18. Layken
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
LAYKEN
W hen I brought my body pillow into Griffin’s room last night for him to use so he could comfortably sleep on one side, I didn’t consider the fact he would deposit it on the floor and simply wrap himself around me instead.
But here we are.
I’m the human body pillow.
Griffin’s head rests on my chest, his body encapsulating mine, our legs intertwined as he sleeps peacefully. I drag my fingers lazily through his hair as the events of last night’s game play over and over again in my mind.
Trying to keep track of the puck.
Celebrating Ledger’s score.
Watching the action was so much fun.
Until it wasn’t.
Seeing Griffin checked into the wall wasn’t like anything I hadn’t seen before. He gets checked all the time. That’s hockey. But the speed and force with which he was hit last night frightened the hell out of me.
Watching him fall lifeless to the ice scared the shit out of me even more.
Was he breathing?
Did he break his neck?
His arm?
His leg?
Was he bleeding?
Would he be able to get up?
And then when Darius rolled him over and he screamed, I swear the entire arena heard it.
Seeing him in so much pain was heart breaking.
Waiting for him outside the locker room after the game was hard because I knew he was in pain and would want to get out of there as soon as possible but I also knew the guys were worried about him too. And they’re his family. But when he finally came out, and our eyes locked, his expression told me all I needed to know.
He needed me.
He wanted me.
He knew I would be right by his side and that’s all that mattered to him.
And that’s all that matters to me now.
Griffin’s phone dings on the nightstand beside me. Hearing it reminds me that I took his phone last night and put it with mine so if he got notifications while he was sleeping they wouldn’t disturb him.
He deserves to sleep.
His body needs the rest.
When the screen lights up, I lift the phone not to necessarily read the message but to at least see who’s texting him. If it’s someone I can talk to on his behalf, I’m more than willing.
Mom
I need to hug my son so we’re on our way. Be there in about forty-five minutes.
Mom
We love you Griffin!
Oooh no!
They’re coming here?
Shit!
My mind quickly goes through a mental checklist of what I might need to do to prepare before they get here. To Griffin’s family, he and I are happily married and madly in love. And while this weekend did take a few steps toward that end path, we’re still living this lie.
And now it’s up to me to keep it going.
As quickly and smoothly as I possibly can, I slip from Griffin’s grasp moving my own pillow into his arms as a replacement.
The most important thing I should do is move my stuff from the guest room in here to Griffin’s room. If we’re a happily married couple, there would be no reason for me to use the guest room. His mom didn’t say if they were planning to spend the night or not so I should be prepared for either scenario.
Forty-five minutes is not a lot of time.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
I slide on a pair of Griffin’s pajama pants and then stop myself taking a deep breath.
Stay calm.
You can do this.
Everything will be fine.
There’s more than enough time.
I shuffle down the hall to the guest bedroom and grab a sports bra to put on along with a fresh t-shirt and then I brush my teeth and pull my hair up to a messy bun. Reminding myself that Griffin’s parents aren’t like mine and won’t care one bit if I’m dressed down, I get to work moving my stuff out of the room. With a handful of my dress clothes on hangers, I creep back into Griffin’s room and open his closet doors.
Holy shit.
It’s immaculate in here.
I don’t think I’ve ever known a man, other than my own father, whose closet is as organized as Griffin’s.
“What’ cha doing Naughty?” Griffin’s sleepy voice comes from the other side of the door.
“Moving in,” I grunt as I shove his clothes over to hang mine. When I peek past the closet door, I find Griffin wide awake watching me. He looks a bit tired still but also amused.
He brings an arm up behind his head, his chiseled chest on full display, the dark purple bruising along the side of his torso making me wince. “Whoa. God Griffin, that looks…” I shake my head, the right words not coming to mind.
He tries to look down at it too but simply shrugs his shoulder. “Meh. It’s just a bruise. I’ll be fine eventually.” He lifts his chin, gesturing to his closet. “You know it’s only eight-thirty, right?”
“Yep.” I nod.
