17
NICO
Me: Happy three week anniversary, mi Reina.
Mi Reina: It’s not our anniversary.
Me: Don’t be shy about it, muffin. So, I was thinking.
Mi Reina: That never leads to anything good.
Me: You’re so funny. Anyhow. I think we should start planning our Halloween costumes. It’s only a month away and I want to make sure ours is the best.
Mi Reina: The best for what?
Me: The team Halloween party, silly. It won’t be on actual Halloween because we’ll be traveling, but we’ll have fun just the same.
Mi Reina: I don’t need a costume because I’m not going to any party. Quit acting like we’re a real couple.
Me: Babe. You can fight this all you want but it’s happening. Just accept it. Back to our costumes. I thought it’d be great if you dress up like a bun and I’ll be the hot dog, then you can let me stick my wiener in your buns.
Mi Reina: Pass. How about I go as a serial killer and you can be my victim. I can’t guarantee that the knife will be fake.
Me: You cheeky minx. If you don’t like the hot dog idea, how about a plug and an outlet?
Mi Reina: I’m sensing a theme. I don’t do Halloween so you go ahead and dress up to your heart’s delight and celebrate with your friends. I’ll be drinking a gimlet and gorging on candy corn.
Me: Candy corn is my favorite! I knew we were meant to be.
Mi Reina: I’m never eating candy corn again in my life. Shouldn’t you be working out or something?
Me: Done! I can spend the rest of the day talking with you, babe.
Mi Reina: *The number you have dialed is no longer in service.*
Me: Funny woman. I’ll be by your office at 5 with dinner since you don’t leave before 6. What are you in the mood for tonight? BBQ. Tex Mex. Sushi.
Mi Reina: I’m in the mood for eating alone.
Me: Sushi it is. See you later. I hope you’re wearing something sexy.
Mi Reina: I’m wearing my Adam Sandler costume.
Me: I love Adam Sandler!
“ Y ou got this. Be yourself –the charming one– and soon she’ll be climbing you like a cat up a tree.” I give myself a pep talk, staring at my reflection in the mirror because for the first time in my life, I’m nervous about impressing a girl.
But Valentina isn’t just some girl . I’m pretty sure she is THE girl.
If the guys could hear my thoughts right now they’d pull up a chair, grab a tub of popcorn, and laugh at my current conundrum.
Me, Nico “The Love Man” Loving, falling for a woman for the first time in my life.
A woman that can’t stand the idea of me, much less.
I don’t really worry about it that much as one day, mi Reina will worship the field I sprint across.
With a deep breath and a slap of my palms on the counter, I take a last look in the mirror and give myself a wink. I look good. Casual fit, not trying too hard, but still looking like a boss off the cover of a magazine. I want to make her eyes eat me up and her body to beg.
I flip my keys in the air, snatching them in my hand and whistling. Before I can cross the threshold of my front door, my phone begins ringing and buzzing from my back pocket. It’s a familiar ring and I already know that I can’t just ignore it. Not anymore.
I sigh and set down my chips then plop down on the couch. The setting sun is glowing through my windows, making the walls look like they’re bathed in flames. I swipe to answer my phone, bring it to my ear and wait for the name calling to ensue.
“Dude. It’s about fucking time you answered. I’ve been calling you for days, Papas.” I smile and wait to see how this trips him up.
“Wha–huh? I don’t–I didn’t…You, douche hole. I called you.” Saint stutters and I burst out laughing as does Diva who’s the third on our call.
“Too much information. Brain does not compute.” I mimic my voice to that of a robot and Soba laughs even harder.
“Fuck off,” Papas pouts. “I’m hanging up.”
“No,” Soba chokes through laughter. “Don’t leave us. Who will we make fun of? By the way, how did your interview with Hallmark go?”
The tears begin to fall as the laughing continues. It feels good to laugh like this. Since being split up in different states, my brothers and I haven’t had many of these moments. I love my new city, but being here without Diva and Saint feels wrong some days. I’m sure they could say the same.
I swipe at the tears and sniff away the snot that is beginning to run from my nose. “Okay. We’ll stop. Sorry, man. I know it’s been a long time.
“You’re a dingleberry for leaving us on read for so long.”
