Chapter 29
Chapter Twenty-Nine
brIDGET
Two days after I tell Erin, we're at D’Agostino’s. It’s not just Declan and me, which would be about a hundred times better, but everybody, because a bunch of birthdays overlap and they decided a massive get-together would be best.
Lorcan's here with a girl he's dating, and Kyla’s with her boyfriend. Bronwyn's snapping pictures, and Caitlin’s sitting next to Keenan, who looks considerably better than the last time I saw him. Colm smiles and waves, then stares at me a bit longer than usual.
Well, that’s strange.
Or maybe it isn’t. Maybe Declan’s younger brother has always seen more than he lets on, and I’ve just never been the focus of his attention before. I turn away, wishing I were invisible so I wouldn’t have to keep pretending at anything.
I'm almost happy to be here except for the fact that Declan is next to Valentina. I know we have to play it this way. I know he told me to trust him, but I hate every second of the two of them together—I hate it with the heat of a thousand burning suns.
She's across the room. It's not unusual because she's always somewhere where there's a large crowd of people. She's present, composed, and flawlessly dressed, and of course, Declan is perfect.
I’ve watched her enough at some of these events to have built a working map of her patterns.
She positions herself adjacent to Declan but is never reliant.
She answers questions with just enough to satisfy and never more.
She smiles at the right moments but lets her eyes drift a fraction of a second too soon.
It's taken me a long time to name what's bothering me about it.
It's not that I expected her to love him. How could she? And even though I hate the thought of him with someone who doesn’t love him, I thought I’d made my peace with it until I was standing in the same room watching it.
It's that she doesn't have to.
She doesn't have to be curious about him or intrigued by him or try to learn the particular nuances of who he is. She doesn't have to earn any of it. She just has to show up, look expensive, and let the arrangement do the rest.
And she'll get to keep him.
That's the part I can't swallow.
I know him. I know him in ways she hasn't bothered to learn and never will. I know him. I know what makes him laugh and what makes him sober. I know that little divot he gets between his eyes when he’s concentrating and how adorably boyish he looks when I call his name.
I know he sat on my sofa, elbows to knees, researching Irish baby names and pretending it was purely logistical.
She will stand next to him at the altar and take his name and his ring, and she doesn't know a single true thing about him.
I reach for my glass of Coke and drink it. I smile, looking at my phone, but I'm paying attention to her.
I know the McCarthys too. I have sat at enough tables, visited their homes, and befriended the people who make it run. They are my family.
And someone's fucking around with my family.
I watch her across the room again, laughing now at something Declan said. Or at least she’s faking it, but it's indistinguishable from an actual laugh.
I set my drink down.
The woman I've spent months stalking on social media has a full, unguarded laugh. I know it. I have watched it. I was pissed at how pretty she looked when she laughed. The woman across this room has the same face, the same hair, the same careful composure.
But she doesn't laugh like that.
I keep my expression neutral, and I don't look at Valentina again, because if I'm right…
I smile at Cavin when he appears next to me with another bottle of Coke.
“Another drink, lass?” he asks. “Heard you were quite the hero with Da.”
“Everybody keeps saying hero,” I say with an eye roll.
“That's because you were.” He taps his Coke bottle to mine.
I watch Keenan stretch his arm across Caitlin's shoulders and allow myself one moment to wish that was Declan and me. I pick up my phone to text Bronwyn when Colm drops into the seat on the right beside me. I look up in surprise.
“Hey.” Declan’s younger brother looks a lot like him. He could’ve been a younger version of Declan, with the same sharp, roguishly hot features, but he’s slightly shorter and bulkier. Caitlin says he’s a mini version of their father, Cormac.
“You’re looking well, lass,” he says with a smile.
“Thanks, Colm.” I smile, then look back at my phone.
“I mean it.” He leans in slightly. “Genuinely. There’s something different about you.”
Oh shut up, Colm.
I’ve always liked him and still do, but is it that obvious I’m pregnant? They say pregnant women glow.
“New moisturizer,” I say with a smile. “Amazing what they can bottle, isn’t it?”
He smiles before he leans in closer. “You seeing someone?” he asks quietly. I blink in surprise and look at him more closely. Is he… hitting on me?
I feel the shift in the air before I confirm it. Declan’s looking at us. I don’t turn my head. I don’t need to. Colm’s quick glance and frown do the work for me.
