Whisk Me Away

Chapter Fifteen

Regan wasn’t really into the movie she’d chosen to watch, probably because she was barely paying attention. Between checking her phone for messages from Ava to letting her mind wander off in wonder of what Ava might be doing/saying/thinking at any given moment, she was useless.

She closed the laptop with a sigh, put it away, and went into the bathroom to take care of her nightly routine. Face freshly scrubbed and teeth brushed, she climbed into her bed and turned off the light. It was earlier than she usually went to sleep here at the retreat, but she was sad and stressed and just wanted the day to be over. Clearly, Ava was having a blast out with Vienna if she wasn’t yet home, three hours later.

Lying on her back in her bed in the dark, she thought about Ava coming home and being unable to see a thing. With an irritated groan, she threw off the covers, crossed the room, and clicked on the small lamp on Ava’s nightstand, cursing herself for giving a shit whether Ava tripped over her shoes or ran into the bed. She yanked the covers up and turned onto her side to face away from the door.

Unsure how much time had passed once she’d started to drift off, she was startled awake by the click of the door opening. She heard the rustling of clothing and figured Ava was changing into her pajamas. Closing her eyes again, she focused on slowing her mind and going back to sleep.

That’s when she felt weight on her mattress. Ava slid under the covers and nestled close to Regan’s back, spooning her.

She was naked.

It didn’t make Regan proud to know that the simple touch of Ava’s skin was enough to wake up her entire nervous system, but that’s exactly what happened. Ava’s hips pushed against her ass, Ava’s breasts pressed into her back, and Ava’s hand slid from her outer thigh, over her hip, across her stomach, and up under her shirt to cup a breast and toy with a nipple. Regan couldn’t stay quiet, a soft moan leaking out of her. She grasped Ava’s hand, stopping it, and turned to look her in the eye.

What she saw shocked her.

She saw sorrow. She saw regret. She saw apology. She saw desire.

And she saw something else she didn’t want to think about.

“I’m sorry,” Ava whispered into the dim light of the room. “I panicked.”

“I know,” Regan whispered back. “It’s okay.” And it was. Just like that, it was.

Those were the only words spoken before Ava’s mouth crushed against hers, kissing her with knowledge, passion, and want. Ava shifted so she was mostly on top of Regan, and she shoved Regan’s shirt up to reveal her breasts, staring at them so hungrily Regan was sure she could actually feel her eyes, feel them sliding along her skin and rolling her nipples, and then Ava bent forward and took one into her mouth and sucked so hard, Regan thought she might pass out from the pleasure of it. She held tightly to Ava’s hips as they slid along her thigh, leaving a trail of wetness on Regan’s skin.

Sex with Ava had been incredible up to that point. Indescribably good. Their sexual compatibility was off the charts. But this? Now? Tonight? The charts were left in the dust. There were no charts; they no longer existed. There was only Ava. Her hands, her mouth, her tongue—God, her tongue .

Ava was everywhere. Her hands roamed Regan’s body. They stroked, squeezed, even scratched a little, until Regan was literally writhing beneath her, feeling like she couldn’t get enough. She wanted more but couldn’t articulate a thing because it was all so much. Ava kissed her, with certainty and thoroughness as she cupped a breast in each hand and kneaded. Soft and hard. Stroking and squeezing. Shifting her body, she used her legs to spread Regan’s and then practically dove down between them, devouring her with her mouth, her tongue, her fingers.

All Regan could do was hold on. To anything. She grabbed at the headboard. The covers. Her pillow. No longer able to differentiate between what part of Ava was touching what part of her, she became awash with pleasure. It was all one enormous burst of wonderfulness that took up every inch of her body and soul, and then she was coming. Colors burst behind her eyelids like fireworks as every muscle in her body tightened and she arched up off the bed. Somewhere, vaguely, she could feel Ava holding on to her, but her tongue was still moving, still stroking, still pulling sounds and spasms and absolutely mind-blowing joy from her body. She covered her own face with a pillow, knowing somewhere in her brain that she needed to let it out, and she screamed with pleasure. She didn’t groan. She didn’t whimper. She screamed into the pillow as her body took over, riding out the orgasm as long as possible before her muscles finally gave out and dropped her back to the mattress, like a heavy sack of flour.

“Jesus Christ,” she whispered, panting, eyes still squeezed shut. “Jesus fucking Christ.”

