Chapter 4 #3
She swallowed. They were hurtling through the dark, he’d just stolen a car to keep her safe, and she was as twisted up for him as she’d always been. Her problem, not his. “Thank you,” Delaney managed to say.
“What are you thanking me for now?”
“For helping me.” But, “Even if helping me is putting you in danger.”
He laughed. The sound was deep and rumbling and, yep, sexy. Most things about Nash were sexy, though. “My life is about danger,” he confessed. “That’s nothing new.”
Because he was a spy. She was still trying to wrap her head around that new truth. Back at the motel room, when he’d attacked the guy who’d broken into her room, Nash had moved with savage strength and power. “Are you involved in lots of life-and-death situations?”
“You have no idea.”
She’d take that as a yes.
“You can sleep,” he told her.
Um, doubtful. Adrenaline poured through her body.
“When you wake up, we’ll be at a safe house. I’d planned for us to head there at first light, but, seeing as how we were ratted out by the night clerk at our motel, our arrival at the safe house will just happen a little earlier than I originally anticipated.”
A safe house sounded like heaven to her. “Once we are there, I can talk to the authorities, and you can get back to your life.”
“Sure.” Flat. “My life.”
She bit her lower lip. There was something else they needed to talk about. Oh, who was she kidding? There were a million things they needed to address. But one very big elephant in the vehicle was taking up a whole lot of space. “Nash…”
“Getting turned on by you is as natural as breathing for me.”
She knew her eyes had just doubled in size. She’d been trying to think of a tactful way to bring up her reaction to him. A reaction that had not lessened in intensity, despite all of the years between them.
Every man she’d met since him had never compared. Nash had left too big of a mark on her.
“When we were pulling away from the diner and I pushed you down, that was probably not the best move,” Nash admitted.
Her brows rose. “Do tell.”
“Your mouth was close to my dick. You were on my thigh. No way my dick wasn’t going rock hard in that situation.”
Um, okay.
“But you are in no danger from me. I’m not going to jump you, Delaney.”
It was suddenly way too hot in the interior of the vehicle. “I didn’t say that you were.”
“I get that you’ve moved the hell on from me.”
Her hands fisted harder in her lap. Her nails bit into her palms.
“You were marrying someone else, for shit’s sake. Trust me, I get it.”
He did not get it. He had no idea how lonely she’d been.
How much she’d ached for him over the years.
How she’d missed the life that they could’ve had together.
“It’s been years. You’re not the same person you were before.
Neither am I.” Because you’re a spy. And that meant—what?
That he lied for a living? That he lied as easily as he breathed?
That he— “Have you ever killed anyone?” A question that blurted from her.
He cut a glance toward the rearview mirror. Automatically, she glanced back but only saw darkness behind their vehicle.
A heavy silence settled inside the SUV.
She cleared her throat. “Eventually, the owner of this vehicle will come out and realize that this ride isn’t in the lot. The owner will call the cops. An APB will be put out for the SUV.”
“I chose this vehicle because it was positioned with the others that belonged to the diner’s staff.”
How did he know that?
“Staff always park farther from the restaurant. Closer spaces are left for the patrons. Since it’s a staff car, odds are the owner won’t notice it’s missing until his shift ends. That gives us some breathing room.”
Breathing room, right.
“But don’t worry, we’ll take another ride before too long. We’ll switch things up to make it harder for anyone to track us.”
He definitely talked like he’d done this before. “What about your motorcycle? Don’t you think the cops will find it?”
“Got that taken care of. Someone I know in the area will make it vanish.”
She remembered him firing off a quick text after he’d parked the motorcycle. “That’s who you were texting? Your local contact?”
“Typhon is a very important individual. In fact, one of the most wanted targets out there, according to the agency. This is a big break—you are a big break.”
How fantastic. “Yay me.”
“What?”
“Nothing,” she mumbled. Her eyes squeezed shut. “You didn’t answer my question.”
“Which one?”
The big one. “Have you ever killed a person?”
The SUV seemed to accelerate even more. “Do you really want me to answer that?”
Goosebumps rose onto her arms. Her eyes opened. Her stare slid to him. “I think you just did.”
He grunted. “You were right when you said I am not the same person any longer.” His gaze cut to her. “I won’t make the same mistakes.”
What did that even mean?
“I fight hard. I fight dirty. I lie. I steal.”
Yes, obviously, because they were in a stolen vehicle at that exact moment.
“And, if it means keeping you safe, hell, yes, I’ll kill.
I won’t hesitate. If that scares you, I’m afraid that’s too bad.
” His stare was back on the road. His body tense.
His voice hard. Deep. “I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you alive.
You picked the wrong man to fall in love with, Delaney. But I will protect you from him.”
“I didn’t love Kurt.” There. Her deep, dark secret. “I tried, and I thought I should, back when I believed he was Prince Charming. I liked him.” She liked the lie that he’d been. “But…love?” Love wouldn’t have filled her with so much doubt.
“You were marrying a guy you didn’t love?” More anger.
“I thought it would come, with more time. Didn’t realize I didn’t have time and that I’d have a watery grave waiting in my immediate future.
This is certainly the kind of thing that will make a woman swear off relationships.
” She settled back against her seat and closed her eyes once more.
“I needed something. Someone.” How did she explain the hole she’d felt inside after her mother’s and grandfather’s deaths?
The way she’d ached and grieved? And then…
“Kurt swore he loved me. I was a fool for believing him.”
“We’re going to catch Kurt. We’re going to lock him away. He won’t hurt you or anyone else ever again.”
We. Did he mean the CIA? “I’m sure that someone will be assigned to my case.” Wasn’t that how things worked? “You can deliver me to the safe house, to your friends, and then you can go on your merry way.”
“My…merry way?” He seemed to choke on the words.
A yawn slipped from her. “Thanks for saving me,” Delaney said, her words slurring just a bit. “But I know you don’t want to be trapped with me any longer than is absolutely necessary. Drop me at the safe house and get back to the life that is waiting for you.”
She was asleep. He knew because her breathing had finally softened and eased up. She wouldn’t be able to sleep long. He’d have to wake her when they switched rides.
You don’t want to be trapped with me any longer than is absolutely necessary.
Delaney’s words whispered through his mind again, and a faint smile tugged at Nash’s lips. Oh, but she was wrong. Dead wrong. Because he intended to be trapped with her as long as possible.
He’d been telling the truth when he said that he wasn’t the same person she’d known before.
He would not make the same mistakes. And he would absolutely not let her slip through his fingers again.
Whatever he had to do, whatever rules he had to bend or just completely shatter, whatever it took—Nash was ready.
He would not lose Delaney again.
I will not screw up with her again.