Chapter 14
Chapter Fourteen
HARPER
“ B aby Alice needs to be fed,” my coworker tells me before she goes off shift. “She’s the only one I didn’t get to in time. She’s only about ten minutes behind, and her mom called and said they wouldn’t be able to make it to this feeding.”
“Got it.” I nod and start to walk toward the tiny preemie. She was born at just three pounds, and now she needs time to grow. “Have a good night.”
It’s my last evening on shift, and then I get a couple of days off, which I’m ready for. I love my job, but nights are particularly brutal for me.
I’m a day dweller.
But we all take turns to make it fair because babies aren’t only sick during banking hours.
Eventually, if I’m able to work my way up to the director of the department, I could move to day shifts all of the time, but that would mean less patient care.
It’s a catch-22. I love working with the little ones, so moving out of this role doesn’t excite me.
Alice is eating comfortably in my arms as I rock us back and forth in the chair when my phone buzzes with a text.
The grin on my face is massive when I see it’s Blake.
I miss him. I haven’t seen him since that morning almost a week ago when Greg gave us all a scare. Between our jobs and families, we haven’t had time to see each other, but we’ve sent a lot of messages back and forth, and he’s called me every chance he gets.
I have no doubt in my mind that Dr. Blackwell is interested in me, and it’s not all sexual. He checks in and asks how I am, if I need anything, and what he can do for me.
He’s so freaking swoony.
But really, at the end of the day, the only thing I need is to spend time with him, and time isn’t something we have to give each other right now.
It makes me wonder if pursuing something with Blake is a smart idea. But then, the thought of not having him in my life makes my heart physically hurt in my chest. I know that unless he’s the one to end it, that’s not an option for me right now either.
So I guess we’ll simply keep going the way we are for the time being.
I open the texts and feel heat spread over my cheeks.
Blake: So he’s giving her sex lessons? In this book of yours ?
I shift Alice onto my shoulder so I can burp her and type out a response.
Me: Says who?
Biting my lip, I wait while the little bubbles bounce, and Blake replies to my message.
Blake: I found your paperback on my couch where you left it the other night, and it seems I’m getting an education along with the female character.
Yeah, like Blake needs any advanced education on sex. The man could teach his own college courses on the subject. When I realized I left the book behind, I downloaded it on my reading device so I could keep going.
It’s fucking amazing.
I snort and set my phone aside to finish up with little Alice, get her comfortable in her crib, then move on to make my rounds and check in with everyone else.
Jamison’s mom is rocking him, skin to skin, and she’s silently crying to herself, so I squat next to her and lay my hand on hers.
“Hey, Naomie,” I say softly. “Is there something I can do?”
“No.” She wipes at her tears, and I stand to get her a box of tissues, which she accepts. “No, it’s just hard. I hate that I can’t be up here more often with him. He deserves to have me with him all day, every day, but I have two other kids and a full-time job. ”
“You’re doing the best you can.”
She shakes her head and just looks so damn sad.
“My best isn’t good enough. I’m a single mom, not by choice. And I already have so much going on at home. I think I have to give Jamison up, and it kills me, but I know in my heart that it’s the right thing to do for him.”
I blink quickly, completely blindsided by this conversation. “Naomie, this is a huge decision. I can arrange for you to speak with the hospital’s counselors again and?—”
“I’ve been through it until I’m sick to my stomach,” she replies, taking a long, deep breath.
“And the only time that I’m even remotely relieved or feel better is when I picture him with a family who can take care of him.
We don’t know what kind of medical needs he’s going to have long term.
I don’t even have insurance. I have no idea how I’m going to pay for his hospital stay. ”
She starts to cry again and reaches out for my hand with her free one.
“I love him. I love him so much , but Harper, I think I have to love him enough to do what’s right for him.
And I’m not going to lie, for me, too. And for my other two kids.
I don’t have a big family. I don’t have help.
I can’t do this by myself. I thought I could, but I didn’t expect him to be born so early, and it’s just too much.
I know that makes me a bad person and a horrible mom, but?—”
“Listen to me right now.” I hold her hand a little tighter, and her eyes find mine, swimming with tears and despair.
“You are not a bad person or a horrible mother. You’re being realistic about what you’re capable of, Naomie.
You’re thinking of all of your children and taking into consideration what their needs are.
I think you’re an incredibly strong woman.
I also urge you to spend one more session with a counselor to make certain that this is right for you.
To make sure that it’s not exhaustion or fear talking.
