Chapter 32
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
JACKSON
“Don’t let it drop on that end!” Tucker called, his voice seeming disembodied behind the wall of foam and fabric that separated us.
“I’ve got it!” I grunted back, pressing my face into the mattress as an extra means of support while we shuffled our way up the back porch steps. “You know, when I told you I wanted to be face down in the mattress for you, I didn’t mean it like this!”
A low, rumbly chuckle came from my man as we inched our way through the back door.
“You need to be careful what you wish for, Sunshine,” Tucker teased, his voice sounding so open and free.
The use of the new nickname he’d been calling me pinballed around inside my chest cavity, stirring up all sorts of emotions, but only the good ones.
It’d been a week since Tucker had called me after his session, and remembering the sheer vulnerability dripping off him when he’d walked right into my arms still made my heart squeeze just thinking about it.
When he’d gotten out of his truck, those whiskey-colored eyes were red-rimmed and watery, but there’d been something underneath those unshed tears I hadn’t been able to place.
But then what I was seeing hit me like a freight train.
Resolve.
It shifted the energy around him in a way I wouldn’t have noticed if I hadn’t been there to witness both sides of him.
Tucker’s grief had weighed him down like a physical entity clinging to his back, but somewhere between when he’d left for his appointment and when he’d come home, that weight had started to lift.
Maybe it’d been that his perception of what his grief represented changed, or it simply could have been he finally accepted he was ready to move on.
Either way, the man I loved had looked lighter as he sought me out for comfort.
“Before I can start fucking you into the mattress, we need to get said mattress into the house!” Tucker’s voice came again, pulling me from my thoughts, and I couldn’t help but grin.
I’d been spending more nights at Tucker’s place ever since he began going to grief counseling, but it wasn’t until after his last session that he decided it was time to change out the bed.
The mattress had been over ten years old when Raleigh had passed, so Tucker had been well over-due for a change, but he hadn’t been ready.
Hopefully he’d have better quality sleep on this new one.
His insomnia was slowly getting better. There hadn’t been any more dreams of Raleigh since the last one, at least not to my knowledge.
After what his therapist had spoken with him about, I could tell his entire outlook on his dreams had changed.
He still struggled—caught between wanting to see Raleigh again and wanting to move forward—but every day seemed to be better than the last. And I couldn’t deny how fucking nice it was to wake with him in my arms.
It took us another five minutes of maneuvering, full of squatting and twisting ourselves in awkward positions to get the king-sized bed through the backdoor, followed by another round of us squabbling back and forth as we got it into Tucker’s room.
“Oh my god…” I groaned, flopping down face-first onto the unmade mattress after we’d gotten it into the frame. “That did not need to be as complicated as you made it.”
Tucker scoffed, and I felt the bed dip as he sat down on the other side from me.
“You’re going to be thanking me in ten years for making sure you lift things with your legs instead of your back.
All these guys are going to be complaining of back pain like old men, and you’ll be out there feeling like a million bucks. ”
My grin spread over my lips as my stomach fluttered, and I rolled my head to the side to glance up at him. “Won’t really matter if you’re following through on blowing out my back on a regular basis.”
“Fuck you. Stop making jokes you don’t plan to follow through on.” He huffed as his lips tilted upward in what was undeniably a smile, and it only made my own become impossibly wider.
“Who ever said it was a joke?” I laughed, knowing full well if he ever wanted that from me, I’d be more than willing. Despite my teasing though, his words hit a soft spot in my heart, and I shifted onto my back with my gaze still fixed on him.
“Ten years from now, huh?” I said casually a few moments later, lifting my arms to rest behind my head.
The corners of Tucker’s eyes softened as he nodded, not needing me to elaborate. “Yeah. Longer, maybe, if you don’t get tired of me before then.”
“I don’t even think that’s possible,” I breathed, suddenly struck by the sincerity shimmering in those gorgeous, amber-colored eyes. “I… I didn’t know you were thinking about a future for us.”
Tucker let out a slow breath as he leaned back on his hands, looking up at the ceiling as if collecting his thoughts.
“I told you that before you showed up, I couldn’t even consider my future.
