Chapter 25 #2
“Most of the time. It’s harder when the season first starts, which is in August, and it’s still full-blown fire season around here.
Since I’m not working on Fridays at the moment, I should be able to go.
But when I’m on shift? We just bring the engine and watch by the sidelines in case we get a call.
One time a car caught on fire in the parking lot, and everyone was glad we were already there. We put it out quick,” I explain.
She sips from her drink, never taking her eyes off me. “I love hearing the stories about what happens around here. They’re all so . . . quaint.”
“It’s just small-town life.” I never really thought about it before. How corny we must all look and sound. But the way TV and movies portray the life of a small town is pretty dead-on.
“Can I ask you a personal question?” She takes a bigger gulp from her drink, like she needs it for courage.
“Go for it.”
“Why don’t you date anyone? Like, you should have a girlfriend. A wife and a bunch of kids.” She laughs, but she sounds uncomfortable, and it stops as quickly as it started. “That was probably way too personal of an observation.”
I sit up straighter, realizing I just need to tell her everything and get it over with. “Are you asking what happened to Dottie’s mom?”
“That too. I just—I’m curious. You’re a catch, Wyatt McKinney. And I can’t believe that no woman in this community has got you nailed down by now.” She covers her eyes for a moment, then drops her hands. “I can’t believe I said that.”
“I’ll take it all as a compliment.” Clearing my throat, I launch into my story.
“We were high school sweethearts, Cheryl and I. Started dating like halfway through our senior year and just stayed together afterward. She went to community college, and I started as a seasonal firefighter. Worked my way up the ranks fairly quickly, and when we were twenty-two, we found out we were pregnant. Cheryl was pretty upset about it, but I was all in. It felt like it was happening fast, but I was ready to be a father. Ready to be responsible. I had some money saved and bought us a house. Nothing fancy, more like a fixer-upper, but it was mine and I was proud of it.”
My parents wouldn’t let me put it in mine and Cheryl’s name—they provided the down payment, and I paid them back within a couple of years. They worried that, since we weren’t married, it could get messy if we split up. I was pissed they put that condition on me, but their foresight was spot-on.
Rachel nods, encouraging me to keep going.
“After Dottie was born, Cheryl had little interest in her. Felt like I took care of her more than she did. When I came home from my shifts, she’d practically shove the baby in my arms and take off with her friends.
I found out later she was spending time with only one friend, and it was a guy.
Her ex-boyfriend, who was a couple years older than us. ”
“I’m so sorry,” Rachel murmurs.
“It’s fine. It’s whatever. She got into drugs with this guy.
She was coming home less and less, and I’d always have to rely on my mom to take care of Dot.
It was rough. Cheryl and I would get in these raging fights, and then one day, she told me in the middle of a particularly nasty shouting match that she was going to move out, and I told her good.
I wanted her gone. She packed all her shit right in front of us and left.
Didn’t even kiss Dottie goodbye. That’s how much she cared. She hasn’t been back since.”
“You don’t know what happened to her?”
I slowly shake my head. “Don’t really care either.
It used to matter more to me, where Cheryl might be, especially after everything that happened.
I worried for Dottie. But as time went on and the distance grew further, I realized I don’t want her back.
Ever. We’ve survived just fine without her, and for Cheryl to show up out of the blue and try to take Dottie back?
At the very least, try to gain partial custody?
I think Dottie would freak out. She doesn’t know her. Not at all.”
“Do you have legal custody?”
“Yeah, my parents suggested I should get it, and we had a custody hearing. The hearing notice was sent to her last known address, but Cheryl didn’t show up.
I was granted full custody of Dot.” I try to smile, but I feel too grim to manage it.
It’s never fun talking about the one part of my life that’s a giant mess. “And that’s really . . . it.”
I can feel my shoulders slump, and I reach for my glass of water, draining it. I always feel this way after I talk about Cheryl and our backstory: drained.
“I’m not a mother, but I can’t imagine just . . . leaving my little girl,” Rachel admits.
“Pretty sure she was addicted to drugs. That’s what had her acting so different.
It’s hard to think about anything else but yourself when you’re going through something like that.
” I’m making excuses for Cheryl. I tend to do that.
It’s not that I’m defending her, more like I’m trying to figure out why she did the things she did.
What motivated her? What made it so easy for her to walk away from us?
“Did you two get married?”
“No, thank God. My mom always disapproved of that prior to Dottie’s birth, but the moment Cheryl was gone, Mom would always say she was glad I didn’t marry her.”
The server arrives with our food, and she sets our plates in front of us, asking if we need anything else.
Rachel asks for refills for both of us, and when the server is gone, she leans over the table, sending me a sweet smile.
“Let’s talk about something else, hmm? I can tell that took a lot out of you. ”
I nod, relieved. I hope she doesn’t think I’m stuck on Cheryl or wish she were around, because there is nowhere else that I’d rather be than here tonight. With this woman.