47. Fox
FORTY-SEVEN
FOX
T raining had gone well, and E had been happy snapping photos.
We grabbed some food for everyone on the way home.
It was a great night, ending with E and me taking Rosalie in a bubble bath while Enzo and Cole went out to meet with someone.
I had no doubt in my mind that Enzo would most likely kill someone tonight because some product had gone missing.
Rosalie’s face showed her concern, and I hated that she even had to worry about this stupid shit. To take her mind off it all, we fucked her in the bath before taking her back to the bed, where I watched E make sweet love to her as was his way.
Finally, they both fell asleep while I stared at Rosalie’s ceiling. My phone buzzed on the nightstand, so I grabbed it and checked the message from Cole.
Cole: We’re going to be late. It’s not going well. Enzo got a name. You know he’s a fucking dog with a bone and won’t stop until we have this prick with the sticky fingers.
Fox: Do you need me to help?
I prayed he’d say no. I hated being anywhere near any of that shit. I’d do it, but I definitely wasn’t going to enjoy it.
Cole: No. We’re fine. Enzo has a few guys coming, and Emilio is on his way. Don’t wait up.
I sighed and let my phone sit on my abdomen as I thought about how fucked this life was.
How much I hated it. If I didn’t use Matteo’s coin, I’d likely head off to the NFL.
Leaving Rosalie behind wasn’t an option.
Either I turned down any offers, or I died to save her.
She’d never let me turn down the offer, and as Enzo’s wife, he’d never let her go with me.
It was all still weighing heavily on me.
So far, I was still willing to die. It seemed like the best way to get her out of here. She’d hurt for a while, but Anson would take her in a heartbeat. I knew it. Not only had he promised, but he loved her. He wasn’t ever going to stay gone for long, that much I knew.
My phone buzzed again. I silently prayed that it wasn’t Cole with bad news. I picked it up and stared down at a message from Anson.
Anson: Can you meet me tonight?
I frowned at his message. It was already past ten.
Fox: Yeah. Where? Everything OK?
Anson: My place. I just want to talk.
I glanced over to Rosalie. She was nestled up with E.
She’d sleep all night, providing that neither of them had a nightmare.
It had been a long time since she’d had one, and E hadn’t had one since his mood had improved.
He’d started seeing a therapist once a week, so I figured that was helping.
He didn’t like talking about it, so we didn’t push it.
I was grateful he was working on things.
The fact that I was going to die to save Rosalie let me know he very well could spiral. I had faith Cole and Enzo would keep him safe, though. I fucking prayed for it. And hell. Maybe he’d leave with Anson and Rosalie. That would be the perfect way for shit to end.
I got up and dressed before leaving the bedroom. I grabbed my leather jacket, gun, and keys and headed to my Jeep. Once inside, I started it and headed out, waving to the guards at the gate. Within minutes, I was standing on Anson’s stoop and knocking at his door.
He pulled it open, looking a hell of a lot better than he’d looked last night, but anything was an improvement on that.
“Come in,” he said, stepping aside for me.
I stepped into his space. He gestured for me to take a seat. I did so, wondering where the hell this conversation was headed.
“Do you want a drink?” he asked.
“Uh, no. I’m driving,” I said.
“I meant water. I can get some out of the tap.”
I frowned at that. Rosalie said he didn’t have fuck all for food in this place.
“No, man. I’m good.”
He settled in a chair and stared at me.
“I’m sorry for last night. I was fucked up and stupid. In fact, I’m humiliated you guys had to witness any of that, especially Rosalie. I-I don’t know how to say I’m sorry but know I am. Her getting that call.” He visibly swallowed. “I wish I’d have just stayed home.”
I nodded. “I get it. You’re hurting. I went through similar when I thought I lost her too.”
“Is she OK? Does she hate me more now?” His blue eyes looked so sad that it made me shift in my seat.
“She’s fine. She’s never hated you. I doubt she ever will. She’s hurt and confused by you ghosting her, but that’s it.”
He scrubbed his hand down his face and swore softly.
“I left to save you, Fox. I left to give her happiness. I didn’t want to interfere. It was a two birds, one stone sort of situation. If I weren’t involved, there would be no more fights about me, and you’d stick around for her.”
“Anson, I already made up my mind, and you gave me your word. My plan is still happening.”
He snapped his attention to me, a muscle throbbing along his jaw.
“You’re a fucking idiot. You don’t realize the damage something like this will do.”
“I do, but in the end, only she matters. I love the guys. I worry about E the most, but I know the guys will keep him safe. I’m doing it,” I said gently.
“Why?” He shook his head at me. “You do this, you’ll crush her. Then you leave me with the knowledge of it. If she ever found out I knew, she’d hate me.”
“Then make sure she never knows.”
“You’re asking me to lie to someone I love,” he snapped at me.
I swallowed hard at his words. “If you love her like you say you do, then you’ll save her.”
He raked his fingers through his hair and stared at his feet. “This is fucked up.”
“I know,” I murmured.
“When are you going to do it?” He finally looked at me.
“I don’t know. I guess I’m waiting to see what will happen. Maybe I won’t have to, but Enzo keeps digging us in deeper. If things get worse, it could be any day.”
Anson stood abruptly and paced the room.
“What do you want me to do?” He finally stopped and looked at me.
“Stop staying away from her. Fuck all this other shit. I know you’ve gotten in deep with Matteo. I thought you weren’t about this life?”
“I’m not.” He sighed and stared up at his ceiling for a moment.
“I figured getting in there could give me some background information on what’s going on.
I have no interest in taking over for Matteo.
That’s never been my plan. Once it’s time for me to go, I’m leaving.
When I find who killed Mom and Tia, I’m out. ”
“With Rosalie,” I said.
He sighed. “I don’t want her like that. I don’t.