He folds back the blankets and pats the empty space next to him. “Then why don’t you get your sweet ass back in this bed so I can cuddle with you for the whole damn day? I have nowhere I have to be so we could literally snuggle or eat food and watch television all day.”
I climb onto the bed, careful to steer clear of Griffin’s ribs, and kiss his lips. Not enough for him, he pulls me over his lap so I’m straddling him, but I respond with a pointed glare.
“Darius said no sex.”
“I know.” The sound that comes from his throat is a mixture of a sigh and a growl. “But I like feeling you on my cock.
His candidness makes me blush as does the tiny lift of his pelvis underneath me. “Griffin…”
“Naughty…” He chuckles but then winces, maneuvering his body to find a comfortable position.
“We’re not doing this. I don’t want to hurt you anymore than you already are.” I lift myself off of him but he grabs my hips and holds me down.
“And I promise you’re not. You’re perfect right here. I just want to look at your beautiful face.” He takes me in from top to bottom and smiles. “I like the messy bun look. You’re adorable.”
“And I like the whole chiseled abs adonis look you’ve got going on here,” I tell him, feathering my fingers lightly down his chest. I definitely don’t miss his eyes rolling back in his head or the “Mmmm…” that rumbles in his chest at my touch.
“But I need to tell you something.”
His eyes open and his gaze meets mine. “Okay.”
Cringing slightly, I tell him about the text message from his mom. “So, you’re parents are on their way. They’ll be here in about…” I glance at his alarm clock. “Twenty minutes or so.”
“Perfect.”
I lift my brows. “Perfect? You mean that doesn’t make you panic?”
He shrugs. “Why should it? They’re my parents. I’m sure Mom just wants to make sure I’m alive. They’ve seen me after much worse injuries, but I’m not surprised they want to see me. It must be a mom thing.”
I’m not sure my mom cares whether I’m alive or not…
“But…”
“Apartment’s clean,” he says, going through a mental checklist. “We can order food or Mom will most likely show up with something. There’s never a need to dress up. We keep things pretty casual so…” He runs his hands up my thighs, slipping his fingers into the waist band of the pajama pants I’m wearing and then tugs on them. “That gives me roughly…fifteen minutes for you to get up here and sit on my face so I can eat my breakfast.”
I burst out a laugh. “Get out of here. You are not even serious right now.”
With a wagging brow and a playful smirk on his face he responds, “Oh I’m dead serious.”
“But Darius?—”
“Said no sex,” he finishes my sentence. “No sex with my cock, blah blah blah. No thrusting or getting myself out of breath.” He shakes his head. “But he gave no such parameters for my tongue, so get the fuck up here, Naughty. I’m starving.”
Griffin’s the one who answers the door when his parents step off the elevator.
“Hey guys,” he says, welcoming in his mom, his dad, and Gage.
“There’s my boy,” Gail opens her arms and wraps them around Griffin’s neck in a tight embrace.
“Hi, Mom.”
“I’m glad to see you up and walking around. How bad was it because on the television screen it looked really bad.”
It looked bad from the seats too.
“It’s not that bad. Just a few bruised ribs.”
“You’ve definitely had worse than that before,” his dad reminds him as he steps inside and spots me in the middle of the living room. “Layken! How are you dear?”
He wraps me up in a warm hug as I respond, “I’m great. Thank you. I’m so glad you guys are here. How are you?”
“Oh, we’re just as dandy as ever.” He gestures back to Griffin’s mom. “Gail gets really antsy whenever Griffin gets injured. Always wants to check on him and make sure he’s okay.”
“Well, in my defense,” she says, overhearing our conversation, “Griffin didn’t have a wife to help take care of him before. That’s all.”
“Oh, well I don’t really feel like I’ve done much so far.” I shrug but Griffin shakes his head in disagreement.
“Don’t let her fool you, guys. Layken took charge before we even left the arena. She’s taken very good care of me so far.”
Griffin’s dad places his hands on my shoulders and gives them a fatherly squeeze. “Thank you, Layken. We’re so glad Griffin has you in his life.”
“Yes, thank you, Layken. You make my mommy heart settle just a little bit more having you around.” She steps from Griffin over to me and gives me a hug as well.
