Chapter 35
Quinn
“C assie!” I call out.
Footsteps sound out in the hallway, and the bathroom door creaks open. “What’s wrong?”
“Can you please come in?” I yank the shower curtain back. “I need to talk to you. We need to talk.”
“Right now?”
“Yes, right now. Get in here.”
Okay, so maybe I could have picked a more appropriate time to have this discussion with her. I feel like shit, inside and out. But dammit if I can keep the words inside me any longer.
“I screwed up, Cass. I screwed up big time.”
She folds her arms across her chest. She’s not going to let this slide. Nor should she. I acted like a massive tool yesterday, and no way should she let me get away with it .
Who gets a girl pregnant, a girl he’s wildly attracted to and has all these crazy feelings for, and then kicks her out of his apartment when she tells him she’s having his baby?
Yep. I’m a fucking catch.
I don’t even know where I should start. The list of things I need to apologize to this woman for is exponential. I decide to tackle the most pressing issue first.
“I left you alone when you needed me.”
Cassie nods. Her bottom lip disappears between her teeth.
“I’m so sorry. I just…” Pushing my hands back through my hair, water drips from the ends, running down my back. “Look, whatever you need from me, I’ll be here for you.”
“You will?”
“Before I got blind drunk last night, Reed and I talked. He told me a few things that made me see sense.”
Cassie winces.
“I know, I know, I should have talked to you instead.” I press my hands against the shower wall to steady myself. “But you have to know I’m all in, Cassie. Whatever you want, whatever you need, I’ve got you. And I’m not just talking about financially, which is never going to be an issue. I’ve got enough money to buy whatever we need. And I’m guessing babies need a lot, but I don’t want you to stress about money. I’ll cover all your living expenses, bills, school, whatever it takes to make sure you’re looked after.”
Cassie rubs her forehead like her mind is in a whirl. “I don’t want your money, Quinn. I work two jobs, and—”
“You’re not going to be able to keep that up. Be real.”
“I’ve been looking after myself for a long time.”
“Yes, you have. And you do an amazing job, but you don’t need to keep running yourself into the ground anymore. That’s what I’m trying to tell you. I’m going to take care of everything. I want to take care of you and the…baby.”
My voice hitches over the word. How can four little letters, two tiny syllables hold so much weight? But they definitely do. We’re having a baby. Cassie and I are having a baby. It’s crazy how, in just twenty-four hours, your world can change so drastically.
“I want to be there for you emotionally, too. You need to tell me everything that’s been happening to you. Can you do that for me?”
A little line appears above the bridge of her nose. “Trust me, you don’t want to know.”
“Let’s agree to disagree, and you tell me anyway.”
“You really want to hear about how disgusting breakfast burritos look in the bottom of the toilet bowl? Or how the zipper on my jeans only just goes up?”
“Have you seen a doctor yet?”
“I called the free clinic at NYU yesterday and made an appointment to get checked out properly. The woman on the phone said I’ll get an exact due date once I have an ultrasound.”
I’m already shaking my head before she’s even finished talking. “You’re not getting looked at by some resident medical student at a free clinic. No way.”
“Don’t be such a snob.”
“I’m not being a fucking snob. There’s more to it than that. I want to go with you, but I can’t get dragged into a campus clinic. Every kid looking to score free condoms will know who I am. And then word will get leaked to the press, and the entire world will know about you being pregnant before we’ve even had time to tell our families. Is that what you want?”
“No, I guess not.”
“I know that makes me sound like a pretentious asshole, but that’s just the way things are. Everyone has a price.”
Cassie’s shoulders visibly tense. “So what do you suggest?”
“There’s a fancy new medical center that just opened up in Newark. I saw it online the other day, it’s supposed to have state of the art equipment and the best medical staff. We’ll go there. I’ll make some calls later.”
“Okay.”
“I want to go with you. Is that alright?”
“Of course.”
“We’re performing live on a morning show tomorrow. After that, I’m free for a few days. And the rest we’ll work out together. As things come up, we’ll figure it out, both of us. I want to be involved in this. I really do, please let me be involved. Okay?”
“Sure.”
“Good.” I nod, taking a deep breath. “I’m glad we got that sorted out.” Water streams down my neck, strands of hair clinging to my wet skin, and I use both hands to push my hair back out of my face. “Now, if it’s not too much of an inconvenience, I’d like you to get your sexy ass in this shower with me.”
“What?”
“You heard me.”
“R-right now?” she stutters.
“Do you have somewhere else to be?”
She licks her lips and steps closer. “No, I guess not. ”
“Am I inconveniencing you?”
“No, but…I don’t think that’s such a good idea. We have a bad track record showering together. Things lead to other things.”
I grin at her. “You can’t get pregnant twice.”
“That is a valid point.”
“I want you to tell me more about all the shit you’ve been going through. All the stuff I was too blind to notice and too fucking stupid to ask about yesterday.”
Cassie quickly strips out of her clothes and underwear, stepping into the shower with me. “Well, if you really want to know…I’ve been really tired lately.”
I nod slowly, guilt rising quickly inside me. Cassie’s always tired because she works so damn hard and never cuts herself a break. I should have picked up on the fact that her exhaustion was something more than just working herself into the ground.
I glide my hands to her shoulders and start kneading the wet skin. “Okay, what else?”
“And I’ve been peeing a lot more.”
I press my thumbs deep into the muscles on either side of her neck, massaging her just hard enough to make her moan. “I see.”
“And my boobs are really sore.”
“That’s shit.”
“I’ve been really emotional lately too. Like crazy emotional, I cry at the drop of a hat. And I mean that literally. Have you seen that infomercial for those senior living apartments?”
“Can’t say I have.”
“The old guy drops his hat, Quinn. He’s just strolling along the sidewalk, and he’s wearing a hat. He takes it off to look up at the sun, and then he drops it. A little boy walking in the opposite direction picks it up for him, and it’s just so beautiful that I cry every time.”
I press my lips together to cover my smile. Now is not the time to be caught making light of the situation. I keep massaging her neck because it seems to make her happy.
“Anything else?”
“My back is sore.” She pouts. “But that’s because I tried to move the washing machine yesterday by myself, and I think I pulled a muscle.”
I don’t know where it comes from, but my natural instinct to protect Cassie, and to protect this baby, suddenly rears up from out of nowhere. “Why were you moving something so heavy by yourself? You want to move the fucking washing machine again, Alabama, you call me. That’s what I’m here for. Got it?”
Her smile is the epitome of sweetness. “Alright, I got it.”
I bring my hands up to slide into Cassie’s hair, brushing my thumbs across her cheeks. “I’m really am sorry.”
“You’re forgiven.”
I bring my lips over hers, and my tongue dips inside her mouth. She moans softly. The sound causes me to pull her closer and closer, and then we spend the entire next hour in the shower together, not getting pregnant again.