27. Chapter 27
Chapter 27
BERNIE
I kicked my door shut behind me, and the frame rattled with a bang. Her tongue down my throat, my hand up her shirt, I shoved my body back against hers. My skin was as sticky as hers. I kneaded her breast in my palm, wrapped up in the feel of her fingers digging into my waist. Every inch of her figure waited for me to devour her as I shoved her against the edge of the bed.
She crashed backwards. The frame groaned as I fell on top of her. Using my thigh between her legs, I pushed her up onto the mattress while tipping away and ripping my shirt off over my head.
I would never get enough of her. Could never get enough. This would never get old, and the longing I had for her in more ways than just the simplicity of sex roared hot within me. There was more to this relationship with her than the physical divinity she was. But I certainly was not going to diminish just how incredible fucking her was in light of my desire for that deeper connection .
Her hands slid down my body, trailing across each divot and scar that I’d long since forgotten where they’d come from. Ramming my lips back against her mouth, she moaned into my kiss and bucked her hips against me.
I rocked myself back and forth, rubbing myself against her as she hooked her legs around my waist. There was nothing holding me back. Nothing kept me from indulging in everything that I wanted as I tossed her hat to the side and threaded my fingers into her hair. Gripping hard at the base of her neck, I tugged. With more of her neck exposed, I slid my tongue down her skin.
More.
I wanted more. Needed more.
Finding the hem of her tank top, I pulled, and soft pops frayed from the force. The seams to her shirt ripped apart.
Pausing, I glanced down at the now torn fabric and back up to Kat’s eyes. She blinked rapidly a few times and then giggled. “Well, guess you owe me a new shirt.”
Remaining still for another moment, I stared at her and then ripped it completely from her body. I raised a brow, taking note of her matching lingerie, as I slid my hands down each side of her curvy frame. “Am I that predictable?” I asked hungrily at the sight of her opaque, white lacy bra.
Her fingers found mine and slid one hand back up her body. “Maybe I’m just that needy,” she whispered.
And I slammed my lips back against hers .
Her entire body flush with mine. Every curve, every absolutely delectable inch waited at my fingertips. The only thing adding distance were our pants, and that was too much.
Too far. She was too far away from me. Fumbling for her waistline, every awakened bone in my body lapped up the quiet gasps of each breath she took.
I rocked against her again, aching for some release as another moan escaped her mouth. “Please,” she begged. Her fingers tightened into my triceps.
“Beg harder,” I growled, stilling my hips.
With each pant, she bucked toward me, but I pulled myself far enough away she couldn’t quite reach. “Bernie, please. I need this. I need you. Please.”
Fuck.
And I shoved my hips against her again.
A sharp whimper fled from her lungs. I knew what was coming. I’d memorized the little sounds she’d made before each peak of exhilarating release. It had quickly become my most favorite sound and something I craved above all else.
And a screech of an alarm shot through the rush of pleasure.
Kat stopped moving, and her eyes focused back on mine. Blinking the euphoria from her gaze, her brows knitted in confusion.
Breathing hard, I stared back at her, holding still. “What the fuck is that?” I asked.
She fluttered her lashes, her gaze remaining locked on mine, and then her eyes suddenly widened. “Oh no. What time is it? ”
As she shoved her palms against my torso, I sat back on my heels. Her hand dug into the back pocket of her jeans, pulling out her cell phone I’d accidentally smacked on the way up to the bedroom.
“Shit!” She slammed a hand over her mouth and shut off the absolutely annoying sound. “Bernie, I completely forgot.”
“Forgot what?” I muttered, attempting to swirl thoughts of anything other than my half-naked girlfriend whose tits were right in front of me, waiting to be loosed from the bra that nearly undid me.
Did I just call her my girlfriend…?
“My birth control. I normally carry it with me when I know I’m going to be out of the house at this time, but I was so wrapped up in everything else, I forgot this time.” Her gaze darted away from the phone and met mine.
“We didn’t actually make it to the dick in vagina part, though? In fact, I thought we weren’t going to at all right now?” I questioned, placing my palms against my thighs.
“But we did last night. And sperm is good for like five days or something inside you,” she replied.
My eyes widened as what she was saying hit me. “Where’s your pills?” I asked, quickly sliding off the bed and snatching up my shirt from the floor. Instead of putting it on, however, I tossed it at her and rushed over to my closet.
“My house on my nightstand.” She tugged my T-shirt over her head as I ripped down the first one I saw from the hanger.
“And is it possible to get pregnant by missing one pill?” I asked, shoving my arms through the sleeves .
“It’s low, but yes. And I think there’s even more of a chance if it’s just the progesterone ones, which is the kind I take.”
“We’re fucking using a condom next time. I’m not about to knock you up till things are more sorted out.” Digging to the side of my closet, I grabbed my motorcycle helmet and the extra one I had for Raiden. “I have kinks, but that’s not one of them. No shame to the game, just not for me.”
“Well, good because I don’t want to be pregnant right now anyway.” She jumped off the bed as I kicked the closet door shut behind me.
“Here, it’s Raiden’s but should work for you.” I raced over to her and shoved the helmet against her stomach.
Her brows raised as a grin lit up on her face. “You have a bike?”
I nodded. “Yes. Now, let’s go.”
As I hoisted her up onto my back, she hooked her legs over my hips, encircled my neck with her arms, and held the helmet within her fingers against my chest.
Slipping out of my room, I took whispering steps of silent death down the hall. The closer I carried Kat piggy-back style to the front door, the more relaxed I became. Nobody was inside but us, not another soul paid attention to two adults disappearing outside.
