Chapter 10
“Marta has three offers on my condo. All above asking.” Cami poured hot water over an English Breakfast tea bag on a calm Saturday morning and placed the stainless-steel kettle back on the electric stovetop in her sister’s kitchen.
“Already? Good for you. So you’re not going to lease it?” Annalise sat at her kitchen table, the sun streaming in through the windows, lighting the whitewashed table.
“Marta doesn’t think there’s a market for leasing. And she’s got three good offers. She is a Realtor, after all. When I come back, I’ll find an even better place. The loft was almost too small for me anyway. Are you sure you want hot tea? It’s a thousand degrees outside. I can ice it for you.”
“I’ll take it hot. With a little cream and honey, like Mama used to make it.”
Cami went through the motions of making the tea, just like Mama always had when they weren’t feeling well. Not that Annalise would ever admit to feeling less than a hundred percent.
“How was Indy?”
“Busy.” Cami sank into the chair across from her sister. “The office space Dad bought is going to be really classy when the build-out is done.”
“What about the apartment listings? Did any of those work out for you?”
Cami shook her head. “None of them felt like home.” In fact, the only place that felt like home these days was the inn. Which she would never own.
“You’re running out of time. You need to find a place. It doesn’t have to be permanent. Just until you do find the place that you can call home.”
“That’s just it. I’m not sure I want to call Indy home.”
“Is this about the inn?”
“Maybe. And Ben. I don’t know. You should’ve seen Dad, Annalise. Standing in my office, head down, hands in his pockets, saying please.”
“He doesn’t feel about the inn like you do.”
“I wish he’d talk to me.”
“Why don’t you talk to him?”
“I might.” Cami leaned toward her sister. “Did you see a doctor? You’re looking brighter.”
“I told you it was food poisoning from sushi.”
“For a month?”
“It’s not been a month.”
“Almost.”
Annalise raised her eyebrow, giving Cami that look, the one that said she wouldn’t say anymore.
Fine. She’d let it go. For now. “How’s things with the great wedding?”
“Going well. She’s calmed down a bit.” Annalise sipped her tea with a bit of a smile on her lips. “What’s going on with you? I can tell something is bothering you.”
“Did you hear me say Dad said ‘Please’?”
“Don’t sound so shocked. He says please all the time.”
“Not when it comes to an Akron deal. I’m telling you, he was contrite, soft-spoken… Not the usual bulldog Brant Jackson demanding his way.
“I don’t think he’s gotten over Mama’s death. He holds it all in,” Annalise said.
“He holds it against me.”
Annalise peered at Cami over the edge of her cup. “I know you think he does, but you’re wrong. You’re his daughter. If you really believe he blames you, talk to him.”
“And then have it confirmed that Mama’s death was my responsibility? No thanks.”
“How is death anyone’s responsibility? God gives and takes life.”
“Because I was there, Annalise.” Cami scooted back from the table and stared out the sink window. The image of Mama lying on the cottage floor had only dulled slightly with time. “I didn’t help her.”
“You were fifteen and your mom collapsed, not breathing. What were you supposed to do?”
“I tried CPR, I—” She turned to her sister. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring all this up. I’ve put it behind me, and it should stay behind me. I wanted to buy the inn as a memorial to Mama, but Dad clearly has issues with it.”
“Have you ever considered that he blames himself? That he wasn’t with her when she died. That he’d become a workaholic.”
Cami considered her sister’s insight. “I can’t see Brant Jackson blaming himself.”
“So, no inn? What about Ben?”
Ben, sweet Ben. Cami had tried to text him the truth a couple of times but couldn’t bring herself to hit Send.
She’d let him and herself down by not telling him that night at Angelo’s.
The last two weeks had also proved it would be impossible to have a long-distance relationship.
Not that she was actually counting on an Australia-to-America romance.
Meeting up every Fourth would most likely not happen. Life would get in the way. But she had her memories of this summer.
“I met Ben for dinner to tell him I couldn’t buy the inn, but he’d already signed the contract. He said he could go to Sydney in peace knowing the inn was in good hands.”
“So you didn’t tell him?”
“No, and I feel really horrible about it. I’ve lost sleep over it.”
“That’s not fair, Cami. He’s been gone two weeks thinking the inn was taken care of. What’s he going to do when he comes home? Scramble to find a solution?”
