Chapter Eighteen Bulldog
Receiving that call from Cannon was unexpected and hit a mix of all the emotions that I think I can feel.
I am excited to meet and see my new grandbabies, I am scared for Peyton and everything that is going to come with this process, the babies being born this early and everything I have to face with the fact that my beautiful wife will not be meeting these babies.
I hate that thought and I want to shut out that thought before I get too deep into all those thoughts that are dark and I have been trying to put out of my mind by burying myself into finding the twins and finding these assholes that are trying to hurt my family.
The people who have already hurt my family.
We booked the earliest flight I could get and that was for a few hours after I got the call.
I told both Cooper and Cannon to keep me posted on what is going on and so far I have heard that they are in the hospital and still waiting for information about what is happening.
When we got to North Carolina, since Devil’s Hollow is an hour outside of Charlotte.
When we grab our bags we head out to the front of the airport where I knew someone from Untamed will be waiting.
When Davis, Tillie and I get to the exit we see the future president of the Untamed Rebels National chapter standing there waiting for us.
Tillie runs to him and throws herself in his arms and he picks her up and she wraps her little legs and arms around him.
“Callum!” Davis says as he walks up to my nephew and they give each other a side hug because he can’t give him an actual hug because my little spider monkey isn’t going to let go of her cousin.
They might have not known The Evans their whole lives because of the messed up circumstances we have, but they sure welcomed them with open arms.
They really have all become close. I have loved getting to know all of my new nieces and nephews as well.
We definitely talk regularly. Callum has come to the club many times to hang out with his cousin and to see how our club operates compared to his.
The same goes for all of them. We have housed them all many times.
Especially after everything that happened with Missy.
They have all come and gone many times..
I am glad that I met this part of my family and a little upset that I never got to meet them earlier.
“Uncle Devin, how are you holding up?”
“I’m hanging in there, Callum. Thank you for coming up and grabbing us.You heard anything about what’s going on?”
“It’s no problem, you guys are family.” He says as he rubs Tillie’s back. “I haven’t heard anything about what is going on, but they might have messaged me since I got here. Might have even messaged you.”
I pull out my phone as we walk to the car making sure to grab Tillie’s bag and put it over my shoulder with mine. Sure enough after I turn my phone on I get several messages flooding my phone.
Cannon: Knox just came out and told all of us that Peyton had to go into a c-section to safely have the triplets. He said that she told him that he had to stay with the babies so he wanted to get Cooper to sit with Peyton until she can go and see the babies.
Gavin: I sent Callum to pick you up at the airport. I hope you guys get here safely. We will keep your family safe while you are on the way, brother.
Luca: Give Peyton our love, we will come visit when we can.
Tanner: Heard Peyton is in labor and you left to go there with Tills and Davis. Travel safe dad, give her my love.
I have another text from Cane and some of the brothers from the club. I will text them all back later right now. I just want to get to my daughter and meet my new grandbabies. As I get in the truck I hear my phone ping with a text message.
Cooper: Thought you’d want to see your grandbabies.
They are gorgeous. I know you are going to see them in person, but wanted to send you a little something for you to see before you get here.
Ronan Colt Miller in the red cap, Rebel Skye Miller in the pink cap and Rowan Knox Miller in the black cap.
Aren’t they beautiful? Peyton is doing well, I’m with her now.
She will be glad when you get here. Hopefully by the time you get here she will get to see the babies.
Attached he sent me multiple pictures of my beautiful grandbabies and they are so very small, but they are so beautiful.
“Look guys, Cooper sent me some pictures of the babies, do you want to see?”
“Yes please daddy! I want to see the babies! What did she have?”
I pass the phone back to Tillie and tell her that they had two boys and a girl.
“Why do they have all that stuff on them? Are they okay?”
I turn around and look at my little girl as she is looking at the pictures and showing Davis.
“They babies were born a little too early, so they weren’t all ready to come out. So they need all those things to help them breathe and to help them grow big and strong. They should be able to be off all that and home in no time. They are Jacobson's, they are strong.”
I smile at Tillie to let her know that it is all going to be okay.
