Chapter 6
Chapter
Six
HARPER
R aindrops hit the windshield as Declan drives us to campus. I’m not sure what is stormier, the weather or atmosphere inside the car. We haven’t spoken much since our argument in my room. I’ve apologized, and I don’t think I need to continue to do so. As far as I’m concerned, he owes me an apology for going off the rails and taking my door down.
Emerson and Cy suggested giving him time to cool down, so that’s what I’ve been doing. I spent most of the weekend studying and reading up in Cy’s room while he worked on a few art pieces. Emerson took me out to dinner Sunday. It served as a way to test the waters going out in public post video scandal.
We went to a popular pub just off campus. People definitely gave us, though mostly me, looks as they passed the table. I’m sure there were some whispered comments, but by and large it was a successful night in terms of making me feel comfortable.
“Do you have your phone?” Declan asks as he pulls into a parking space.
“Yes.”
“If anyone gives you trouble, text us in the group chat. One of us will get to you as quickly as possible.”
“You don’t need to do that. I can handle things myself.”
“Harper.” He sighs heavily and pinches the bridge of his nose. “Please tell us so we can help you. I know I’m not Banks, but you can trust me to at least have your back on campus. People respect me, use that.”
I don’t like the emphasis he put on Banks’s name. Not one bit. “Why’d you say his name like that?”
“What?” His brow furrows as he meets my eyes for the first time since he had me on my knees. “Whose name?”
“Banks.”
His head drops back onto the headrest. “We’re going to be late.” He pushes his door open and steps out.
I have no choice but to follow. We both pull our hoods up in an attempt to stay somewhat dry. The fact that I’m wearing one of Cy’s zip hoodies has the added benefit of hanging down to cover most of my face. Although walking beside a scowling Declan doesn’t do much to keep me incognito.
“Are you ever going to tell me what your problem is?” I ask.
He pauses mid stride to look down at me, an eyebrow raised. “You had all weekend to speak to me and you choose now to do so?”
“I would have thought you’d be over it by now, but you’re just stewing in resentment. So yes, let’s do this now.”
He grabs me by the wrist and pulls me into an alcove between two buildings, until we’re under an overhang and mostly hidden behind a row of hedges. He backs me against the brick, penning me between his arms as he leans down so we’re face to face.
“I’m not stewing in resentment, Harper. I’m hurt, and I’m sad, and I’m confused. I hate that you chose to run to him without even considering coming to me first. He’s known you longer and better, of course, but I’m right fucking here.”
He cups my cheek, his hand warm against my cold flesh. I open my mouth to speak, but I can’t find the words. I didn’t realize he felt this way. My eyes start to burn with tears.
“Don’t cry.” He presses his forehead to mine. “Seeing you cry makes me want to set the world on fire.”
I don’t know what to say, and I don’t want to risk crying, which I will if I speak. Instead, I look up into his beautiful green eyes wishing this layered and complicated man came with an instruction manual. He leans down and brushes his lips against mine.
“I’m right here,” he says again, desperation lacing each word.
He pushes off the wall and disappears back out onto the sidewalk as the rain starts coming down heavier again. He breaks into a jog, and I run as I try to keep up with his long-legged stride. He grabs my bicep as I start to veer off toward the building with my class in it.
“Cy’s picking you up. Don’t leave the building without him.”
“Okay. Have a good day.”
He nods and turns back around. “See you at home.”
My heartbeat keeps thrumming quickly in my chest as I pull open the doors, unaware of what will be waiting for me inside the building. I leave my hood up as I walk down the corridor and into the lecture hall.
Emilia is sitting in our usual seats with her bag saving my spot. I’ve never been more relieved to see a friend as I am right now. She does a double take when she sees me coming down the aisle and puts her bag on the floor.
“Girl,” she drawls. “You better tell me that wasn’t an AI video, and you actually did get fucked by all three of those fine ass men.”
“Shhh.” I look around nervously, but no one heard her. “It was just a fake. Declan thinks he pissed off a few of the guys at the party.” It’s the lie we made to tell everyone, and honestly, it’s very believable.