“I know, I know.” She peered in her teacup as if to find an answer. “I’ve decided to call in every favor I have to get him a new buyer. One who will care about the place.”
“You could always just tell Dad you want it. I know you long for his approval, but you’re twenty-nine, Cami. You’re a savvy businesswoman who can make her own decisions.”
“Annalise, I tell you, if you’d seen him…” Cami sipped her tea. “There’s more to the story. Astrid found the contract on my desk and put it in the system as a pending sale, which means inspections and surveys are automatically being scheduled.”
“Oh, Cami. You didn’t tell her?”
“Didn’t think I needed to tell her. Dad will be furious. He won’t be the contrite man saying, ‘Please.’ But I still have to tell Ben I can’t buy it. And that really pains me. I like him. I want his respect too. And I hate breaking contracts.”
“Dad won’t be furious, and if he is, so what?
Maybe you’ll have the discussion you’ve needed to have for years.
” Annalise reached across the table for Cami’s hand.
“My dear sister, Ben will understand. As for Dad, he’ll get over himself.
But you, stop blaming yourself for Mama’s death.
You walk around like you have to be perfect and make up for something you didn’t do. ”
“I do not think I have to be perfect.”
“Yes, you do. For Dad, now Ben. Cami, listen to me. I’ll say it again.
God is the giver and taker of life. You have to trust Him that He loved Mama more than any of us, and if that summer day had not been her time, she’d still be here.
Sweetie, she had a heart attack and was dead before she hit the ground. ”
“I remember. She clutched her chest, cried out, and fell to the ground.”
“Then you know it’s not your fault.”
“You know what Dad said to me. ‘When it’s my time, I hope your sister is there. She’ll know what to do. She’ll not let me die.’”
“He didn’t mean it. He was angry. Hurt. Scared. Had lost the love of his life. Now he had to raise two daughters alone. He lashed out. It wasn’t right, but don’t let his words hang over you like a fog.”
“Me? He’s the one in the fog. I will always be the girl who let her mom die.”
“Then maybe it’s time for you to make a stand. Step away. Find what you’re looking for. Find peace and forgiveness. There is Someone who wants you to find Him. Someone waiting for you to call out to Him.”
Cami smiled and dabbed her eyes with the edge of her napkin. “Mama always brought everything back to her faith. When did you start?”
“I never stopped. I just didn’t push it on you. Cami, God doesn’t blame you. It was Mama’s time. She is happier, healthier, and better off in heaven. She’s singing praises, painting extraordinary pictures.”
“You’re right. And I guess she’d tell me to let go of the past. Including the inn.
It would be a lot to oversee renovations from Indianapolis.
I’d have to hire a manager to run things.
” Deciding she was hungry, Cami grabbed some cheddar cheese and an apple out of the fridge.
“I did see it, though, as a haven for people like Mama. Artists, or anyone really, who need an escape or a refuge.”
“But it’s in the system, right? Are you going ahead with it? Dad can just deal.”
“I’m not sure I’m brave enough to face him. I can deal with hard-nosed buyers without batting an eye, but Dad is a different beast.”
“Does Ben Carter have anything to do with your desire to buy the inn?”
Excitement shot through her at the mention of Ben’s name.
“It’s not about Ben, but I really don’t want to let him down.
” Cami cut up the cheese and apples, plated them with some crackers, and placed them in the center of the table.
“Do you remember how much time we spent in the pool at the inn? We used to beg Dad to build us one in our backyard.”
Annalise reached for an apple slice. “He never did. Secretly, I think he liked going to spend time by the pool as much as we did. But he eventually stopped going.”
“See? Good memories. I just feel like if someone else buys the inn, they’re going to change it too much or knock it down. If it was any other property, that’s what I’d do. But if that happens, we’ll lose the last real memory of Mama as well as Ben’s grandparents.”
“We have all kinds of memories of Mama. Ben has the ones with his grandparents. But some of my favorite family memories are the church picnics or family game nights. How Mama really went all out for our birthdays and the holidays.”
Cami grabbed a slice of apple and topped it with a bite of cheese. “I gave up church, and Dad sold the house. Maybe I don’t want to give up all things related to Mama.”
“Then find your faith. Of all the things you’re doing, Mama would want you to have faith.
Determine to trust God with your career, with Dad, even with Ben.
It can’t be like that half-marathon we used to dream of running but never trained for.
You have to make time to get to know the One you need to trust.”