Twenty-Five #2
‘Which is understandable,’ he hastened to add. He didn’t want to get in the way of any of that. ‘Also, is it okay if I come visit you in the city when I can get away from here? And do you see us as platonic co-parents going forward or do you want something more?’
Other questions crowded his brain, but she’d tensed up at the current barrage so he stopped.
‘That’s quite a list,’ she said, with a little half laugh that sounded more bemused than amused.
She turned then, the water sloshing in the bath as her front slid over his front, looking up into his face.
‘Let’s take this from the top, shall we? I won’t be free for Christmas. After almost a year away from the place, I’m not going to swan in and ask for Christmas off. It’s always hotly contested and people will have already made plans months ago. I don’t want to annoy people my first few weeks back.’
Begrudgingly, Lachlan understood. It might have been a long time since he’d worked shifts but he still remembered what a bun fight the Christmas roster was.
‘Yes,’ she continued, ‘there will be antenatal appointments. Finding an obstetrician is a top priority when I get back and, if you want and you can swing it, then it would be great if you could attend as many of those appointments as possible. I should be able to give you plenty of notice. Which means, you will be seeing me in Sydney.’
She smiled then and the itch under Lachlan’s skin eased a little. ‘In fact, I’m very much looking forward to it.’
Lachlan couldn’t help his answering smile. She wanted to see him again. ‘You are, huh?’
‘Yeah.’ Her smile got bigger. ‘I am.’
Unfortunately, it faded fast as her brow wrinkled.
‘I don’t know where the baby’s going to be born yet.
I guess I’m still trying not to get too far ahead of myself and I figured that question would be answered when I found an obstetrician.
No, I wouldn’t ask my mother to be there.
’ She paused for a beat or two, her gaze drifting over his shoulder, as though the admission had embarrassed her and she couldn’t quite meet his eye.
‘We don’t really have a touchy-feely kind of relationship and she’s pretty highly strung, which is probably not what I’m going to need.
Also, they retired to the Eyre Peninsula a couple of years ago.
But I’m sure they’ll be on a plane as soon as the news comes through. ’
Her eyes returned to his then, bold again as they held his unwaveringly. ‘And yes, I want you there. Of course I want you there. If that’s what you want.’
Mentally, Lachlan sagged a little. He didn’t realise how it had been gnawing at him until this definitive assurance. ‘I wouldn’t miss it for anything.’
Except, of course, that was a possibility, what with babies arriving whenever they damn well pleased and Lachlan potentially being many hundreds of kilometres away when labour started.
But. She wanted him there. That was enough for now.
‘Good to know.’ She smiled briefly before ploughing on.
‘I guess I’ll take maternity leave around thirty-four weeks, but that’s going to very much depend.
I’m a geriatric pregnancy, don’t forget.
Which makes me more susceptible to pre-eclampsia, for example, which might force me to take leave earlier. ’
Lachlan nodded—that made sense.
‘As for us?’ She shrugged. ‘I don’t know yet.’ Two earnest green eyes implored him to understand. ‘Right now, with me leaving in a month, all I can say definitely is that we’ll be coparenting. I just don’t know what that’s going to look like at the moment. Do you have any thoughts on it?’
Oh yeah, he did. But … ‘Probably not helpful ones.’
She laughed. ‘Okay, well … let’s hear them anyway. I want to know what you’re thinking about all this stuff.’
Man … he hoped like hell he didn’t ruin this.
‘I love this little girl we made together already more than I thought was possible to love anything. But …’
He hesitated and she said, ‘It’s okay. It’s cards on the table time. You can say it.’
‘I’m just not interested in living in the city.
I’ve been there and done that and I know it’s not for me.
’ He looked over her head at the scene in front of him as dusk draped itself over the landscape.
‘This is my life.’ He returned his attention to her.
‘But I don’t want to have some long-distance, part-time relationship with my kid, either.
And, if I’m being honest, I’d like her to grow up out here, with all of this.
With Reggie and Albert and the biggest pumpkin in show every year and baby lambs in spring and the wattle blooming in June. ’
Rowena nodded slowly as he laid out his conundrum, and he could see that she understood his conflict. She wasn’t angry or defensive about it, she was contemplative.
‘Yeah.’ She nodded. ‘I get that. And I’m not saying that’s not a possibility. What I’m saying is I don’t have all the answers right now, and I’m asking you to be patient with me. Give me a month to get my bearings back at work and we can reassess.’
Lachlan nodded. It was more of a plan than they had fifteen minutes ago. They’d both laid their cards on the table and Rowena wasn’t shutting him out. She hadn’t dismissed or felt threatened by him telling her he’d like their daughter at Blairgowrie. And she hadn’t ruled it out, either.
So, there was reason to hope.
‘Sounds like we’ve got ourselves a plan,’ he murmured.
She smiled. ‘Shake on it?’
Lachlan smiled back. ‘Nah,’ he said, lowering his mouth to hers, kissing on it instead.