Gage on the other hand, gives his brother a nudge and then says, “Come on, let’s see it.”
“See what?” Griffin asks.
Gage gestures to Griffin’s shirt. “Lift it up and let’s see the injury. Is it badass?”
Gage is all grins. It’s cute to see he and Griffin interact together like the brothers they are. Like bruised ribs are nothing. All part of the game.
Battle scars.
Griffin chuckles lightly and then lifts his shirt, his entire left side clouded in shades of black, blue and purple. Gage nods in appreciation and then gives his brother a high five.
“That’s badass, bro.”
Griffin smiles. “You think so?”
“Yep. I think badass is your middle name.”
Hmm.
What is Griffin’s middle name?
I should probably know that.
“Well,” Gail says, rubbing her hands together and looking around. “What can we help you with while we’re here?”
“Absolutely nothing, Mom,” Griffin tells her, wrapping an arm over her shoulder. “I’m glad you guys are here and I have nothing on my agenda so you can relax and enjoy doing nothing right along with me.”
She glances around the living room, her brows furrowed. “Layken, there aren’t many things of yours around here. It’s all the same décor Griffin’s always had.” She brings her hands to her hips. “Is my son not letting you decorate the way you want to? Because if he’s giving you hard time because you like pink or something…”
“Yep.” Griffin nods, saving me from having to answer. “That’s it. Layken’s a sparkly pink girlie and I’m orange and blue all the way.” He holds his hand up in front of his mouth and loudly whispers to his mother, “Did you know she hates orange?”
He’s not wrong.
Orange is my least favorite color.
I am the pink sparkly girly type.
Probably another reason we don’t really mix.
Like how he’s a celebrity athlete and I don’t athlete at all.
Or how he’s a millionaire and I’m…well, currently unemployed.
“I don’t hate orange,” I remind Griffin, blushing, a bit embarrassed. “It’s just…not as shiny as pink. But to answer your question Mrs. Ollenberg, no, Griffin told me I could do literally whatever I wanted to the place to spruce it up a bit and bring a little of me into the space. I just wanted to live in it a bit first before I decide what feels right.”
My eyes move to Griffin who winks at me and then gestures in my direction.
“See, Mom? I can’t help it if Layken is a lazy mooch and hasn’t brought anything pink in here yet.”
My jaw drops and I laugh out loud at Griffin’s audacity, as does his mother. “Son, if you didn’t already have a set of finely bruised ribs, you certainly would now with a comment like that.”
Griffin steps over to me chuckling. “Nah, Lake knows I’m kidding.” He leans in and kisses my cheek, wrapping me in a hug. “She knows I love her.”
I kiss Griffin’s cheek in response and continue smiling on the outside even though on the inside I’m frozen in place with my jaw on the floor.
Did he just say he loves me?
I sent Griffin out of the kitchen to visit with his family while I clean up dinner. He doesn’t need to be up on his feet moving around so much and if that means I’m babying him a little, then so be it. He wants to get back out on the ice and I just want him to be happy. He doesn’t get to see his family as often as he wishes, especially during the busy season and my heart hurts for him when I see how happy he is hanging out with them. I know he wishes he was able to see them every day. Especially Gage. It shouldn’t take an injury and required time off for him to take the time to be with his family. Not when they’re as close as they are.
Watching him laugh with his brother or talk hockey with his dad, those are all things I never experienced growing up. We never had the encouraging talks around the dinner table. If it wasn’t a fight of some sort, it was my parents telling me what to do or what they scheduled me to do.
Or it was them telling me why my decisions were less than stellar. They never loved my group of friends. If it were up to them, I probably wouldn’t have had much of a social life at all. At least not until they met Corrigan. My parents loved her, but only because they respected the fact she’s a nurse, which to them is an admiral job. I guess someone in charge of making money for a hospital that provides care to children didn’t mean shit to them. To them I was just a money grabber.
Griffin is blessed with a wonderful, loving family.
And watching him with them, it seems he never takes that for granted.
