Chapter 9
Chapter
Nine
“ L ooks like we’re the last ones here.” Stella walked into the conference room with their ginger-dead house balanced on a small tray and placed it on a table next to the others. The four houses would be a cute addition to the senior center, and she was glad they could do something fun while still giving back to the community.
“Everyone did a really good job,” Nate said as he stood next to her, taking in the different styles.
“We all did. I love how different they are. Obviously, this masterpiece belongs to Lucy.”
He nodded. “Because we all know Eric did not think to make stained-glass windows out of Fruit Roll-ups.”
Stella turned to the house with creatures dangling from the roof and melted marshmallow wrapped around the house, probably supposed to be spider webs but looking more like a s’more explosion. “And I’ll say this haphazard one had Johnny and Angie written all over it.”
“Definitely.”
She repositioned the pumpkin gummy that had come loose during transport while he watched her every move, much like he had before the tiny trick-or-treater interrupted them at the zoo. She thought for sure that something was happening between them. But how much could you really tell from a look, anyway? He probably was just concerned for her, the way she spilled her guts about her failed audition, her failed relationship. He was likely wondering what else she’d failed at in life.
“It’s late, so we should probably get back to the room.” She gestured to the door, embarrassment settling in like a dense fog because she wished she hadn’t unloaded like that. He was her employee. Her fake boyfriend. None of those things qualified him as her emotional support person, though wasn’t that what he’d been a few times this week already? She was just confused, and this crush she was harboring for Nate wasn’t helping. What she really needed right now was some space. Not that she was going to find it in their shared room, but maybe a warm shower would be enough to give her a few minutes alone to think.
“Uh, Stella,” he said as he turned from the door. “It’s locked.”
“That’s not possible.”
He twisted the handle, pushing and pulling the door as he did so. “It’s possible.”
So much for space.
Her eyes tracked to the center of the room, at the giant divider that split the long banquet area in two. She rushed over to it because if they could get it to open, maybe the door on the other side of the room would be unlocked. But after a couple tugs on the handle, she gave up.
“Do you have your phone?” he asked, and she couldn’t believe she hadn’t thought of that. Or that she’d left it in the room because she hadn’t brought a purse.
“No. Do you?”
He shook his head. “I meant to, but I was…” A pink hue climbed up his cheeks as he swallowed. “…distracted when we were leaving the room tonight.” His teeth raked along his bottom lip, and she wasn’t even sure he realized he was doing it. He watched as his foot traced the octagonal shapes in the carpet.
“I was too.”
His head snapped up, and the other corner of his mouth joined the party, treating her to the closest thing to a full smile as she’d ever gotten from him. And it was all because of their almost-kiss. Wasn’t it? It had to be.
“What happened earlier…”
“Don’t worry about it, Stella.” He peered up from the floor, pulling off his scarecrow hat and tossing it on an empty table. “You deserve better. I hope you know that.”
“Oh,” she said softly, disappointment tingeing the single word. This was his way of letting her down, wasn’t it? Of course it was. He was reluctant to do this whole relationship thing when it was fake. No way did he want anything real to come from this. And oh goodness, now the three of them were going to be stuck in this room until the janitor decided to drop by: Nate, her, and her humiliation.
“Your ex…you didn’t deserve that.”
Oh. Ooooooh. So, he wasn’t talking about the near-kiss. She had no confirmation he was agreeable to it, but at least he wasn’t turning her down. Yet.
“I’m sorry he didn’t see how amazing you are. I’m sorry he didn’t support your dreams, even when they changed. And I’m sorry he couldn’t see what made you happy. Because you deserve to be happy. Like, real happy.”
She covered her face with her hands. “So, not only did you see my dancing the night I punched you, but you also heard the song I was singing.”
“We’ll use the word singing loosely.” And there it was—another smile. “But seriously…the guy you’re with should know how lucky he is to have you, and nothing should stop him from?—”
“Dressing like a scarecrow?” The room fell silent, save for the hum of the fluorescent lights overhead, and they both stood there, frozen in place, like they had just realized the same thing at the same time. At least, she prayed that was the case for Nate. She took a step toward him, and then another, before he did the same.
He cleared his throat. “I was going to say showing up , but…”
“But what?” She had to know. For as hard as Nate was to read, for as locked up as he kept his emotions, she needed to hear him say that he was starting to have the same feelings she was.
“But I’m starting to think I’d dress like a scarecrow any day you asked just to make sure you knew there was always someone in your corner. And not because we work together, or because I’m supposed to look like I’m your boyfriend.”
“Then why?”
“Because I just want to.”
She took another step, one he matched. And now they were standing close enough that his chest brushed hers with each breath he took. “Do you know what I want, Nate?”
