Chapter Seventeen #3
“He grabbed me and tried to kiss me, saying that we might as well act on our feelings since Thomas and Robert clearly did. I pushed him away but he laughed and said I’d only resisted because I didn’t yet know I wanted him.
He said he understood the coldness of my marriage and that he could provide what Robert could not.
” Her voice broke. “He frightened me. And disgusted me.”
The muscle in James’s jaw jumped. “Did he—”
“No. Not that night. I managed to get away. I told Robert the next day, and he told Julian never to return. This was only a month before Robert was killed.” She took a shuddering breath.
“Julian came to the funeral, pushing himself on me once again. I begged Thomas to keep him away from me, which he did. I left for Brighton after that, hoping Julian wouldn’t know where I was, but he found out. Somehow, he always knows where I am.”
James began to pace, his movements sharp and controlled, like a predator in a cage.
“Julian’s never fully left my life. He’s written to me, asking for an opportunity to court me now that Robert’s gone.
Countless letters. I never answer. I’ve stopped reading them and now just toss them into the fire.
I was hopeful that he would not know where I went after I left Brighton.
Yet, once again he found me. He has written to me twice since I’ve been at Ashford Manor. ”
“Twice?” James’s voice was lethal. “You burned those letters in front of me. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I was ashamed. And afraid.”
“Afraid of what?”
“That if I’m too unkind to him, he’ll tell everyone about his brother and Robert. If he exposed his brother’s secret life, he would become the heir. And I wouldn’t care if it was just me that would be exposed, but it’s Cecily. If this gets out, it could ruin her chances of a good match.”
James stopped pacing and turned to face her, his eyes blazing. “Let me understand this correctly. This bastard assaulted you, has been stalking you for over a year, and you’ve been handling it alone because you’re worried about protecting his brother’s secret?”
“When you put it like that—”
“That’s exactly how it is.” His voice was cold as winter steel. “He’s a predator, Georgiana. And he’s been hunting you.”
She felt tears prick her eyes. “I don’t know what to do to get rid of him. I’m so tired, James. So tired of carrying all this weight.”
James crossed the room in three quick strides and sat beside her on the settee, gathering her hands in his. “You’re not alone anymore. I’m going to end this.”
“What will you do?”
“Whatever it takes.” The promise in his voice was absolute. “He’ll never touch you again. Never threaten you again. I’ll make sure of it.”
“But how? You can’t be with me every second. And he’ll be at all the balls—”
“Then I’ll be at all the balls too. I’ll shadow you so closely he’ll never get near you.” His thumb traced across her knuckles. “And if he tries anything, anything at all, I’ll destroy him.”
The fierce protectiveness in his voice sent warmth flooding through her. “You’d do that? For me?”
“Georgiana.” He lifted their joined hands and pressed his lips to her knuckles. “I’d do anything for you.”
The air between them crackled with tension. She could see the want in his eyes, could feel it in the way his thumb continued to stroke across her skin. She leaned closer, drawn by the warmth and safety he represented.
“James…”
He cupped her face with his free hand, his thumb brushing across her cheek. “You’re so beautiful. So brave.” His voice was rough with emotion. “I want—”
But then he stopped, pulling back slightly even as his eyes remained locked on hers.
“No.” He dropped his hands and stood abruptly, putting distance between them. “Not like this.”
“What?” Confusion and hurt flooded through her.
He ran a hand through his hair, his breathing unsteady. “You’re upset and vulnerable. You’ve just told me about the worst thing that’s happened to you, and I won’t take advantage of that.”
“You wouldn’t be taking advantage—”
“Wouldn’t I?” He turned to face her, and she saw the struggle in his expression.
“You’re seeking comfort, protection. And God knows I want to give you both.
But when I…” He swallowed hard. “When we come together, it should be because you want me, not because you need someone to chase away the shadows.”
Her heart clenched at the nobility in his words, even as her body ached for his touch. “And if I said I wanted you anyway?”
“Then I’d ask you to tell me again tomorrow. When Julian Fane isn’t lurking in your thoughts. When you can be certain it’s really me you want, and not just safety.”
The restraint was clearly costing him—she could see it in the tension of his shoulders, in the way his hands clenched at his sides. But he held firm.
“You deserve better than a man who would take advantage of your fear,” he said quietly. “You deserve someone who will wait until you’re sure.”
Tears spilled down her cheeks, but they weren’t tears of sadness. They were tears of gratitude, of recognition. Here was a man who could have what he wanted but chose to protect her from her own vulnerability instead.
“Thank you,” she whispered.
He nodded once, sharp and decisive. “Go to bed, Georgiana. Tomorrow we’ll start planning how to keep you safe.”
She stood on unsteady legs and moved toward the door, pausing on the threshold. “James?”
“Yes?”
“Tomorrow I’ll still want you.”
She left him standing there, and as she climbed the stairs, she heard him release a shuddering breath that told her how much his restraint had cost him.