10. Lucia
10
LUCIA
A fter days of delay, I finally find myself in my kitchen, surrounded by pots and pans, preparing my long-awaited lasagna. A tantalizing aroma of herbs and tomato fills the air as I layer noodles, meat, and cheese. Suddenly, a sharp and unmistakable ding interrupts my cooking, coming from my iPad on the counter. Its distinct notification sound was carefully chosen to stand out from any other noise in the house. It sounds like an alarm, buzzing urgently to alert me whenever someone steps onto my property.
I briskly wipe my hands on my apron and click on the notification. The screen flickers to life, revealing a live feed from the security camera mounted near my front door. Fear grips my chest momentarily before the person looks up and makes eye contact with the camera. A different kind of worry consumes me when Saverio’s face fills the frame.
I let out a frustrated sigh and march out of the kitchen, my feet thudding against the floor. I make my way to the front door, my pace quickening with each step. Just as I reach for the doorknob, Saverio rings the doorbell. My hand freezes in mid-air, and I let out a groan before pulling the door open.
“So you do understand how doors work,” I greet sarcastically.
His cold, steely gaze bores into me, his eyes scanning over my face and then slowly traveling down my body, taking in every inch of me with a calculating intensity. “Did you do it?” He asks gruffly, his voice low and hoarse with emotion.
A surge of panic rises up from the depths of my chest, filling the space behind my rib cage. My heart pounds frantically as I struggle to keep my composure. “Do what?” I manage to choke out, even though I’m fully aware of what he’s talking about.
Saverio barges past me, his broad shoulders brushing against mine as he enters the living room. His eyes dart around the space, taking in the furniture and decor with a critical gaze. “I like what you’ve done with the place,” he comments. “I see you got a new sectional.”
It’s been months since he last stepped foot in my house. The last time he was here, he fucked me on the couch at midnight. I had to replace it after that. It’s expensive having a love-hate relationship with someone who gives you the best damn orgasms you’ve ever had in your entire life. “The previous one had bad memories.” Just like the desk in my classroom does.
“You told your brother about the implant,” he says abruptly, cutting through any attempt at small talk. Saverio’s gaze remains fixed on the couch, his voice void of emotion, but his body language betraying his internal turmoil.
Saverio’s presence puts me on edge, making my skin prickle with discomfort. I walk to the edge of the couch and lean against the plush armrest, trying to steady my breathing as I gauge his intentions. “I told him you wanted me to remove it,” I admit. “I didn’t tell him everything.”
“You never tell him everything.” It’s an accusation and a truth at the same time.
The conversation falls into a lull, giving way to a heavy silence that weighs down upon us. I can sense the question burning on his tongue, the unspoken desire behind his calm facade. But he will ask it in his own time, and until then, I mirror his stoic expression.
After what feels like an eternity, Saverio’s lips part, and his voice echoes through the living room. “You didn’t get the implant removed, did you?”
I don’t bother to lie because there’s no point to it; he’s always had a way of seeing past my lies. Saverio’s wrath is not something I want to provoke, so I cling to the truth like a lifeline. He will still punish me for not bending to his will; it’s just a question of how severe the consequences will be. “I did not.” My voice quivers with both defiance and fear.
His gaze shifts from the couch to meet mine, his head tilting slightly as he searches for something in my expression. His eyes narrow, studying me intently as if trying to decipher the complex layers that make up my being. “Because you don’t want to have my baby or because you don’t believe I’ll follow through on my promise?”
“A little of both, if I’m being honest.” His presence in my home is suffocating, just as it was in my classroom last week. It pervades my sense of safety; it invades my personal space. “I don’t know if I’m ready to be a mom. And I don’t know if we’re ready to be parents.” I can barely look at Saverio without wanting to fight or fuck him. How can we teach our child right from wrong when we can barely agree on anything ourselves?
“And the other thing?”
I shrug. “You care more about how I look than you do about us having a child together. I think you’re afraid to leave a permanent scar on my body that will be visible for all your men to see.”
Saverio’s hand dives into his pocket, fingers fumbling until they grasp what they’re searching for. In a single, swift motion, he pulls out a switchblade, its handle worn and dinged from repeated use. In a fluid movement, he flicks open the blade with a satisfying click, revealing its sharp edge glinting in the light. “School starts tomorrow, doesn’t it?”
In this district, we start our school year on a Wednesday. “Yes.”
He slowly turns his body, shifting his attention away from the couch and fully focusing on me. A warm sensation spreads from my stomach, igniting my senses and intensifying my nerve endings. “I warned you, Lucia. I told you what would happen if you didn’t get the implant removed.”
My heart hammers against my chest, a drumbeat of dread as I anticipate what’s about to happen. Saverio is a man who values his reputation above all else, but more importantly, he values loyalty. And unfortunately, I have once again proven that my loyalty lies elsewhere and not with him. A cold sweat breaks out on my skin, and I can feel the weight of his disapproval looming over me like a dark cloud. My stomach churns as I brace myself for the inevitable consequences of my actions. “I can schedule an appointment this week.” My voice falters, full of fear.
Saverio steps toward me, closing the gap and waving around his switchblade. “Do you know how many times your family has betrayed mine? Every time you get a chance, you choose yourselves over the Family. And I let it go. I let Dante and Adalina live happily ever after. I let Niccolo and Christine ride off into the sunset. I’m tired of being the nice guy who lets… everything… go.”
“That isn’t fair,” I seethe, pushing off the couch with a surge of anger. “When Dante broke his marriage contract with Lucrezia, you arranged for me to marry you. And when Niccolo married Christine, you started amping up your efforts to claim me like some kind of barbarian. My brothers committed sins against you, but you make me pay for them.”
As he leans in closer, the familiar scent of his cologne fills my senses, and I know that all hope of persuading him out of his impending course of action is lost. “ Life isn’t fair, Lucia. If it were, Lucrezia would be your sister-in-law, the Lucatellos would back the Castigliones with their money and armies, and you would have married me years ago.”
“I-I couldn’t,” I remind him as he grabs my arm. “You know why.”
Saverio nods his response. “I know. And you know why I can’t let you subvert my will and go unpunished.”