Chapter 20
Chapter Twenty
“Epic.” Zinnia stared up at the first lover who’d made her feel cherished. Monty was one of a kind.
“Sure was.”
His soft smile turned her to mush. “Thank you for being so… tender.”
“It was my pleasure.”
“And mine. For once I didn’t feel like a chew toy.”
His eyebrows arched. “A chew toy? Yikes. It’s a wonder you let me near you.”
“I think somehow I knew you would be different. Oh, and next time…” She sucked in air. “Let’s close the windows.”
He choked on a laugh. “You think?”
“I wanted to yell so bad.”
“Me, too.”
“I don’t care how soundly everyone sleeps, they’d hear that.”
“Yeah.” He chuckled. “Loud conversation is one thing, but once we were into it, I realized—”
“Nobody sleeps that soundly.”
“And those sounds are… distinctive.” He grinned. “I’ll close them right now. I need to get up anyway.” And just like that, he was out of bed and headed for the bathroom.
Listening to the splash of water in the sink, she pictured him washing up. She considered following him in there and offering to help. That would be fun. She had yet to get her hands on his impressive bad boy.
Instead she stretched out with a deep sigh of satisfaction, luxuriating in an unfamiliar post-orgasm glow. Turned out a considerate lover made quite a difference. She was relaxed and yet energized.
Maybe she would go in there, after all. But as she sat up, Monty came out of the bathroom. Her breath caught. What a fool she would have been to walk out on this man.
He met her gaze. “I’m going to apologize in advance for the times I slip up and ogle you. I’ll do my best, but I’m—”
“Forget about it. You just earned yourself the right to ogle all you want. I intend to do the same.”
He chuckled. “You’ve got a deal.” With a complete lack of self-consciousness, he crossed to the window and closed it.
She didn’t miss a thing, not the flex of his deltoids or the tightening of his glutes. Poetry in motion.
He turned to face her. “I need to shut the rest of these. Want anything from the kitchen while I’m making the rounds?”
“Water would be great.” If someone had asked her to name her favorite side, she might have to choose the frontal view for obvious reasons, but both had their good points.
“Just water? My little sis decided I needed fattening up and brought me a box of sticky buns from her bakery.”
“Uncle Graham told me about Greta’s coffee shop. I’d hoped to stop in today when we went to—um, to the Raccoon for lunch but we ran out of time.” She caught herself before mentioning the bookshop visit. She wanted his gift to be a complete surprise.
“Then water and sticky buns it is.” He left the bedroom.
Watching him walk around naked had a predictable effect. She’d just been marveling at her level of relaxed satisfaction. A few minutes spent focused on his muscular body in motion and she was ready to rumble, the sooner the better.
But he was bringing them a snack. And she wanted his advice on next steps with the foal and Tex. Now might be a good time to talk about it.
She’d been vaguely aware of pillows during their recent adventure but hadn’t paid them much attention. He’d chosen four regular sized instead of two super-sized ones.
Propping them two-and-two against the curved wooden headboard, she leaned back facing the curved footboard at the end. Interesting that he’d decided on a sleigh bed. Or his grandmother had.
Crowded bookshelves in a matching dark wood sat on either side of the window.
Sure enough, he’d made room for Fozzy Bear on the second shelf from the top.
A rolltop desk of the same wood, a straight-backed desk chair and an upholstered easy chair in a dark green fabric took up the space on the other side of the room.
Neat, except for his sweats and her pjs lying on the floor. After seeing his efficiently packed medical case, this orderly bedroom didn’t surprise her.
Four framed pictures on the top shelf of the desk looked like they might be family photographs. Three were group shots. In the fourth, a woman in boots, jeans and a long-sleeved shirt leaned against a rail fence. She had light hair.
“Sticky buns time.” Monty walked in carrying a tray loaded with two tall water glasses and a plate piled high with pastry.
She laughed. “Are you trying to fatten me up?”
“No, ma’am. I’m trying to make you glad you knocked on my door.”
“I’m already glad. No need to bribe me with pastry.”
“Good to hear. Want me to take them back to the kitchen?”
“Not now. I can see them and I can smell them. I crave me some buns.” She wiggled her eyebrows.
“Don’t I know it.” He grinned, gave her the tray and climbed in beside her. “After I walked away and left you alone, I started worrying those second thoughts might come creeping back.”
“They didn’t.” Setting down the tray, she picked up a glass, a napkin and a sticky bun. “I’ve been absorbing my surroundings. Found your bear. He looks happy.”
“He likes it here.”
“I can see why. It’s a nice room.”
“I like it, too. This cottage always appealed to me.” He took a sip of water before grabbing a napkin and a sticky bun. “I’m lucky to have it.”
“Is the furniture yours or hers?” She bit into her treat. Amazing.
