60. Ember
CHAPTER SIXTY
EMBER
I stare at the white tulle like it’s personally offended me.
And it kind of has.
Well, as much as a piece of fabric can.
It’s hideous.
The ugliest wedding dress I’ve ever seen in my life.
The neckline is so high it’s practically choking me, and the sleeves that cover my arms right down to my wrists, paired with the corset, are more reminiscent of a straitjacket than a dress.
Who the fuck picked this monstrosity?
I smooth my hands down the shapeless skirt and sigh.
This is not how I imagined my wedding day.
Well, actually, that’s kind of a lie. I never really considered my wedding day at all because I assumed I wouldn’t have one. But if I had been one of those little girls, imagining how I would choose my dress and walk down the aisle to a man who loved me, this is not what I would have dreamed up.
Not even close.
I lift my arm to swipe a layer of lip gloss onto my too-pale lips.
Something that’s become glaringly apparent since I was shoved into this room to get ready is that the doctor didn’t think it was necessary to use anything to numb my cervix before he pulled the IUD out.
When I had it put in, I had no feeling until the following day. But this time, no such luck.
Asshole.
Deciding it’s as good as it gets, I lower myself to the corner of the bed and allow my eyes to trail over my face. Even with the makeup that they provided, I’m too pale, and it’s obvious even to my own eyes that I’ve lost weight.
When was the last time they gave me food?
It had to be at least a couple of days ago, and the only water I’ve been given has been sparse as well.
I lean forward and drop my head into my hands. This can’t be how I go out. Can it?
After everything I’ve done, everything I’ve fought for, I’m still being forced into a marriage I don’t want.
What was the point of it all?
I swallow down the despair that tries to wash over me.
It’s not over until it’s over. There’s still a chance…until there isn’t.
Something niggles in the back of my mind, and my entire body tenses.
Elsie said there are more blades around here. That she hid them all over the place.
Without hesitation, I drop to my knees and press my fingers along the edge of the base of the bed.
When that comes up empty, I eye the bedside table and follow the same motion. Why didn’t I ask about the locations of others when I had the chance?
I round the bed and try the other side, but when that comes up empty as well, my shoulders drop as hope begins to fade.
Was it too much to think she might have hidden more than one in here?
The picture frame in the corner catches my eye, and I step toward it more out of instinct than decision. The ugly flower painting inside is generic and cheap, but there’s something about it that calls to me.
The glass has been removed, but when I pluck it off the wall and find a blade taped against the plywood, I could cry with relief.
Footsteps in the hallway tell me I’m running out of time, and I quickly shove the blade into the top of my dress, ignoring the bite of pain when it nicks me as I hang the painting back onto the wall.
By the time the door swings open, I’m twirling the tulle around in front of the mirror like any other blushing bride would.
It’s not over until it’s over. And I’m not ready to give up just yet.
C ain marches me up the same flight of stairs he did earlier and straight out into the blistering afternoon sun.
The sudden burst of bright light forces my eyes shut, but he doesn’t slow down as he drags me toward the black SUV parked a few yards away.
I trip over the dress with every step I take, but he doesn’t seem to notice, or maybe he just doesn’t care.
“No more funny business,” he growls as he shoves me toward the back door, and I barely manage to catch myself.
I glance back at him before tugging the door open and climbing inside. Even such a small amount of activity has my body heaving, and I curse how much fitness I’ve lost in less than a week.
I meet Lucas’s eye across the car a moment before they drag over me hungrily.
“A perfect whore in virginal white,” he murmurs to himself before returning his attention to his phone.
I force myself to relax against the soft leather seats and watch as the city flies by out the window.
There are so many memories here I would rather forget, especially as we pass the derelict building where Travis and I spent our first night on the streets all those years ago.
But this is also where I fell in love, where I fell apart and was put back together again.
Wherever Lucas decides we’re going after the wedding, I’ll miss Los Angeles and everything it gave me.
“Have you decided where we’re moving?” I ask quietly.
Lucas turns his attention to me, amusement glimmering in his eyes. “I thought we might take a honeymoon. The doc said it might take a bit to knock you up, so I thought I’d spend a few weeks working on that, and then we’ll have to wait and see.”
Nausea rolls over me at the thought of being stuck under Lucas for days on end. God, that sounds worse than torture.
“Why are you so desperate to get me pregnant straight away?”
“I need an heir. I told you that.”
“But why? We’re leaving LA. You’re going to be starting again. You don’t even have an empire to pass on to an heir right now.”
Anger replaces the amusement, and before I can blink, he’s on me. His body presses mine against the door, and my neck aches from the angle he has me pinned in.
“That’s none of your concern, Ember. You will be my wife, the mother of my children, and a set of warm holes for me to fuck when I feel like it.
That’s it. You are not my partner. You are nothing,” he spits.
The onslaught is a world away from the conversation I had with Orion the morning before this whole ordeal began.
He offered me the world, any position I wanted, anything I wanted.
And here I am with a man who just wants a pretty wife and baby farm.
Oh, how far I’ve fallen.
I just wish I’d realized how good I had it before it was too late.