A low chuckle came from between her legs as Ava rested her cheek against Regan’s inner thigh. That was when she realized Ava’s fingers were inside her, and her body contracted once, just to remind her.

“That was amazing,” she managed to croak out. “ You’re amazing.”

“And you are beautiful.” Ava slid her fingers out slowly, causing another small muscle spasm that made Regan gasp a soft laugh.

“Come up here,” she said, body still humming as she turned on her side so she could rest on Ava’s shoulder. Her body felt weighed down, like her limbs were filled with water, suddenly tired. She sighed happily against Ava’s bare skin. “That was…unexpected.”

Ava yawned. “Had to. Couldn’t help it.”

“Hey, I’m not complaining. I was just surprised.” They should talk about this. Regan wanted to talk about it. But she also wanted to simply hold Ava, to enjoy feeling her weight, her skin, listen to her soft breathing—

Shit.

Ava was already asleep. And while Regan really wanted to have a discussion—because what were they doing? And what were they going to do when the retreat ended in less than two weeks?—she also couldn’t bear to wake Ava up. This was a time she loved, this post-lovemaking cuddle, this closeness. This was the time when the feelings she knew she was developing for Ava settled warmly inside her and snuggled up, keeping her from moving, keeping her from even wanting to move.

She inhaled deeply and let it out in a long, slow breath.

Talking could wait.

* * *

Regan woke up alone.

Sun streamed through the window, which caused her to lie there, face in the pillow, and blink in confusion for a moment. She was rarely in bed when the sun rose, but this retreat had messed with her usual schedule…not to mention all the sex she’d been having. Her body was clearly exhausted if it was now letting her sleep past sunrise.

The bathroom door was open, the light off. Ava’s bed was still neatly made. Reaching her hand to the other side of the bed told her it was cool; Ava must’ve left a while ago. Her fingers brushed a piece of paper, and she lifted her head to examine it.

You looked too peaceful to wake up.

Went for a run.

Ava

She’d signed her name with a crudely drawn heart next to it, and it made Regan smile as she rolled over onto her back and reached for her phone on the nightstand. It buzzed with a text as she held it in her hand. Kiki.

Checking in. How’s things?

The relief Regan felt confused her at first, but then she realized that Kiki was part of her regular life. That she represented normal in a time when normal seemed really far away from her grasp, and for whatever reason, she needed to touch normal right now.

Hey, you , she typed back. Getting off work or heading in?

The gray dots bounced as Kiki typed her answer. Just got home. Rough night.

Regan knew better than to ask for details. Rough night usually meant she’d lost a patient. Maybe more than one. But Regan didn’t push. Kiki would give her details if and when she was ready to, so she simply said I’m sorry with a sad emoji.

Cheer me up. Tell me about all the sex you’re having. That was followed by an eggplant emoji, which made Regan laugh because Kiki used it to refer to anything that had to do with sex, even if it was between two women with no “eggplants” involved.

She sent back a sweating emoji, a sun emoji, and anything else she could find that might represent the word hot .

Wow! was Kiki’s response. That’s a lot. I was half expecting you to tell me it had ended.

Regan didn’t want to text. She wanted to talk. She grabbed a shirt and threw it on since she was still naked from last night’s session, and then she hit the FaceTime icon. She gave Kiki no time to say anything when her face appeared on the screen, she simply said, “It has not stopped. If anything, it has increased. She came in last night after dinner and didn’t say a word, just basically ripped my clothes off.” Even saying the words and remembering the previous night started her center throbbing and made her skin flush with heat. She swallowed.

Kiki squinted into the phone. “Oh my God, I can see it on your face. It’s right there, plain as can be. She’s gotten to you. You like her, don’t you?” Kiki’s tone was a combination of shocked disbelief and gentle happiness.

Trying to lie, or even downplay, to Kiki was useless. She knew Regan too well and could read her like a book. All Regan could do was sigh, and then, to her fucking horror, her body betrayed her and her eyes welled up.

“Oh, honey,” Kiki said, pushing her face close to the screen. “You do like her. It’s okay. Don’t cry.” The reason Kiki had become a nurse in the first place was her innate desire to help people, so the teasing was shoved aside to make room for genuine concern. Her voice went soft. “I assume she’s not there with you. Can you tell me what’s going on?”

The wetness had decided not to stay in her eyes, and she swiped at her cheek. “You’re right. I just really like her,” she said quietly, then cleared her throat. “It’s been a long time since I trusted somebody, you know?”

