Epilogue
-I don't want to leave.
One week in Baltimore is not enough. I stretch out on the huge bed as the automatic blinds open. On the other side seagulls fly over a still-sleeping bay.
-We'll be back soon, I promise. Now don't be lazy and go upstairs, the plane won't wait.
I jump naked without worrying about cellulite or stretch marks. I am the same last night and the same tomorrow. I no longer worry about what I can't change. Living in the moment is more pleasurable.
-Before my kiss.
Blake grabs me around the waist and lifts me up until we are face to face. He lifts me up not because I am short but because my sexual intensity is of concentrated height.
My mouth collides with his with the power of the tenth kiss in the moments before sex. That one that bites desperately and goes for more.
-We are late...
I smile powerfully as I watch his equilibrium lose its balance to the desire to have me under his body again. Again.
-And that?
I let go of his collar to approach the bear lying on top of his suitcase.
-Rainbow?
- It's Love. And it's yours.
-How?
Blake sits on the bed and drags me over his legs. The bear accompanies me.
-My mother gave him to us. Rainbow was my bear. This is Love. And it's yours.
-Love... Love... Love...
I repeat over and over again searching in my head. I wrinkle my nose. My head presses against my temple. Cloudy memories clear.
-A child... I remember a child holding the stuffed animal. He was crying and I... gave it to him," Blake caresses my face with an emotional look in his eyes. I had the same dream many times. The little boy crying and me giving Rainbow to him.
-It wasn't a dream. And it wasn't Rainbow," she says, tucking my hair behind my ear. My mother bought it for us. Rainbow was for me. Love was yours. You grew up and I started calling you after the bear because you were just as cute and cuddly. When your grandmother came I was so heartbroken that you came over and gave Love to me. You took Rainbow. With your little voice that could barely speak you asked me not to cry, you said you would take care of him and I should take care of Love. Until...
-Let's meet again. I woke up repeating those words.
Her black eyes sparkle with a depth that I just understood. Her glow was more than sex or infatuation. Her gaze was that of a love that was never lost.
-Now you are seeing me.
-It wasn't out of gratitude or for the inheritance," I say, confused.
-No. When the car carrying you started, I screamed at the top of my lungs.
-Until we meet again...
-And I found you.
Her forehead rests on mine. Love is in the middle of both of us. The empty embraces I always felt unfulfilled are filled by him. I feel complete. My cycle closes and my present opens the doors to my future. This is my sky, these are my feelings and this is my mandala. My name is Sofia and I am the young girl who finally learned to paint.