Chapter Forty-One
Mikayla
I’m wasted! I never drink like this, ever! Well… I look over at Caine and giggle at the memory. The first time I met him, I got a little tipsy, but nothing like this. But in my defense, I’m enjoying myself, I’m not driving, and I trust Caine. What’s he going to do, fuck me? God, I hope so!
Yesterday afternoon had been shitty! Like, next level horrible! But with Caine at my side, I was able to get through it. I hadn’t yelled or lost it with my mom like I would have if Jack and Caine hadn’t been there.
Caine had seriously gone to bat for me. I knew he would be there, I knew he’d come to my defense, but what I hadn’t expected was for him to lay into my mom. He actually told her she needed therapy! It was epic! And then on the phone this morning—my boyfriend is fucking incredible!
I lean into his side as we walk to the hotel, holding his hand in both of mine. “Have I said thank you?” I ask him, looking up at the sexiest man I’ve ever seen.
“For what? Dinner?” he asks, a crease forming between his brows. “You said thank you when I paid, sweetheart,” he says like I’ve forgotten.
I roll my eyes. “I’m drunk, not an idiot.”
Caine chuckles. “Okay, then what are you thanking me for?” he asks. His grin is so warm, his blue eyes like ice sparkling down at me.
“For being you,” I say. I feel an ache in my chest, so I look down at my feet. I’ve definitely had too much to drink. I turn my head and look up at him. “Thank you for protecting me yesterday. What you did with my mom.”
I see him swallow, and he nods his head. “I will always fight for you.”
And I know he will.
As we walk into the hotel I look around and wonder what my father would think of everything.
“Do you think my dad would be disappointed in me?” I ask Caine as we crawl into bed.
“Why would you even think that?” Caine asks, his voice incredulous.
We lie back and he pulls me into his arms. “Before he died, he wanted me to work things out with mom,” I explain.
Caine pulls me closer against him. “I didn’t know your father, and I won’t pretend to speak for him, but I will say this.
Working things out, that requires your mother to get her shit together.
It means her treating you and your brother with respect and love.
You being a punching bag is not healthy.
And for what it’s worth, I’m proud of you.
Sticking up for yourself and setting boundaries is far more mature and powerful than letting people walk all over you. ”
Caine places a kiss on the top of my head. I smile and cuddle closer to him.
Tonight, as I fall into slumber, my mind whirls with thoughts and feelings—and I dream. And the dream is so vivid, it’s as though it’s real.
“All I want for you is happiness,” my dad says as we sit on the deck of my childhood home. My dad’s arm is slung over my shoulders as our feet dangle over the water. The sun shines overhead, and heat surrounds me, and I feel happy.
“I wish things were different,” I admit to him.
“Of course, you do. Your mom isn’t the same person anymore. She’s lost. I never meant for you to think it was my wish for you to let her hurt you. I just wanted everyone to be okay when I left,” he says, a furrow between his brows as he regards me.
As I look at my dad, his green eyes are sad, but what catches my attention the most is how healthy he looks.
Gone is the ashen complexion. Instead, his eyes are vibrant, though sad.
The man sitting beside me is my father from when I graduated high school, not the man who fought for every breath he took before his life was extinguished. Seeing him this way makes me happy.
“Jack is going to live near me,” I tell him, excited to share something positive with him about my life.
“And Caine is pretty amazing,” my dad says with a chuckle, elbowing me in my side, making me giggle. “Much better than Cody,” he adds. His voice low now, serious.
“I’m going to marry him,” I tell my dad. “He hasn’t asked me yet. But when he does, I’m gonna say yes.”
“Have Jack walk you down the aisle. And come visit me before you leave. But don’t wake up Jack, he’s busy,” my dad says. “There are people you need to meet,” he adds cryptically.
“Busy?” I ask, my brows drawn.
My dad chuckles. “I love you, dear girl. Never lose that innocence.” My dad places a kiss on my forehead and holds me against his side. “But it’s time to wake up now. Get Caine and come to my grave. I want to meet him.”
“But if I wake up, you’ll be gone,” I say, panic rising inside me. I blink back the tears that threaten to fall as my nose begins to sting from fighting back the sob that lives rent-free in my soul. “I miss you!”
“I miss you too. God, how I miss you,” he says. “But just because you wake, doesn’t mean I’m gone. Look into your brother’s eyes, and you will see a part of me looking back at you. And always know that no matter what, I love you.”
A cry bursts from my chest, startling me awake.
“Mikayla?” Caine asks, sitting up abruptly. “Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” he asks. He leans over me, a warm hand cupping the side of my face as tears fall from my eyes.
“You’ll think I’ve lost my mind!” I croak, unable to breathe.
Caine pulls me up and leans against the headboard, holding me. I wrap my body around his, allowing him to ground me back into reality. His warmth bleeds into me, comforting me.
“Did you have a bad dream?” he asks softly, his voice rough from sleep.
I shake my head. “No. It was perfect. I didn’t want it to end.”
“Then why did you scream?”
I breathe in and decide to just tell him.
“I was with my dad. And it felt so real. And I didn’t want to wake up,” I explain, sniffing as I recall the dream.
“I didn’t want him to go away.” I try to breathe, but the pain is right there, at the base of my throat, taking my oxygen.
I shut my eyes, but the image of him is gone.
I cry. I cry hard. I can feel how hot my face is, and my nose is a stuffy mess. Caine gets up and grabs some tissues for me. After a few more minutes, I’m finally able to breathe again. “In the dream, he asked me to bring you to visit him.”
“If you want to go to the cemetery, now’s the time to do it. We have three hours before our flight,” Caine says, turning to look at the clock.
I squeeze Caine close and sigh, taking in the way his cologne lingers on his skin, warm, yet fresh. He places a soft kiss on my lips, and my heart finally slows.
“Let’s introduce you to my dad,” I say with a sad smile. I throw off the blankets and hop out of bed.