and hold as well, and, Will, we will not have a favourite child—neither one of us,” Elizabeth finished in a heated tone.
“Nor will we compare one child to another, belittling one while advancing another.”
“No, we will love all of our children the same, dearest,” he replied earnestly, kissing her forehead.
“We will encourage them as often as possible and scold them as necessary, but do our best to raise them to be good, kind, loyal, and honourable adults.” Elizabeth stood from the couch and sat across William’s lap, hugging him tightly.
Glancing at the clock, Elizabeth was taken aback at the time. “We have missed luncheon, William. What will your family think of us?”
“They will think nothing of it,” William said. “I sent word to both of our aunts earlier that you needed some extra rest today. They understood. I also notified Aunt Gardiner about your confrontation with your sister.”
“What do we do now?” she asked.
He rubbed her back as he considered her question. “I am not certain, Elizabeth. Can you see yourself ever reconciling yourself with Jane?”
She sighed. “She has hurt me deeply, Will,” she replied. “I do not know if I will be able to. At least not any time soon.” She felt William nod his head above her.
“I believe Charles understands,” he said. “We heard nearly every word Jane said, although your replies were quieter,” he told her.
“We spoke about my feelings for you and how they had changed, even before I left for Derbyshire. I told her then that I no longer thought so ill of you, that your letter opened my eyes to your good character and revealed my flaws. Yet, she said she believed me guilty of what Miss Bingley attempted. She chose to listen to Caroline Bingley, who had treated her abhorrently over me, her sister! Not once has she ever listened to my version of events but has chosen to believe me guilty of entrapping you in a marriage just so I could have a higher status than her,” Elizabeth shot out.
“Why? How can she truly believe this of me? How could she have been this false for so long? I cannot understand her.”
“She felt she was entitled to marry better than you because your mother told her how much more deserving she was,” William told her.
“As for her falseness, I cannot understand that either. You have always cared for her extremely well; I remember how dedicated you were in caring for her last year at Netherfield. And, of course, how vehemently you fought on her behalf at Rosings.”
“I struggle to believe that for all those years, she truly felt she was so much better than me. It should not be such a surprise, I guess, since Mrs. Bennet always told her she was so much more beautiful, so much more accomplished, just so much better than her other daughters, but it never occurred to me that Jane believed any of it,” Elizabeth cried. “More fool me.”
William caressed her and attempted to soothe her once again. He felt the shudders wracking her body as she tried to calm herself and felt anger at both Jane Bingley and Caroline Bingley growing.
After some time, they were both calmer, and William suggested they drink some tea and cakes the staff had provided earlier. He had placed the kettle by the fireplace when it had been delivered to keep it warm and went to fetch it when she nodded her agreement.
As they ate, William shared with her some of her correspondence, and the two discussed much of it.
William and Elizabeth had determined early in their marriage to be partners, and as such, they discussed nearly everything going on at the estate.
Eventually, they were both sufficiently composed and comforted to leave the study.
However, they headed to their rooms to change and refresh themselves before joining the company gathered in a drawing room.
Elizabeth spoke to her Aunt Gardiner before dinner and shared much about her argument with Jane. Talking it over with her favourite aunt calmed Elizabeth further, enabling her to focus on being a good hostess for their last meal together.
All parties departed the following day to head south.
As he had said he would, Bingley left several hours ahead of the rest of the party to return to Netherfield.
Reluctantly, the three Darcys were going to spend a month or two in town before the height of the season and planned to return to Pemberley sometime in March to prepare for Elizabeth’s confinement.
Georgiana, with input from Elizabeth and her aunt, had decided to delay her coming out until the following year when she would be 18.
This year, she would be permitted to attend a few private parties and musicals, as well as the theatre, for the time the Darcys were in town.
Lady Matlock invited Georgiana to stay with them in London through early June, when they would all travel to Pemberley, as that lady was the self-appointed grandmama to the Darcy babies, something she was very much looking forward to.
After attending a gala Twelfth Night ball, where the new Mrs. Darcy was well received, especially as she had the backing of Lady Matlock and several of her influential friends, much of January was spent shopping for clothes for the season, as well as clothes that would be comfortable during Elizabeth’s confinement.
While Elizabeth and Georgiana were out shopping, Darcy was spending his days conducting business, often with Mr. Gardiner or Lord Matlock, and met Bingley at his club once or twice a week once he had arrived in town in late January.
Charles had stopped the letters from his sister and, once they moved to town, stopped the letters from Mrs. Bennet and Lydia.
Because of this, Jane was somewhat isolated, and although she visited with Mrs. Gardiner occasionally, she struggled to find friends in London.
Bingley was not particularly sympathetic to his wife either at this moment, and the overheard confrontation with her sister had led to the distance between the couple.
Bingley had written to William of his discussion with his wife, explaining that he had attempted to tell her what had happened at Pemberley in July.
Still, Jane adamantly held to what Caroline had told her and refused to believe him.