“Yeah lover boy. Is there a particular reason why you’ve been avoiding us, or do you have your nose shoved so far up your ass you can’t smell anything but your own shit?
” I can picture Soba, resting back on his bed, one leg over the other and staring at himself in the mirror that hangs on the opposite wall, admiring his beauty.
We don’t call him Diva for nothing.
With a crooked smirk I quip, “My shit smells like fucking roses. And let’s not talk about avoiding conversations and dodging questions. You two are equally as sus, so lay off.”
“Yeah yeah. Can we all agree that we’ve been busy and move on?” Diva and I agree and Saint continues. “Okay. So now for today’s agenda. First order of business, the spicy Latina. You can’t just drop a fucking bomb that you’re dating that smoke show and then ghost us.”
“Valentina, jack off. Call her by her name.”
“Ooo. Touchy. Okay. Tell us young Nico,” he teases. “How did it go from she’s my PR to we’re dating ?” Saint lowers his voice to match mine.
“Talk about sus because the Nico Loving I know never dates. He fucks. Full stop.” Diva doesn’t beat around the bush, but he isn’t lying.
I take a deep breath and blow it out, my cheeks puffing up like a blow fish. “We’re…fake dating,” I rush.
“Hold on. What the fuck did you say? I thought you said you two are fake dating ? Diva. You hear that?”
“Same goddamn thing as you, oh holy one. Seems our lover boy can’t even get a real girl.”
“Hey! She’s real, and soon our relationship will be too. I, uh…okay. Here’s the story.”
I lean forward and rest my elbows on my knees and close my eyes. This is going to be a doozy of a story.
“So remember when I got called in the owner’s office after the uh–”
“Whipped cream bikinis,” they say in stereo.
“Yeah. That. Well Waggers and Mr. Montgomery thought an image revamp was in order, and wanted to start with me being in a ‘stable’ relationship. That’s where Valentina comes in.”
I continue to give them all the details from the flubbed up blind date where I slept with Carrigan after being specifically told not to, to my latest of wooing Valentina into falling for me.
I finish but the line stays quiet, neither of them speaking. The air crackles and my stomach gurgles with nerves waiting for them to say something. What I get is not at all what I was expecting. It was foolish of me to think they’d be understanding of my situation.
Loud laughter amplifies through the speaker and they both sound as if they’re gasping for air.
“Are you–” Diva’s heavy breathing muffles his words. “Are you for real right now?”
“They punished you by having you pretend to date a hot ass chick?”
My face scrunches and confusion mars my face. “Y-yes?”
“Now who’s the idiot? Don’t they realize you’ll just fuck that up when you…well, when you fuck the girl? Jesus, this is gold.” Diva is still sucking in air like a man without lungs and Saint tries to make sense of it all.
“No. Well, I mean kind of. I’m not going to fuck it up, but I do have plans to make her my real girlfriend so eventually we’ll sleep together.”
Silence greets once again.
“ Sleep together? When has lover boy ever slept with a woman? You go to pound town until they pass out and when they wake, you shoo them out the door like there’s a fire.”
“I don’t–” I start but make a quick correction. “Okay. I do that. But Valentina is different. She’s not a chick looking to gain status from fucking an athlete. Honestly, she can barely stand to put up with me most days. I guess that’s what makes her so appealing.”
“It’s the chase,” Diva adds and it clicks.
I’ve never chased a woman. They’ve always been the ones to come running after me.
Then again, there’s never been a woman that I’ve wanted to chase.
None of them ever held my attention the way Val does.
She doesn’t just hold my attention, she utterly destroys it.
I can see no one but her. The other faces are nothing but a blur.
It’s like those movies where women stand in a crowd, all fighting for a man’s attention, but the spotlight shines on only one.
The one.
We continue to talk about Valentina, and both Diva and Saint avoid all of my questions about them and their current love lives. When I next look at my watch, it’s four-thirty and I spring from the couch.
“Shit. I gotta go. I’m going to be late?”
“Late for what?”
“For dinner with Val. I told her I’d be there at five and I still have to stop by and pick up sushi. I’ll text you later.”
“Wait–” I end the call, not concerned with the fact that I just hung up on them, and rush out the door.
I’ve got some wooing to do.
Valentina pops the lid back onto the empty container, and dabs at the corners of her mouth like the classy woman she is.