“The bed’s mine. The rest used to be hers, but she’s given it to me. I’ve loved that rolltop ever since I was a kid. She loves it, too, but there’s no room in the bunkhouse.”
“I assume those are pictures of your family?”
“Mm-hm.” He nodded, his mouth full of sticky bun.
“Who’s the lady on the end?”
He chewed and swallowed. “My mother.”
“It is? But—”
“She died in childbirth. Having me.”
“Oh.” She scrambled for the right thing to say. “That’s… is it… I mean, do you feel….”
“Sad? Sometimes. She was so young, the same age I am now.”
“That is young. Was your grandma around then?”
“Yes, and I’m sure she was a huge comfort and help to my dad. Then he married Raquel when I was fourteen months old. She’s the only mother I’ve ever known.”
“I did wonder why you didn’t look like her, but genetics can be wonky.”
“Not in your case. Tex looks exactly like you.”
“For which I’m grateful. He won’t remind me of his worthless father. But the poor kid will have to deal with this hair.” She held out a strand of it.
“You don’t like it?”
“It’s impossible. If I cut it short I look like a blonde Little Orphan Annie. If I let it grow out it looks like I stuck my finger in a light socket.”
“And if you let me run my fingers through it, I’ll want you all over again.”
“What?” She glanced at him. “You like the way it feels?”
“Love it. It’s like putting my fingers in a rippling brook.”
“Huh.” She took another sip of water and finished off her sticky bun. “I can’t agree with that, but it’s nice of you to say. I’ll remember it the next time I’m cussing it out. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. Who’d you inherit it from?”
“My dad.” She smiled. “He didn’t like it, either, so he kept his super short. Then he started going bald. Most men don’t like going bald, but he was happy about it.”
He gazed at her, his expression touchingly wistful. “I like the way you talk about him. You look… happy.”
“It took a while.” And he hadn’t made it to that place, poor guy.
“I still struggle sometimes.”
“Sure you do. You’ve only had a couple of years. I’ve had ten. It gets easier.”
His chest heaved. “That’s what I tell myself. That’s what we all tell ourselves.”
Reaching over, she squeezed his arm. “You’ll get there. He’d want you to be happy, just like my folks would want that for Mari and me.”
“Yeah, I know. Listen, speaking about your dad, Graham thought I should share my experience with this name thing.” He polished off his sticky bun and picked up another one.
“Which name thing? We have more than one name thing.” She grabbed a second pastry, too.
“The Sebastian one. The thing is, when I ditched Montgomery, my dad continued calling me that. Ticked me off when I was younger, but I finally let it go.”
“You think I should start calling Tex Sebastian?”
“Not at all. But maybe in a couple of years you might try explaining why you love that name and what it would mean to you if he used it. It could change his perspective. It would’ve changed mine.”
She studied his profile. The hint of tension in his jawline told her this wasn’t a comfy subject. “I take it your dad never explained why he hung onto Montgomery.”
“Not fully. He just said it was a good name and he wanted to keep using it. I thought he was just being stubborn. He could be stubborn.”
“But there was more to it?”
“Yeah. I didn’t find out until yesterday when Graham told me.”
“Good grief! When did he do that? We had so much going on—”
“When we went to fetch the hay bales before dinner. Seems my mother adored the name Montgomery and swore she’d never shorten it even if others did. My dad kept using the whole thing to honor her memory.”
“Why didn’t he tell you?”
“I guess because he would have had to talk about her and he avoided doing that. He never really got over her death.”
“That’s too bad. For him and for you kids.”
“It wasn’t great. We learned to avoid the subject. My information about her came from my grandma, Adam and Claudie, plus whatever my mom — Raquel — had learned. My grandma says he blamed himself, like it was his fault she died.”
“Was there any reason why he would?”
“Grandma says absolutely not. Maybe calling an ambulance would have made a difference instead of Dad driving her to the hospital, but she didn’t want one and insisted she was fine.”
“I can see refusing that option when you’re in labor. Who wants sirens and flashing lights?”
“She obviously didn’t. She would have had access to medical intervention earlier, but the choice was hers. Nobody predicted it would go bad so fast.”
“It sounds like your dad did blame himself, though, if he wasn’t able to talk about her.”
“Sadly, it makes sense. He was the guy who could do it all — town mayor, home builder, rancher, rescuer of wild horses. But he couldn’t save the woman he loved.”
“I’m guessing he wasn’t the type who’d go see a therapist.”
“He’d rather die. Which he did.” His chest heaved. “And why the hell did I have to bring this up now? It could have waited. Sorry.”
Zinnia picked up the tray and moved it to the bedside table. Then she crawled into his lap, took away his glass and put it on the other nightstand. “You picked the perfect time, Montgomery Bridger. I gots you.” Cradling his face in her hands, she kissed him.