He also informed William that Jane was also pregnant—apparently, a honeymoon baby, as it was due sometime in the summer as well.
One day in late January, returning home from shopping, Elizabeth was surprised to find a small packet of letters in Mary’s hand. They were numbered, so Elizabeth opened the first one and read.
Dear Elizabeth,
Our father has prevented me from sending you letters, but I have begun to write short letters to you and hope that someday soon, I will have the opportunity to send them to you.
This morning, Papa was taking Mama and Lydia to the post station nearer to London for their trip to Ireland, since the Phillips are no longer able to take them, I was able to sneak away and send my packet.
I do hope you do not mind paying for postage on such a large letter.
Mama and Lydia left today, and I am, quite frankly, glad to see them go.
Jane and Mr. Bingley have gone to London, and since only Mama was permitted to visit them at Netherfield, I have not seen them since they married.
With you and Jane both gone and now Mama and Lydia, I do not know what we shall do.
I would dearly love to come to London with you, but I am uncertain if that would be possible or if Papa would even allow it.
Up until the moment they left, Mama and Lydia had nothing good to say about you or your marriage.
They still blamed you and your husband for Lydia’s situation—never placing any blame on Lydia or Mr. Wickham for their own actions.
I have never believed any of their stories, as I have never known you to act in the way they described.
Additionally, it was Lydia who is with child and unmarried, not you, so I do not understand why any of it could possibly be your fault.
Fortunately, they have been prevented from spreading any of these rumours, since Papa has allowed almost no visitors due to Lydia’s condition, and Mama has only been allowed to visit Netherfield on a few occasions.
This is all to perpetuate the rumour that Lydia or perhaps Mama are ill, so when they go to Ireland, no one would be surprised at the story of them going away for their health.
I have also written to the Gardiners to ask if Kitty and I can go there for a visit. I think Papa might agree to that suggestion more willingly, and from there, I hope we can visit with you. I do hope you are in London right now.
Love, Your Sister,
Mary Bennet
Elizabeth cried when she read the letter. When William found her in the drawing room with tears in her eyes, his lips quirked up slightly as he frequently found his wife in tears these days. He approached her and kissed her cheek before sitting next to her.
“What is this?” he asked, picking up the letter beside her.
“Mary was able to sneak out some letters to me. She says Mrs. Bennet and Lydia are on their way to Ireland, and she is desperate to get away from Longbourn and hopes to join us in town,” Elizabeth explained.
“She will write to Aunt Gardiner to see if they will help get her and Kitty to town so they might visit with us for a time.”
“They would be welcome, and it may benefit them both to have some distance from Longbourn, even with Mrs. Bennet and Miss Lydia gone. Or perhaps more so now,” William agreed.
“How do we get them to London, and what can we do if Papa, I mean, Mr. Bennet, will not agree to let them come?” she asked. “Aunt Gardiner was to come to tea tomorrow; perhaps we might send a note inviting them to dinner instead. Mary sent a note to our aunt as well.”
William agreed, and a note was sent to Gracechurch Street to invite the Gardiners the following evening.
After briefly discussing what they had each been doing that morning, William escorted Elizabeth upstairs for her afternoon nap.
He stayed with her to help her relax before falling asleep.
Since there were no plans for that night, the two decided to share their dinner in their rooms and spent the evening in each other’s sole company, as Georgiana was to stay with Lady Matlock that night after attending a musical with them.
Sometime in the early hours, when William had woken up Elizabeth again, and they were again sated and exhausted, she felt that tiny flutter in her stomach that both of their aunts had told her about. She stilled suddenly and sat up, waiting for it to happen again.
“What is wrong, Elizabeth?” he asked, worry lacing his voice.
She felt the flutters again. “Oh, William! I felt him; I felt the baby move.”
He looked at her in awe. “Are you certain, dearest?”
“Yes, Papa, I am certain,” she said happily.
His grin spread from cheek to cheek. Sliding down her body, he kissed her stomach and then spoke to it.
“Well, hello, little one. You are not even born yet, and you are already intruding upon your Mama and Papa’s private time, but we look forward to meeting you in a few months.
” He looked up and into Elizabeth’s eyes as he continued to speak.
“I hope you are a precocious little girl with dark hair and green eyes that match your Mama’s.
I also hope you are just as beautiful and mischievous as your Mama.
” He kissed her belly again before moving back up to claim his wife’s lips.
“I love you so much, my dearest Elizabeth. I am anxious to meet this little one or at least be able to feel him or her for myself.”
“Soon, Will,” she said. “You will be able to feel him move soon enough, and before you know it, he will be in your arms. And I want you to know I am hoping for a precious little boy who looks like his Papa with his black hair and clear blue eyes. If we do not have him this time, we will pray for him next time.”
“One child at a time, dearest,” he said dryly.
“It could always be twins, William,” she suggested, then laughed at his wide-eyed look of terror.