“Damn. It was hot as fuck.”
“You watched it?” The blood drains from my face.
“Everyone did.” She pats my leg. “It was the most realistic fake I’ve ever seen. I’m honestly impressed.”
“Let’s just not talk about it.”
I don’t lower my hood until the professor walks to the front of the class. Several people give me disgusted looks. A few guys make me exceptionally uncomfortable with their up and down leering gazes. Even hidden away in baggy clothing, I feel their eyes on my body.
Luckily as class begins, they all turn attention to the front. I relax into taking notes and following along with the lecture. About halfway through class, I feel a tap on my shoulder. I glance down, wondering if someone’s pencil rolled under my seat or something, but there’s nothing. I feel the tap again and then see a small, folded piece of paper in between two masculine fingers. I set it to the side, wholly uninterested in whatever it says, and whoever handed it to me doesn’t seem too stressed about getting my attention because no one says anything.
“Give me that,” Emilia says as soon as class ends. She grabs the note before I can, unfolding it quickly and out of my reach. “If this is from some perv, I’m gonna kick some ass.”
Unfortunately, I know as soon as she opens it that it’s not from some random college kid. Her skin takes on a white pallor as her eyes scan what it says. I reach over and take it while she shoots up from her chair and spins to grab the guy behind us.
If you want to act like a whore, I’m going to treat you like one.
“Why the fuck would you write that?”
“What?” he looks back and forth between us, confusion clear on his face.
“The note you passed? What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“I just handed it up from a girl behind me.”
“Get fucked.” Emilia seethes. “I’m taking this to administration.”
“It wasn’t me,” he says frantically. “I swear.”
“I believe you.” I take the note back from Emilia just as Cyrus pokes his head in the room. He lights up as soon as he sees me, but I turn my attention back to the guy. “But you really didn’t see who handed this to the girl first?”
“No, I didn’t. Sorry.” He takes his things and hauls ass out of the room.
“What’s going on?”
“Some freak sent Harper this creepy ass note.”
“It’s the same as others.” I hand him the paper and watch as his face goes from concern to anger.
“Others?” Emilia asks.
“Yeah, I’ll explain later.”
“You don’t know who handed it to you?” Cyrus looks back and forth between Emilia and me.
“The guy who handed it to me said it came from behind him. There’s no way to know who it originated from.”
He looks up and around the room for a minute before looking back at me. “Come on. Let’s get you home.”
I give Emilia a hug as we exit the building and go in opposite directions and promise to call her later and explain everything. Or at least, as much as I can. I’ll probably talk to the guys and maybe Cillian and Mom first.
Cyrus leads me to where he parked his Ducati and hands me my helmet. I take his empty backpack and fold it up inside mine while he gets on and waits for me to climb on the back. As soon as I’m situated, he takes my arms and wraps them tightly around his stomach.
The rain stopped while I was in class, but parts of the road are still wet, so he doesn’t drive as fast as he usually does. He does reach back and rub my thigh at every opportunity though. I know he’s probably just checking in with me to make sure I’m good, but it still gives me butterflies every time. I never thought I’d be the type of girl to love riding on a motorcycle, but it’s almost as much fun as riding Annie.
Speaking of my horse, it’ll be too muddy to take her out for a ride, but I can’t wait to get to the barn anyway. I wish I could go now, but even if I had a vehicle that was totally my own, I don’t think the guys would let me go anywhere without one of them. Even though I’m plenty safe at the stables.
Cy is unusually quiet as we get off his bike and walk into the house. I can tell his mind is somewhere else, probably on the note or maybe even whatever happened the other night with his uncle. As soon as I set my helmet down on the shelf in the mudroom, I feel Cy lift my backpack off my shoulders. I squeak as he spins me around and pins me against the wall.
His lips cover mine in a bruising kiss. He traces my lips with the barbell in his tongue. The sensation sends familiar heat racing right to my clit. I know exactly how good he is with that particular piercing.
