20. Chapter 20
Chapter 20
BERNIE
S tuffing my phone into my sweatpants pocket, I bounded quietly down the carpeted stairs that spit me out into the dining room. Orange, hardwood floors, scratched from years of wear before my mom bought the house slid beneath my socks as I padded around the table and crossed between the kitchen island and cabinets along the wall. A large window at the end of the room let in bright light from the late morning sun. The rays glinted off of the newly updated granite countertops that were a little too white in my opinion for the still outdated design of the rest of the house.
“Where’s Mom?” I asked, opening the fridge and grabbing some milk.
Raiden leaned his head backward against the green couch facing the television as another set of footsteps crashed into the kitchen.
“Late for work,” our mom frantically said.
“And why is he not at school? It’s Tuesday, isn’t it?” I asked her, plopping the gallon down on the kitchen island and glancing to my left to get a better look at my brother. The worn, mahogany carpet in the family room needed a good vacuum as Matrix wagged his tail and jumped up onto the couch beside Raiden. Muffin’s barely audible paws bumped down the stairs, disappearing into the half bathroom near the front door.
“It’s a holiday. Teacher prep day or something,” he answered as Mom snatched an orange from the fruit basket on the kitchen island.
“So, if it’s a holiday, why as a teenager are you up so fucking early?”
He rolled his eyes, running a hand over his dog who panted as he laid down in Raiden’s lap. “It’s like ten in the morning, dumbass. You’re the one that slept in.”
“I wasn’t asleep.” I pushed off the counter and turned around, rifling through the cupboards to find where Mom stored the cereal boxes since they were no longer above the fridge.
“Second to the left. Near the sink beneath the big window,” our mom directed in a frenzy to leave.
Raiden’s eyes widened as she sprinted toward the door. “Prom,” he mouthed silently, nodding toward her.
“When’s prom?” I asked, out loud and Raiden groaned, plopping his head back against the couch, clearly not happy with my approach.
“This Saturday,” he replied through gritted teeth.
“Mom, can Raiden go to prom?” I glanced back at her.
She jumped on one foot, tugging a shoe on. “Not the time to ask, Bernie.”
“Come on, it’s his first prom, and he’s got his girlfriend. Plus, Raiden has straight A’s and is a hard worker. The total opposite of me,” I continued .
She slammed her hand around the doorknob, ripping it open. “You know what, he can go if you agree to chaperone.”
My jaw fell open as, without another word, she whisked out of the house. The pictures on the walls rattled as the door shut with a clang.
“You’re chaperoning,” Raiden stated, raising a brow at me as I braced against the counter.
“You don’t get to demand another thing from me.” I tugged open the golden handle and scanned the assortment of cereal boxes.
“Then you should’ve asked at a different time, and in a better way. You’re going. And you better fix this pissed-off attitude you’ve had since you came home yesterday.” He narrowed his eyes on me.
“I had shit to do. Got myself a project and was chatting with Griff about some of it.”
“Griffin?” Raiden grinned and rolled around on the couch to face me while kneeling on the cushions. “How is he? Why hasn’t he and Jane come and visited since we live so close now? Better yet, why hasn’t Ford shown up like he always does when y’all are on leave?”
I shrugged my shoulders, selecting my favorite marshmallow cereal. “Ford said he was going to visit some old military buddies on the coast for a bit, and Griff has like four fucking kids. Probably pretty hard to pack all of them little shits up.”
“True…” Raiden sighed and plopped back down on the couch. “I’m waiting for Charlotte, by the way, to answer your other question. So, think of the fact you’ll be letting not just me, but her down if you don’t agree to chaperone. ”
I chuckled to myself, and plodded back to the island, snagging a clean bowl from the dish drying rack beside the stainless-steel sink. “Fine, fine.”
“Thank you!” Raiden exclaimed and turned to Matrix, grabbing his ears. “You hear that buddy?” he said to the dog in a baby voice. “I’m going to prom.”
“You’ve already asked Charlotte, haven’t you,” I inserted, as a statement instead of a question, and Raiden huffed.
“And? You aren’t gonna tell mom I did that before getting permission to go, are you?” he replied as the cereal tinked into the ceramic white bowl.
“Nah, just once in a while, you do shit that I would, and that’s one of them,” I replied with a grin, twisting the cap off of the milk.
“Oh, ha ha. Despite how hard I try, somehow I can’t shake being related to you entirely,” Raiden quipped quickly back as I dribbled some delicious milk into the bowl.
As I turned to replace the milk in the fridge, a light pounding rattled the front door. Without a second’s pause, Raiden shot up from the couch and darted across the carpet. He smoothed down some of his hair and adjusted the simple navy T-shirt he wore.