His throat bobbed before he spoke. “What’s that?”
“I want you to kiss me.”
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea.” His breath was warm as it tickled her face, and the rasp of his voice sent a shiver down her spine. But he didn’t move back. “You don’t want someone like me to kiss you.”
“Absolutely, I do.” She grabbed his hand with one of hers and brought it up to their chests. “You care about me. And you keep me safe.” She reached for his other hand and did the same. “And above all, Nate…you’re a good man.”
He narrowed his jet-black eyes at her as his thumb fiddled with the ring on her finger. “Do you really believe that?”
“With my whole heart.”
He sucked in a deep breath as his eyes moved to the side, and before she had a second to let doubt fill her mind, he kissed her.
No, that wasn’t right. He wasn’t kissing her—he was devouring her, savoring every second of their bodies pressed together and their lips doing something it seemed they were meant to do from the moment they first met. He wrapped his arms around her, running them up her back, pressing her into him. Any other time he’d held her, he’d felt stiff, solid. But right now, as their mouths moved in sync as though they were part of a choreographed routine, his body melted into hers, a warm soft caramel she sank into.
“Stella,” he growled between kisses and gasps for breath. She’d never heard her name with such urgency, such passion before. They broke apart, both needing a bit of air. He touched his forehead to hers. “I’m sorry I didn’t go along with the fake dating thing when you first asked. I think I was afraid this might happen all along.”
She smiled softly as she shook her head. “ This is what you were afraid of? Kissing me?”
“Alright, kids. Time to break it up.” A rotund man shined a flashlight on them, which was really quite unnecessary since the room wasn’t dark. Nate put himself between her and the man dressed as a forest ranger. “Oh, not kids, I see. Maybe you two should get a room.”
“Sorry, sir,” Nate said as he grabbed her hand and walked out of the room.
“What just happened?” she asked once they were in the hallway.
“Well, I think we just got busted like a couple of teenagers.”
“Hey! Hey! Hey!” Lucy shouted from the other end of the hallway. “We were just looking for you two.”
“Great,” Nathan grumbled. “You found us.”
“We were getting everyone together to get some ice cream upstairs, if you’re interested.”
Stella was never one to turn down ice cream, but right now, that was all she wanted to do. But this was Lucy’s weekend, so she’d take one for the team. Besides, she was sharing a room with Nate. She’d have a chance to chat with him later.
“Is it just me, or was I totally born to do this?”
Stella heard Johnny’s loud whisper over the pinky-plonky music in the yoga studio where her cousin, once again, had scheduled another couples activity.
“It’s just you, man,” Max stage-whispered from the other side of the room, eliciting chuckles from the rest of the group.
For all the things Johnny was, flexible wasn’t one of them, as evidenced by his current state—a jumble of limbs in no way resembling the lithe instructor on the raised stage at the front of the room.But who was she to judge? She was in the middle of begging every muscle fiber in her burning quads to play nice and not let her collapse, but she couldn’t resist peeking over her right shoulder.
At the man on the mat next to her.
“You’re doing really well,” Nate encouraged from beside her.
He was lying, of course, but she just smiled and said thanks with what little air she had in her lungs.
He was putting on a clinic, his body as agile and controlled as any she’d ever seen. Not a trembling muscle in sight, no scrunched-up face of someone holding off a trip to the bathroom like Stella had seen on her own face with the help of the giant mirrors surrounding them. His face was so relaxed, his body so steady, a boulder could have rolled into the room, Indiana Jones-style, and he probably would have still been standing there in the perfect Warrior II.
Though, he’d always been the epitome of unflappable, so it shouldn’t have surprised her. Except, what had happened at the aerial course? It was the only time she’d seen him as anything other than his stoic self. Something in that moment had tossed him on his side, and she couldn’t figure out why. Though, it was hard to analyze much of anything when he’d wrapped her in his arms, the firm muscles acting both like a protective shield and a soothing blanket at the same time. She could still feel his warm breath kissing every sliver of exposed skin on her neck. And then there was the actual kissing last night. The kissing she couldn’t get out of her head even if she tried. But why would she have tried? It was one of the best moments of her entire life. Though, not one they’d gotten to talk about. After their ice cream last night, Eric whisked the guys away for a little poker game in the lobby—his version of a bachelor party—and Nate was gone by the time she’d woken up this morning. This afternoon’s yoga class was the first she’d seen him all day.
“Everything okay?” Nate’s voice snapped her back to the present.
“Um,” she began then stretched it into an awkward ommm because she needed a beat to figure out why everyone was in a standing position, and she was still rolled up on the floor in Happy Baby. It was all his fault. If he hadn’t kissed her senseless last night, she still wouldn’t be replaying it in her head like a film a football team studies to learn their opponent’s every move. Heck with that—his kissing was worthy of a place on the silver screen. “This stretch is just my favorite. That’s all.” Not a lie, though not a reason to remain on the floor while the rest of the couples carried on.