“If I didn’t have to turn around and leave right now, I’d bend you over right here and fucking feast on your pussy,” he says against my lips. “You’re ours.” He pulls away and looks into my eyes. “You know that, right? You’re ours as much as we’re yours. And you’re in no way a whore.”
I nod, fighting back the shame that I know will wash over me as soon as I’m alone.
“When we figure out who is sending these letters, I’m going to kill him.”
I blink, surprised at the ferocity of his declaration. It doesn’t sound like hyperbole. It sounds like a promise.
“Emerson is on his way home now. I trust that you’ll be a good girl and not leave the house until he’s here to drive you to work?”
“Yes.”
“Good girl,” he says with a wink. “We’ll talk about everything over dinner.”
“Okay.” I give him another kiss goodbye and watch as he takes back off, driving much more like he usually does now that I’m not riding with him.
I go up to my room to change and roll my eyes when I go to close the door and there’s nothing there. I had been planning on demanding my door back tonight, but now that there’s been another threat, I know it’s not the right time. At this rate, I’ll never get it back.
Emerson gets home right as I finish buttoning up my flannel uniform shirt. It’s nice that the stables have these for us, especially flannel options because, as a southern girl, anything below seventy degrees feels cold to me.
He stops at my door on the way to his room. “Let me drop off the books I don’t need and then I’ll be ready.”
“Okay,” I answer with a smile. “I’ll be downstairs.”
Annie sticks as much of her face as she can into her bucket, trying to get the last few grains out. Her coat had been dull when Declan gave her back to me, but with the feed I’ve been buying, she’s back to being in the best condition possible. Her long, black tail swishes happily as she crunches away at her dinner.
I run my hand along her flank, admiring how gorgeous she is. If I could come out here every day and see her, I would. As it is, getting out here three or four times a week is a challenge.
She turns to watch me from the corner of her eye as I begin to brush out her mane. There are a few pieces of hay and some tangles I want to get rid of before I go. She’s a bit of a princess, though, and loves being groomed, so I never worry about her getting upset.
“Are you liking it here?” I ask her quietly. “Do they treat you well when I’m not around?”
She nods, which I knew she would. Any time I speak directly to her she nods. It’s just her horsey personality; she can be a goofy girl when it’s just us two.
“Did she just answer your question?” Emerson asks from the other side of the stall door.
“She sure did,” I answer, curious if I can make him think she’s actually talking to me. “She’s a good listener, aren’t you girl?” I scratch under her chin as her ears flatten at the sight of him.
“She always looks so pissed when I start talking.”
His observation is correct, her ears flatten around most men. Declan has gotten her to take cookies from him, and she’s let Cy pet her, but she never let Banks come near her back in high school. She seems to feel similarly about Emerson.
“Go grab that green bag on the shelf and take out a few treats. They’re her favorite, and she’s taken them from Declan and Cy.”
“So I can bribe her to like me?”
“Don’t think of it as bribery, more exposure therapy. She’s never liked men.”
“Interesting. Was she abused at some point?”
“No. We bought her as a yearling. Aside from the months after she sold off, I’ve always been her owner and caretaker. She doesn’t like men, but she hated my father. She’d always position herself between him and I when he’d come out to the barn.”
“Did she ever witness him hurt you?”
I drop my hands as I try to think back, but all my memories blur together into a hazy mess. There are lengths of time where I know things were bad, but I can’t remember them. It’s like chunks of time that are just gone. She probably did see him hurt me, or at least yell at me.
“Probably.” I shrug. “I can’t recall any specific time, though.”
“Is it easy to remember?” He reaches into the bag of treats and offers one.
“Some of it.” I take the treat from his fingers and set it in his palm. “She’ll take your fingers off if you give her a treat the wrong way.
“Thanks.”
“No problem.” I want to redirect the conversation away from my dad and the abuse. I know he’s going to bring up therapy again, and while I know I need it, I’m not ready for it yet. “I’ll finish up getting her hay, and we can head home.”