Chapter Thirty
Miles
I woke to the quiet rise and fall of Julian’s breath.
He was still here—curled up beside me, tucked in my hoodie like it belonged to him, like he belonged to me. His face was half-buried in the fabric, mouth parted just slightly, lashes dark against his pale skin. Peaceful. Safe. Like nothing in the world could touch him in this moment.
God, I wished it could stay that way.
But the memories hit me all at once—crashing through the quiet like a wave pulling me under.
Julian. On his knees. Over the toilet.
The sharp gasp when he realized I’d caught him.
The way his whole body had trembled like he’d been caught bleeding in the dark.
The broken, shattered look in his eyes that gutted me more than any words could.
And then the way he crumbled into me—crying, truly crying for the first time in who knows how long—clutching at me like I was the only thing holding him together.
I’d held him. God, I’d held him so tightly. Whispering everything I could think of—“You’re okay, I’ve got you, I’m here, I swear”—like that could undo the years of quiet hell Victor had carved into him.
And then...
Then he kissed me.
And for the first time... he wanted it. Not to perform, not to prove something, not to please anyone else. Just because he chose it. Chose me.
And every part of me—every part that cared for him, adored him, loved him—wanted to give him that. Make him feel wanted. Whole. Unbreakable.
The way he whispered please... it still echoed in my chest.
I glanced at him now, lying small and soft beside me, and something protective flared up hard behind my ribs.
Victor.
That bastard’s name made my jaw clench and my hands curl into fists against the sheets.
How many times had Julian done that? Alone? Scared? Forced?
And he never told anyone. Not until last night.
I closed my eyes, letting out a slow breath. I wanted to wake him. I wanted to pull him to my chest and kiss his temple and tell him he’d never, ever have to hide again.
But I didn’t. Not yet.
He needed sleep. He deserved peace.
I’ll keep you safe now. I promise.
I sat there, quiet in the morning light, brushing a stray lock of hair from his face as he sighed and burrowed deeper into my hoodie like he never wanted to leave.
And neither did I.
Not now.
Not ever.
Julian’s fingers toyed with mine, tracing lazy circles that made my skin tingle. I couldn’t help but grin down at him.
“You know,” I teased softly, “you snore when you sleep.”
He shot me a half-lidded, ‘really?’ look. “I do not.”
“Oh, yeah?” I chuckled. “Last night, you were snorting like a little piglet. Almost woke me up.”
He rolled his eyes but the corner of his mouth twitched into a smile. “Well, I don’t snore. Maybe you just imagined it.”
“Uh-huh,” I said, nudging him gently with my nose. “Sure you didn’t.”
Julian laughed quietly, that soft, genuine sound I wanted to memorize forever.
“You’re such a dork,” he murmured, fingers tightening around mine.
“And you’re adorable,” I whispered back, brushing a strand of hair from his forehead.
He closed his eyes again, leaning into my touch. “Promise me something?”
“Anything.”
“That you’ll stay. Even when I’m being a pain. Or snoring.”
I kissed the tip of his nose. “I promise. Even with the snoring.”
He smiled in his sleep, and I held him a little tighter, grateful for this quiet morning, this soft moment where everything felt right.
Without warning, I flopped my body over Julian’s, pinning him gently beneath me. His surprised grunt morphed into muffled protests as I covered his mouth with a quick kiss.
“Mmph—Miles! Hey!” he grumbled through the kiss, but I could feel the smile twitching beneath my lips.
I eased off, scooping him up effortlessly into my arms. “You’re too cute not to tease,” I murmured, carrying him over to the couch.
He settled into the cushions with a mock glare, crossing his arms. “You’re such a dork, you know that?”
I grinned, flopping down beside him and nudging his shoulder. “Dorky and proud.”
Julian shook his head but his lips twitched upwards. “Well, at least I’m not the one who snorts in his sleep.”
“Hey, that was one time! Maybe twice,” I teased, nudging his ribs.
He gasped, wiggling away. “Okay, okay! Truce.”
I pulled him close, fingers curling around his hand. “Good. Because I like waking up next to you—even with the snorts.”
His eyes softened as he looked up at me. “I like waking up next to you, too. Even when you’re a giant goof.”
I laughed, resting my forehead against his. “Deal then. Goof and snorter forever?”
“Forever,” he whispered.
I looked down at Julian, tracing the tension in his jaw, the subtle shift in his eyes. “Hey, are you hungry? Want some tea?”
He shook his head slowly, voice barely above a whisper. “No... I’m ready. I want to tell you everything.”
“Are you sure?” I asked, my hand tightening gently around his.
He nodded, swallowing hard. His eyes glistened with unshed tears. “Okay... here goes.”
He took a shaky breath, voice trembling as he started to unravel the darkness he’d been carrying alone
“It started... a long time ago,” Julian began, his eyes not quite meeting mine.
“Victor—my photographer, the one who controls my image—he’s not just strict.
He’s... cruel. At first, it was little things, like the way he’d criticize my weight, my eating habits, my every move.
