Chapter 5
Donovan
The sun warms my body as I lie next to Beth on the loungers surrounding the pool.
We’d planned to meet this weekend at my stepdad’s house so we could catch up, but neither of us expected Diablo to show up too.
Well, that’s not completely true, I’d hoped he would.
I may have told his best friend, Tank, that Beth would be here with me.
Judging by how often he’s looking over here and staring at her, something is definitely going on between them, and they need all the help they can get.
“So come on,” Beth says, grinning at me, “your mom and Diablo can’t hear us now, so spill. I want to know everything!”
“My classes are really amazing—”
I’m interrupted by her chucking a handful of ice from her drink over me.
“Fuck off, Donovan, I don’t want to hear about your classes,” she says, both of us laughing.
“You don’t want to hear about my classes? Really?” I ask mockingly, throwing some ice back at her and making her scream.
“Please, Donovan. I need gossip, I want to hear about all the hot guys you’ve met, you’ve barely said anything in your messages.”
“Not much to say, there was this one guy, Kyle, but he turned out to be a complete asshole.”
“Oh my god, what happened?” she asks, concern crossing her face.
“He’s the friend of someone I kind of know; we all went for coffee together, and he was flirting with me—”
“And you noticed? He must have been going hard,” she chuckles.
“Shut up! I’m not completely oblivious, I just choose to ignore it. But yeah, he was also going pretty hard,” I laugh. “Anyway, after the coffees he walked me back to my dorm and asked me to go to a party.”
“He asked you out? Did you go?” she asks.
“Yeah, and we hung out, and talked, he seemed nice. He asked if I wanted to see his room, even held my hand in front of everyone when he led me there.”
“So what happened? How was he an asshole?” she asks.
“When we got to his room, he told me that he liked me, and he leaned in, like he was going to kiss me…”
“And did he?”
“Yeah,” I nod.
“Okay, so I need details, what was it like?”
“It felt nice… I think. Not like I was expecting…”
“Well first kisses can be awkward,” she says, “and maybe it all happened a bit quickly, so you didn’t have time to really process it. How was it different from what you expected?”
“I don’t know. I remember thinking that he tasted like beer, but that’s about it. I guess I thought I’d feel more… is that stupid?”
“No,” she laughs softly, “not stupid, some kisses do make you feel more.” Her gaze flicks to Diablo for a moment before returning to me. “What happened after the kiss?”
I sigh, “Well that’s when it all went to shit. He asked me if I was ready, and I didn’t understand what he meant at first, then he asked me if I was prepped—”
“He wanted sex? Just like that?” she asks.
“Yeah, I started to panic, I didn’t know what I was doing, but I knew I didn’t want to do that. He mentioned something about me never being fucked by a guy before, and then he got really angry at me—”
“What?” Beth whisper shouts at me, fury laced across her face.
“Yeah, then he asked if I wanted to give him a blow job, but I didn’t want to do that either. He said he thought I was cute but that he wasn’t gonna hold my hand through it, so I got the hell out of there.”
“Good, you need to stay well away from him,” she says.
“Yup,” I nod, “like I said, he’s an asshole.”
“Understatement of the fucking century! I can’t believe he had the nerve to even ask that after the way he treated you. Donovan, I’m so sorry.” She leans over and takes my hand, squeezing it gently. “You know this is not on you, right?”
Warmth spreads through my chest at how well she knows me, knowing how I would have internalized his actions and thought it was me.
“I know,” I say, “at the time, I did think it was all my fault, that I was the issue. I felt so embarrassed, but my roommate talked me through it.”
“You talked to your roommate about it? The jock?” she asks.
“Yeah, when I went back to the room, it was obvious I’d been crying, and he kind of guessed. Apparently a couple of his friends have had issues with Kyle in the past. He was worried about me going to the party with him but didn’t want to interfere in case it ruined something good for me.”
“Huh,” she smirks.
“What?”
“What’s going on with the roommate?”
“What do you mean?” I ask, knowing I probably sound incredibly defensive.
“I mean, you just had a look on your face when you talked about him.”
“I didn’t have a look; there was no look.”
“Oh there was a look, a blushing dreamy look!” she chuckles. “There’s something going on with the roommate, isn’t there?”
“What? No! Don’t be ridiculous.” I stand and step towards the pool.
“So why are you avoiding talking about him?”
“I’m not avoiding!”