“No,” I say, which is technically true in all the ways that matter to Colm. I’m not seeing anyone. Hell, I skipped right over that part, didn’t I?
He considers that like a man who’s filing information away for later. “Right,” he says finally, with a small smile that doesn’t give anything away. I need to learn that skill myself.
The chair to my left scrapes back beside me, and Declan sits down.
Uh-oh.
He sets his drink on the table and doesn’t speak at first, his silence and presence bringing their own kind of weight.
“Colm.”
Colm glances between us and sits up straighter. “Dec.”
Declan’s his older brother, and I’ve never been more aware of that than I am right now. He leans over, his gaze assessing and stern. “Go find someone your own age to charm,” he says in the tone of a man who’s been in charge of his younger brother for most of his life.
“Right,” Colm says, frowning.
“There’s nothing right about it,” Declan says, his voice level and stern. “Go enjoy the party.”
Colm opens his mouth, then thinks better of it and stands. “Bridget,” he says with a nod, like none of it happened.
I stare at my Coke, my voice just above a whisper. “You didn’t have to do that.”
I glance at his hand on the table, six inches from mine.
He doesn’t move. Doesn’t touch me. Then he stands and stretches, as if he didn’t just half threaten his brother away from talking to me, and goes back to Valentina like he’s supposed to.
Colm watches both of us curiously, and so does Valentina.
My heart beats faster. Are we more obvious than I thought?
I pick up my phone and text Bronwyn quickly, my fingers flying over the keys.
Something isn’t right, girl
Down the table, I see her pick up her phone and text me back. My phone vibrates with a text just as I feel someone behind me. I blink, looking up. I didn’t even notice Valentina until she’s beside me. I glance quickly to see Declan talking to Seamus. He hasn’t noticed she’s here yet.
“You have a way with his family,” she says conversationally. Almost… warm. “They all love you.”
I shrug. “They’ve known me for a long time.”
“Mm.” She takes a sip of her drink. “Long enough they’d be really devastated if something happened to you, wouldn’t they?”
“Aye, I’d imagine.” My heart is beating too fast. Is she… threatening me?
“How lovely,” she says, “to be so necessary.”
With another smile, she turns and walks back to Declan, who’s staring at both of us with a frown.
People are starting to leave. I look at my phone.
Bronwyn
I KNOW, RIGHT? We need to chat. I’ve been doing some more research
I give one last glance toward Valentina and Declan. They’re standing close, like they’re meant to. She smiles at me, then intentionally turns around as if to dismiss me.
“I’m driving you home.” Declan suddenly appears beside me. He sees Colm standing by Seamus and points toward Valentina, as if silently telling his brother to make sure she gets home.
“I can get home on my own.”
Declan’s hand tightens on my shoulder as he leans in closer to me. “There’s something I need to tell you.” The look on his face tells me this costs him something, but honestly?
I’m not happy right now. I’m so fucking tired of this situation. And I’m trying to see things from his point of view, but goddamn it.
So I decide to go with him for the sheer reason of telling him to fuck off.
“Go,” he says, his tone brooking no argument. “Wait for me outside.” He opens the door and gestures, and I go, my anger rising with every step I take.
Outside, it’s cold and dark, and I stand on the steps with my arms crossed and my jaw tight, watching people trickle out of the restaurant. Valentina doesn’t even look at me as she walks past, as if I’m effectively dismissed.
Two minutes later, Declan comes through the door, sees me, and walks over. I bristle at his touch on my lower back as he steers me toward the car park.
“Don’t.” I don’t look at him.
He doesn’t say anything at first, just walks beside me, but I know him so well, I can feel his anger simmering. Fuck it, I know he doesn’t like this situation any more than I do, but he owes me more than this.
He opens my door, and I slide into the seat, reaching quickly for my seat belt before he does because he’s lost that privilege.
We drive toward mine, the music off, neither of us speaking.
I watch the streetlights and think about all the things I’m not saying out loud.
The pressure of it all sits heavy. I feel like I’m waiting for something to crack.
We drive all the way to the door outside my house. Behind us, I know my guards have parked a suitable distance away. They know we’re a couple at this point.
Who else does?
“Bridget.”
“I know. It’s fine, Declan. Whatever you’re about to say, it’s fine, alright? Because it’s always fine. Because it’s totally fine for you to threaten your brother when he gets too close to me, even though you have no intention of taking his place.”
“That’s not—”