“Here,” Nate said, extending a hand for her to grab—a hand at the end of an arm she’d just spent an indeterminate amount of the class daydreaming about. She wondered if the class had gone from ordinary to hot yoga, because it was certainly getting warm in here.
As she slid her palm into his, the warmth of his skin melted her like putty, heat sprinting up her arm like it had been struck with a match.
Yep. This was definitely hot yoga.
“Now let’s recenter with a deep inhale, stretching our hands high above our heads and bringing our minds back to this present moment and away from anything that’s distracting us.”
Stella was all for bringing her mind back to places where it belonged, though she did miss the feel of her hands in his. She forced her chest to expand at least twice its usual size because the deeper the breath, the better she could recenter, and the less likely her mind would wander off to places that made her body simultaneously chill and burn.
“Now, at the beginning of class, I noticed a couple that was really in tune with one another, really embracing what this class is all about,” the instructor said from atop the raised stage at the front of the room. “They did a perfect Boat for Two, a pose that’s only perfected when a couple works as a team. And I’d like to invite them to the front, if they’d agree to do it.”
“Is this our big moment, baby?” Johnny whispered to Angie as he practically vibrated with excitement.
“In your dreams,” Max mumbled with a smirk that some might have found cocky, but he was the one here today with the certified yoga teacher as his partner. If he was smug, it was warranted.
“You two, right here,” the teacher said, pointing at…
“Us?” Stella squeaked in a voice like one of those dog whistles people could hardly hear, except the instructor must have been part canine, because she nodded and waved them along. “Seriously?” Her eyes darted around the room. There was obviously a camera around here somewhere. Something to capture this moment and let it live on the internet for all eternity. Something people sent to their colleagues and anyone needing a pick-me-up so they could laugh until they cried.
“Of course,” the instructor said with a nod, as serious as anything. So, maybe this wasn’t some elaborate viral moment prank? “You two make a wonderful team.”
That was true in many ways. In fact, she’d thought as much just this morning. But for this? Not so much.
“Is that okay?” Nate, the obvious MVP of this team, asked, turning to her. Of course it was okay. This was a beginner’s yoga class, half-filled with people she considered her closest friends. So, there was really no reason for this empty feeling in the pit of her stomach. Or the quiver of muscles that had, at long last, gotten a break.
“I’m so game,” she forced out with an enthusiasm she didn’t feel. But she was good at that, faking happy when she needed to. She grabbed his hand, managing to take a single step before he gently pulled her to a stop.
He leaned close—so close she could count the flecks of gold in his brown eyes, something she shouldn’t have noticed, but it was the distraction she’d needed at the time. “Stells,” he began, and the sound of her nickname on his lips slowed her breathing the littlest bit. “Are you alright?”
Huh. Looked like her acting skills had gotten a little rusty, because from the way his dark brows drew together, it didn’t seem like she was fooling him. But this was ridiculous. It was time to face…whatever this was.
“Absolutely.” And with a nod, she broke the strongest eye contact in the history of ever and pulled him to the stage.
They stood facing each other as the teacher had instructed, and Stella wiped her wet palms on her yoga pants, not daring to look down to see if they’d left a trail of sweat on them, but she was pretty sure they had.
“Look at our Stella…back on the stage again!” Lucy shouted with a clap, her megawatt smile filling the room. Only, the brightness didn’t make its way over to Stella.
The instructor was making a speech, something about teamwork and relying on each other. Details eluded Stella at the moment because it was more important for her to regulate her breathing, which had suddenly become shallow and fast.
“They make each other better,” the instructor continued. Who? Her and Nate? Not in this case. His knees weren’t shaking. His hands didn’t drip with sweat—not that she could see, anyway. Save for the worry lines creasing near his eyes, he was the picture of calm and cool under pressure.
And then there was Stella, wondering how much longer her legs were going to hold her up when it felt more and more like she was standing on tiny toothpicks in a windstorm. Wondering how much longer her heart could pound like this before it broke free of her ribcage and shot out of her chest. Wondering why something that had once been as natural to her as breathing had suddenly become so…impossible.
“You know what?” He grabbed his stomach and rubbed circles on it. “I think I’m experiencing some digestive…distress.”
“Oh no,” the instructor said, her face etched with worry, especially when he grabbed his rear end. Why hadn’t he just clutched his stomach? He had no idea, but he grabbed Stella’s hand with the other and started selling the act.
“Stella, I need you to come with me.”
“Uh, okay,” she said as he grabbed her hand, and they ran from the room together.