Chapter 8
8
W e make the rest of the trip in silence. As promised, Hook delivers us to the tall building that houses both his family and his crew. These days, Michelle has her own suite on a completely different floor from her parents. Part of me wonders if she’ll be waiting for me too. This reeks of a shitty intervention, but that’s not fair. I’m in a mess of my own making, and as angry as I am with my best friend, if I were in her position, I can’t say I would have done anything differently. I am acting out of character. Reckless. Putting myself in danger. I can’t even argue that I’m not, because Wolf is proving himself to be a threat right down to his bones. He’s killed at least one person. Likely more.
Upstairs my parents wait for me with Aunt Tink. Mom rushes to me the second we walk through the door. She grabs my hands and surveys my body. No, she’s looking at the blood spattered across my front. “Are you hurt?”
I’m changed . Altered into something unrecognizable. But hurt? “No.”
“Who was he?” This from Dad. He’s got that look in his eyes, the one that promises violence to anyone who crosses those he cares about.
“One of mine,” Uncle Hook says. “He’s been with us for nearly a decade; he’s a bastard, but she says it was consensual.”
I give him a sharp look, not liking how he phrased that. “It was consensual.” At least to start with. But explaining that means explaining what I was really doing there, which means explaining Wolf, and I’m not ready to have that conversation.
Mom surveys me with those big dark eyes that are like staring into a mirror. “Tell us what happened.”
Now is the time to come clean. To confess that things got out of control with Wolf. To tell them that I have a stalker who’s dangerous and violent. To explain that I encouraged him despite knowing what a shitty idea it was. I don’t know why the words won’t unstick themselves from my throat. Surely it’s better to tell the truth than to have them staring at me like they’ve never seen me before.
I’m not ready to give him up yet.
I am a fool . I’m the girl in the horror movie running up the stairs even as the audience screams at me to call the cops, to yell for help, to do anything but help orchestrate my own violent death.
I have to say something , though. I take a deep breath. “Luke and I broke up. I guess I’m rebounding pretty hard, and I went looking for trouble. I was in the bathroom to hook up with that guy.” One of my fathers makes a choked sound, but I keep my gaze on my mother. “Someone came in when we were in the middle of it. A guy I don’t know. He killed, uh, the guy I was hooking up with and took off when Uncle Hook started yelling.”
“The guy.” Aunt Tink snorts. “Gods, Ruby, you don’t even know the name of the guy you’re fucking?”
Mom doesn’t look at her. “What we’re not going to do is slut shame my daughter.”
“Who’s slut shaming? I’m just commenting on good survival instincts.” She shrugs, completely unrepentant. “In the future, stick to college boys and businessmen, Ruby. And get their name first.”
“That’s enough.” Da steps between me and Aunt Tink. “Let’s go home.” He cuts me a sharp look when I start to protest. “Now is not the time to cling to your independence.”
“Okay,” I finally say, feeling very small.
He turns to Uncle Hook. “Do you need any assistance in the aftermath?”
“No. I’m going to keep this in-house. She was never there. He’s not normally one to get into bar fights, but it’s as good a story as any. You stay in this line of work long enough and old grudges have a way of catching up with you.”
They exchange a look steeped in meaning and history. “Thanks for getting our girl.”
“Anytime.” Hook glances at me. “Don’t stay mad at Michelle for too long. She was only trying to look out for you.”
Honestly, as angry as I am at Michelle, the truth is that her instincts were spot on. I was in over my head and sinking fast. I still am.
Mom doesn’t release me the entire way back to the estate. My parents do one of their mindmelds, and my fathers peel off, leaving Mom to deal with me. The reprieve won’t last, but they’ve obviously decided that Mom has the best chance of the three to get the truth out of me.
She barely waits for us to walk into my childhood bedroom before she starts in on me. “It’s hard to lose your first love, but that’s no excuse to put yourself in danger, Ruby.”
“I know.”
“Do you?” Her voice sharpens. This isn’t the suffocatingly soft check-in that I expected, and I’m almost relieved that this is going to turn into a fight. I drop onto the bed, feeling like I’m sixteen years old again and in trouble for sneaking a bottle from the wine cellar. Mom narrows her eyes. “You are a Belmonte. Your actions have consequences for more than just you. If that man belonged to anyone but Hook, his death could have been enough to tip us into a conflict with another territory.”