You’re going to leave me something broken that I won’t ever be able to fix.
She worships you. You’re the fucking love of her life.
I can’t compete. I don’t even want to.” He paused and licked his lips before sitting back on the couch.
“How about this? You fake your death and run. I’ll bring her to you. The three of us can be together?—”
“No,” I said simply. “If I die, I die for real. You take her away and give her the life she deserves where she’s safe. I know you’ll keep her away from all this shit. I believe it to my bones, Anson. Alessandro . You’re the Archangel. You’re a born protector. I trust in you to keep my girl safe.”
He glared at me but said nothing more for several long minutes. Finally, he spoke.
“Do I come crawling back then?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Won’t it cause more issues for her and the guys?”
I shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe not. Depends on how you handle shit. If you keep it friendly, I can’t imagine it being any worse than what it was.”
“Cole hates me.”
“Cole hates everyone who isn’t us.” I waved him off. “He hasn’t killed you yet. That means he probably won’t.”
Anson sighed. “I don’t know how to talk to her now.
I fucked up. I’m embarrassed. Last night with that chick.
Man, I-I was trying to forget shit. Then she called Rosalie.
Are you sure she doesn’t hate me? She barely spoke to me last night.
And you guys definitely cut out of here early.
I’m actually grateful for that because I wouldn’t have known what the fuck to say to her.
She’s the one person in this world I’m desperate not to disappoint, and I feel like I did with my actions. ”
“For one thing, you’re not her boyfriend.
You’re her friend. That’s it,” I said firmly.
“I’m well aware of what you want from her, and I know she cares for you more than she admits outwardly.
Hell, maybe even to herself. She’s a good girl.
She’d never step out on any of us. I think if you’re honest with her and tell her you’re sorry and want to go back to your friendship, she would accept it without question. ”
He scoffed and looked at his clasped hands. “I think I’ll need some time. I need to get my head together. I can’t go to her like this. She deserves better than the mess I am right now. I don’t want to cause issues for anyone either.”
“I’ll talk to Enzo,” I said. “He knows about last night. He didn’t lose his shit at all.
In fact, he kissed her and told her he loved her honesty.
I thought he’d lose his mind, and we’d go around in circles again, but no.
It was nothing like that. He’s trying to be better for her.
That means accepting some of the shit that comes with it. ”
“And I’m the shit,” he muttered, shaking his head.
“You’ve come a long way,” I said softly. “The first time we met you, I wanted to kill you. Now, here we are. I think it’s going to roll in your favor. Be patient.”
“No chance in Enzo and Cole letting me in?” He looked at me, his blue eyes filled with despair. “It would be so much easier that way. I-I don’t want just to take her away. I want to belong. I’d stay if I could belong.”
“No,” I said gently. “They’ll never let you join. Cole would lose his mind. Rosalie wouldn’t let you in based on that alone.”
He let out a sigh and gave a sad nod of his head. “What about this baby business? She said they’re going to try.”
I nodded. “It’s definitely an issue, but I think she’ll hold him off on it. As it stands, she’s agreed to wait until after she and Enzo are married.”
“And what about that shit? You get yourself killed, and I’m supposed to steal Enzo’s wife? Unless…” He crinkled his brows and looked at me. “You’re planning on doing this sooner than that, aren’t you? Like… in weeks.”
I swallowed hard and looked away from him.
“Fox, man. Come on. You are, aren’t you? You don’t intend on her marrying.”
“I’m saving her,” I whispered. “I love Enzo and the guys with everything I am, but I love her so fucking much more. I don’t want her to die because of this life.
She deserves the world. Enzo won’t be able to give it to her right now.
Maybe someday, but not now. She needs to experience a life outside this.
Had I known this was how it would be when I took her in the first place, I’d have stayed away.
” My throat was tight with my words. “I’d have endured without her.
But I’m weak, too. I couldn’t stay away, and because of that weakness, she’s in danger.
I have to rectify what I’ve done. That’s where you come in. ”
“When?” Anson demanded. “When the fuck are you going to do this shit?”
I shrugged. “I’m waiting as close as I can to the wedding. I’m hoping something changes. I don’t see that happening, though.”
“And if it looks good, he marries her, and then shit gets bad? Then I’m taking his wife?”
“Yes,” I said softly. “Then you’re taking his wife.”
“This is fucked up.” Anson rubbed his eyes. “I don’t want to do this, Fox. I’ll join you guys. I’ll protect her. I’ll die for you. Let me talk to Enzo about joining you all. I’ll even kiss Cole’s ass?—”
“Anson. You know what will happen if you do that. They’ll keep her further from you. It has to be this way. Just please… Let it.”
“I hate this. I really fucking hate it.” He sat back in his seat.
“But you’ll still help me?”
He sighed before letting out a groan of frustration. “Yes, but I’ll also be looking for ways to save your ass.”
“Don’t.” I got to my feet. “I don’t want to be saved.”
“Why?” He stared up at me, confusion on his face.
“I… I know what my life would look like here. I won’t leave for football. I’ll stay. I’ll end up dying anyway. At least this way, most of her life won’t be wasted. I’m going through the motions until the end. Knowing you’ve done your part, I’ll rest in peace when it’s over.”
He said nothing as he stared back at me. It was just as well. There wasn’t shit he could say to me to make me change my mind.
I walked to the door.
“I’ll come back, but I’ll need some time,” he called out. “Give me that, and I’ll call her. OK? I’d like to go back to watching over her.”
“I’ll make sure Enzo knows.” And with those words, I left his place, my heart heavy with grief, but knowing I was doing the right thing.
For my Rosie, anything.
I owed her after all the shit I’d put her through over the years. Giving her the life she wanted was my ultimate goal. Unfortunately, that meant I wasn’t here for it.
And that really fucking sucked.