“Can I help you finish up in here, Layken?” Gail asks, walking into the kitchen and grabbing a towel.
“Oh, um, sure.” I hand her a glass bowl I just finished washing and then she dries the other dishes I placed on the drying rack. “Thank you.”
“Of course,” she says with a smile. She moves around the kitchen putting dishes away as she dries them and I have to remind myself that she’s been here way more times than I have and probably knows every single thing about Griffin’s apartment.
Every nook and cranny.
Every piece of décor.
Hell, she probably purchased much of the stuff around here herself. I should’ve thought of bringing a few more things from my place here for days like this. The idea never once crossed my mind.
I’ll grab a few things tomorrow while I’m out.
“You’ve been pretty quiet today, sweetheart,” Gail mentions. “You okay?”
I turn my face to glance at her and she catches my eyes from underneath her glasses. I can tell from her expression it’s a sincere ask. She’s not trying to be nosey.
“Yeah.” I sigh. “Just a lot on my mind today I think.”
“Was this your first time seeing Griffin get hurt?”
Huffing out a laugh, I bob my head. “I mean, I had seen him get hurt a few times when I would watch him play. Little things, you know? I’ve seen him checked several times, obviously. And a few nights ago, with the skate blade to his arm. But yeah, this is the first big injury, for lack of a better word, that he’s gotten since I’ve been around.”
“Scary, isn’t it?”
I nod. “Very. I don’t think I’ll ever unsee him lying lifeless on the ice. And I’ll never unhear the scream when Darius rolled him over.”
She nods too as I describe those moments to her. “Sounds about right. When Griffin was a kid he broke his ankle during a game. Got all tripped up and fell right on it. Even though I know it’s not really possible, I swear to God I heard that bone snap in that moment. To me, it was the loudest sound I had ever heard even though in reality, I didn’t hear it at all.” She looks out past the half wall of the kitchen to the living room where the guys are watching television. “Grant had to pick him up and carry him to the car, uniform and all that day. The bone was shattered.”
“Oh, my gosh! That’s awful.”
“He was devastated. Thought he would never play again.” She inhales a deep breath and sighs with a loving smile on her face. “But six months later he was back on the ice as if it had never happened in the first place.”
“Wow.”
“When Griffin puts his mind to something, when he really wants it, he makes it happen. He’s tougher than I give him credit for sometimes.”
Gail goes back to drying some of the other dishes as I wipe down counters. A comfortable silence falls between us and then out of nowhere she says, “He loves you very much.”
Her comment catches me totally off guard.
“What?”
She smiles, knowing her comment did exactly what she wanted it to do. “I can see it all over his face. The way he looks at you.”
“You do?”
She nods. “I’ve never seen him look at a woman the way he looks at you.” She shrugs her shoulder. “Maybe it’s a mom thing. But we can tell. We know. There’s a kind of love and longing in the way he looks at you. Like you own his world and he hangs on your every word.”
He looks at me a certain way?
He really loves me?
He hasn’t said those words to me.
Does she really know?
What does she mean by that?
Does she know everything?
There’s no way Griffin told her and didn’t tell me.
Guilt consumes me.
Griffin’s parents are some of the most compassionate and loving people I know and we’re lying to them. Okay, maybe not really lying, but we’re not telling the whole truth either.
I don’t know what to do.
I want to tell her.
I want to tell her everything.
She feels like someone I can trust.
But what if I’m totally wrong?
My mom’s voice rings through my mind.
“If you think we’re going to help you out of every fucked-up situation you get yourself into…”
“You’ll never amount to anything…”
How can I have any real relationship with Gail if I’m not one hundred percent honest? And if I don’t have a great relationship with her…what will Griffin think? He’s head over heels for his family. Hell, I’m head over heels for them too.
“Gail?” I say with a huge lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. Hearing the vulnerability in my voice she turns to look at me. She lays a hand on my arm and tilts her head.
“What is it, sweetheart?”
I inhale a huge breath and look out at the man I’ve come to know over the past month or so. The man who has given me more love and kindness in such a short time than anyone has ever shown me before.
The man I’m falling for.