We arrive at the hospital an hour later and I’m hoping that Peyton has been able to see the triplets by now.
I know it has been awhile since they said she got out of surgery and was hanging out in her room.
We walk up towards the front desk and I ask the nurses about my daughters room and they give me her room number.
We head that way to check and see if she is in there before we head towards the NICU to see if she is there.
We get to the room and sure enough I am informed Peyton has gone to the NICU to see her babies.
The nurse who made no attempt to hide the fact that she was checking me out, which I felt dirty about.
My wife would normally make jokes and pick on me as this was happening if she was here.
Right now it feels wrong and I hate how unprofessional the whole thing is.
Here I am seeing my daughter and grandbabies with two of my children and a ring on my finger and this woman is trying to make a pass at me.
I ignore it all as we come up to the NICU doors.
“Thank you, we don’t need your help anymore.”
I say to her and she smiles at me and says if I need anything she’s right at the desk. I didn’t reply and turned to look into the window of the NICU in search of my girl. As I am standing looking around the doors open and Whip exits.
“Hey, Bulldog. Glad you got here safely. Peyton and Knox are in there with the babies. Do you want to go in and I can stay out here with Tillie and Davis. Then maybe they can switch off with you.”
I nod my head and look at my kids, “Are you guys going to be good here with Cooper while I go see the babies? You guys can take turns after I come back out, okay?”
Tillie and Davis both nod their heads and I walk through the doors washing my hands then placing on a gown over my clothes.
I walk down the isles until I come to where Peyton is sitting in a chair with a button down shirt on while holding a baby with skin to skin.
Knox is over in another chair, with a similar situation going on.
They are both so into what they are holding that they do not notice me coming in.
I pull my phone out and take pictures of both of them.
“So who do we have here?” I walk up towards Peyton and put my hand on her shoulder.
She looks up at me and smiles. “This is Ronan.”
I look down at the tiny little baby she has bundled up on her chest. He has all the tubes and things on him, but he is still so beautiful.
“He is beautiful, baby girl. You did so good. Who does Knox have?”
“He has Rebel. She’s got her two daddies wrapped around her finger already. Cooper was holding her and Knox was holding Rowan before you got here.”
I look at the little crib that is in between Knox and Peyton, “Is this little Rowan right here?”
She smiles, “Yeah daddy, it is.”
I stand up at the crib and look down at the baby and then over at the two babies.
Being here and seeing these beautiful babies and seeing Peyton become a mom hits me in ways I didn’t realize it would.
I walk around and sit in the chair next to one of the babies’ cribs and put my head in my hands.
Missy should be here, Missy should be meeting her beautiful grandbabies for the first time and she should be sitting here helping Peyton with her babies and becoming a mother.
None of this is right. None of it. As the tears start to fall down my face, I stand up and walk towards the exit.
“Daddy, where are you going?”
I turn and look at my little girl tears in my eyes, trying to keep it all together so that I can get out of here before I explode, “I’ve got to go baby, but your brother and sister, they are here and they are going to come in and meet their niece and nephews, okay?”
She looks at me and you can tell that she is worried.
She nods her head and I walk out of the NICU.
I leave the room and Cooper looks up at me and I’m not sure what he sees on my face, but he looks over at Tillie and Davis and tells them to head inside and wash their hands and put on a gown.
Once they are inside he comes over to me.
He hands me the keys to his bike. Taking them and giving him a nod, I head for the exit of the hospital.
Getting to Cooper’s bike and starting it I head out of the parking lot trying to find somewhere to get away from this pain I am feeling.
The hurt that has hit me in a way I didn’t want it to.
I’ve been keeping it all together for the kids and for everyone else.
All of this is my fault. I should’ve kept her with me at all times.
I should’ve never let anyone out of my sight.
This bastard who thinks that everything I have is his, he took my wife from me, he took the mother of my children.
He destroyed the one thing that has held me together for years.
The woman that owned my heart and part of my soul and now she is missing out on the most important part of Peyton’s life.
She’s missing out on all these things and she is going to miss out on the other kids having babies, she’s going to miss Davis and Tillie’s graduations, and then getting married.
