Chapter 11
Chapter Eleven
The giant, black truck was coming at her too fast. Music blared from the interior even as the engine growled, and Esme knew that she was not going to make it to the little girl in time. Or, even if she did make it, the truck was going to hit her. She and the girl would both die. The mother was close, screaming because she’d realized what was happening, but it was too late. Far too late.
The heat from the truck lanced over her, and it was almost like a fire.
Like a bomb.
Like—
Esme jerked awake. Her eyes flew open even as her breath heaved in and out. In and out. Because her heart raced so hard, she automatically put a hand to her chest. The sheet tangled between her fingers, and it took her a moment to process just where she was and what was happening.
The bedroom of the safe house.
Just a nightmare. That’s all. A nightmare. Because the little girl was okay. The truck hadn’t hit either of them. Everything is fine. Fine.
And…Esme was a world-class liar.
She stared up at the dark ceiling even as her heart continued to race. She’d totally lied to Tyler’s face. When she’d run for the little girl, Esme had only been focused on getting to her. Saving her. Not seeing a kid die right in front of her mom.
She’s not dead. She’s okay. You did one good thing, Esme.
And her mother’s voice drifted through her mind…
Start each day with one good deed.
Good deeds had just always been so hard for her. It was the wicked deeds that came easier.
Thus, the naked stroll in front of Tyler. The lie to his face because she’d heard what he said to Clay. As if she hadn’t already known that the man was playing her. No way that a guy like Tyler would ever really want her. Not for more than some hot and dirty sex, anyway. The forever kind of want? Not happening. He wouldn’t end up with a master criminal.
And she wouldn’t end up with some morally upright and uptight marshal. Vanilla, indeed.
But she did lean over the side of the bed. Peek down at the floor. Because Tyler wasn’t sleeping downstairs that night. He’d taken a pillow and an extra blanket and he’d bunked down right beside her. She squinted at his shadowy form, trying to make him out in the darkness.
“Did you have a bad dream, sweetheart?”
“Mon Dieu!” Her whole body jolted.
“You’re not supposed to slip into French, remember?”
Her heartbeat had gone right back to galloping. “You’re not supposed to try scaring me to death, either.”
“I wasn’t trying to scare you. I was trying to check on you. You gasped a few moments ago. Then you were almost falling on top of me. I thought it seemed appropriate to ask if you were okay.”
How was his voice so calm and controlled? How was he always in perfect control? Something that drove her crazy. “I wasn’t falling on top of you.” A sniff. “I was checking to make sure you were all right. I thought I heard you cry out. As if you’d had a nightmare.”
“Can’t have a nightmare if you haven’t been to sleep yet.”
She peered down at him again. Her hair slid forward. “Why haven’t you been to sleep?”
“Because this drop-dead sexy woman I know flashed her curvy ass at me and made my dick so hard that sleep is a bit difficult.” Rough. Not as calm. A little ragged around the edges.
“Oh.” Her mouth had gone dry. She swallowed. Twice. Didn’t really help the dryness.
“Uh, huh. So, why don’t you lean back in bed? Go back to sleep.”
She didn’t lean back. She might have leaned forward a little more. Definitely hanging half off the bed now. Possibly in danger of falling down on him.
“If you don’t want to go back to sleep,” Tyler added gruffly, “you could always tell me about your bad dream.”
“What bad dream?” she asked.
Deep, rumbling laughter came from him. “You really think I can’t see through your lies?”
She certainly hoped he could not. She worked extremely hard to make sure that no one could see through her.
“Hate to break it to you, sweetness, but I can see you for exactly who you are. ”
Sweetheart. Darling. Sweetness. He certainly used a variety of endearments. None of which he actually meant. Instead, when he thought of her, she knew he thought… “A criminal mastermind.”
“Like that’s all you are.”
So he hadn’t denied the charge.