And within a matter of minutes, I twisted the handlebar of my motorcycle and raced out of the driveway.
Her fingertips dug into my stomach. With her arms wrapped tightly around my waist and her chest pressed against my back, there was nothing more peaceful. There was nothing more perfect as the rumble of the sport bike’s engine beneath me melted away the chaos that thrived in my mind .
Lately, the monsters had been absent more often than usual. Finally, there seemed some gleam of light in the haze that clouded rational thought. And it usually took the form of Kat’s beautiful face. Or the sound of her voice. Other times, it was the mere idea that somehow, I’d been afforded the gift of someone so incredible and gentle, yet feisty and confident.
Maybe this was Duncan’s doing.
Inhaling deeply, I leaned with the bike, rounding a corner. Even in whatever afterlife was afforded to men like me, Duncan still seemed to be making my world better. Taking a mental note to call his mom and check on her, I straightened the bike and moved my hand to Kat’s. Threading my fingers into hers, I allowed myself to smile.
What beauty painted around me. Tall pine trees, dusting the orange canvas stretching above me. With the sun sinking, setting the night on fire, everything seemed like a slice of heaven. I may not end up there when I die, but I’d take it right now.
Sliding my hand from hers, I reached back and brushed my palm against her thigh. How in the hell was this my life? For a brief split in the fabric of time, the threads weren’t painted red with blood. They were a gentle shade of yellow, like the sunflowers in Kat’s room.
Because she was my yellow. The brightness that gave me hope for tomorrow.
Weaving along the road, hardly another vehicle in sight, I chuckled to myself. Once upon a lifetime ago, I’d never imagined myself in a small town like this. Now, I couldn’t really picture myself anywhere else. There was more drama and chaos here despite it not being a big city, but also, it lived at a pace I one day aspired to match. Slower. Consistent .
And Kat.
Kat was here.
A bubbling of uncertainty rolled briefly through me. A casual, fleeting wondering when she’d ultimately leave as everyone did. But as quickly as it came, a finality that she wouldn’t settled into that pocket of fear.
Fear.
I wasn’t afraid of much, or at least I pretended to not be. But I was afraid of losing her. She was unexpected, and everything I could’ve ever asked for. And she wasn’t entirely mine. Not yet. In spoken secret, she was. But to the world, she was still Wyatt’s.
One side of me wanted to apply six pounds of pressure with seven pounds of lead and simply take care of the issue. But the rational, moral side of me told me that would do me no good.
No. I wasn’t going to cheapen this. I was going to do right by Kat, until the end of my days. As Griffin did for Jane. As Mikey did for Scottie. As they both continued to do.
Shaking the intrusive demons from my mind, the kind that made my stomach churn, I eased the black bike off the road and slowed. The tires crunched over the gravel as I drove us up Kat’s driveway. The ranch stretched around me, a sight that had only once existed in fiction. This was her life, her world, and I was merely a visitor asking for extended stay.
Someday, I’d earn my permanence here, but for now, I was a guest.
Parking off to the side beside a group of pine trees, I killed the engine. With the gentle breeze rushing back into my ears without the rumble of the engine, I pushed the kickstand down and Kat slid off the bike behind me .
Her hair fell in such an awkward, messy wave out of the helmet. Biting back the smile, I took a moment to study the exquisite woman. What a lucky man I was, and as my gaze slid down her body, my smile widened.
“I like you like that,” I said, pulling my own helmet from my head and dismounting.
She placed the helmet on the seat, behind mine. “Like what?”
“Messy.” I smiled at her, reaching for her hand. “And wearing my shirt.”
Fingers threaded into mine. “Me too.” Her tender gaze met mine as we quietly trudged up to her front door. Turning the knob, she pulled it open, and silence met my ears. How strange to not hear the faint drum of conversation, or shouting from two young boys who were most likely occupied by Ford at the moment. It shocked me a little that I’d expected it upon entering, despite the fact that I’d only been here a few times.
Following her up the stairs, I carefully avoided the step that creaked. I stepped over a wayward sock missing its companion, and around two plastic swords. A homemade PVC pipe marshmallow gun was pulled apart into two pieces in another corner, and a few tractors were tipped on their side halfway down the hallway.
“Stay,” Kat whispered, pulling my attention away from the evidence of two younger brothers.
“What?” I asked.
She paused in front of her bedroom door. “Nobody is home right now. So let’s watch a movie or something.”
“Like an actual date date?” I raised a brow, feeling that too often occurring smile tugging at my lips again .
She nodded, grinning. “I’ll make some popcorn, after taking my pill obviously, and then we can snuggle on my bed and watch something on my laptop.”
“I’d like that,” I said and then pulled her toward me. Glancing down at her eyes, I quickly pressed my lips against her forehead. “I’ll text Ford to have him distract your parents while you tell Emma to sneak out. Then have her message them or something a little later saying she took you home because you weren’t feeling well.”
Closing her eyes, she snorted. “You came up with that excuse mighty fast, Bottle Cap.”
“Any reason to spend some alone time with my girl, I’ll think of something without hesitation.”
“Even for just a movie?” she asked. Her eyelashes fluttered open, and that piercing ocean gaze met mine again.
“Yes. Even for just a movie. I will never deny the fact I really like having sex with you, but I don’t have to have it to enjoy your company,” I explained.
She grinned again and turned around.
And, despite her saying only a movie and cuddling, an hour later she was riding me of her own choice.
I hadn’t asked. Hadn’t pressured her. Hadn’t even touched her in any sexual way. I’d simply snuggled her. But I also hadn’t protested when she’d stripped off her clothes and unbuckled my pants.
I dug my fingers into her hips, consumed by all that was her.