I snort. “There hasn’t been war in decades.”
“Exactly,” she snaps. “Because people have worked hard to make that the truth. They didn’t do it by being selfish and reckless.”
I should feel guilty. I know I should. But she’s standing here and judging me when I know for a fact she did some crazy shit when she was my age. And war was an ongoing threat at that time. “That’s rich coming from you.”
“I see there’s no reasoning with you right now.” Mom shakes her head. “We’ll talk in the morning. And I do mean it when I say we’re going to talk, Ruby. You’re going to explain what the hell is going on with you.” She turns and walks out of the room.
The second I don’t have her strong personality to crash against, I wilt. She’s right. I’m being reckless and selfish. I’m not just a normal person who will only hurt myself with my actions. If I manage to single-handedly drag Carver City into another war...
Well, not single-handedly. Wolf played his part too.
With that in mind, I grab my purse and dig through it to find my phone.
What the fuck was that, Wolf?
He doesn’t make me wait long.
Wolf
You know what, baby.
I hate the way heat lances me at those four little words. I do know what. I’ve been playing with fire, and I’m too much of a damn fool to stop.
You can’t just go around killing people like that.
Wolf
Are you mad I slit his throat... or that you would do it all over again because you like how you came hard and messy all over my fingers?
I flush and almost throw my phone across the room. Damn him. No one else has ever tapped into this part of me. I didn’t even know I had the potential for this messiness inside me. This all might have started with me stepping off the path set out for me, but I had no way of knowing I’d end up lost in the woods with no way out.
Or that I might not want a way out.
Wolf doesn’t wait for a response this time.
Wolf
Or maybe it’s that you can’t wait to do it again.
Ding ding ding, we have a winner. I hate myself more than a little for that truth. But not enough to stop.
But now that I’m standing here, my blood buzzing with shame and anger, I can’t help wondering if my little stunt the other night put two more people in danger. I hold my breath as I text Zayne.
What are you doing?
He responds immediately.
Zayne
Is this a ‘you up’ text? Maybe Michelle is right and I SHOULD be worried about you.
I glare at my phone even as relief makes me light-headed. That’s Zayne, all right.
Just making sure you’re still alive and having expired from wanting Tatiana.
Zayne
You’re so mean. I adore it. Welcome back, Ruby. Come out with us next weekend?
Sure. Text me the details later.
I want to be done, but if Wolf might hesitate to harm one of the other children of territory leaders, he seemed really determined for me not to fuck Tatiana in particular. I dig out the card she gave me.
I think I’ll hang onto that picture, but I just wanted to say thanks for the other night.
Is there a good way to ask her if she’s been menaced by a guy in a skull mask? I bite my bottom lip. She isn’t a friend or family member. I don’t want her to think I’m trying to manipulate her into seeing me again, but surely she’d appreciate a proper warning?
Also, this is really awkward, but I’ve acquired a bit of a stalker and he’s kind of possessive, so keep an eye out, okay?
Tatiana
It’s really sweet that you are worried about me, but I can take care of myself. Have a good night, Ruby.
Well, that’s a clear dismissal if I’ve ever read one. I shove my phone back into my purse and rise. I can’t dodge a conversation with my parents indefinitely, but I sure as fuck can do it right now. Maybe by the time they track me down, I’ll actually know what to say. There’s no avoiding disappointing them—that ship has long since sailed—but surely there’s something that will make this less catastrophic?
I really wish I believed that.
I duck out of my room and hurry down the hall to the guest bedroom that has a conveniently placed window. The old oak outside is a perfect climbing tree that stretches just close enough to the wall to climb over. There’s a camera on the other side, but by the time they see me on the screen, I’ll be gone. I’ve never snuck out before, but I’ve imagined it thousands of times, thought of what I would do if I weren’t so determined to be a daughter who makes my parents proud.
This is not the action of an adult who wants to be taken seriously, but I’m tired, my nerves are frayed, and the reckless feeling that got me into this mess in the first place is still riding me hard. I need time and space to get my head on straight, and that won’t happen in my childhood home.