She’ll never see Davis get his patch, none of it.
These three babies will never get to meet their MiMi and never know the love she had for them even before they were born.
She will never experience being with MiMi making Christmas cookies or her crazy obsession with buying so many presents for holidays and birthdays none of it.
As all these thoughts keep running through I speed up on the bike and continue heading towards the clubhouse.
I know they have a gym in their basement and I think I need to beat the fuck out of something or someone.
Pulling through the gate at the Untamed clubhouse I park Coop’s bike and head inside.
As I walk inside everyone turns and looks at me like they were waiting for me.
I bypass everyone and head towards their basement.
I see a couple of the Untamed guys are brawling in the ring and I take off my cut, throw it on a hook they have by the ring and remove my shirt. I head towards the ring and get ready to jump in when I hear an order yelled out.
“Rune, Haze head out.”
I turn and look standing there are my two big brothers Grim and Riot.
I watch as Rune and Haze leave the ring and grab hold of their shirts and their cuts. As Grim and Riot take off their cuts and shirts hanging them by mine. I wait in the center of the ring for Grim to come in.
“So how are we going to do this? You need to kick some ass, then let’s go. You’ve got the both of us.”
Then for the next two hours I exchange blows with my brothers.
Finally after we all look like we have been through the ringer bleeding and black eyes, I sit down in the middle of the ring with my legs up and my arms resting on my knees.
Grim sits down next to me on one side and on the other side Riot sits down.
I guess being with just them they are just Garrett and Gavin.
“So Devin, what’s going on? Talk to us, you went to see the triplets and obviously something happened. Tell us what’s going on.”
“What’s going on Gavin, is that I went to see the triplets without my wife.
Without the one person who should’ve been there to see them.
She should’ve been there to see Peyton after she had the babies.
Offering advice and just being there for her and she’s missing everything.
How can I do this? How can I go on and witness all these life events while knowing the one person who was supposed to be there standing beside me is gone?
How could someone take away a wife, a mother, a woman who did nothing to them.
She didn’t ask to be brought into this life, she never asked for any of this.
That asshole, the one that shares our blood, the one that grew up thinking he deserved something, he took my fucking wife away from me!
He stole all these moments we were supposed to have together!
I can’t get any of these things back! Seeing Peyton’s babies for the first time alone when I should’ve been with her!
This shouldn’t have fucking happened! They were quiet, they were after the club!
Who the fuck goes after women and children!
Who the fuck takes away a mother from their children and imagine what she was feeling and what she went through before she died!
The last fucking this she felt was those bastards taking from her, destroying her!
This is my fault. I never should’ve let her go anywhere with just one man after they first tried to take her from me.
I never should’ve allowed her to be without extra security.
This is on me. I fucked and cost my children their mother and all the moments they could’ve had with her, that they should’ve had with her!”
Garrett puts his hand on my shoulder, “Devin, we all know what this life does. Missy, she knew what came with this life. Yeah she wasn’t born into it, but she knew what being with you meant. All this, this is not on you,
it’s on that asshole who thinks he is something special because of who his mama fucked. Who is mama trapped. He doesn’t get to do these things just because he thinks he should’ve had your life, he was never gonna have your life Devin. Him taking Missy was the coward's way out,
he knew he couldn’t get to anyone else because he is weak. He chose to hit you in a place that was going to hurt you the most. Missy would’ve never wanted more men on her and you know it. She also wouldn’t want you to blame yourself for this. You’ve got enough going on.”
“Yeah well, my family is lost. Sophie is in a place where she won’t even see or talk to her family. I can’t find the twins and I don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve got everybody looking every which way and even that feels like it’s not enough.”
“Devin, you are not a superhero. You are doing all you can. We know Sophie will get over blaming you. She is just looking for the easy target and that’s how she’s handling her grief because she knows she can be mad at you and you’ll still be there.
One day she’s going to wake up and she’s not going to be angry anymore. But you have to stop blaming yourself. We are going to find these assholes and when we do, we are going to help you kill every last one of them.”