He’d call me disgusting or pathetic if I didn’t look exactly how he wanted. ”
He gulped. “But it got worse. The verbal abuse turned sharp, cutting into me every day. He’d yell at me in front of everyone—on set, at meetings—telling me I’m a disappointment, that I’ll never be enough unless I’m perfect.
He’d say I’m useless if I gained a pound, like my worth depended entirely on my body. ”
Julian’s fingers clenched the fabric of his hoodie, trembling. “Then came the physical. Slaps... sometimes he’d corner me, hit me so hard I’d fall down. And I was terrified—terrified to fight back because I knew what would happen if I did.”
Tears welled in his eyes as he looked up, voice cracking.
“Yesterday... he grabbed me after the shoot. Said I was gaining weight. Told me I was eating too much. Pulled me to the bathroom, pulled my wrist, shoved me to my knees, and he...put his fingers in my mouth... he made me throw up everything I’d eaten that day with you.
I tried to stop him, but he didn’t care.
He said if I didn’t do it, he’d ‘do it for me.’”
Julian’s body shook as fresh tears spilled over. “He threatened me again—said if I didn’t lose ten pounds before the next shoot, there’d be consequences. I was scared, Miles. So scared.”
He choked back a sob. “I’ve been living like this, pretending it’s normal... trying to be strong, but it’s breaking me.”
I felt my heart shatter. I pulled him closer, my voice steady but soft. “Julian, you’re not alone anymore. None of that is your fault. You’re so brave for telling me. You don’t deserve any of it.”
I brushed tears from his cheeks, my fingers trembling. “You are beautiful, worthy, and so much more than his cruelty. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”
He leaned into me, trembling, and I held him as tightly as I could, letting him know he was finally safe.
Julian’s voice wavered as he pulled back just enough to meet my eyes again, the fear and exhaustion still heavy in his gaze.
“I feel trapped, Miles. Like I’m stuck in this.
.. this contract, this life, this nightmare.
I don’t know how to get out. I don’t want to keep going like this—being scared every day, hurting, pretending.
But I don’t know what to do. I’m scared there’s no way out. ”
I held him tighter, trying to send all the strength I could through my touch. “What if we ask Renee for help? She’s smart, knows the business—and she cares about you. I won’t tell her everything if you don’t want me to. Just enough so she can figure out how to help.”
Julian’s body tensed immediately, fear flickering in his eyes like a warning flare. “No,” he whispered, almost out of habit. “I can’t. I don’t want her knowing all this. It’s too much.”
I cupped his face gently, steadying him. “I know it’s scary, but this could be the first step to freedom. This is for you—for your safety and your peace. I’ll be with you every step of the way. You won’t have to face this alone.”
His breath hitched, uncertainty battling with a fragile flicker of hope. Slowly, he nodded, leaning into me like maybe—just maybe—there could be a way out.
I leaned back on the couch, grinning as I caught Julian eyeing the tea I made him like it was some rare, dangerous artifact.
“It’s not poisoned, you know,” I teased, nudging the mug closer to him with my knuckle.
“Unless you count excessive honey as a weapon. Which—honestly—you should. I got a little carried away.”
Julian gave me a look—flat, unimpressed—but I caught the ghost of a smile at the corner of his mouth.
Victory.
“Is everything you make loaded with sugar?” he muttered, picking up the mug anyway.
“Only for you, grumps.” I winked. “Keeps you sweet.”
He huffed softly, sipping the tea, and I swear—maybe for the first time today—he actually relaxed into the cushions. His shoulders dropped by a fraction.
Feeling brave, I stretched out beside him and rested my head dramatically on his lap. “You know, I think I’ve earned this after today. Emotional support boyfriend duty. Exhausting work.”
Julian raised a brow, the corners of his mouth twitching. “Is that what we are now? Boyfriends? I didn’t know this,” he said dryly, a teasing glint in his eye.
I grinned up at him, smug. “Yep. Decided for you. Read your mind and everything. You’re officially my boyfriend and I’m yours. No take-backs. Deal with it.”
Julian snorted, rolling his eyes—but his hand came up, brushing my hair off my forehead with the softest little touch. “Pushy.”
“Charming,” I corrected, grinning wider. “You love it.”
He huffed, but the sound was warm. Real.
Julian snorted—an actual, honest snort. “You’re insufferable.”
“Correct. But I’m also warm and make excellent furniture,” I grinned, wiggling into a more ridiculous position like a cat claiming its favorite spot.
He set his tea down and poked my cheek with one finger. “You’re going to be the death of me.”
“Maybe,” I said. “But at least I’ll make you laugh first.”
Another small smile—real this time. My chest warmed.
We stayed like that for a while—me in my dramatic sprawl across his lap, Julian absently carding his fingers through my hair like he didn’t even realize he was doing it. I closed my eyes and sighed happily.
“I could get used to this,” I mumbled.
Julian didn’t answer right away, but his hand stilled for just a moment before continuing—gentle, thoughtful.
“Me too,” he said, quiet but sure.
Yeah. This? This felt right.