Chapter 24
Chapter Twenty-Four
HARPER
B eing with Blake last night was exactly what I needed after yesterday’s chaos here at work. Before I arrived at his house, I’d briefly considered just going back to Xander’s, pulling the covers over my head, and sending Blake a message that I didn’t feel well.
But I needed him. I needed him to hold me and love me after the trauma of losing that little one. And as soon as his arms wrapped around me, and I felt his heartbeat so strong against my cheek, I knew it was the right move. Blake is my safe place.
Not to mention, the man can cook. He works magic in the kitchen. Once I had taken my shower and he’d fed me some of the best fajitas I’ve ever had—don’t tell Juliet—we curled up and watched a show before snuggling up in bed.
We didn’t even have sex, and honestly, we didn’t need to. It was still an incredibly intimate evening, and I hope we get to repeat it tonight.
Except I’d like to add in the orgasms this time.
“Jamison’s going home,” Amy tells me at the nurses' station.
My head swings up in surprise. “Really? Oh my gosh, I have to go say goodbye.”
Amy and I both walk over to Jamison’s little room, and I smile as the adoptive parents cuddle him while waiting for their final discharge papers from the doctor.
“Thank you so much,” Trevor, Jamison’s new dad, says as he sways side to side with the baby in his arms. “For everything.”
“Jamison did all the work,” I reply with a smile and slide my hands in my pockets, watching them. “We just kept an eye on him.”
“You’ve all been so wonderful,” Angie, Trevor’s wife, replies. They have been here around the clock since they were approved to adopt Jamison just a couple of weeks ago. “I’m almost scared to take him home. What if something happens, and I don’t have you there to help me?”
“Jamison is healthy,” Amy assures her. “He’s strong, and yes, he has a few challenges ahead, but the doctor would never send him home with you if he didn’t think that beautiful baby was ready or that you were more than capable of caring for him.”
“She’s right,” I add, reaching out to brush my knuckle down Jamison’s cheek. “You’re all going to do great. And if you ever have questions, call your pediatrician. ”
“Can I hug you?” Angie asks with tears in her eyes, and I immediately open my arms and let her hug me close.
“You’re a great mom, Angie. You’ve got this.”
She pulls back and then hugs Amy, who also has tears in her eyes. Trevor offers me a side hug, and after we say goodbye, I leave to check on my other patients after grabbing my laptop from the nurses' station.
We have a new little girl named Amelia, who came in a few days ago. She’s full-term, but she’s been struggling with breathing and heart issues, so she’s hanging out with us for a while.
“How’s Amelia this afternoon?” I ask as I walk into her area and open my laptop to check her chart.
“Still gasping,” Cindy, Amelia’s mom, says. She looks exhausted. She’s pale, has dark circles under her eyes, and won’t look away from her daughter.
“When was the last time you slept or ate, Cindy?”
She shakes her head. “Doesn’t matter. I’m not leaving her.”
“Where’s your husband?”
“He’ll be back. He ran down to the cafeteria for lunch.”
I narrow my eyes. “Is he bringing you back something so you can switch places?”
Cindy swallows and closes her eyes for a moment. “I’m not hungry.”
Setting my computer aside, I rest my hand on Cindy’s shoulder.
“You’re no good to Amelia if you’re sick, Cindy.
You need to eat. You just had a baby three days ago, and your body needs all the nourishment it can get, especially since you’re breastfeeding that little girl.
I’m going to call down for a meal for you, and I’m going to insist that you sleep in that recliner.
I’m not going to ask you to leave. But you need to take care of yourself, too. ”
Tears fill her eyes, and she looks up at me with so much despair, my heart aches. “What if I look away for even a second, and she dies?”
“We’re doing everything possible to keep that from happening. You, us, and Amelia. She’s so strong, Cindy.”
“Yeah, she is.” Cindy smiles through her tears and watches the baby. “Okay, I’ll eat something. My husband should be back soon, too.”
“Great. There’s a menu right in that drawer next to you. Just let me know what you want, and I’ll make it happen.”
“Thanks.”
With Cindy reading the menu, I get to work checking on Amelia. A lot of my job is reassuring parents because they’re terrified and sad, and I understand that. I would be, too.
Suddenly, behind me, I hear something bang against the floor. Someone screams, and then running feet pound on the floor.
“Harper!” Amy looks like she’s seen a ghost. “Help!”
I run with her across the unit and see a man standing over one of my nurses, who’s cowering on the floor.