“I need to tell you something,” I murmur as to not pull the attention of the guys. “And it’s kind of a big something.”
Gail studies me for a moment and then narrows her eyes a bit before asking, “Is this a wine-drinking kind of conversation? I feel like maybe we need wine. What do you say?”
A smile spreads across my face because somehow even when the world feels like it’s about to swallow in around me, Griffin’s mom sees the trepidation on my face and works to put me at ease.
“Wine would be great, yes.”
She winks at me and turns to grab two glasses while I pick two different bottles of wine from the fridge. I pour a glass of white for myself and red for Gail and then we make ourselves comfortable against the counter to chat.
“It’s my fault,” I tell her. “Everything that’s happened in the past couple of months is my fault. Please don’t be upset with Griffin.”
“What do you mean?”
“The wedding…our marriage.” I shake my head. “Mrs. Ollenberg, we didn’t get married because we were in love.” I swallow. “We got married because I lost my job at the hospital and showed up here that night. The team was here and Corrigan Hicks is my best friend.”
“Coach Hicks’s daughter?”
“Yeah. She works at the hospital where I used to work.”
She nods, listening. “I see.”
“Anyway, it was this whole thing at the time. There was a water main break in my apartment building and we weren’t going to have water for about a week while the city did repairs and I was a hot mess of sadness and confusion and I didn’t know what to do and Griffin was gracious enough to offer me his guest room. And then the team invited me to tag along to Napa and Griffin was so kind to me. He just wanted to help get my mind off of losing my job and feeling down about myself. He wanted to help make me smile.”
Gail smiles. “Sounds like Griffin.”
“One hundred percent. But we both drank a little too much one night and we were walking through the festival markets at Napa and then we found ourselves standing in front of this little wedding chapel.”
“Uh huh.” She smirks. “And is this where you tied up my son and carried him into a chapel to say I do?”
My brows furrow. “What? Oh, my gosh, no. I would never…” I shake my head, my heart beating loudly in my ears.
She takes a sip of her wine. “So, you didn’t force Griffin into anything then? He made the choice of his own accord?”
I consider what she’s asking me. “Well, yes, but?—”
She rests her hand over mine on the countertop and looks at me pointedly. “Then this is not all your fault, Layken.”
“Wait…” I shake my head slowly wondering if the wine is really getting to me that quickly. “What?”
Gail smiles. “My son has done some very stupid things in his lifetime, Layken.” She pats my hand and looks out toward the living room before glancing back at me. “But I don’t think marrying you was one of them.”
My eyes glisten and I try to blink back the tears to no avail. “Mrs. Ollenberg, I think I might be in love with your son.”
“Oh, I know you are dear. And as I said before, he’s crazy about you.”
I swipe at my tears with my fingertips. “But how do you really know?”
“Ask me how many times he’s brought a girl home to meet his family,” she says, taking a sip of her wine.
My eyes flick to Griffin and then back to his mother. I don’t even have to ask before she’s shaking her head.
“Never?” I ask, bewildered.
“Not once.”
“But…why?”
She shrugs her shoulder. “Because until you, he’d always told us he’d never found someone worth our time. He knew they weren’t the one and didn’t want to start a relationship between us and his partner that he knew wouldn’t last.” She drinks her wine slowly. “But you…” She smiles and nods her head. “You’re good for him. And he for you.”
“He’s perfect,” I say, absentmindedly watching him laugh with Gage over a video on Gage’s phone.
“Oh, sweet girl, he’s far from perfect and I can say that because I’m his mother,” she laughs. “But sometimes…sometimes, Layken. Love shows up in the oddest of ways and always when you’re least expecting it.”
“So…you’re not…upset?”
“Just the opposite actually.” Her eyes sparkle and her grin grows wider. “I get a front row seat to watch you two fall in love and flourish together. Call me a hopeless romantic but I’m damn sure this will be better than any romance book I could ever read.” She takes hold of my hand and gives it a loving squeeze and I just want to cry my eyes out.
Because I’ve never felt so loved in my entire life.
I squeeze her hand back and mouth, “Thank you, Gail.”