“Thank you for dinner. I have to admit, I wasn’t looking forward to seeing you this evening, but it ended up being a pleasant time rather than the usual annoyance you bring.”
I wipe away the crumbs from my shaggy crunch roll and drop them into my now empty container. “Uh, you’re welcome?”
The saucy smirk and soft look in her eyes is becoming something that she shows with a bit more ease than before.
The past few days, our conversations have grown more and more natural.
Her smartass remarks still fire from her mouth like bullets from a gun, but they’ve turned soft and more like nerf darts.
They only sting for a minute but the laughter and memories are ever lasting.
She goes about wiping furiously at her desk, removing any trace that a human ever made contact with it, and quickly stashing the trash away in a plastic bag and setting it by the door. I watch her and chuckle at her inability to be still.
“What?” She asks as she hangs her purse from the crook of her elbow and holds her briefcase in the other.
“You can’t handle anything out of order, can you? Were your hands itching to organize everything the entire time we were eating?”
The incredulous look on her face judges me while her feet move quickly to exit her office. I scurry behind her so as not to be locked in because I think she’d do it and not think twice about it or care.
She stomps to the elevators and stabs the button, then stares up at the lights that hang overhead.
“I like order in all aspects of my life. And you have brought nothing but dis order and chaos to my perfectly structured world.”
I can’t help my excitement to see her get all in a tizzy. I ruffle her feathers and damn does it turn me on like I never thought it would. That fire in her eyes makes me wonder, does she want to slap my face or kiss me passionately? Honestly, either would be fine with me.
The elevator dings and the doors open, blessedly empty.
We step in and press the button to take us the three flights down to the lobby.
I advance on her and she stumbles back. When I lean into her and rest my hand on the wall, she tries to melt into the cold surface behind her, eyes watching me with bewilderment.
“It’s not chaos that I bring to your life, it’s called excitement. I bring thrill and you love it. You may not know it yet, but you do.”
She glares at me and exhales. “A mosquito at a vampire convention is less annoying than you.” Her eyebrow arches thinking she really stung me with that one, but again…
Freaking turn on.
I inch closer and closer to her, our noses so close I can feel her warm breath blanket over me.
Licking my lips I move in the last centimeter that separates us and press my lips to hers.
Her body sags as a small moan escapes. I move my hand to caress her cheek, sliding my fingers through her hair.
Her back arches and her breasts press against me.
Her purse drops to the floor and her hand roams up my arm.
I’m seconds away from hitching up her leg and sliding between her warm thighs when the sound of the elevator reaching our floor sounds and bursts our bubble.
She pushes me off her, squats down and snatches her purse off the floor. Her legs take her so rapidly out of the elevator you’d think the building was about to come crumbling down. I jog after her, my eyes never leaving her tight ass as it sways from side to side in that tight red skirt.
“Val. Slow down.” I wrap my hand around her arm and tug her to me when I finally catch up with her.
“Don’t touch me,” she bites and yanks herself free. “How dare you do that.” Her eyes spit fire, trying to melt me where I stand.
“Do what? Make you weak in the knees and admit that you want me?”
A loud smack echoes through the lobby and my cheek stings as her hand connects with it. I turn back to look at her and see wide eyes, a pale face and her hand covering her mouth in shock.
“I-I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have slapped you. But you should never have kissed me like that. Dammit.” She stamps her foot and begins spinning in circles, her head looking for a way out.
Tears fill her eyes but she bats them away with her long lashes, never letting one fall. She rushes out the doors to the parking garage and I pursue right behind, determined to make her face her true feelings.
“What is so bad about it? It’s obvious you wanted the kiss, too. Why are you so against it? Against me.” She stabs and stabs at the button to the garage elevator like it will make it descend faster.
“You are no good for me. You’re a playboy, a cocky athlete, and you’re only after two things in life. Fame and women. I won’t be part of your rotating roster. I don’t need a distraction like you in my life.” The doors open and she jumps in but I slam my hand on them before they can close.
“Wrong. I’m only after one thing… you . And the sooner you admit you want me too, the sooner we can both get what we want.” I pull my hand away and watch her face morph as the doors close slowly, taking her away and leaving her to think about the words she knows are true.