I was living second by second pretty reluctantly.
But then you came to Juniper Grove and… I don’t know.
Suddenly I was thinking about getting to see you the next morning, and then what your week would look like.
When you talked about staying here permanently, I could picture it, and it just felt so right.
Even before things between us changed, you being here felt right. ”
My pulse thrummed in my chest as he talked, but when his eyes met mine, it was like all the oxygen in my lungs was sucked away. I’d never seen him look so at peace before.
“So if I’m being honest, I’ve always been thinking of a future with you,” he said softly.
Emotion sat high in my throat as he looked down on me with the gentlest expression, and before my brain could catch up to what my body was doing, I was already sitting up to wrap my hand around the back of his neck to pull him toward me.
He came easily, letting out an appreciative sound when our lips crashed into each other, and I drank it down. Our kisses were tender and unhurried at first, each one sending little shivers down my spine, and I fell into the bliss of it till Tucker shifted.
His tongue slid along the seam of my lips, seeking entry that I happily gave.
The soft noise he made as our tongues met, swirling and gliding along each other in an erotic dance, had something igniting inside my blood.
Kissing him felt so fucking good, but even more than that, it felt like coming home.
All at once, it was like there was too much space between us, and I tugged at his hip, urging him to roll his body on top of me.
My legs fell open naturally, making space for him as he moved to rest his weight on me.
A deep, guttural groan resounded in my chest at how perfect he felt against me when his hips slotted against mine.
Everything inside me lit up at having Tucker against me as our kisses got messier and more passionate, teeth and lips clashing.
Fingers skimming up his sides, I slipped under the hem of his shirt to run them along his warm skin.
He let out a low, rumbly moan that went straight to my balls and had my hands roaming up further.
Tucker hissed when I found the stiff peaks of his nipples, rolling and pinching them between my fingers. I kissed along his jaw as he panted, his hot breath sending sparks of electricity through every nerve ending.
“Mmm, fuck, baby,” I growled into his neck when he began to rut our erections against each other through our jeans.
Being with Tucker was somehow overwhelming and never enough, all at the same time.
It was like my need for him could never be satiated and right now, all I wanted was to have my hands all over him.
To be inside him, to hear him scream my name, to watch him fall apart in the best way from the pleasure I gave him.
Pulling away just a little, we maneuvered so we were both more upright, giving me space to work Tucker’s shirt off with his help. My mouth crashed against his chest before the fabric was even fully over his head, and he let out a shuddering gasp as I sucked at his dusky pink nipple.
My eyes flicked up to his, those gorgeous amber eyes molten and pupils blown wide as he chewed his lower lip. I laved my tongue over the raised bud while one of my hands came up to resume my earlier ministrations against his other nipple.
Quiet little murmurs of pleasure tumbled from his lips as I worked him over, his fingers skating over my neck and shoulders with blunt nails, which caused goosebumps to break out all over my skin.
Tucker shifted forward, straddling my hips to drop his ass down onto my dick and grind in a way that had me seeing stars.
I grunted in approval as I pulled away from his chest as I used one hand to pull him back into a searing kiss while the other gripped his hip.
The friction against my dick was tantalizing but hardly enough, and from the needy sounds that escaped from Tucker in between our kisses, I knew I wasn’t the only one wanting more.
It took me no time at all to pop open his jeans, a pleased hum spilling from me when I noticed the prominent wet spot on his boxer briefs.
“Look at you, leaking all over for me,” I murmured, snaking a hand in to palm at his covered cock. Tucker gave a low moan in response, rocking into my touch, and I couldn’t hold back my smirk. “So fucking needy. I love seeing you like this.”
“Fuck, Jackson… I want…” He groaned, spreading his legs as far as his jeans would allow so he could arch into my touch. But I could give him so much more, and he knew it.
“Yeah? What do you want, baby?” I looked up into the deep sea of lust swirling in his whiskey-colored eyes. His chest heaved with his breaths, and his lower lip snagged between his teeth as he continued to buck against my hand.
“You know…”
“Do I?” I teased, my grin widening as his brows pulled together into a scowl. “There are so many options, Tucker. You need to be specific so I can give you exactly what you need.”