“But there’s more to you than that,” he surprised her by adding. “In my experience, people are very rarely just one thing in this world. Hell, even serial killers have families. A man who has killed four people could still be the most devoted father you ever saw. A guy who goes to every soccer game that his son has. Never misses a family dinner.”
It took her a moment to actually be able to speak. “Are you comparing me to a serial killer?” Just so they were clear.
“Nah. Because you aren’t evil.”
Her breath rushed out. “Well, that’s something, I suppose. But, please, try not to overwhelm me with your fancy compliments.” He doesn’t think you’re a serial killer, so, that’s something. Something crappy.
“It’s like armor, isn’t it, Esme? The way you just toss out your flippant comments to disarm and distract people.”
She heard the faint rustle of the blanket below her. When she strained her eyes, she was pretty sure that she could see that he’d shifted around a bit. Were his hands behind his head now as he just relaxed and stared up at her and absolutely picked her world apart?
“Are you scared for people to see the real you, Esme?”
“Didn’t realize I’d wake up and stumble into a late-night psychological evaluation. If I’d known that, I would have stuck to my nightmare.” She flopped back on the bed. Pulled the covers up to her chin and glared at the ceiling.
His soft laughter followed her. “Hardly a psych evaluation, but I think I am getting a pretty good handle on the real you.”
No, you’re not. “Do tell.” Don’t. Don’t say anything else, would you?
“How about we start with this? You had no clue if you could get to the girl in time.”
Esme swallowed. She also didn’t deny his words. How could she? They were dead accurate. Dead. Terrible key word.
“You didn’t know if the truck would stop or if it would roll right over you. See, you didn’t have time to think about all of that stuff. No way in hell did you have time to think about it.”
That had sounded like real anger breaking through in his voice. Esme rolled onto her side, but she did not poke her head over the edge of the bed again.
“I heard the mother talking to Clay. She said she looked up, saw her daughter going back for the teddy bear, and she could barely even get out a scream. Her daughter was too close to the truck.”
Esme blinked quickly. In the dark, he wouldn’t be able to see that her eyes had just filled with tears. Not that he could see her, anyway, not from her position. Because she’d hidden herself from him. I hide from everyone.
“You just ran out to grab her, didn’t you?” Tyler continued, relentless. “With no other thought except that a kid was going to die. You saw the girl. You saw the truck. And you knew you were the only one close enough to save her. But you didn’t know if you could both get away from the truck in time.”
“What can I say?” Soft. Mocking because that was all she could afford to be. “You should probably start calling me a hero. Maybe the town will throw me a parade. ”
Silence.
I hate the silence. Hate it. At first, when she’d woken in that private hospital, it had been all she knew. She’d seen people talking. Seen their mouths moving. But there had been nothing for her to hear.
Then, after days—weeks—she’d heard what sounded like the ocean. A dull roar in her ears. It had shaken her nerves even as it both gave her hope and terrified her.
She would always hate silence. Esme scrambled for something to say. “Any word on the dead hitman?”
“No.”
Well, okay, that had hardly been a conversation starter.
The silence came again. Dammit. “Tyler…”
“Tell me about your nightmare.”
She didn’t want to do that. “Why don’t you tell me about one of yours?” Now she did poke her head over the bed once more. Almost as if she couldn’t help herself. Because she couldn’t. “Mr. Big, Bad U.S. Marshal. Surely you have the occasional nightmare, too? You tell me yours, and I’ll tell you mine.”
“You trying to find out what I fear so that you can manipulate me?”
“Well, no.” She hadn’t been. “I actually didn’t realize you feared anything.”
“We’re all afraid of something. Even tough talking, sexy-as-hell con artists and criminal masterminds.”
“You say the sweetest things.” Her teeth snapped together.
“I fear walking out of a damn grocery store, holding fucking chocolate chips, and finding you dead on the pavement.” Flat.
She shivered.