“Believe me, I know.” Kiki’s smile was gentle, a reminder that she’d been there through Regan’s last disaster of a relationship with a woman who wouldn’t know faithfulness if it walked up to her on the street and slapped her across the face. “What makes you trust this one? I mean, you’re not in the most ideal of circumstances.”

Regan nodded. “That’s true. And I don’t even know what it is. Maybe it was her owning up to what happened all those years ago and feeling bad about it? I’m not sure.” A sigh. A gaze off toward the window. “All I know is that I’d like to see her after this is all over with. Keep seeing her, I mean.”

“Have you talked about that?”

“Not yet.” Regan shook her head. “I meant to last night, but…” She rolled her lips in and smothered a grin.

“Got a little busy, did you?” Kiki laughed.

“ So busy.”

“Where is she now?”

“She went for a run while I was still asleep. Left me a note.”

“Does it have a heart on it?”

“It does.”

Kiki barked a laugh. “OMG, you two have it bad.”

And now Regan was laughing, too. “Right? It’s outrageous how this has all transpired.”

“It really is.” Kiki’s expression slid back into seriousness. “Just be careful, love. Okay? I know you really like her, but take care of you, yeah?”

“Yeah. I will. Promise.”

They caught up on a few more things and then Regan spent a hilarious moment talking to Artie on FaceTime. The cat could not have looked more bored if he’d tried, and it only made Regan laugh. She finally said her goodbyes and hung up, and not two minutes later, the door opened and Ava walked in.

Jesus fucking Christ.

Flushed and glistening and still a teeny bit out of breath, and holy shit, Ava looked good enough to eat.

“Nope.” Ava held up a finger and chuckled softly. “I know that look, but I ran into both Becca and Hadley downstairs and they’re both waiting for us so they can help with our big ideas.” She toed off her running shoes, then strode to Regan’s bed and grasped her chin in one hand. “We have no time for hanky-panky.” She kissed Regan’s mouth, and her lips tasted salty. “Sadly.” She headed for the bathroom. “I’m gonna shower.” She stopped with the door almost closed, met Regan’s gaze, and said, “You look really cute when you just wake up.”

The door clicked shut.

Regan flopped back onto the bed with a groan and the goofiest grin on her face. She could feel it. “This woman is gonna be the death of me,” she whispered to the empty room. “I just know it.”

* * *

Hadley had proven to be a good assistant in the kitchen, but she was an even better brainstormer. She and Regan had been in Regan and Ava’s room for the whole morning and well into the afternoon, trying to come up with a bake that represented her joy in July Fourth for tomorrow’s contest.

They’d finalized their idea around four o’clock.

“I think this is gonna be awesome,” Hadley said, sifting through the papers spread out on the floor between the foot of Regan’s bed and the foot of Ava’s.

Regan scanned them all: lists, sketches, idea notes, visualizing the cake, the cream puffs, the tiny apple pies, the sugar art…It was a lot. But if they could pull it off, it’d be amazing. A July Fourth picnic made of desserts, complete with a lawn, an American flag with rainbow stripes to add some Pride, a picnic table, and fireworks.

“Baked art isn’t my forte,” Regan said. “I’m better at standard desserts that look like they’re supposed to, not like something else entirely.” She looked up at Hadley and grinned. “But if we can pull this off, it’s gonna be pretty fucking cool.”

“We can totally pull it off.” Hadley held up a hand for a high five, and Regan slapped it. “Nice work, Chef.”

“We’ll see.” Regan started piling the papers and closed her laptop. “I’m starving. Food?”

“Are you kidding? My stomach has started eating itself.”

Regan tossed their work in a haphazard pile on her bed and they headed downstairs.

The teams had scattered that morning. Vienna was in her and Maia’s room, while Maia was in the living room to the right of the stairs. Paige and her assistant sat at one end of the dining room table, and through the window, Regan could see Ava and Becca sitting in the grass, a laptop in Ava’s lap and a notebook in Becca’s. They weren’t close enough for Regan to make out expressions, other than Ava wasn’t exactly smiling, but then Becca said something and gave her a nudge and there was that smile.

The buffet table had an array of food and drinks, from sandwiches and chips to cookies and muffins. Bottles of water, cans of soda, beer, and wine were also available, the wine on the buffet, the bottles and cans in a large bucket of ice on its own stand next to it. Regan grabbed a bottle of water first, cracked it open, and took a long drink from it, not realizing just how thirsty she was until the first sip hit her lips. Chocolate chip muffin in hand, she sat down at the table just as Paige closed her notebook and smiled at her assistant, whose name Regan couldn’t pull from her brain.

