Chapter 5
Chapter Five
BLAKE
J ust as I’m about to chase an extremely pissed-off Harper, my phone rings, and it’s the clinic.
Shit.
Harper’s here . She’s even more gorgeous than I remember, and that’s saying a lot.
That one night with her has ingrained itself into my entire psyche, and aside from work and family, she’s all I think about.
I have so many regrets about not getting her last name or asking for her number.
Of course, I didn’t anticipate she’d sneak out on me.
If I knew that was coming, I never would have gone to sleep.
But now she’s here, in my hospital, and I have no intention of letting her slip out of my grasp again.
Of course, it would be just my goddamn luck that she thinks I’m fucking married. And we’ll have to rectify that situation as soon as fucking possible.
Scowling, I accept the call from my office.
“Dr. Blackwell.”
“Hey, Doc, this is Mo at reception. I’m wondering if I should continue rescheduling your day? I got your first hour of the day moved, and I can keep going if you think you’ll be at the hospital longer.”
I sigh and push my hand through my hair. “Give me another hour, Mo. I need to wrap a few things up here, but I’ll be in by”—I check my watch—“ten.”
“Got it,” she says. “Thanks, see you soon.”
I hang up and hurry back to the room where Dani and Bridger are waiting. I hate that Bryce is having issues this morning. After everything Bridger went through with Birdie when she was born so early and so small, this is the last thing my brother needs.
“Did you see him?” Dani asks right away as she pads out of the attached bathroom, and Bridger helps her back into bed.
“Sweetheart, all of this is preventive. They wouldn't be bringing him back to you if we thought he was in distress or failing.”
Dani swallows hard and nods as Bridger kisses the top of her head.
“Aspirating fluid isn’t uncommon,” I continue. “And because they caught it so soon, they can get ahead of it. The antibiotics aren’t a bad idea. I’m going to warn you, if they go that route, they’ll want to keep him here for seventy-two hours because it’ll be IV antibiotics.”
“I have to go home without him ?” Dani asks, her eyes wide in horror. She shakes her head. “Absolutely not. ”
“Hey, let’s not get ahead of ourselves, kitten,” Bridger says. “Let’s see what they say, okay? Stop working yourself up.”
Dani takes a deep breath. “Okay. Did you check in with your parents? How’s Birdie?”
“Birdie’s great, and she can’t wait to meet her baby brother,” I reply with a grin. “I FaceTimed them right after the birth and showed Bryce off.”
“Good.” Dani grins and relaxes a bit. “I don’t like being away from her, either.”
“You’re such an amazing mama,” Bridger tells her.
Dani isn’t Birdie’s biological mom, but she’s become a mother to that little girl in every way, and they share a special bond.
“I have to go,” I inform them, but then Dr. Lachlan comes back in with a smile.
“The good news is, the CBC didn’t show any infection in his little body. We’re growing some cultures to make sure. However, the X-ray does show a little fluid in there.”
She opens her laptop, brings up the images, and shows them to us.
Sure enough, left superior lobe. Damn.
“Harper is suctioning him now. Don’t worry, it’s annoying but not painful for him at all, and it’s probably all done by now. I do want to start an antibiotic to prevent any infection and get him started off on the right foot.”
“Can he stay in here with me?” Dani asks.
“Absolutely,” Dr. Lachlan says. “But we’ll watch him and keep an oxygen monitor on his toe. If he doesn’t want to eat because he’s gasping, please don’t panic. We can feed him today until his lungs calm down, and then he can start feeding regularly once his breathing evens out.”
Dani sniffs, and her doctor rubs her hand up Dani’s arm. “I know this isn’t what you expected today, Mom, but this is minor in the grand scheme of things. Bryce is healthy, and his coloring is good. He’s just breathing like he went for a jog.”
“Well, if he takes after me,” Dani says, wiping at her eyes, “he hates that because I don’t run.”
That makes us chuckle. The doctor finishes, answers questions, and promises to check on Bryce before she sends him back here.
“This sucks,” Dani says as she leans against Bridger, who’s just climbed on the bed with her and wrapped her in his arms.
He looks ridiculous. He’s huge and half of his ass is hanging off the side.
“I’m going to head out,” I inform them. “I have to get to the clinic, but I’ll check in with you guys between patients. Try to get some rest, you two.”
“Thanks, Blake,” Dani says, reaching for my hand and giving it a squeeze. “You’re the best brother-in-law ever. Don’t tell the others.”
I smirk, kiss her hand, and pat Bridger on the shoulder before I walk out of their room .
I want to go upstairs to the NICU to peek in on Bryce.
Okay, that’s not entirely true. Yes, I want to see my nephew, but I’d also like to see his gorgeous nurse and explain to her that I am absolutely, without question, not that baby’s dad.
And I’m not married.
And I’m not a fucking liar.
Rather than wait for the elevator, I take the stairs up one flight and walk down the hallway, but before I can reach the NICU, Harper herself comes walking through the doors, wheeling baby Bryce. He really is the sweetest little guy.
And I can see he’s not panting nearly as much as he was earlier.
“I’m not married,” I say in greeting, and Harper scowls.
“Okay,” she replies, not meeting my gaze, “then I won’t say anything to your girlfriend/life partner/fiancée/whatever the hell.”
“I don’t have any of that either.”
She scowls at me, finally looking me in the eyes.
“Bryce is gorgeous, and I love him, but he’s not mine.”
Her shoulders fall just a bit, and I realize she’s relieved.
Not because she was jealous but because she felt guilty.
Shit.
“He’s Birdie’s baby brother. The other guy who was in that room with us?
That’s my brother Bridger. And Dani, although yes, she’s beautiful and sweet, is Bridger’s wife, and I’m one hundred percent sure he’d break my arms off if he thought I even considered laying a hand on her. Which I never would.”
