Chapter 5 #2
“Why would I be afraid?” He rose slowly to his feet. “I let you go, by the way.”
“Fair enough. I let you tackle me, by the way.” Another smile. More brittle this time. “I think you’re afraid because one minute you’re trying to fuck me, then you learn my deep dark secrets, and you act like I have the plague. I don’t, FYI.”
Now he surged toward her. “You think I’m keeping a distance because of what you told me about your father?”
Her chin notched up. Her hand also rose, and she jabbed him in the chest. “I think you kissed me like your life depended on it and then— Gray! ”
He’d caught her wrist. Using his hold, he spun her around and looped his arm over her. She found herself with her back flush against his chest and stomach, while his arm in front of her was a seemingly unbreakable bar.
“I am the last person who would ever judge you because of your father.” His breath whispered against her ear. “People in glass houses and all of that.”
Surprise rushed through her, even as Emerson drove her left elbow back against him as hard as she could.
He grunted but didn’t release her. Instead of trying to rush forward to get out of his grip, she stepped back, looped her foot behind his ankle, and then she slammed her whole body back, making them both fall.
But as he toppled, she rolled free and bounded back to her feet.
“Why is your house made of glass, Gray?”
He smiled up at her.
Oh, damn. Gray’s smile was absolutely, one hundred percent lethal.
She backed away.
He rose, slowly. “Come now, Emerson. You already know. You profiled me, remember?”
His mother had fled an abusive relationship. I think he is a protector now because he saw his mother abused when he was a child. He wants to protect those who are weak. “I spoke with Misty yesterday.”
“Did you.” Not a question.
“She’s at home in Georgia.”
“Um.”
“With her mom. With Timothy. Really crazy thing—she said that a bank account had been set up for her.” Emerson paused. “She started crying when she told me how much money was in the account.”
There was zero change to Gray’s expression.
“You know anything about the account?” Emerson pushed.
“Maybe it’s one of those crowd sourcing things.” He shrugged. “Or an anonymous donation. Those are really hard to track down. Especially if the donor doesn’t ever want to be found.”
She was staring at the donor. “She also got contacted by the teacher at a hearing-impaired school in her mother’s town. A doctor reached out about Timothy, too. All sorts of contacts are appearing.”
“Emerson, are we going to talk all day or should I just tackle you again?”
Tackle me. I dare you. “You made sure Misty and Timothy would be secure. You’re helping them. Because you’re a protector.”
“Pretty sure that her ex would call me something else.” A cold smile came and went on his face. “So would Jake Waller.”
Jake Waller was being held without bail. And currently being charged with eight counts of murder and kidnapping. Eight. The toolbox had helped them to discover the other victims.
Gray was clearly not going to admit that he’d gone the extra mile to help Misty, so she’d try another tactic. “Where is your father, Gray?” she asked.
He began to circle her.
Dammit. She started to circle him, too. Circling each other. Tension slithered beneath her skin.
“In the grave, rotting.” A roll of one shoulder.
“Or maybe in hell, burning. Either way, win for me.” His gaze didn’t leave her.
“My father was an abusive bastard. Sadistic. Narcissistic. No empathy. No remorse. But the guy was utterly fantastic when it came to manipulation and deceit. And really, really good at the old superficial charm tricks. Good when he wanted to be, anyway.”
Goosebumps rose onto her skin.
“Classic psychopathic personality disorder. And, of course, seeing as how you’re a doctor, a psychiatrist, then you know that some say there is plenty of evidence to suggest that can be inherited, too.
Nature or nurture. But sometimes, they both fuck you over.
” Gray flexed his wrist. “You know, it still hurts from where you broke it.”
Horrified, her gaze jumped to his wrist. She had broken his wrist, a while back, on their first case.
But only because she’d been trying to save his life, and she’d slammed her body into his in order to protect him from a hail of bullets.
But if the injury still pained him… “We shouldn’t be fighting!
I don’t want you to hurt it again and?—”
He’d gotten too close. His leg swept behind hers. She was falling down, again, dammit. But she grabbed him and twisted on the way down. If she was going down, then Emerson intended to take Gray with her.
He landed first. She fell on top of him.
“I lied,” he told her. Gray’s hands locked around her hips. “It doesn’t hurt at all. See, I’m good at manipulation, too.”
Emerson blew a lock of hair out of her eyes. “Tell me something that I don’t already know.”