I leaned back against the counter beside the fridge and raised the bowl, the cold piercing my skin as I dug into the cereal with my spoon. The teenager double checked there wasn’t a piece of lint or a strand of hair out of place, then paused before opening the door.
He tossed a sharp glare right at me. “You could’ve at least put a shirt on,” he hissed and wrapped his hand around the doorknob.
The hinges groaned as I shoveled some cereal in my mouth, and the figure that filled the open frame froze me mid-chew. A sense of peace wrapped my soul, the burden of grief lessening just a little as my gaze locked with my best friend’s. Not because the grief was less, but because it was at least shared now.
Raiden shrieked, losing the mature insecurity of a teenager and literally launching himself at the massive frame. He wrapped his legs around Ford’s waist as the man dropped his two duffels and caught the kid.
“What’s up, buddy?” Ford grunted, wrapping his arms around Raiden’s back.
“Where have you been? I’ve had to deal with Bernie by myself for over a month now!” Raiden cried out as I set my bowl down beside me and shoved off the counter.
“I’m not that bad, jeez,” I grumbled.
Raiden jumped out of Ford’s hold and looked directly at me with pursed lips.
Ford cackled, stooping to snatch his duffels up. “It’s you, dumbass.” He shrugged the straps of his rucksack tighter onto his shoulders and stepped inside the house with a loud plunk. His eyes scanned the surroundings as Raiden closed the door behind him. The moment he’d finished taking in the new house, he plopped his luggage off to the side, slid the backpack from his arms, and adjusted his green T-shirt.
Stalking across the floor, I met Ford, and he clamped his arms around me. Not a word passed between us for a moment, as Raiden’s voice filled the muted space but not with words I cared to listen to.
Then in sync, we clapped each other’s backs and stepped away. “How were the waves?” I asked.
He shrugged. “Not the best, but seeing old friends was nice. ”
“So, how long are you staying?”
“How long are you gonna ask me that damn question?”
“Until the fucking answer changes.” I grinned and trudged around the counter back to my cereal.
Ford shook his head. “Until we deploy again. Like usual.”
“Let me rephrase, when are you going to go see your family?” I picked up my bowl and took a casual bite as Ford leaned his elbows against the kitchen island across from me.
“It’s been fourteen years, Bernie, and my answer still hasn’t changed,” he grumbled, his Cajun accent slipping through the words for the first time in forever.
“That’s a long time to hold a grudge.”
“No grudge.”
“Oh, right. Just some multi-generational family rivalry or some shit.”
He rolled his eyes and waved his hand in dismissal. “Where’s Mama and her damn cookies?”
“You don’t get to call her that,” I replied with a wink, ignoring the fact that he so quickly changed the subject from something he almost never spoke about, and the little he did, left much to be imagined.
“Not what she said last time I had her bent over the kitchen counter.” He grinned.
“Can we not start with your mama jokes?” Raiden muttered, narrowing his gaze, and reminding me he was still here.
“Oh, shit. Sorry.” Ford chuckled and inhaled deeply. “Really though, I want some cookies, please tell me she made some.” He wandered around the island over to the red Tupperware sitting next to the bowl of fruit. With a pop, he lifted the lid and dug into the desserts.
“You’ll be here until you guys get orders again, right?” Raiden asked as Ford stuffed a bit of cookie in his mouth. We both nodded as he hoisted himself up onto the counter with a grunt. The light from the window snapped across his eyes, highlighting the heterochromia that I often forgot he had. One hazel eye while the other one was brown, his gaze shot to mine with a raised brow.
“Where the fuck is your shirt?” he asked, crumbs spewing from his lips.
“That’s what I asked!” Raiden threw his hands in the air as I shoved another spoonful of cereal into my mouth.
“I was busy this morning,” I muttered through the food.
“It takes like five seconds to put a shirt on.” Ford ripped some more cookie between his teeth.
“When Griffin has time to talk on the fucking phone, you chat.”
“Griffin? The fuck were you talking to him for?”
“I—”
“You know what,” Ford quickly inserted, stopping me, and narrowed his eyes. Every deep-set line on his face darkened. “Let me ask a better question. What shit are you wound up in?”
My mouth fell open, a few marshmallows plunked off the side of the spoon and back into the bowl. “Why the fuck is that your assumption?”
Raiden chuckled. “Again, because it’s you.”
I rolled my eyes as Ford gestured with a cookie at my little brother. He brushed a hand over some crumbs that had plopped onto his black cargo pants. “Exactly. ”
Saving me from an answer, Matrix jumped down from the couch and plodded over to Raiden with a clack of his nails against the hardwood. Ford’s eyes widened as he raised his backwards baseball cap and slid some fingers through his wavy hair. A soft smile slid across his face as the dog brushed against my brother’s legs and then found his way over to Ford.
