Chapter 23
CHAPTER 23
“Gabriel, I…” Corinne’s voice trails off.
The connection falls quiet, and I know Doug and Corinne are on the other end, too shocked to form words.
I stare at Gabriel’s cell phone, lying on the kitchen table with the speaker turned on, and wait. I’d suggested Gabriel tell his parents in person, but Gabriel’s only response was, “Nash would’ve never done this.” Then he brought up his mom’s contact in his phone and pressed send. I don’t think Gabriel can look his parents in the eyes and say these words. Honestly, I don’t even care. I am too broken.
“What are you going to do?” Doug asks, disbelief in his tone.
“Get a lawyer,” Gabriel answers, voice soft.
“You’d better get someone good,” Corinne adds, stress thinning her words. “How do you plan on finding one?”
“Avery found someone this morning. She’s already left him a message.”
“Maybe I should look, too,” Corinne says. “I could ask?—”
“No, Mom.” Gabriel stretches a hand across his face, fingers rubbing at his temples.
“Do you trust her to choose a good lawyer? After she let this happen to you?”
I throw out my hands, ready to defend myself, when she adds, “She knew you were in trouble. She told me you had a drink in St. Lucia, but she said it was only one. She should’ve told me what was going on, and I could’ve prevented all this from happening.”
Gabriel looks at me, head inching back as if dazed, like he’s surprised I was capable of going to his mother. Maybe he didn’t understand until now just how scared I was for him. For us.
“You couldn’t have prevented a thing, Corinne.” Stress and exhaustion make my eyes ache. “This is partially your fault in the first place.” The words are whispered, so she cannot hear them, but Gabriel’s gaze meets mine, and he hangs his head like he did last night.
“You knew he was drinking,” Corinne says, her voice rising and falling in a panic. “For how long? How much? Why didn’t you tell me?” Her breath turns shallow and shaky.
“Corinne, take a deep breath,” Doug instructs.
I’m already walking away from the phone. My head is barely above water. If I stay in the conversation, there’s no telling what I’ll do or say.
“It wasn’t her place to tell you, Mom,” is the last thing I hear before I walk out the front door. I spend a quick second wondering where Gabriel’s truck is before I remember it is in police custody. Evidence .
I sit down behind a brick pillar at the end of the porch, where I’m hidden from the view of the street. My head drops into my hands, and my eyes close.
The tenor of Gabriel's voice floats through the front door. He's still talking to his parents, and soon it will be my turn to tell my dad and Lara. The rug will be ripped from under them, just as it has been for Doug and Corinne. At least Gabriel's parents knew of his prior problem. For my dad and Lara, every facet of this will come as a shock. The same goes for Cam. I'll have to pull back the curtain, and reveal it all.
The therapist in me understands the trajectory. Ignored g rief and guilt from Nash, triggered by Ryan. The wife in me is devastated that our life, that I , wasn’t enough to keep him steady. I cannot comprehend all the tiny but impactful moments I saw but somehow still missed.
Me, of all people. The therapist.
I could draw a detailed map of our time together, and yet, here I am, wondering how we got here.