Harper frowns, swallows hard, and sighs.
“I’m no psychiatrist, but I assume that was a trigger for you.”
Now those gray eyes—not behind glasses today—blow wide, and she stares up at me.
“Uh. Yeah. And I apologize.”
I nod, and I want to touch her so fucking badly. But this is where we work, and there’s more to say at another time and place.
“Apology accepted. Take care of my nephew for me.”
“Of course. He’s doing better already.”
With a smile, I brush my fingertip down his head, over all that thick dark hair, then nod at Harper and walk away.
It feels wrong to walk away from her, and I hardly know her.
Hell, aside from knowing how she sounds when she comes, what she likes to eat, and the fact that she enjoys the same music as I do, I don’t really know her.
But I’m going to.
It’s been a fucking week.
An entire week of time at the clinic, the ER, getting Bryce home, and trying to fit in time with my family.
This is why I don’t pursue relationships. Because I am married to the hospital, having a full-time affair with the clinic, and my family is my sidepiece. Every minute of every day, I’ve wanted to track Harper down, get her number, take her on a date and then back to my place.
And I don’t want that for just one night.
I’m considering starting a … a something with this woman, yet the rest of my life is the same as it’s always been. It’s not fair to her.
Yet I can’t imagine not at least trying.
If she’s willing, that is. And I’m going to do my fucking best to persuade her.
After being at the clinic all day, I just finished a twelve-hour shift at the ER. I should go home and crash for the next ten hours. I get thirty-six hours off, and then it’s back in the clinic the next day.
However, I refuse to leave until I know if Harper’s in the building.
It’s four in the morning when I take the stairs up to the NICU floor. I’m still in scrubs and my white coat, and I need a shower.
I’ve looked better.
But I don’t fucking care.
It’s quiet, and the lights are low as I walk into the neonatal unit. There’s no one at the nurses' station, and when I skim the area, I see Harper sitting in a rocking chair, feeding a baby .
She’s in blue scrubs today, her hair in that messy bun, and she’s smiling at the newborn as she whispers something to them that I can’t hear.
Christ.
She’s fucking beautiful.
She glances up as I walk toward her, but she doesn’t pause in her rocking, and her face is calm as I approach.
“This is Jamison,” she says, looking down at the infant.
He’s tiny. Maybe three pounds. “He had a rough day. His mom couldn’t come in for his night feeding, so I’m doing it.
It always makes me sad when one of the parents can’t make it for the feedings, but she’s a single parent with two other kids at home, so she’s exhausted and overwhelmed. ”
She shrugs a shoulder and presses those plump lips together.
I squat in front of them. Monitors and machines make noises here and there, but for the most part, it’s quiet in here tonight. I know about Jamison and his mom.
She’s my patient.
But I can’t tell Harper that, so I stay quiet.
“Bryce is home,” I tell her softly.
“I know.” She smiles, and it lights up the whole fucking room. “He bounced right back. He was the best-case scenario, and I’m so glad he’s home and doing well. I really like Dani. And Birdie is hilarious. I got to meet her on their last day here.”
I nod, watching her.
“How long have you worked here, Harper? ”
Her smile slowly fades away, and I want to say something to bring it back.
But I don’t.
“The day Bryce was born was my first day here. He was my first patient.” She takes the bottle out of Jamison’s mouth and guides him onto her shoulder to lightly pat his back. “I’m the new charge nurse.”
My eyebrows lift. “Congratulations.”
“Thanks.”
“Traveling nurse gig over?”
She rolls her lips inward, then nods slowly. “Yeah. I think so. It was time to come home. My family needed me.”
I frown, and without thinking, I reply, “I thought you said you didn’t have?—”
“Not biological,” she says, but there’s no heat there. “My best friend and her siblings. They’re like siblings to me. Ava needed me. And maybe I needed to come home for me, too.”
Fuck yes, you did, sweetheart.
With the feeding finished, Harper stands and puts Jamison in his isolette. She checks the monitors and makes sure he’s settled and happy, then turns back to me.
“You look tired, Blake.”
I huff out a chuckle.
“Thanks?”
Her lips tip up into a smile. “Bad night in the ER?”
“Just a regular night.” I push my hand through my hair. “Listen, I’d like to?—”
She stops me by putting her hand on my arm .
“I’m going to pass.” She bites her lip and shuffles on her feet. “If I were ready for literally anything with anyone , I’d be giving you my number right now and would probably get a smidge clingy and you’d be like, whoa. Calm down, Harper.”
Unlikely.
“But you’re not.”
Her smile is sad, and I want to ask her why.
“I’m just not. I have this new job, some family stuff, life stuff.” She shrugs almost helplessly, and I want to pull her into me. I want to wrap my arms around her, bury my nose in her hair, and just hold her.
Instead, I put my hand out.
“May I please have your phone?”
She frowns but unlocks it and passes it to me, and I tap my number into it.
“There. You have my number. If you ever want to grab a meal, a coffee, go for a hike”—I lean into her so I can whisper in her ear—“or scream my name while my face is buried in that perfect pussy, you just call me.”
Her face flushes, and she chokes out a laugh as she takes the phone back.
“In the meantime, I’ll keep my distance. Good luck with the new job, Harper. You’ll be great.”
I wink at her and turn to walk away.
Every cell in my body screams at me not to leave. To go back and talk her into seeing me. Even if there’s no sex at all, I just want to be with her.
But I could see it written all over her gorgeous face.
She’s not ready .
And isn’t it just fucking ironic that the one woman who’s made me feel anything other than turned on for a very brief encounter is the one that I just can’t have?
My brothers would give me such shit for this if they knew. Because that’s what brothers do.
Not that I’ll be telling them.