23. Elsa
Chapter Twenty-Three
Elsa
When Haven walked into the apartment a while later, I ordered my hormones to stand down and my belly to stop feeling all hot and tingly.
I’d hustled over here after dinner, if only because I was trying not to behave like a silly girl with a crush and linger near him.
He toed his boots off by the door and began walking across the room before stopping a few feet away.
“What?” he asked.
“What do you mean?” I countered.
I knew my cheeks were red because the heat was burning me up inside.
Honestly, it wasn’t fair. Haven was one of those guys who looked maddeningly hot without even trying.
He was the definition of lumbersexual. My God—at the moment, he was wearing jeans so faded and soft that they molded to his muscled thighs as if the fabric itself had a thing for him.
When he lifted his big, strong hand—a hand that had touched all the parts of me, a hand that I knew felt good everywhere—to run it through his hair, his shirt lifted a little at the bottom. That faded navy T-shirt illuminated the blue of his eyes.
I swear, clothes for this man were made just to show him off.
His broad shoulders, his lean, muscled chest and back.
I mentally shook my thoughts back to my point.
His T-shirt hitched up just high enough that I got a teasing peek at his muscled abs.
I didn’t even know how it was possible, but the heat cranked hotter inside me.
He dropped his hand, and his now mussed hair was even sexier.
“Elsa, you have…” He circled his hand in the air. “I don’t know… a look. Are you okay?”
Fair question. I wasn’t okay. Not at all. I needed him to slake the need pounding like an impatient fist on a door into my heart and body.
I wanted him naked and buried inside me, but first, I wanted the foreplay because, holy hell, Haven Silver gave good foreplay.
“I’m fine,” I squeaked.
I stood by the kitchen counter and backed up as he approached.
I could have sworn his eyes darkened, but that had to be all in my head.
By the time he stopped in front of me, I could hardly catch my breath, and my pulse had snapped loose from the thin tether restraining it.
I questioned if it was possible for me to survive the pace of my heartbeat.
Maybe I would just die from it, and then I wouldn’t have to deal with a broken heart. Haven was going to ruin me.
“I don’t think you’re fine.” He paused, shaking his head slightly before his lips kicked up in that half grin that sent my belly into a crazy swoop. “To clarify, you are fine , but I don’t think that’s what you mean.”
I managed to roll my eyes, and then suddenly, I lost the capacity to play it cool.
“Haven...” My voice had a frayed edge. “I’m worried. This is getting more complicated than I could have imagined when I said this could get complicated.”
“Hey, it’s okay.” His voice was soothing, and my heart felt splayed wide open because, sweet hell, I didn’t need this man to try to comfort me. I suddenly wanted to cry.
“I feel really good with you. I like you, and I’m afraid.” I blinked, silently praying not to cry.
He stepped closer, lifting a hand to palm my cheek. His big, strong, battered touch was so gentle. When he trailed his thumb along the edge of my jaw and across my bottom lip, I wanted to curl into his hold and stay there forever.
“I like you. A lot. That’s a given, sweetheart,” he murmured in that gruff whisper that sent pinwheels of heat dancing over my skin and emotion twisting inside my heart.
His smile was gentle, twisting my heart more sharply.
I thought maybe I saw something like what I felt in his eyes, but I wasn’t confident to believe in it.
When he lifted his other hand and slid it through where my hair fell over my shoulder, one of his fingers spinning in a circle as he idly played with my hair, I could hardly contain myself.
“You know what I mean,” I whispered.
The heat in his gaze didn’t fade as he dragged his thumb slowly across my bottom lip. “I know what you mean.”
“What do we do?” I whispered.
“I don’t want to stop,” he said.
I knew this was reckless and unwise. Because I was that girl—the one who always fell for the wrong guy. In this case, it was beyond foolish because usually, I fell for the assholes. But Haven wasn’t an asshole. He was just a good guy whose life had dealt him a few too many gut punches.
“I really don’t want to stop,” he added.
Oh, my little heart, always so hopeful, squealed with joy. I ignored the rest for now because Haven and his whole family were everything I wanted, and I was back home where I felt like I belonged.
When his forehead fell to mine, and he whispered, “We’ll figure it out,” my chest ached with something tender and terrifying. “Can I kiss you?”
I felt those words on my lips, and my answer was to simply close the millimeters between us and lose myself in another kiss.
His mouth was open and lazy, sensual and lingering, and it was a good thing there was a counter behind me, and he was there in front to hold me.
Otherwise, I would have collapsed to the floor as I all but swooned.
When we finally broke apart and stared at each other, he trailed his knuckles over my cheek. “You have sand on your face,” he said, his lips teasing with a smile.
A giggle slipped out. “I’m sure there’s sand everywhere. But I was running late for dinner, and I know your mom likes to have dinner on time.” I took him in. “You have some dirt on your cheek.”
When a low chuckle rumbled in his throat, I all but swooned all over again inside.
“We could shower,” he pointed out. “Together, of course.”
The heat in his gaze scorched me just before he stepped back and caught my hand in his.
A little while later, I was crying his name as he held me in his arms with my back pressed against the shower wall and my legs curled around his hips. My orgasm broke through me in shimmering waves.
It was only after he dropped his head into the curve of my shoulder that I realized we’d forgotten a condom. A moment later, he lifted his head, smoothing a wet lock of hair off my cheek.
In that second, his eyes widened. “I forgot a condom,” he muttered.
“It’s okay,” I added.
“It is?”
“Yeah, I have an IUD.” He was quiet for a long beat. “Going forward, you don’t need to worry about it.”
His brows hitched up slightly. This was ridiculous. Even now, with him still inside me, I wanted him all over again. With his dark lashes spiky from the water, the blue of his eyes was brighter.
“That’s your call,” he said slowly.
“And I just called it,” I said, feeling a little stubborn about the whole thing.
I felt his chuckle against my chest and bit my lip as I giggled.
“I suppose we could rinse off again,” he said when he slowly eased me down, withdrawing as he did.
He reached behind him and turned the shower back on.
This had all started after I finished cleaning the sand off my body.
We rinsed off in the steamy water and, once again, fell asleep together.
That was becoming a habit. While the sexy times made my body sing, it was the intimacy that I felt curled up with him that made me worry about the state of my heart.
I kept telling myself that was a problem for another day.