“Success?” she asked.

Paige shrugged and gave her an uncertain smile. “I think so? What about you two?”

Hadley sat down next to her with a bag of potato chips and a Coke. “We’re gonna kick ass tomorrow.”

“Wow,” said Paige’s assistant. Violet! Regan thought. That was her name. “Pretty sure of yourself.”

Hadley looked to Regan, then back. “Yup.” She sipped from her Coke, watching Violet the entire time. Okay, so a bit of competition between the assistants, I see.

Maia and her assistant, who Regan did remember was named Rose—she took a second to be amused that two of the assistants had flower names—came in from the living room just as the front door opened and Ava and Becca entered.

“Looks like we all needed about the same amount of time,” Madison said in her usually cheerful tone. “How are we feeling about our projects?”

Responses were varied, from grumbles to nods to excitement.

Ava met Regan’s gaze and smiled gently, then nearly knocked over her water onto her laptop, catching it at the very last minute. “Okay, I’m gonna take this up before I destroy it by accident.”

Becca smiled at her. “I’ll do it.”

“You sure?” Ava asked. Becca had been doing small favors and things for her since the retreat had begun, and Ava had mentioned to Regan that she didn’t want to take advantage, especially when they weren’t in the kitchen.

“Absolutely. You chill. Be right back.” And with that, Becca grabbed the laptop and headed for the stairs.

Vienna and Bethany came in just then, Vienna jerking a thumb over her shoulder. “That girl almost took me out on the stairs.” But she shook her head and laughed softly, which made Regan happy. Vienna had seemed a bit…on edge for the past week or so, and seeing her smile was a nice change.

Vienna grabbed herself an apple and sat down next to Ava, then bumped her with a shoulder. Ava grinned at her, and it was clear to Regan that a friendship had deepened with their dinner the night before.

“What time did Liza say the fireworks were?” Madison asked.

“Not until after dark,” said Paige, who checked her watch. Then she sighed and looked around the table. “I was gonna ask if anybody wanted to go out to happy hour, but I’m freaking exhausted.” She laughed gently.

“Me too,” Madison added. “I say we stay put. We can make our own happy hour.” She met the faces of the assistants. “You guys are staying for the fireworks, right?” When they nodded, she continued. “Yeah, so let’s do our own happy hour and have dinner and just chill. It’s our day off and we have to work tomorrow, so let’s relax. Yeah?”

The room agreed and Regan had to force herself to be outwardly cheerful. Not that she didn’t want to hang out more with her fellow pastry chefs. She did. But she knew what she really wanted was more alone time with Ava, and she also knew she had to calm the hell down and also participate in the retreat. It was why she was there in the first place.

Take a breath, Callahan. She’ll still be in the same bed with you tonight.

Smiling and shaking her head at her own self-deprecation, she looked up and met Ava’s eyes across the table. Her expression was knowing, and it occurred to Regan that Ava might actually be feeling the same way. It was something she hadn’t really thought about, and it made her warm from the inside.

Becca arrived and sat back in her chair.

“You get lost up there?” Ava teased.

Becca blushed slightly. “I used your bathroom. Hope you don’t mind.”

Ava shrugged and then May came into the room and got their attention. She filled them in on dinner, the schedule for the night and the next day, and then exited just as silently as she’d arrived.

“I swear to God, I’ve seen her in a horror movie,” Maia whispered, eyes wide as the others laughed.

Vienna had a bottle of wine in one hand, corkscrew in the other. “Who’s in?” she asked.

And the night off began.

* * *

It was clear that nobody really ended up cutting loose that night. There was plenty to drink. Lots of wine, loads of beer, even a small bar set up on the patio with a small assortment of liquors. But Regan noticed the retreat attendees seemed to be a bit more serious about tomorrow’s bake. Was it because there were less than two weeks left in the retreat itself and they wanted to make the best final impressions they could? Or was it because in less than two weeks, one of them was going to be a hundred grand richer, and they wanted to have a clear head for the work ahead?

No idea. All she knew, as she nursed her second glass of wine, was that she’d mellowed nicely, her body feeling warm and relaxed. She’d noticed, though, that Ava seemed the tiniest bit…she wasn’t sure of the right word. Worried? Concerned? Stressed? Some variation of one of those things? She poured another glass of wine and carried it over to her.