“I’m not staying out of your bed because I’m worried you might be like your father. I can assure you, I don’t think about your father at all when I look at you.”
Her lips parted.
“I’m staying out of your bed because I lose control too easily with you.
I don’t believe I would be a safe lover for you to have.
” His hold tightened on her wrist. “And I think you crave safety. Despite the fact that you spend your days and nights trying to understand killers, I think—at your core—that safety is what you want most. Maybe that’s the whole reason you do try to understand the monsters out there.
You want to stop them, don’t you? To save the world. ”
“The victims,” Emerson whispered. Her legs had slid between his. She levered up, pushing her hands against his chest. “I want to save them.”
“Sometimes, we’re too late for that, and all we can do is stop the predators.”
Her gaze fell to his mouth. No more sexy smile. No taunting grin. She could remember, all too easily, what it felt like to have his mouth on hers.
“Don’t,” Gray warned.
She inhaled and forced her stare to rise and hold his. “Am I supposed to act like I don’t feel the giant cock shoving against me?”
He cursed.
“Because I do feel it. Super hard to miss it, in fact.” Because it is super hard.
His hands immediately let her go.
She rose, slowly. Maybe she deliberately slid her body against his.
He hissed out a breath. “Mistake.”
Was it? “I was supposed to give you my decision, remember? Partner or lover? Wasn’t that the big question that you posed in Briar?”
“Forget that.” He was on his feet, too. His body seemed extra tense. “Partner. I am your partner. ”
“I don’t like either-or situations. Why does it have to be one or the other?” She didn’t circle him. Just held her ground. “I’m sure there is some HR paperwork somewhere I can sign that says things between us are one hundred percent consensual.”
He stiffened. “Emerson.”
Yes, so she’d just made it abundantly clear—at least, Emerson certainly thought she had—that she wanted to be his lover. She held her breath. Waited for his response.
“Not a good idea for partners to sleep together. Emotional involvements can be dangerous.” Rough. Rumbling.
Heat burned her cheeks at the rejection. Her breath expelled. “I don’t think you’re dangerous to me.” Let it go, Emerson. The man just said no. He’s not interested. Gray changed his mind. Whatever. Let. It. Go.
He closed the distance between them. She tensed because, sure, he was probably planning another sneaky attack, and she truly didn’t want to hit that mat again. But he didn’t attack. Just stopped right before her. Towered over her.
Her head tipped back. Sometimes, she forgot just how big he was. Only now, his size was especially evident, particularly since she wasn’t wearing her trademark heels.
“I am more dangerous than you realize.” Deep and dark.
She swallowed. “If you changed your mind about us, that’s fine.
I get it. Heat of the moment and all of that.
” Under normal circumstances, she never, ever rambled.
Silence was her friend. She liked to listen.
Observe. Evaluate. This was not a normal circumstance, though, and she was rambling like mad.
“You don’t need to give me an explanation. You don’t have to say?—”
“I want to fuck you here and now.”
Oh. Well. Okay.
But he didn’t touch her. Just said those deep and hungry words. Just watched her with his intense, ever-so-dark eyes. Not gold. The darkness has spread.
“This had better not be another distraction technique,” she muttered. “I’d appreciate it if you’d say exactly what you mean to me. No games, for once.”
“I want to fuck you here and now,” he repeated.
There was rough longing in his voice. Savage desire.
She found herself leaning toward him. I want the same thing. Emerson opened her mouth to say those words.
“But that’s not going to happen.” Gray held his position.
“Why not?”
“Because me without control? That’s not something you want to see.”
Uh, yes, yes it was. She was more than eager to see?—
The workout room door flew open.
“Are you two sparring?” Rylan’s voice rang out. “Holy shit—uh, sorry, Agent Stone. I just, uh, didn’t think you ever sparred with anyone these days. Not unless it was your military buddies when they come in for some of those joint task force operations.” He bounded forward.
Emerson forced her gaze toward him. Rylan wore gray sweats. A blue t-shirt with FBI emblazoned across the chest.
“They are former Marines,” Gray said, his voice very careful and very flat. “And they give me a challenge, so I like sparring with them.”
“Is Emerson a challenge, too?” Rylan asked.
She didn’t like the mocking smile that he flashed her way. Careful. I will put you on your ass, Rylan.
“Yes, she is,” Gray responded. No mockery. Truth.
Her stare whipped back toward him.