I catch a taxi the next street over and go back to the apartment I share with Luke. At least for now.
By the time I unlock the door and stumble inside, my adrenaline has run its course, leaving only exhaustion. The feeling only gets more pronounced when I peek into the bedroom and find the bed empty and undisturbed. Luke spent the night somewhere else... maybe with someone else.
An ache takes up residence in my chest. I don’t know him anymore. I don’t know myself anymore.
For reasons I’m not prepared to face, I pause only long enough to wash my face and change into a pair of cotton panties and one of Luke’s T-shirts before I walk back into the living room, grab the throw blanket, and lie down on the couch. Sleep takes me in seconds.
I wake sometime later, well before dawn, to the feeling of being watched. I open my eyes slowly to near-perfect darkness. What woke me?
I get my answer the moment I turn my head. He’s sitting on the coffee table, his elbows propped on his knees. The faint glow of the streetlights reflects on his leather gloves and the smooth material of his mask.
Wolf.
He’s in my apartment.
“I know you’re awake, baby.” His raspy voice feels like a stroke of a finger right over my pussy.
I turn onto my side to face him. “You shouldn’t be here.”
“Shh.” He raises a gloved finger to the curve of the teeth on his mask. “Don’t wake the boyfriend.”
I shoot a glance at the closed bedroom door. Did Luke come home after I fell asleep? True fear spikes through me. I may not love Luke anymore, but I did for a very long time. We had two years of happiness together, two years of soft moments and vulnerability and memories that I’ll cherish, even if we no longer fit together. I don’t want him hurt. I don’t want him dead . Wolf is more than capable of doing both.
I swallow hard. “Why are you here?”
“Should have stayed safe behind those spiked walls, baby. Instead you defied your parents and snuck out. How was I to take that, but as an invitation?” He hooks the corner of the blanket and tugs it slowly off me.
I’m perversely glad that I didn’t put on pants. Even without seeing his eyes, I can feel the heat of them on my exposed skin. I feel possessed, and if I believed in magic, I’d think he put a spell on me in that first text message. That’s a cop-out, though. The reality is that I tasted the truth of myself when I walked into that bar and chose to cheat on my boyfriend. Everything that’s happened in the wake of that decision rests solely on my shoulders. I could have put a stop to this the first night; I chose not to.
Just like I’m choosing not to stop it now.
“I should hate you,” I find myself saying. Confessing into the shadows between us. Of everyone, he has the most possibility of understanding. “You’re a monster. You’ve killed people. Stalked me. Threatened me.”
“Only with the consequences of your own actions.” He drops the blanket on the floor and drags a single finger from my ankle to my knee. “But you’re right. I’m a monster. It takes one to know one.”
“I’m not a monster.” But my knees fall open under the barest hint of his touch. And then open farther as his finger travels up my thigh to stop at the edge of my panties.
“You are.” He sounds so confident, as if he really believes it. As if he really knows me. “You’ve been wearing the mask of a good little girl for your entire life, but beneath it, your teeth are just as big as mine.” He drags a knuckle over my pussy. “Even before you knew me, you were willing to let people die for a taste of your pussy.”
“No.”
“Yes.” He presses hard against my clit, making me jerk. “You know what your parents are capable of. Do you really think they’d let that filthy prick stay among the living if they knew he fucked you?”
I open my mouth to say that of course they wouldn’t kill someone for such a silly reason, but it’s a lie. Isn’t part of the reason I never worried about Luke that he wasn’t in the life and we have rules? Those same rules apply to the people who owe their allegiance to my aunt.
My aunt watched what happened with my parents, how a romantic conflict with my mother almost lost the territory two of its best generals, and course corrected. Maybe even overcorrected. Unfortunately—or fortunately, depending on who you ask—my parents agreed with her. I think they would prefer I marry one of the spares from a different territory and dodge the potential pitfalls of elevating one enforcer above the others in our territory.
I knew that and I didn’t care. It’s not as if the rules are secret. Rafe knew it too. That doesn’t mean he deserved to die.
“You have to stop killing people.”
He snorts. The slight tension in his wrist is the only warning I get before he pushes my panties to the side and shoves two fingers into me. “I’ll stop killing your lovers when you stop fucking other people, baby. It’s as simple as that.”