Chapter 15
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Elodie
I finish pulling weeds in my parents’ garden and stand up, stretching my back. I’m worn out from a day of work. Saturdays are always so busy, and I’ll have more to do at the bakery tonight, but at least I get to be outside. Sighing, I tilt my face to the sun.
Montana summers were something I missed when I was away from home, but since I’ve returned, they slip by.
The page of the calendar changes each month, but my days stay the same.
I was almost to the point of hiring permanent staff.
Now I feel like I just opened all over again and I’m hustling for a customer base.
I need a break. The knowledge is more acute the more I’m with Cruz.
I’m stupidly excited for a picnic tomorrow.
My exhale is more contented than before. I turn around and Clem is watching me, her arms crossed. “Something’s different about you.” She narrows her eyes and stabs a finger in my direction. “You got laid.”
I choke on an answer. “N-no.” Wait. Why am I lying about sleeping with Cruz? “Yes, actually. Several times.”
She squeals and claps her hands. “Mom and Dad have not stopped talking about him since he was over.”
I wouldn’t stop talking about Cruz either if I was willing to have nosy people up in my business. “You talk to them that much?”
She gives me a duh look. “I’m a single woman who works two jobs and writes books, and all my friends are getting married. Yes, I hang out with our parents.”
I’m only slightly relieved that they didn’t need anything while I was indulging in all things Cruz Foster and only called Clem because they’re afraid of bothering me. “I like him a lot.”
“You might’ve had bad taste in men before, but it’s good this time.”
“It was pretty bad before.” I dust the dirt off my garden gloves and slip them off.
“I’m not proud of the things I did with Dwayne.
” I can’t believe I said that, but telling Cruz and getting his acceptance opened a forbidden door.
Without the pressure of keeping it shut, I just want to talk about it all again and relieve some more of the pressure.
“He thought he was—what did Mom use to say? ‘All that and a bag of chips.’ ”
She giggles. “He wasn’t a bag of Doritos?”
“He was the generic plain chips that are almost too salty. Even the sex with him was bland.” Cruz is like the specialty spirits he distills. I never know how it’s going to be, I just know it’ll be good.
“Oh, I definitely get that. Why do you think I started writing romance?”
“I try not to think about your sex life.”
She throws her hands up. “There’s nothing to think about—that’s the problem. I don’t care if it’s missionary for life, I just need it to blow my socks off.”
“You also don’t want missionary for life.”
She exhales a gusty sigh. “I want to be pinned against a wall. Upside down. Spun like a top. I don’t care. I just can’t take another guy who keeps his socks on during sex.”
I snort out a laugh and keep giggling. “You know, I never met him. Jake?”
“Mom and Dad did. Mom faked her vertigo and went to her bedroom to knit. Said he was boring.”
Mom has listened to Dad’s architecture geek-outs and fishing stories for decades. Jake must’ve been more than boring. “Oh, Clem. I hope you find your romance hero. No more socks-on Jake.”
Her lips curve up. “Me too. But until then, I’m glad we’re finally talking about more than how we’re going to clean and pull weeds for our parents.”
My mood dips. “I’m so ashamed that I’ve been afraid to talk about it.”
Her brows draw together and worry lights her eyes. “Why? It’s me.”
I shake my head and scan the yard in case our parents snuck outside.
They’re both usually milling around, doing some extra work, but Dad mowed today, and he’s tuckered out.
Mom still gets headaches from her fall, so Clem and I chased her back inside.
Yet I don’t want to sit on the porch and risk them overhearing.
I plant myself on a big rock that we used to play on when we were young, and Dad was mowing and wanted us out of the way. “I’m the oldest. I’m not supposed to be the fuckup.”
She barks out a laugh. “You are not a fuckup. You own a business and everyone adores the work you do.”
“I used to scam people. On a small scale. Mostly.” My heart pounds once, twice, thumping harder the longer she stays silent.
“I don’t believe it,” she finally says.
“For drinks and food. I’d go with Dwayne when women would pay for his vacations.”
Her eyes go wide. “They do that?”
“There’s a lot of loneliness out there. The best thing that happened to me”—until Cruz swaggered into the bakery—“was when Dwayne got arrested. It ended up being for drugs. So stupid, but he was greedy to a fault. Ugh, I should’ve known better.”
She fists her hands at her sides. “Quit taking responsibility for a grown man. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Why didn’t I tell my sister in graduate school that her older sister was conning meals out of men who bought me food because I let them think they could fuck me later?”
“Yes! What’d you think I’d do? Cut you out of my life?”
“It’s a small town. I wasn’t going to tell anyone. What if Mom or Dad let something slip and word got around? All they’d have to say is my ex is in prison and people would find out details for themselves. I run a business and everyone trusts me. I was complicit.”
“Then why didn’t you get arrested?”
“I almost did once.”
“Elodie!”
Humiliation burns in my stomach. “Honestly, it’s amazing I’m not in jail, but ultimately, the asshole thought he was so smooth, keeping me so controlled that he didn’t let me very far into his life.
He had to use his name for the restaurant, but he made me put the apartment in my name.
Same with the accounts he hid the retirees’ money in, which I sent back.
” And that landed me in the situation I’m in now, but I wasn’t taking anything else from people I didn’t earn. “I don’t want anyone to know.”
“What about Cruz?”
“I told him.” Most of it. He’s done enough for me.
If I tell him about the blackmail, he’ll park himself in the bakery every second of every day, with his sleeves rolled up and his apron on.
Or worse, he’ll track Damon down and revert to the version of Cruz Foster he’s ashamed of.
I’m not putting him in that position ever.
I dig out my phone and check the time. “I’ve gotta get back and prep for tomorrow.” I need to do admin stuff before I can’t hold up my eyelids anymore. “I’ve got a picnic date with Cruz tomorrow night.”
She yanks me into a big hug. “You only leave that bakery to do more work. I’m so glad he’s forcing you to live again.”
I smile and embrace her back, but I can’t fight off the melancholy settling in. Cruz is giving me a taste of how much I’ve been missing, but until I can stop the blackmail, that’s all it’ll be.