Chapter 35
PIA
“Christmas,” I whisper into her hair. With my eyes closed like this and Cassie in my arms, I can pretend there isn’t a car waiting for me in the driveway outside. I can pretend we’re not hidden behind her front door, hugging for the last time in weeks.
“Christmas,” she repeats. Her arms are tight around my waist.
“I’ll make what your mum would make you: roast dinner with Yorkshire puddings and gravy and Brussels sprouts. And what were the other things?”
“Pigs in blankets,” she says.
“Yes, them. I’ll make it all for you.”
“I won’t need to rest then,” Cassie says with a soft laugh. “I can cook too.”
“But I like it,” I say, still unable to look at her. “I like cooking for you.”
“Pia,” she says, and my stomach drops when she pushes against my hold. I let her pull back. I let her see me. “Thank you for everything, this last week.”
“No, Cassie, don’t do that.” I shake my head and use that as an excuse not to look into her eyes. “I didn’t do anything I didn’t want to.”
“I know,” she says with a smile in her voice. “You never do anything you don’t want to do.”
I look at her then, and I see everything I have ever wanted and feared.
She sees me. She knows me.
And I have never been more terrified.