81. Ethan
EIGHTY-ONE
ETHAN
T hree days. I worked my ass off in those three days.
Fox was right. I was a mess, and Rosalie didn’t want to come home to me like this.
So I plastered a smile on my face and didn’t get high once, even though it was killing me inside to be sober and without her. It made the pain that much more real.
Enzo took those three days and worked harder than I’d ever seen him work. He had people in and out of the house as he picked up the slack on their engagement party. He announced his parents would cancel their party because they wanted everything to be about Enzo and Rosalie’s impending nuptials.
Fox seemed quieter than usual, which was saying something since I’d noticed him withdrawing over the last few weeks. When I asked him about it, he only gave me a sad smile and said our focus should be on Rosalie and me, not him.
But I knew something was going on with him. He was depressed. He didn’t smile like he used to. There were no jokes. No playful moments. He was shutting down, and it terrified me.
“What do you think?” Cole asked as he held up Cotton, sporting a fancy new bow tie. “Think Rosebud will like his new tie?”
“Yeah.” I nodded. “I like that it has little birds on it.”
“It was either birds or fish.” Cole placed Cotton on the window seat in the living room. Cotton immediately zeroed in on a bird bouncing around on the lawn. “Since he seems to like birds, I figured it was a no-brainer.”
“Cole, I need you out tonight with Jake.” Enzo came into the room.
“Rosalie is coming home,” Cole said. “I’m not doing shit but waiting for her.”
“Wrong. You’re going out with Jake. He needs help setting some Russians straight.”
“Then you fucking go,” Cole snapped, his blue eyes flashing. “I’m not going to miss out on Rosalie coming home. It’s been an entire week. Not happening.”
A muscle thrummed along Enzo’s jaw.
“I’ll go,” I said softly.
Both of them snapped their attention to me.
“I can do it. I need to do more than make fucking drugs anyway. I’m one of the horsemen. I should be pulling my weight.”
“You do pull your weight,” Cole said. “You’re not going?—”
“Is it because you think I can’t handle it?” I challenged, getting to my feet. “Because I fucking can. I have something to look forward to when I get home.”
“E, man.” Enzo scrubbed his hand down his face. “We can’t risk?—”
“I’ll do it. I’ll go with E,” Fox said, entering the room.
“Fine.” Enzo shook his head. “I don’t like it, but it’ll work.”
“After all, you’re the one who deserves to stay home while we handle business,” Fox continued, a sour look on his face.
I glanced between the pair. They’d been acting oddly with one another for a long time now. We all knew Fox was still upset over the wedding, and he was definitely still pissed about the whole alley situation. Truth be told, I was, too.
“You got something to say?” Enzo demanded.
“Nope. I’ve already said it. Just tell me where we need to be…boss.”
Cole cleared his throat and looked from Fox to Enzo, a frown on his face. “Hey, this is dumb. I’ll go. E is right. I’ll have something to look forward to when I get home. No need to argue over shit. You guys will keep her company until I get back. No biggie.”
“I’ll still go with you,” I said to Cole. I wondered if it was a good idea, considering Fox and Enzo weren’t getting along. They might kill one another while we were away.
“I don’t care who goes, just not E alone. That’s all. Fox?—”
“Doesn’t matter,” Fox said, shaking his head. He walked out the front door. No one said a word as his Jeep barreled down the long driveway.
“You two need to really sit down and talk,” Cole said finally. “This shit can’t go south, so whatever is going on between you two needs to be resolved. Rosalie isn’t going to want to come back to the same old shit. If you two dipshits screw this up, I’ll kick both your asses.”
Enzo sighed and sat on the couch. Cole took a spot on the chair, and I sank back onto the loveseat.
“He’s pissed about me marrying Rosalie. He’s mad about her getting hurt. He blames me. He asked me to back off and just let this world go. I told him I can’t. I have a legacy to uphold, and I can’t let my father down,” Enzo said softly.
I frowned at his words. “I don’t like that Rosalie was hurt either. I’d be OK if we left?—”
“We aren’t leaving,” Enzo cut in. “We can’t. We’ve come too far. My father is proud of me for once. He expects me to make this work. I won’t give it up.”
“Not even for Rosalie?” I whispered. “I’d give it up for her.”
Enzo looked out the window, a muscle thrumming along his jaw.
“I would give it up for her. I would. I just… can’t.
I promised my dad. I can’t break that promise.
He’d be a target. So would my mom. They need me to be in this position to protect them.
It’s not just about Rosalie. It’s my entire fucking life. I can’t just walk away from it.”
“You’re right,” Cole murmured. “I get it. I also see E’s point. She’s not happy, man. She’s fucking left us for a week. Ran away to get some space. We keep having these same fights. I’m tired of them.”
“We fell in love too fast,” I said, my voice thick. “We didn’t give her time to grow. We just took from her and made demands that she obeyed.”
“So what the fuck do you guys want me to do?” Enzo snapped. “Huh?”
“Maybe we should listen to her—” I started.
“How? We can’t leave this life. I told you why. So then what do we do? Tell her we’re done? Not fucking happening.” Enzo glared at me.
“Let Fox take her,” I whispered, my voice wavering. “He’s been upset lately. Maybe the two of them can go on a small trip together again. That seemed to help last time.”
Enzo closed his eyes, and all was silent for a moment. “I will do whatever she asks, but I can’t leave this life. If she tells me she wants a vacation with Fox. With Cole. With you. I’ll say yes. I swear I will. But we’re not leaving what we built. That’s final.”
“She’s supposed to go on that vacation with me,” Cole said.
“Shit’s been too bad for us to do it. We can’t leave you right now.
At least, I can’t. If something happened to you, I’d fucking die too.
” Cole looked over at Enzo, a sad expression on his face.
“Any of you. I’m willing to put off my plans to ensure everything works out for all of us. ”
“Even the baby?” I ventured softly. I knew he kept pushing her on it.
Cole glared at me. “Enzo gets to fucking marry her, E. I want my fucking kid, OK? Not negotiable.”
“Maybe it should be,” I pressed. “It would take the pressure off her.”
Cole scowled at me. “She promised.”
I sighed, knowing I wasn’t going to get through to him. It didn’t matter what we did. I knew deep down shit would go from this to worse, and I prayed for our souls because it was going to fucking hurt.
I watched Cole shoot two of whom I assumed were Ivanov’s men in the head. They wouldn’t talk, but it didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. Enzo wanted a message sent, so we sent the damn thing.
Cole wiped the blood off his face and nodded for Jake and the men to clean shit up. After we’d spent the last three hours beating the shit out of them and them not talking, Cole had enough.
I’d had enough in the first thirty minutes.
“Enzo wants us to check out one of the warehouses,” Cole said, staring down at his phone and sighing. “If that’s clear, we can head back.”
I sighed. “Is Rosalie home?”
It was after nine at night. When we left hours before, she still hadn’t returned.
Cole typed out a message and frowned at the screen for a minute.
“Not yet. She just called and told him she’ll be there in a few minutes.” Cole sighed and darkened the screen. “Come on. Let’s get this shit over with so we can get home to her. I fucking miss her like I miss cake.”
I followed him out of the kill house, my name for the warehouse where we killed people, and into one of his cars, since he now had two.
We sat in the front seat silently for a few minutes before Cole spoke.
“I’m sick of this shit too,” he admitted softly. “I’d be good with us leaving this world and caring for our girl.”
I nodded. “Me too.”
“Too bad we’re fucked.” He started the car, and we squealed out of the parking lot.
He was right. We were fucked.