“Call security,” I tell her.
“Already on it,” Amy assures me.
“I said don’t touch my son ,” he yells at the nurse on the floor. “What the fuck is wrong with you people? It’s your fault he’s in here.”
“Whoa. What’s going on?”
I quickly survey the scene. Baby Oliver is safe in his bassinet, but his mother’s face is white, and her hands are trembling. A medical tray of supplies is on its side, everything from the top of it scattered around the area, and the dad, who I haven’t met yet, is breathing fire, his hands fisted.
Is he on something?
“Who the fuck are you?”
“I’m the nurse in charge, and I’d like to know why you’re abusing my staff.”
His eyes narrow, his lips curl into a snarl, and I stand my ground as my nurse stands and quickly moves away.
He’s just like Nathan.
“I told her to stay away from my kid.”
“We can’t stay away from Oliver. He’s in our care. He’s a sick little boy?—”
“Because. Of. YOU!” he screams, getting right in my face. “If the staff here hadn’t fucked up when my girl was having him, he wouldn’t be in here. I don’t want any of you touching him. Am I clear?”
“You’re going to need to back away from me.”
His eyes travel up and down my body, and nausea rolls through me. “Is that right? Or what? You’re not going to do anything. You’re a piece of shit. A pitiful excuse for a nurse. Who the fuck are you saving? ”
“You’re a shitty nurse, Harper. I don’t even know why you bother.”
Blinking, I try to stay here and not go back there. Jesus, I thought I was through this.
“Back. Off. Or I’ll have you kicked out of here, and you won’t be allowed back in.”
“You’re not going to do shit to me. You’re nothing. I’m taking my boy.”
“No. You’re not.”
“Rich, they’re trying to help—” the mom says, but then he rounds on her, and I glance back, relieved to see that Amy is on the phone with security.
She gives me a thumbs-up, and I take a deep breath because I’ve started to shake.
I know I’m going to have a panic attack, but I can not do that in front of this guy.
“You’re nothing, Harper. No one wants you. That baby probably died because you didn’t know what to do. Just give it up already.” Nathan’s lips curled up in a happy sneer when he would start in on that shit, lecturing me for hours on end, always the same things over and over again.
“You’ll shut the fuck up,” this guy yells at the mother of his child. “If you weren’t so goddamn pathetic, we wouldn’t be here. Jesus, it’s just childbirth. Women do it every day without almost killing their baby?—”
“Enough!” My hands are fisted, and I’m so fucking pissed off. “Stop talking to her like that. It’s not her fault, and it’s not our fault that Oliver needs to be here. I get that you’re overwhelmed and scared, but you don’t get to abuse everyone around you. You need to leave.”
“I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart. ”
“Yes, you are,” a man says from behind me. It’s George from security, and two other guards flank him. “Police are on the way, too, Miss Harper. Come on, sir. You can’t hurt my girls up here.”
“Fuck off. That’s my baby.”
“Don’t care,” George says with a shrug. “You gotta go.”
All three guards have to forcefully remove the man from my unit, and I immediately check in with Carrie, the nurse who was on the floor.
“Are you okay?” I ask.
She nods and blows out a breath. “Yeah, mostly I’m pissed. He didn’t touch me. He threw the cart, and I fell when trying to avoid getting hit by it.”
“Good. Are you okay to stay on shift, or do you need to go?”
“I’m fine,” she says, shaking her head. “Really. Not my first asshole. I’ve got this, Harper.”
I’m glad you do. I can feel the adrenaline wearing off and the panic rising, but I manage to swallow it down and turn to the mom.
“Can we call someone to come sit with you?” I ask her, and I can hear the shake in my voice. Hold it together, Harper. Just a few more minutes.
“I’ve already texted my sister,” she says. “I’m not with him, by the way. We’re not married. He’s Oliver’s father, but we’re not together.”
“That’s none of my business,” I reply. “But if you ever feel unsafe?—”
“I have family, and my brother’s a cop,” she says, and I can’t help but think that my brother is also a cop, and there’s no way in hell that Easton would allow a man like that anywhere in the vicinity of my hospital room.
None of my family would. But like I said, none of my business. “We’re okay. But thank you.”
I nod and turn just as Amy walks up to me. She doesn’t touch me, but I know she can see that I’m going to lose it. I love this woman. She exudes calm. Like a grandma. Or a seasoned medical professional who knows her shit.
