2. Daniel
Chapter two
Daniel
The View Between the Villages
I stand on the steps outside my home, a cigarette dangling from my trembling lips as I exhale a cloud of smoke into the air.
The door swings open, and my dad storms out, snatching the cigarette from me in anger. "You shouldn't be smoking these," he scolds, but then takes a long drag himself. "But fuck it, huh?"
I shake my head, tears welling up in my eyes as we both stare out at the darkening sky. "I just... fuck, dad. How do you ever get over this?"
He lets out a heavy sigh. "You don't. We work on forgiveness and learning to live without your sister here. We can't let her death consume us."
"I just don't know where to go from here. I know we had drifted apart, but she was still my sister. I would have done anything to save her, dad."
"And so would I. But Daisy had demons that we couldn't save her from. She needed to want to get clean, but that desire just wasn't there."
I take the cigarette back from my dad and bring it to my lips, feeling numb all over. "I know, but fuck. Why? Why wouldn't she want to get clean? She put us all in this fucked up situation."
"She did. Daisy tried to hurt your friends. And you have every right to be angry about that."
"I am! But I'm also angry at them for not seeing how much she was struggling, and I'm trying not to be, but it's fucking hard."
He nods understandingly. "It is. She was my child, too. I keep asking myself where I went wrong as a parent, but we can't dwell on that now. Sometimes people make unforgivable choices despite our efforts to guide them."
"I... I just can't shake the image of Cat standing over Daisy out of my head. It's haunting me, even in my sleep." I stand up abruptly, tossing the cigarette onto the ground. "I can't fucking do this, dad. I just want to... hurt someone or something."
He stands and puts a comforting hand on my back. "Me too, kid. That's why I use the gym downstairs. It helps me release some of that anger and pain. But know that we're in this together. You and I are more alike than you realize."
He heads back inside and I sink back down onto the steps, pulling out a photo of Daisy from my pocket. "Why did you do this, Dais? Why didn't you ask for help?"
I shove the photo back into my pocket just as my phone starts ringing. Kaiden's name flashes across the screen and I quickly press ignore. I can't handle talking to him right now, knowing that Cat is probably right there with him.
I can't help but understand why she did what she did. It was either her or my sister, and she chose to protect herself. But the memory of that scene still haunts me. My sister's body was covered in blood, and my friends were injured and hurt. It's a constant reminder of how fucked up everything is.
Suddenly, a car speeds into our driveway and Ryan jumps out, shouting curses at me for not answering his calls.
"What do you want?" I ask, annoyed by his sudden appearance.
He takes a seat next to me with a heavy sigh. "She's with him."
"Ally?" I ask, feeling a knot form in my stomach.
"Yeah. She's with him right now and there's nothing I can do about it. This whole situation is sickening," he says with frustration.
"I know we can't kill the bastard, but I wish we could," I say, clenching my fists.
"And risk getting caught? No way. Her dad will just find someone else to marry her off to." He shakes his head in disgust.
"Do you think the old fuck is...?" I trail off, unable to even say the words.
Ryan's face falls solemnly. "No. He'll wait until they're legally married before taking what he wants from her. It makes me sick."
I light up another cigarette, trying to cope with the overwhelming anger and sadness inside me. "Fuck this world."
Ryan nods in agreement. "Are you going back to school tomorrow?"
"Unfortunately," I mutter bitterly. "I have no choice if I want to stay enrolled."
"We're all here for you, man," Ryan says, patting me on the back.
I half-heartedly smile at him and take another drag of my cigarette. "Thanks. I just need to find some way to shake off this funk. What happened... it's just too much."
"I get it. But smoking those cancer sticks won't help. And if Coach catches you, he'll have your ass.”
We both laugh, breaking the tension for a moment. "Yeah, I know. Alright, I'm heading inside. See you tomorrow."
I make my way inside and go straight to my room, throwing open the doors to the attached porch. I roll up a blunt and sink into the chair.
Fuck it all. The last thing I want to do is go back to school, see my friends, pretend like everything is normal. It's not.
My other sister, Delilah, steps out onto the porch from my room. "Mom will kill you if she catches you out here."
"Good. Maybe then she'll finally pay attention to something besides her pills," I mutter bitterly.
