12. Salem
TWELVE
SALEM
Lowen leads me outside to a black SUV. I kind of took him for the fancy sports car type. The vehicle beeps when Low hits the key fob in his hand and swings around to the driver side. I join him on the other side, buckling my seat belt while he starts the engine.
With his hands on the wheel, he turns to me, smiling. “Where to first?”
“There’s a big supply store just off the freeway at the Twentieth Street exit. I figured that would be the best place to start since they have the widest selection.”
“Sounds good.”
He backs out of the parking lot and jerks to a hard stop before chuckling softly and driving forward again.
“Sorry,” he says. “I’m still getting used to this vehicle after nearly two decades of not driving at all.”
“You didn’t drive in Paris?”
He shakes his head, pausing before pulling into traffic. “No need. Paris is very walkable and has good mass transit, and I could always order a car when needed. Good thing is that driving is like riding a bike. It comes back quickly.”
“That makes sense.”
We fall silent, and I wonder if it was him who walked into the office this morning.
“Lowen?”
“Yes?”
“Did you walk in on me and Indy this morning?”
“I sure did, but don’t worry. I didn’t see anything other than legs, and I didn’t tell the others.”
“Thanks.” Embarrassment spreads through me, heating me up. “I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything. You’re both adults and can do whatever you want.”
“It wasn’t planned.”
“Obviously.” He sounds amused, only adding to my embarrassment.
“Is this the part where you give me the best friend speech about not breaking his heart?”
Lowen scoffs, glancing at me briefly. “You couldn’t break Indy’s heart with a sledgehammer.”
“I’m not sure whether I should be offended.”
He pats my thigh. “No offense meant. You can’t break his heart because it’s not involved. It never has been. He’s the only person I’ve ever met who’s completely immune to the lure of love and romance.”
I remember what he told me about past relationships. “We have that in common. I’ve had relationships, but I’m turning over a new leaf.”
“Girl, same.”
An awkward silence falls between us until I find something to say. “You guys met in college?”
Lowen nods, merging onto the highway. I flinch, subtly gripping the door as he cuts it pretty close, pulling in front of an oncoming car. The other driver leans on his horn before changing lanes.
Lowen, seemingly unbothered, waves his hand in the air dismissively. “We did. Sophomore year in English Lit. I was just a baby then. We all were, I guess, but Indy always had a mature vibe about him, even then. He became the natural leader of the group.”
“I can see that.”
“None of us wanted to be in that class, but we all had to take it to fill degree requirements, and luckily, we ended up in the same one. We were assigned to work on a project for Moby Dick and that’s how we became friends. Otherwise, I don’t think it would’ve happened. We moved in different social circles.”
“So it was meant to be?”
He smiles. “That’s a good way to look at it.”
“Has Indy changed much since college?”
“Almost not at all. I find comfort in that, honestly. He’s reliable and steady. He’s always had a good head on his shoulders, and he’d move mountains for his friends and people he cares about. When I told him about my marriage imploding, he immediately booked a flight to Paris to be there for me. Friends like that are rare.”
“Mythical, actually.”
“True. I’m aware of how lucky I am to have these guys in my life. It’s a shame all our hopes and dreams fizzled out, but maybe life was just preparing us for a new, better dream.”
“Huh. I wonder if I can find your optimism for my situation.”
“What happened?”
“Just a lay off, but I had no choice but to stay with my parents again. It feels like a big step back. ”
“Ah. I would hardly classify myself as the eternal optimist, but even my jaded ass can see the beauty in Indy’s timing with this bar idea. I needed to get out of Paris and within two weeks of making that decision, Indy called with this crazy idea. Our friends were ready for a change of direction, and you ended up here again too. Kind of hard to deny the universe’s timing.”
His words settle over me, and for just a second, there’s a trickle of hope blooming in my chest. Maybe instead of comparing my current reality to my old one, I can figure out how to embrace this new direction. Making out with Indy certainly is a perk.
“I do have a tiny bit of advice though,” Lowen says.
“Lay it on me.”
“You wouldn’t be the first person in Indy’s orbit to insist they don’t want a relationship who eventually ended up desperate for more. If you truly don’t want that, and I suggest you stick with that approach, then guard your heart. He has a mysterious way of making people fall for him despite his own wishes. Who he is just makes men and women trip over themselves.”
“I appreciate the advice, but after what this little heart of mine has been through, even Chris Hemsworth as Thor couldn’t break past the barricade around it.”
“Not Chris Hemsworth.” He winks at me with a smile as he takes the exit at breakneck speed, slamming on the brakes when we arrive at a red light.
“And none of you ever fell for him?”
“Oh, I’m sure we all had our crushes at one time or another, but the benefit of being his friend is having a front row seat to his love life, and only a masochist would willingly sign up for that.”
“Damn. You make him sound ruthless.”
“Just the opposite. I think that’s why people fall. If he was a dick it would be easy to walk away. He’s a good guy. Just stingy as fuck with his emotions.”
I nod, mentally chewing over Lowen’s words. Lucky for me, I’m dedicated to the prevention of love and other misguided pursuits.
“We’re just having fun,” I explain. “It’s nothing more than that.”
Lowen glances at me, and I swear I see a glimmer of doubt on his pretty face, but it’s gone soon enough. “Sooo… I’ve noticed you have a femme vibe.”
I nod, glancing out the window as Lowen follows the GPS directions to the first location. “Yeah. I embraced it more when I lived in New Onyx. I guess I’ve been worried about how the residents in Willow Bay will take it.”
“Who gives a fuck? You’re a grown-ass adult and you can wear what you want.”
“Old traumas when it comes to this topic.”
“Oh?”
“Just bullies and disapproving looks, but that was a long time ago.”