With his wriggling body full of excitement, Matrix’s tongue lolled from the side of his mouth as he stopped in front of the big man. “Hi there,” Ford said, his voice raising in pitch, and he leaned down, scratching the dog behind his ears. “Now, who are you?”
“That’s my new dog! His name is Matrix,” Raiden replied, leaning against the kitchen island and crossing his arms.
The grin immediately wiped off Ford’s face, and his gaze snapped to mine. Pulling my lips into a thin line, I offered him a quick, single nod. It hurt less, hearing that word. Hearing Raiden call to his dog no longer sliced a sharp sword through my heart. But the burning haze of remembering I’d never hear Duncan laugh or see him smile had yet to fade.
Ford raised slowly from the black-and-white dog, his square jaw knotting as he hesitantly pulled a wide-eyed stare back to Raiden. It seemed neither of us had been able to let go of things just yet, and that acceptance I’d thought I’d been experiencing in this strange journey of grief rumbled away as quickly as a gunshot.
“Matrix,” Ford muttered and shoved his hands in his pockets.
The cookies long gone, he chewed on nothing as he stared at the dog still wagging its tail by his feet. Raiden’s brows pulled together as he glanced between Ford and me, recognizing the same reaction I’d had. Yet, I’d never had the heart or energy to explain. I doubted I ever would .
A soft plunk sounded next to me on the counter, and a familiar brush of skin rubbed against my back. Ford’s eyes immediately lifted from Matrix as Muffin shoved herself beneath my elbow and stood on the edge of the counter.
Her bright green eyes darted up to mine as her tail slowly flicked back and forth. I set the mostly empty bowl off to the other side of me and lifted Muffin into my hands. Cradling her against me, I slowly slid my fingers down her back as she stretched out and quietly chattered.
“Needy,” I chastised and clicked my tongue. “I held you for like a fucking hour already.”
She stretched out and simply ignored my comment, settling in my arms.
“The fuck is that thing?” Ford blurted out.
“She is not a thing.” I shot a glare at him and pursed my lips. “Her name is Muffin, and she’s my cat.”
His jaw snapped open. “I’m sorry. Yours? When the hell did you get a cat?”
“Same time Raiden got Matrix,” I replied.
“And you named her Muffin?”
“She was already named that, and it fits her.”
“A cat who clearly gave you those scratches on your stomach fits the name Muffin? Why are you cuddling her right now knowing she might do that again?” His voice squeaked as he stared at the cat.
“Are you scared of her?” I continued to slide my fingers down her back.
“No.”
“Well, I have figured out that if she demands cuddles, you give them to her or you will get attacked. But then also if she is done with the snuggles you better let her go or she will do the same thing. And she only gives one warning before bringing out the claws. I call it the ‘slap chop’ ’cause first, it’s soft, then we get the danger knives from her,” I answered.
He shook his head. “That sounds semi-abusive, you know that?”
I nodded vigorously. “Yep. Pretty much.”
Ford slowly grinned and then let a deep chuckle ripple through his lips. “I don’t even know what to do with that kind of information.”
“Just accept it. I have.”
“Bernie also made Muffin her very own Kevlar so she can join you guys on your shit,” Raiden inserted.
Ford cackled even louder. “Of course he did. Tell me, it’s pink, isn’t it?”
“Damn fucking straight it is,” I replied.
“I expected nothing less.” Ford brushed at some dog hair that caught on his pants as Matrix wandered back to the couch and jumped up. Raiden followed after him, climbing onto the cushions and giving his pet some good scratches.
“So, can you do a crawfish boil or make some jambalaya or gumbo tomorrow or something?” Raiden asked.
Ford breathed out heavily and leaned back against the cupboards, shooting a sideways glance at me before returning to my brother. “Did your mom bring most of the seasonings with her during the move?”
Raiden nodded .
“I guess I can find my way to the grocery store and see what they got. Might end up more like a seafood boil, but sure,” Ford replied, his Cajun accent thickening with each passing word.
I chuckled, and wiggled my brows at Ford, mockingly. “Ba-wl,” I repeated, pronouncing the word “boil” like he had.
“Fuck you, man.” Ford lifted both hands and flipped me off.
“Say water,” I taunted.
He narrowed his eyes. “Fuuuuuck you.”
Another knock at the door had Raiden shooting off the couch and ending our conversation. Muffin suddenly whacked me with her paw, and I immediately opened my arms. She hopped out of my hold and wandered across the counter toward Ford as Raiden slid to a stop in front of the door.
“What’s his deal?” Ford mouthed at me.
“Girlfriend,” I silently replied.
He raised a single brow and then smirked, looking back at Raiden as the kid pulled open the door again.