"Why are you such an asshole, Danny? Daisy made her own choices," Delilah says sternly.
I blow out a cloud of smoke in her direction. "Fuck off, Del. Not in the mood."
"You and dad both need to shape up or mom is going to leave," she scolds me before storming off.
I just sit back and laugh bitterly. Fuck her. Fuck mom. Fuck it all.
T he sun has just risen and I sit in my car, dread filling me as I contemplate going into school. My heart races at the thought of facing everybody, enduring their whispers and rumors. But I know if I don't go in, my dad will be furious with me.
Sighing heavily, I turn off the ignition and step out of the car. Heading to my locker, I catch a glimpse of Kaiden walking towards me. Panic sets in and I try to turn back around, but he catches up to me.
"We need to talk, Danny."
I shake my head, avoiding eye contact. "No, we really don't."
Kaiden grabs the lapels of my blazer and forcefully turns me to face him, slamming me against the lockers.
"Come on, man. Talk to me. What the hell is going on with you?"
My gaze drops to the floor as I struggle for words. "It's not that simple. You just... you can't understand."
Frustration evident on his face, Kaiden hits his fist against the locker above my head. "Then make me understand! Help me understand what's going through your messed up mind!"
The rest of the Elite Five approach us, concern etched on their faces as they gather around. Kaiden takes a step back, breathing heavily.
"What happened to our promise? No more secrets? No more bullshit?"
I sink down against the lockers, feeling defeated. "Yeah, until my sister tried to hurt you guys and Cat had to kill her. I told you, Kaiden, you just can't comprehend what's going on in my messed up head right now."
He joins me on the floor as X kneels down beside us. "I get it. I really do. Daisy was like a sister to me, Danny. I... I'm sorry."
I nod, tears pricking at my eyes. "Exactly. There are just too many emotions, and I can't handle them anymore."
Iz pats my back, taking a seat beside me. "Call my mom. She can help Danny. But you need to talk to us. You need to talk to someone."
Shaking my head, I stand up. "I can't. This is all my fault. It was my sister. I let Reece into our house. I feel guilty, angry... there are just too many fucking emotions."
X stands and grasps my shoulders firmly. "Dude, if anyone understands what you're going through, it's me. But here's the thing; it's not your fault. Do you know whose fault it is? Daisy and Reece's. They chose to sell drugs, to use them, to put us all in danger and make those shitty decisions. Not us."
"Thanks," I mutter.
"It's okay," Ryan says with a reassuring nod. "We're here for you and we'll get through this together."
The bell rings and students start filing down the hallway, pushing past us to get to their classes. Kaiden pats me on the back.
"Together, man."
The guys all head towards their respective classes, while I lag behind and make my way to mine. As usual, I take a seat in the back of the room, wanting to blend in with the walls. The teacher walks in, tapping her pointer against the chalkboard to get our attention.
"Good morning, class!" she exclaims. "Please stand, as I am now assigning seating for the rest of the year. Push your desks together with the person next to you."
With a heavy sigh, we all stand and gather in front of our desks as she points to each of us individually and then directs us to our new seats.
"You'll be sitting with... Miss Rebecca Carney," she announces. "Now that everyone has their seats, please take some time to get to know your partner. You will be working together on a community project for the remainder of the year."
I turn to face my new desk mate, Becca, who sits across from me with a bored expression on her face. We remain silent until our teacher clears her throat, prompting us to share five things about ourselves with our partner.
"I'm Danny," I introduce myself reluctantly. "I play lacrosse, I have a twin sister… had, I have no interest in this class, and I don't date, so don’t get attached. Oh, and I love going to the beach."
Becca rolls her eyes and pops a bright pink bubble of gum. "I'm Becca," she states matter-of-factly. "I couldn't care less about you, so don't worry about getting attached. My only goal is to pass this class, so please don't mess it up for me. Also, I happen to be fluent in Russian and I like skateboarding just to piss off my mom. And yeah, I hate the beach."
Despite her nonchalant attitude, Becca radiates a fiery energy that inexplicably turns me on. I can’t help but smile and lean back in my chair, silently longing for a cigarette to replace the craving in my mouth.
"Alright, let's get this show on the road.”