“The landscape has changed, and honestly, I think the only way people get more comfortable with things is through exposure.”
“Good point. Have you always presented the way you do now?”
He nods, turning right into a parking lot. “In degrees. More subtle, then heavy, then more elegant as I found my footing. My industry helps. It’s not a stretch for an interior designer to be a bit flamboyant or eccentric.”
“Was your husband more masculine? Is it okay to ask about him?”
“Oh, it’s fine. That asshole. Alain Durand. Narcissist extraordinaire. ”
“Your ex is Alain Durand?”
He scrunches his nose with a nod. “Sadly.”
“I used to follow his career more when I had aspirations to live in a fancy house designed by him. I lost interest a few years ago though. Maybe that’s why I didn’t know about you?”
“Likely. I enjoyed a lot of success but within niche circles. I had this grand idea of what success was and then I achieved it. It was incredible and brought me into Alain’s world.”
He pulls into a parking space and shuts the car off, but his expression is sad now, his eyes almost misty.
“We don’t have to talk about him.”
Lowen turns to me, smiling. “Let’s move on. He’s the past, and I’m all future.”
We exit the car and as we walk toward the front, he looks over his shoulder at me. “Oh, and to answer your question, he didn’t present masculine but not as femme as I do. Ironic since I’m such a slut for a burly bear. The man who torched my heart is like a haunted doll. Delicate and fragile but hell-bent on your demise.”
My jaw drops as Lowen walks on. Damn. I thought I was bitter.
“Now.” Lowen flourishes his hands as we step inside the store. “I want a fine selection of martini glasses. That’s my drink of choice. What’s your favorite?”
“I’ll drink just about anything, honestly. I guess I’m showing my age and lack of sophistication.”
“It’s just preference. I was drinking dirty martinis at eighteen at my mom’s dinner parties. Lived in Switzerland too, so I started with wine and moved up.”
“I’ve never had a martini.”
“Ooh, we must inaugurate you then. Of course, Indy will tell you that all you need is a finely aged whiskey, neat. Too strong for my blood.”
“What does Kit drink?”
“Gin. Anything with gin. Ridley is more of a craft brew snob. His eyes light up when he hears IPA.”
I chuckle. “And the twins?”
Lowen pauses, his brow creased. “Is that what you call Bane and Jerryn?”
“Yeah. Nothing bad meant. They’re just always together.”
“That’s hilarious. They like mixed drinks and fancy cocktails with funny names. Now that I think about it, the twins is actually an appropriate nickname for them.”
“It’s cute that you guys have signature drinks and you opened a bar. Very meta.”
“Serendipity.” He bumps his arm into mine with a smile on his face. “Just like you being back in Willow Bay.”
“Yeah.”
As we look at glassware, I let our chat sink in. I’m gonna work on looking at the bright side. I’ll have fun with Indy while it lasts, and keep my heart far out of reach.
Piece of cake.
Nearly four hours later, after visiting five restaurant supply stores, Lowen is happy with his selection. On the way back to Willow Bay, we swung by the bakery and then a restaurant and ordered a shit ton of food for the guys, and my mouth waters from the smell of chicken parm filling the car.
I brace myself to see Indy again as we enter Moby’s, hands full and stomachs growling. Ridley and Kit see us first, rushing over to help, but Oakley seems to zero in on Lowen, taking every bag he’s carrying.
“Thank you,” Lowen says sweetly. His tone is completely different with Oakley. Gone is the snarky edge and dramatic cadence, replaced by something sensual and a little bit sweet. Hmm, he’s probably kryptonite to a bear like Oakley.
Indy steps out from behind the bar, and instead of a smile, I’m greeted by smoldering eyes and his tongue sweeping over his bottom lip. Christ on a cracker, this man.
“Hope you’re hungry.”
Indy nods, his eyes roaming up and down my body. “I sure am.”
“Fuck yeah,” Kit hollers. “They picked up Giovanni’s.”
“Couldn’t go to the city and skip it,” Lowen says, helping set out containers on the tables. “We got a sample of everything.”
“Ooh, perfect timing,” Jack says, removing his hard hat.
Indy moves closer to me, and I swear I just heard him emit a little growl. It shouldn’t be hot that he’s possessive and jealous when he has no right to be, but that doesn’t mean it’s not.
“How was the shopping expedition?” Indy asks.
“Good. I’m glad Lowen came. He taught me a lot, so in the future I can handle it myself.”
“Did he find what he wanted?”
“He did. One store had a great selection.” I lean in a little closer. “Low tells me you’re a whiskey neat kind of guy?”
“Yep.” He nods. “I don’t want anything watering it down.”
“You’ll have to introduce me. I’ve never had it other than in a whiskey and coke.”
He scrunches his nose in disgust. “It can’t be cheap whiskey though. I’d be happy to share my preferences with you.”
“Cool.”
“We should get some food before these animals clear it out.”
I laugh softly. “Good call. The chicken parm has been luring me the whole ride back. ”
“They have the best at Giovanni’s.”
“I agree.”
Before I can walk off, Indy slides his arm around my waist, pressing his chest to my back.
“Come over tonight,” he whispers, subtly nuzzling my hair. “I need more of you.”
Swallowing hard, I nod, unable to speak as my body heats and my cock jerks in my jeans.
He releases me, saying, “Good,” as he passes me to the food tables.
I grip the back of a chair to steady myself, Lowen’s warning replaying in my head. People fall for him against their wishes, and I’m starting to see why. The man is sexy, but there’s something deeper and more addictive to his allure that draws me in.
I just have to keep my defenses up and remember that no matter what he says or how amazing his dick is, this is just sex between… friends? Let’s go with that.
No hearts, just dicks. I can do that. I have to.