I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret for the rest of your life. ”
Jamison makes a little squeaky noise, and Naomie smiles down at him.
“I know. Thanks for letting me talk for a bit. I’ll talk with the counselor and my doctor, but I think I’ve made up my mind, Harper.”
She checks the time on her phone.
“Shit, I have to get home to put the kids to bed. My sitter has to go.”
“I’ll take him.” Naomie transfers Jamison into my arms. She kisses his sweet head before she gathers her things and smiles at me.
“Thanks again.”
“You’re welcome. Will I see you tomorrow?”
She pauses and presses her lips together. She won’t look at the baby now.
“Maybe.”
And with that, she walks away, and I cuddle Jamison for a minute longer, then kiss his tiny cheek and lay him down.
God, that sucks.
The whole situation just tugs at my heart.
My phone buzzes in my pocket, and I remember that Blake was texting me.
Blake: Sorry to blow up your phone, but this scene in front of the mirror? Happening. Just warning you.
A smile tugs at my lips as I shoot him a reply.
Me: Yeah? Lucky girl. I might be jealous.
That’s right, I’m a smart-ass. Not even ten seconds later, he responds.
Blake: That’s one orgasm that I’ll deny you. Keep talking shit, and you won’t come for a month, sugar.
I squeeze my thighs together and take a deep breath because holy hell, the man pushes all of my buttons.
Me: Just wait. It gets better. I love that book. I can’t believe you’re reading it.
Blake: You left it here. I was going to bring it back to you but decided you’ll have to retrieve it yourself.
Me: Not very chivalrous of you.
Blake: I have your chivalry right here, beautiful girl.
I laugh at that and quickly reply.
Me: I’m at work. Stop distracting me with your flirty texts.
Blake: Do you need anything? I can bring you something to eat.
God, I’d love to see him. Hug him. I’m damn tempted to say yes.
But then I’m called down to L & D for an emergency.
Me: Thank you so much, but I’m okay. Emergency just came in. Have to go. Sleep well, Blake. x
I really need tonight. It’s my night off, and it’s Spicy Girls Book Club time with Ava, Billie, and all the other girls I’ve come to know and like so much in such a short period.
This is only our second book club, but Ava and I are hooked.
“Wine?” Skyla asks, holding up the bottle.
“Please,” I confirm with a nod. “I don’t have to work tomorrow, so keep it flowing.”
Skyla grins and pours me a glass, and I choose a seat next to Ava.
At least twenty-five people are here tonight. I recognize the owner of the Sugar Studio, Jackie, who just set out a spread of huckleberry lemon bars and chocolate cupcakes. Millie’s here, along with Dani and two of her sisters, Alex and Charlie.
“Have you memorized everyone’s names yet?” Billie asks as she joins me, a bottle of water in her hand.
“I don’t know if I ever will,” I reply with a laugh. “I feel like I need name tags and a chart of some kind.”
Billie giggles and pats me on the shoulder. “You’ll figure it out. You already know at least half of these ladies.”
Before long, we dig into talking about the book and what we loved about it.
“It was sweet how he always reminded her that she’s gorgeous. That she shouldn’t be self-conscious no matter her size because he thinks she’s incredible,” Ava says, and there are nods all around.
“But can we talk about the hot tub?” Alex asks. “Because holy shit , that was hot.”
“And the mirror,” someone else joins in.
“And the limo,” Millie adds, and we’re all chuckling before long.
“I think the shower was my favorite.”
Our heads turn at the sound of a man’s voice, and I almost swallow my tongue when I see that it’s Blake, along with Bridger and a couple of men I don’t recognize.
“You know,” Billie says, “I wish we could get through just one book club without my brothers interrupting.”
I blink at her and turn back to Blake.
“He’s your brother ?” I demand .
“Those three are,” Billie replies, pointing at Blake, Bridger, and another man whose name I don’t know. “And that one is my husband.”
“Hey, bumble. I missed you,” her husband says with the same accent as Skyla, and I start to connect the dots.
“Whoa. That means that Skyla’s with …”
“Me.” The one who must be Beckett speaks up and walks right to Skyla. He picks her up and sets her in his lap. “You’re fucking gorgeous, Irish.”
“Holy swoon,” Ava says under her breath, making me huff out a laugh.
Staring at Blake, I shake my head. “Is there anyone in town who you’re not related to?”
“A lot of people, actually,” he says. “But there are a few I’m related to by marriage.”