Chapter 36
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
D arcy was waiting for her when she arrived at Netherfield. After helping her step out of the carriage, he led her towards the entrance.
“My sister is in her apartment,” he said. “Fitzwilliam and I confided in Bingley last night. He has been such an enormous help to me since this disaster began that I do not like to keep anything from him. Besides, he noticed my cousin and I were acting oddly. Once he understood the import of your discussion with Georgiana, he volunteered to take Wickham away for the day to ensure he did not disrupt you.”
“If I did not already love him for making Jane so happy, I would now. Where will I find you and the colonel?”
“The drawing room. Send for us, should you require assistance. As much as we believe it would be easier for a lady to talk to her, Fitzwilliam and I are prepared to demand frank responses, should it be necessary.”
She gave him a reassuring smile and made her way to the stairs .
In Georgiana’s apartment, she apologised for departing as she had the day before.
“I hope nothing was amiss?”
“It was a trifling matter. Something I forgot to do for my father.” Elizabeth sat in the same chair she had previously occupied, once again having to remove several items first. “Now, where were we? I believe I was mentioning how much I look forward to being settled at Pemberley. Your brother says the estate is beautiful no matter the season, and I am anxious to begin learning all the hidden corners in the house and discovering favourite walks about the grounds.”
She encouraged Georgiana to tell her what she most loved about her home and what it was like when she was a child.
“I have found that my experiences of living at Longbourn now that I am grown are very different from those when I was a child,” Elizabeth said. “Perhaps I mean how I view it—even the size of the rooms seems to have changed.”
“Truly?” Georgiana sounded delighted. “I wonder whether Pemberley will seem changed to me, now that I am returning as a married woman. The last time I was there, I had just left school. I always thought it was the best place in the world, and the most beautiful, and that I was so fortunate to grow up there.”
“It certainly seems you were.”
“I do not know where Wickham and I shall live. He says that he cannot decide yet. He has to finish his studies, but he believes every town needs solicitors. Meryton is not especially large, and your uncle finds sufficient work to support himself and your aunt. Wickham and I might live close to Pemberley. Then our children might grow up together, just as my brother and husband did.”
Elizabeth’s heart rate increased. She had wanted to bring the topic to babies, and it had been even easier than she had expected. “I hope you will always reside nearby. Have you and Mr Wickham spoken of having children?”
Georgiana nodded enthusiastically. “I would like to have a baby, but Wickham says there is no hurry. We are young, me especially.” She blushed. “I know he is right, but I do love children, and he must want a son. Do not all men desire a son? But he says he prefers it to be just the two of us at present, that we should enjoy this time together. I must take time to become accustomed to being a married lady.”
If he were so concerned with it, he would not have insisted you marry so hastily. Instead, he would have permitted you some months—or years, given your age—to contemplate how your life would change once you were a wife! “That is kind of him.”
“Oh, he is very, very good to me. I do not believe my brother and cousin understand how truly good my husband is. He is correct, of course, that there is no rush to have children. He promised me that we would, as soon as he was sure I was properly prepared. I asked him when he thought that might be, and he said I would know, because he would pay me more attention.”
She spoke as though Elizabeth must naturally understand what this meant. Dreading having to enquire—she would not like to hear about what any couple did in private, let alone this couple—she steeled her resolve and said, “Oh?”
Averting her eyes shyly, Georgiana leant towards her and whispered. “More special attention. He is so kind to me, so considerate.”
So you have said, Elizabeth silently interjected, her eyes aching as she forced them to remain on her companion and not roll dramatically in a show of how tired she was at hearing it .
“He always worries about making too many demands of me,” Georgiana went on. “But he hardly asks anything of me. I am always the one who wants him to embrace me or-or even kiss me.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “I worry he will hate me for being wanton, especially when he only wants to ensure I do not end up with child.”
Embrace and kiss? Is that all? But why would he refrain? And does it mean there is a way to free her from this farce of a union? Elizabeth was not conversant with the laws regarding annulment or divorce, but she knew both were extremely difficult to obtain, especially for women and without destroying reputations. Likely even Lord Romsley’s influence would make little difference. But that was a discussion for Georgiana’s guardians and the earl to have.
Calmly and carefully, mindful of not betraying how deeply Mr Wickham had been deceiving Georgiana, preying on her guilelessness, Elizabeth said, “You were so young when you and he were married, and it was so unexpected, you may not have had the benefit of speaking to another woman about what it meant to be husband and wife beforehand. My mother has talked to me of it, for instance, and I know she will continue to do so even after Darcy and I are married, to share her experiences and advice. Did your companion, Mrs Younge, ever raise the subject?”
Georgiana sat back in her chair, her head tilted to one side. “She said that Wickham loved me.”
Elizabeth smiled and nodded. “But did she say anything about what would happen once you and Mr Wickham were married?”
“She said I must trust him and let him do whatever he wanted, that all good wives must do so, and if I wanted him to be happy, which of course I do, I should never ask him what he does when he is not with me.”
“I see.” Elizabeth gently cleared her throat. “I shall be your sister soon. I already think of you as one of my sisters, so I hope you will confide in me. Are you comfortable with Mr Wickham’s…attentions? You mention him kissing you, but is there anything else he does that you wonder about?”
Georgiana’s eyes were clouded with confusion, which made Elizabeth feel wretched. She knew the conversation was uncomfortable—it was for her, and she was far bolder than Georgiana ever would be—but she had to persist.
“I-I quite like it when he kisses me. I would not mind it if he did more often, but he really is the most excellent husband, and because it is too soon for me to have a baby, he does his best not to kiss me. He says it is the only way to ensure I do not.”
Elizabeth pretended to cough while she regained her composure. “Excuse me for asking so many questions, Georgiana, but it is important. Just to be sure I understand, Mr Wickham does not even like to kiss you very much so that you can avoid having a child?”
Georgiana nodded; she looked as though she was receiving a scolding.
“My dear, what do you understand of how babies are created?”
“W-well, when two people are married and affectionate together, when they hold hands, and embrace, and-and kiss and want to have a child— Elizabeth, have I done something wrong?”
Tears began to spill down Georgiana’s cheeks, and Elizabeth hastened to hold and comfort her. She made soothing sounds until she felt the young woman’s distress ease .
It astonished Elizabeth how little her sister-in-law understood of how her own body worked. As soon as Elizabeth and her sisters began to have their courses, Mrs Bennet had explained what it signified. When she and Darcy had become engaged, her mother had spoken to her at length of not getting caught up in her feelings, emphasising in a practical fashion that a little kissing was acceptable, but absolutely nothing else, going so far as to state where and how it was permitted to touch each other. For all her faults and inability to provide her daughters with the education they should have had, her mother was excellent at ensuring they understood this aspect of being a woman.
“Everything is well,” Elizabeth murmured. “I promise you, everything will be well.”
After helping Georgiana dry her tears, they chatted about shopping and the Festive Season for a while. Elizabeth then excused herself, promising to return shortly.
I must find Darcy and the colonel at once! She prayed Mr Wickham did not return before she had a chance to tell them all she had learnt.