Chapter 23 #3
"Plus all the charity work you've done over the years," Amy added. "Event planning, donor relations, volunteer coordination. That's all transferable to paid work."
We brainstormed possibilities while eating lunch. Marketing for cultural organizations. Development work for educational nonprofits. Executive assistant positions that could provide a steady income while I figured out longer-term career goals.
"I know it sounds crazy," I said, "but I'm actually excited about the possibility of having a job again. Having my own money, my own professional identity, my own reason to get dressed in the morning that doesn't involve managing someone else's needs."
"It doesn't sound crazy," Robin said. "It sounds like you're finally waking up after twenty-three years of sleepwalking through someone else's life."
"Speaking of which," Robin continued, her tone shifting to something more personal, "I've decided to postpone my Manhattan apartment search. At least until your situation stabilizes."
I looked at her with surprise. Robin had been planning her trial separation for months, researching neighborhoods and rental prices with the determination of someone who'd finally decided to choose herself over a marriage that wasn't worth saving.
"You don't need to do that," I said. "Your separation plans are just as important as my divorce drama."
"David and I aren't going anywhere. We're both too comfortable with our misery to change anything quickly.
" Robin's expression showed the wry acceptance of someone who'd recognized her marriage was dead but hadn't found the energy to bury it yet.
"But you need support right now. You need friends who understand what you're going through. "
"I do need that," I admitted. "More than I expected."
Amy nodded. "Richard's been asking questions about you. Wanting to know if you're 'okay' and whether I think you're handling the divorce 'appropriately.' Like he's gathering intelligence for Brett."
"What did you tell him?"
"That you're handling everything exactly how someone should when they discover their husband has been living a double life for years.
" Amy said, making me thankful for friends who were willing to take sides when taking sides was necessary.
"And that if he's so concerned about appropriate behavior, maybe he should examine his own conduct before judging yours. "
I looked at these women who'd been watching my marriage implode from the front row, who'd supported my decision to fight back instead of accepting betrayal, and felt something I hadn't experienced in months.
Optimism. Not about my marriage, which was over, but about the possibility that I could build a life that belonged entirely to me.
"I know this is probably going to sound strange," I said, "but I think I'm going to be okay. Different than I was, but okay. Maybe better than okay."
"You're going to be amazing," Robin said, raising her coffee cup in a toast to whatever came next. "You're going to remember who you were before you became so focused on being the ideal wife that you forgot you were a person worth being excited about."
That evening, I cooked dinner for Devin while thinking about work possibilities and financial independence and the strange relief that came from discovering your husband was even worse than you'd realized.
At least now I knew exactly what I was fighting against instead of trying to save something that had never been real in the first place.
My phone rang while I was cleaning up the kitchen. Hannah's name on the screen, calling at seven-thirty with information that probably couldn't wait until business hours.
"Mrs. Holmes, your husband has been transferring marital assets for two years," she said. "But I found something interesting. He made one mistake that could cost him everything."
I set down the dish towel and gave her my complete attention. "What sort of mistake?"
"He used his personal Social Security number on several of the corporate entities he established to hide income. That creates a legal connection between his undisclosed assets and his sworn financial statements. In Connecticut, that's not just perjury. It's criminal fraud."
Criminal fraud. Brett's financial deception had crossed the line from marital betrayal into behavior that prosecutors might decide deserved jail time.
"What does that mean in practice?"
"It means your husband may have committed felonies to hide money from your marriage," Hannah said, with the satisfaction of someone who'd spent weeks unraveling lies and finally found evidence that could destroy the person who'd created them.
"And it means we have leverage that could end this divorce very quickly and very favorably. "
I hung up feeling like I'd been given weapons I'd never known existed in the war my husband had been waging against our marriage for years. Brett had been so confident in his ability to manipulate and control that he'd been careless about covering his tracks.
Now his carelessness was going to cost him everything he'd thought he was protecting.