“You’re literally moving away from me right now!” She grins at me from her lounger as I lower myself into the pool.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” I say, swimming away on my back, knowing she won’t continue if there’s distance between us in case Diablo or my mom overhear.
She shakes her head, and I know it’s not the end of her questioning, but honestly, I don’t even know what I’d tell her about Stephen.
All I’ve mentioned to her so far is that he’s a hot straight jock who didn’t have the time of day for me.
She doesn’t need to know that I was very wrong, and he’s actually not straight, and he’s also incredibly sweet and caring, and I still can’t stop thinking about how amazing he smelled when he hugged me and how well I fit against his chest.
I managed to avoid being alone with Beth for the rest of the afternoon, as we were getting ready for the gallery event Mom and Miguel are taking us to.
All I need to do now is keep avoiding her throughout the evening so she can’t corner me into talking about Stephen.
I can’t lie to her, but I promised him I’d keep the fact that he’s pansexual a secret.
It will just be easier not to talk to her about him for now.
We’re waiting in the living room for my mom and Beth. Mom is thrilled that Diablo agreed to come with us tonight, honestly I bet she’d be even happier if she knew it was because he wants to spend more time with Beth, anything to get him as far away from the club as possible.
“Muy bonita, mi amor,” Miguel says to my mom as she walks into the room.
She does look beautiful, and it makes me all the more grateful that she’s away from my father and found a man who treats her the way she deserves, like a queen.
“You look great, Mamá,” Diablo says.
Beth appears on the stairs through the door, and I let out a loud wolf whistle. Ninety-nine percent of the time she’s a ‘jeans and T-shirt’ girl, and always looks beautiful, but when she does make the effort to dress up, she’s an absolute knock out.
“You look beautiful, mija,” Mom says to Beth. “Doesn’t she look beautiful, ángel?”
My mom’s the only one who can get away with calling him his real name, to everyone else, he’s Diablo. I’m curious how he’ll respond to being put on the spot like this. The fact that he showed up here is proof there’s something going on between them, but how long do they plan on keeping this quiet?
“Um… yeah… uh… she looks great,” he mumbles.
Wow, I’ve never seen him nervous over a girl before, he really is into her. Seeing the looks between them both, and the open way Miguel is gazing at my mom, loneliness washes over me. I wish more than anything that I could have a relationship and someone who looks at me like that.
As I’m thinking this, it’s also Stephen who enters my mind, picturing him as he’s been during this last week, so much more open and comfortable, spending more time in the dorm room, just shooting the shit and talking about classes.
I hope he’s having a good time in Tynerston; he’s there for training this weekend.
I can text him and ask, can’t I? That’s something a friend would do… right?
Hey, just wanted to check in and see how training is going, hope you’re having fun! Donovan.
Stephen
With the happy voices around the room and home-cooked food, this is the most at home I’ve felt since leaving my parents’ house.
Our wide receiver coach, Ted, and his wife Bri invite the receivers and quarterbacks around every month for a meal.
I was nervous because the others have been here before and played together for a long time, but Bri instantly made me feel welcome and it didn’t take long to settle in and enjoy the food and banter.
Ted’s a master on the grill and Bri made the most amazing sides to accompany our steaks; we’ve got greens, mac ‘n’ cheese, cornbread, and potato salad. I’d eat way more if I could, but I’ve still got Sunday training to go and don’t want a food hangover tomorrow.
I’m sitting next to Marcus Grant, the starting quarterback, who I’ve grown closest to over the training sessions.
He’s been helping me practice my one-handed catches, a trick I challenged myself to learn from a young age, but I’ve yet to use it in a game scenario; he thinks it could be the thing that sets me apart from the other receivers and running backs.
I’ve mainly been known for my speed during my career; I’m one of the fastest runners in the offense, scoring highly on the forty-yard dash at the Scouting Combine, but it’s a whole different game when you’re running against some of the pro defense players.
“Do all the positions get invited to their coach’s house for a meal?” I ask, curious about how the rest of the team socialize.
“Not all, some of them go out for dinner instead. I’m lucky, I get invited to lots of dinners, everyone wants to keep the quarterbacks happy!
” he chuckles. “Ted used to invite the receivers only, but he knows it’s important for us to spend time together too.
You need to trust me to get the ball to you, and I need to trust that you’ll do the right thing with it when you get it. ”