“I fear running to you and turning you over only to see that you have blood all over you. That your bones are broken and smashed. And that your eyes—the most gorgeous eyes I’ve ever seen in my life—are closed. That they will always be closed. Because you left me. Because I didn’t do my one job. I didn’t protect you. I fear fucking up and losing you. ”
Wow. That had been surprisingly deep. She pushed a little more off the bed because she wanted to see him so badly.
He grabbed her. His hands flew up, curled around her, and in the next instant, she was tumbling right off that bed and into his arms. Her breath left her in a rush even as her body collided with his.
“I fear something happening to you,” he rasped.
Her upper body pressed against his powerful chest. Her legs straddled his hips, and there was no missing the hard, thrusting proof of his arousal. His hands remained curled around her shoulders.
“I fear you dying on my watch when there isn’t a damn thing I can do to protect you.” His hands slid down. Moved to curl around her hips.
Her hands pressed into the floor on either side of him, and she lifted up just enough that she could peer down at his face. “You’re really good at protection,” she murmured. She wanted his mouth.
No, I want him.
“And you’re good at breaking my control,” he returned in a tone that made a shiver slide over her body.
And with that, his mouth took hers. He closed the last bit of distance between them. His mouth pressed to hers. His tongue thrust inside. He tasted her. He took. He commanded a response.
A flood of need burst through her. Her emotions—already so tightly wound—seemed to explode. Leftover adrenaline? Fear? Who cared what it was? Suddenly, her nails were biting into him even as a moan stirred in her throat. She’d crawled into bed naked. A taunt to him. And when he’d pulled her off that bed, she’d still been naked. Her hips rocked against his thick dick, and the only thing separating them was the blanket he’d been using.
And—as she discovered when her hand slid down between them—his jeans.
Why did the man still have on his jeans? She could help him ditch those. Her mouth pulled from his as she pushed herself up. The move just had her hips rubbing harder against his cock. Her breath seemed way too loud as it heaved in and out.
Darkness.
She couldn’t see him clearly.
But she could feel her own arousal. Just from a kiss, and she’d gotten wet for him. Her breasts ached. She wanted Tyler to touch them. To tease her nipples. To touch her, everywhere. But she also had no intention of being the man’s regret come morning.
Her hands splayed across his chest. Her traitorous hips might have been arching against him. “Is this the part,” her voice was too husky, “where you’re going to tell me that if we have sex, it will change nothing?”
“Esme.”
“Because I can beat you to that point.” Her chin lifted even as she still tasted him. “It will mean nothing. It will change nothing. Just hot, dirty sex in the dark.”
His hands were curled around her waist. Holding tightly. “Wrong.”
Wait, what ?
He lifted her up. Moved with that casual, powerful strength of his, and in the next second, she found herself on the bed again. She bounced and stared up at his shadowy form as he towered over the side of the bed. No, as he towered over her. Her fingers flew out and grabbed for a sheet. Too dark for him to see her, but the man had just rejected her in record time, so no way did she want to be naked in front of him. Darkness or not. “Change your mind already? The good guy just can’t stand the thought of fucking the bad girl?” Mocking. Maybe. Maybe there was also a hint of pain beneath her words.
“Oh, I can stand the thought. In fact, it’s basically all I could think about for the last three hours while you slept. Especially after that little strip show before you climbed into bed. You want me?”
Yes.
“Then I am absolutely going to fuck you.” A savage promise. “But it will change everything.”
A tremble of fear might have gone through her heart.
“You think I’ll fuck you once and walk away?”
She actually hadn’t thought beyond the immediate fuck. Or…yes, I have thought beyond it. I know he’ll have to walk away eventually.
“Not happening. You’re going to be mine, Esme. I protect what’s mine.”
Her tongue swiped over her lips. “I thought you already were protecting me.”
“Because you’re already mine. You just didn’t fucking know it. You will now. Before I’m done, there will be no doubt.” And he caught her legs. He pulled them to the side of the bed. Pulled her there. “I’ve been dying to taste what’s mine. ”
Her lips parted in surprise.
Then he put his mouth on her. Right where she ached the most for him. He devoured her.