“You okay?” she asked quietly, handing her the glass.

Ava grimaced as she took it, and somewhere in Regan’s mind came the comment that even when she was unhappy—frowning or grimacing—Ava was still fucking stunning. A shake of Ava’s head had her looking more worried. “I’m not thrilled with the idea Becca and I came up with for tomorrow.”

Regan wasn’t proud of the relief that coursed through her right then, knowing Ava’s stress wasn’t about her. Or them. “I’m sure it’s fine.”

Ava sipped the wine and gave it a moment before saying with softly steel words, “I don’t want fine, though. I want great. I want spectacular. And what we have isn’t it.” She took another sip, then groaned, her irritation clear. “I’m better than this, damn it.”

“Can I help in some way?” Regan hated seeing her like this. Uncertain and frustrated. Doubting herself.

Her offer seemed to land where it was needed, and she could see Ava’s shoulders relax just a little. When she met Regan’s gaze, it was with a soft smile as she reached out and ran her hand down Regan’s arm. “No. That wouldn’t be fair. But I appreciate you offering. You’re very sweet.” She leaned against her a bit, just enough for Regan to feel it, and blew out a breath. “I’m just gonna have to suck it up and work on it tonight until I come up with something I feel better about. I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry about?”

“That we won’t get a chance for some time tonight.” Ava’s voice was very soft, her expression saying she was very aware of those around them and their proximity.

Regan lowered her voice to match. “Babe, you do what you need to do. Don’t worry about me. You want to feel confident going into tomorrow. I get that.” She waited until Ava looked at her again and said, “I’m a big girl.”

Ava’s smile of relief was all she needed. The night righted itself just as the first fireworks were shot off. A collective gasp went around the yard as the retreaters, the assistants, and even the remaining staff stopped what they were doing to gather in the yard, sit on blankets, and watch.

Regan had snagged an extra blanket from their room, and now she spread it out on the grass for her and Ava. Vienna and Maia sat next to them on one side, the others behind them, and they all lifted their faces to the sky.

Vienna leaned close and said under her breath, “For a private display, this is pretty goddamn good.”

Ava nodded and Regan had to agree.

Apparently, so did Madison. “These are some pretty impressive fireworks,” she said from behind them, just as a huge one burst into a bright green star far above their heads. A couple of assistants sat nearby and vocally agreed, as three fireworks in a row burst above them in red, then white, then blue. The women oohed and aahed and then laughed at the cliché of it.

The display went on for nearly a half hour before the big finale of bangs and booms and flashes that pretty much every fireworks display Regan had ever seen in her life ended with. As she sat there next to Ava, close enough that their thighs and shoulders were touching, and as she covered her ears with both hands, the way she had during the big booms since she was a child, a thought raced through her head on a loop.

There’s nowhere I’d rather be right now.

She looked at Ava, at the colors and light on her face, on her wide eyes and creamy smooth skin and dark hair streaked with red and green from the fireworks above. She saw the soft smile, the gentle lines that smile created in her face, and when she turned that smile to Regan, the thought hit again.

There’s nowhere I’d rather be. Nowhere.

Ava’s expression said she might’ve had an idea what Regan was thinking, but she didn’t have a chance to say so before Becca appeared. She squatted down next to Ava and said something that Regan couldn’t hear over the sound of the fireworks. Ava gave her a nod, then turned to Regan.

“All right, Becca’s got an idea that might be better than what we came up with, so we’re gonna go see if we can hash it out.” She frowned and tipped her head to the side.

“It’s okay,” Regan said, a hand on her arm. “I don’t want you feeling guilty.” She used her chin to gesture toward Becca, who was already heading for the door inside. “Go. Come up with something awesome.”

“Just not as awesome as yours,” Ava teased as she shifted to her knees.

“I mean, I didn’t wanna say…”

Ava leaned in close to her ear and whispered, “I really want to kiss you right now, but I won’t. It’s probably better to leave you wanting anyway.” With a wink, she pushed herself to her feet, waved good night to the others, and went in after Becca.

Regan followed her departure with her eyes, and her gaze was snagged by Maia, who frowned and ran her own fingertip down from an eye in an impression of a tear. Regan playfully smacked her.

“Shut up,” she said but couldn’t keep the smile off her face, no matter how hard she tried. Which wasn’t really very hard.