MACKENZIE
Mackenzie
The scent of cinnamon and vanilla wafted up from my plate. French toast. My stomach growled, but my fingers trembled as I gripped the fork.
“Are you really going to eat that?”
Daryl’s voice echoed in my head, that soft disapproving tone he used when he wanted to guide me to better choices. His better choices.
Plain yogurt with berries. Egg white omelets. Steel-cut oats that tasted like cardboard. That’s what Daryl would want. French toast drowned in syrup and topped with a mountain of whipped cream? He’d be so mad he’d use his bark on accident.
I cut a corner and piled on so much whipped cream that the fork could barely hold it. The first bite melted on my tongue, sweet and rich and decadent. My eyes watered. Not from the taste, but from the panic clawing up my throat.
I was alone.
I didn’t have an alpha. I didn’t have a pack.
The buffet stretched across the dining room like an endless maze. Omelets made to order. Waffles and French toast with every topping imaginable. Fresh fruit. Pastries. Bacon. Sausage. How was I supposed to navigate all these options by myself? How did anyone make choices when there were so many possibilities?
Daryl had been my compass. He kept me away from bad decisions, kept me on track. Now I was adrift without him.
I forced myself to swallow another bite. It was delicious. But each mouthful felt like failure, like proof I couldn’t be trusted to make good choices on my own. The whipped cream turned sour on my tongue.
I stabbed another piece. This was ridiculous. I was a grown woman. I could eat whatever I wanted for breakfast.
“I told the steward we’re good with sharing the room.” Theo set a water bottle in front of me, his coconut scent instantly making me feel better. “We should probably head to orientation soon. But hydrate first. We’re both probably really dehydrated after…” His voice trailed off when he caught sight of my face. “Mackenzie?”
I quickly wiped away the tear tracking down my cheek and pulled out my well-practiced “Everything’s fine” smile.
Theo pulled out the chair across from me, the scraping sound making me flinch. But then his foot came to rest against mine under the table, and something inside me unclenched. His presence was so damn soothing.
“Hey.” His eyes sparkled with genuine concern, but not the kind I was used to. My alpha’s concern had always been about appearances, about what other people would think of his omega crying in public. My ex-alpha. I had to remember that part.
“I, uh…” I dabbed at my mouth with the napkin, buying time, trying to find the right words. “My alpha dumped me.” The words tumbled out before I could stop them. “He never let me eat French toast and now I’m eating French toast and…” I stopped, hearing how ridiculous it sounded. “Sorry. This sounds so stupid.”
“You’re used to orbiting around someone else, and now you feel like you’re spinning out of control.”
His words hit me like a punch to the chest. Yes. Exactly. That’s what this felt like, like I was an untethered satellite drifting further and further into space.
“It’s not stupid, Mackenzie.” Theo’s voice was soft but firm.
An alpha walked past our table, his woodsy scent making my nose twitch. I ducked my head and focused on my plate, holding my breath. I wasn’t ready for the onslaught of alpha pheromones yet.
But Theo’s scent filled the space. His foot stayed pressed against mine, grounding me.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” I whispered, twirling my fork through a puddle of syrup.
Theo nodded. He didn’t try to fix it or shove me in a direction like everyone else had been doing since the breakup. Well, the handful of people who still talked to me, that is.
“I don’t even know who I’m supposed to be.” The words spilled out before I could catch them, raw and honest in a way I hadn’t allowed myself to be in months.
“Do you know anyone on the cruise?” Theo reached across my plate to snag a spoon, then dipped it into my mountain of whipped cream. He was a real omega. He didn’t fall apart over breakfast.
“Just you.”
“I don’t count.” His voice was light but there was something underneath it, an old hurt maybe.
“Of course you count.” I caught his eyes, making sure he knew I meant it.
“My point is,” he went for another spoonful of whipped cream, “you don’t know anyone here. Nobody knows you. So you can be anyone you want.”
I pushed my plate toward him, offering the rest of my French toast. He cut off a huge corner, awkwardly wrangling it on his spoon. Something about watching him eat my food, completely unselfconscious about it, made my chest feel lighter.
“Aren’t we late for something?” I needed to change the subject before my brain exploded from all these possibilities.
“Yeah, but it doesn’t matter.”
“It matters to you.”
His uneasy shrug told me I was right.
I brushed hair out of my eyes and straightened my spine, channeling some of his quiet confidence. “Well, I definitely don’t want to be the omega who ruins things for their best friend.”
He raised an eyebrow, a smile playing about his lips. The morning sun caught his blond curls, making them glow like a halo. “I highly doubt you could ruin anything, but let’s get going.”
We stood and made our way out of the dining room. Theo had to tug on my arm to turn me in the right direction. I slowed as a realization dawned on me. Theo was a couple steps ahead now, giving me a good view of his entire fit. His hair was perfectly parted, even though the humidity was bringing his curls to life. His clothes were ironed, even his shoes were shined.
He turned back with a frown of concern on his face.
“Theo, you’re on a matchmaking cruise.”
“Yes, I know, we both are.” His smile was confused, but adorable.
“No! Theo! You are on a matchmaking cruise.”
“Mackenzie, are you okay? We can go…”
“I’m here,” I dramatically pointed to myself, “because I’m pathetic and my best friend thinks I need some alpha fling to get over Daryl.” I rolled right over Theo’s words of protest. “I didn’t even know this was a matchmaking cruise. You’re here to find your pack.”
“Well, yes. I’ve been planning this cruise for like a year.”
“You have a spreadsheet, don’t you?”
Theo cringed. “Maybe?”
“Perfect.” I hooked his arm and got us moving again. “Show me everything.”
“You don’t have to… I mean, it’s just… finding a pack isn’t easy for someone like me.”
The way he said it, small and uncertain, made my heart ache. “Someone amazing?”
He rolled his eyes, but I could tell my words hit home. “A male omega. Packs don’t exactly line up for us.”
“Then they’re idiots. Operation: Find Theo’s Perfect Pack starts now.”
“We, uh, might need to find a better name than that.”
“Right, you’re in charge of naming things. I’m in charge of…” I lost my train of thought as I turned left down a hall and Theo pulled me right.
“You’re not in charge of direction, that’s for sure.”
“Right. You get names and directions while I figure out what I’m good at.”
“Deal.”