Amy knows this job inside and out. I’ve already learned so much from her.
“I need a minute,” I tell her in a low voice. My breaths are already coming fast. I keep seeing Nathan’s sneering face in my head, and I need a fucking minute to calm down without an audience.
I can’t stand the thought of breaking down where others can see me.
“Come on.” She wraps her arm around my waist and leads me into the stairwell, which is perfect because not many people use the stairs.
Oh God. Why can’t I get that asshole out of my head? Am I going to fall apart like this every fucking time someone mouths off to me?
“I’ll be right back,” Amy promises and leaves me alone.
Immediately, the panic attack sets in, and I can’t stop the tears that fall over my cheeks.
“You’re nothing. Christ, you’re lucky you have me because no one else in the world would bother with you.
You’re no fun, Harper. You’re such a fucking killjoy.
Do you even remember how to smile? And don’t even get me started on how pathetic you are to fuck.
” Nathan paces in front of where I sit on the couch, my head down, listening to the lecture.
Shaking my hands out at my sides because they’ve gone numb, I decide to sit on the top step because my knees are rubber and rest my forehead on the wall next to me. God, I hate his voice so much. How did I listen to him for all those years?
“Go away,” I whisper. “Just fucking get out of my head.”
I hear a door downstairs but ignore it. I don’t want anyone to see me like this, but I can’t get my legs to work quite yet, so they’ll just have to judge me and go about their day.
I don’t care.
Footsteps fly up the stairs, then hands are on my face.
“Baby, what’s wrong? Christ, Harper, what’s going on?”
I blink and frown when it’s Blake’s face in front of me. He’s brushing the tears off my cheeks, but I still can’t breathe, so I just shake my head.
“Go away,” I manage to get out.
God, I don’t want him to see me like this.
“Not a chance in hell, sugar.”
The door behind us opens, and I hear Amy’s voice.
“There was a really abusive dad a few minutes ago,” she says, filling Blake in. “Harper handled him like a damn boss, but when it was all over …”
“Got it,” Blake says and nods at Amy over my shoulder. “Thank you.”
“Here’s some water for her. Harper, we have things covered. Take your time, honey.”
Humiliation washes through me, and I close my eyes and tip my forehead against Blake’s shoulder.
“Fuck.” It’s a whisper.
“Talk to me, baby. Are you hurt? Did he hit you?” His big hands rub up and down my back, soothing me, warming me up from the inside out. This man centers me, brings me back to focus on the here and now, and reminds me that Nathan is in my past, where he belongs.
“No.” Finally able to pull in a full breath, I pull back and wipe my face. “I’m sorry Amy called you. You’re needed in the ER?—”
“I’m needed right here with my girl,” he says, those hazel eyes full of concern and love. “How often do you have panic attacks, Harper?”
“I haven’t since I moved home.” I shake my head. “The asshole dad used the right words to trigger me. I swear to God he was Nathan in a different skin.”
Blake’s hands tighten, and he growls, making me blink in surprise.
“I’m okay.” With a weak smile, I reach up and cup his cheek, wanting to reassure him. “Thank you for running up here, but I’m better now. It’s just not a fun voice to have in my head, and when it starts up?—”
“You call me ,” he says. “When it starts up, you call me, and we’ll deal with it. Because whatever those words are, they’re wrong, baby. You’re so fucking amazing. ”
“That’s two days in a row you had to watch me lose it.” I wince. “I don’t like that.”
“As long as you’re okay, I don’t mind. What do you need, Harper?”
Leaning close, I cover his mouth with mine and kiss him softly. “I need to spend time with you tonight, naked time, and maybe we can hike tomorrow?”
“How do you feel about a cool bike ride on my favorite path around the valley?”
My eyes widen. “Yes, please. But I don’t have a bike.”
He brushes my hair behind my ear, watching the motion with his eyes. “Yes, you do. You’ll be introduced tonight.”
“You bought me a bike ?”
“Yes, but if it doesn’t work for you, we can exchange it until you get what fits best.” He pulls me to my feet. “Are you okay to go back to work?”
“Yeah, I’m okay. I’m glad I didn’t fall apart in front of my staff and patients. Thank you.”
“I love you, baby.” He kisses my forehead, and I squeeze his hand three times, making him smile. “I’ll see you tonight.”
He turns and jogs back down the stairs, and when the door closes behind him, I let out a long breath.
Christ, I’m so in love with him.