29. Chapter 29
Chapter 29
Raena
“ I ’m so happy you’re back, Red. Don’t do that again. I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you.” Snow pulls away, giving my shoulders a squeeze before turning to clear the dishes from the table.
“I don’t plan on it, babe. Zreo out of ten– don’t recommend,” I joke, smiling at my beautiful friend. “So…fill me in. What did I miss while I was on my little impromptu ‘vacation’?”
Snow looks out the window where our guys are gathered, talking to the men outside. After eating the delicious food Snow had prepared for us, they got pulled outside for some kind of update from their men. She rubs her growing belly and smiles, but I see the exhaustion and worry in her eyes when she turns back to me. “It’s been…hard. Dax was shot when they rescued Em. I thought I’d lost him. Then we found out you were missing. I’ve been putting on a brave face for everyone, but I know this stress isn’t good for me. I’m so worried– all the time. What if something happens to the baby?”
“Oh, Snow, come here,” I say, standing from the table and rounding the island bar. Pulling her into my arms, I hug her like she’s done for me so many times. “I’m so sorry I dragged you into this.”
“No. None of that,” she pulls back, holding onto my arms. “You’re my family. I will always be there when you need me. It’s just with Dax being hurt, you kidnapped, and Jasper being gone, I’m just a mess right now. No one told me when you become a mother, the worry and fear for every little thing is so much bigger than it seems.”
She pulls me to the table, pulling out a chair and sitting down. She rubs her belly again, her tiny bump accentuated in her baby blue sundress.
“May I?” I ask, sitting across from her and reaching for her, wanting to feel the life growing inside her as a pang of hurt hits me in the gut. She pulls my hand to her bump. “No one told me either, you know. I lived through every mother’s worst nightmare, so trust me when I tell you, it never stops. I wish I had words of wisdom to calm you down and ease your worry. But I’m a mess, right there with you. I haven’t seen my daughter in two years. She won’t remember me at all.”
A sob breaks free from my throat, overwhelming me with sadness. Emera has lived two whole years away from me. She was a baby when King took her. I don’t know what she went through. I don’t know how much damage that monster did when I wasn’t there to protect my baby.
“Red, look at me,” Snow says softly, placing her hand on top of mine. “She’s safe. I promise. She’s the most beautiful little girl I’ve ever seen. She has your eyes– so intensely green, like emeralds shining in the sunlight. And that smile… When she smiled at those gorgeous men of yours, her whole world lit up. She is perfect. You’ll see. And no, she might not remember you, but she gets her mother back. I would give anything to have a second chance with my mother. It’ll all work out, I promise. Once you lay eyes on her and feel her in your arms, none of this will even matter.”
“Okay,” I sigh. She’s right. Nothing will matter once I see her– hold her. Everything I’ve been through will fade into the background once my daughter is back with me where she belongs. We will figure out the rest as we go. As a family. A smile slips over my face as I rub her swollen belly once more, “You’re going to be a great mom, you know that? This is one lucky kid.”
“Remind her of that when she’s 16 and hates me,” she laughs, patting my hand before getting up and going back into the kitchen.
“It’s a girl?”
“Oh we don’t know yet for sure, but I feel like it is. Fingers crossed. Our girls can grow up and torment us together.”
“And if it’s a boy?” I laugh, following her into the kitchen to help clean up while we wait for the guys to come back in.
“Well, we can arrange their marriage and be crazy old mother-in-laws together.” We both laugh, washing the dishes and putting everything away. We plan our hypothetical futures and revel in the fact that we have futures at all. Neither of us should still be here, but we didn’t let the cruelness of the world stand in our way. I’m incredibly grateful that I met Snow, and she’s become more than just my friend. She’s right. We’re family. I grew up an only child, but when I imagine what it would be like to have sisters, Snow and Ella would be my sisters. Dax, Ronan, and Jasper would be my overprotective big brothers who would scare away the boys.
By the time we’ve got the kitchen clean, my heart doesn’t feel so broken and hopeless. I survived– again. And my heart is full of love and laughter. The brokenness I feel doesn’t feel so hopeless right now. I’ve got my family, my Shadows, and my daughter. We’re all alive and safe. I’m choosing to hold onto this feeling for now. I refuse to let King win. He might’ve escaped, but he’s just prolonging the inevitable. We’ll find him, and when we do…
My thoughts are cut short when the front door swings open and our guys come in. Snow and I are on the couch in the living room, sipping some tea she made for us. Their serious faces put me on alert immediately.
“What’s wrong? Is it Emera? What happened?” I’m up and meeting them before they’ve even had a chance to speak. I can feel it in my bones. Something is very wrong.
“No- no. It’s not Em. Here, sit down.” Royal says, leading me back to the couch next to Snow. Dax and Ronan stand behind her, resting a hand on each of her shoulders.
“Well, what is it? You’re freaking me out,” I ask, sitting down as Royal takes my hands in my lap and kneels in front of me.
“I’m so sorry, Raena. Ella’s mom just called. Someone set a fire at Twisted. It’s gone.”
“What the fuck? No! Who would do that? Why?”
“You know who did this, Angel,” Royal says sympathetically.
King.
“Of fucking course, it was King. That’s where they found me.”
“Well... It’s not just that. We burned his house down when we got you out of there. This is his retaliation. And Raena, it’s not just Twisted.”
“Where?” Chills run up my spine. The only two other places he knows about are The Shadows house and…
“Your Grams’ cottage. I’m so sorry. It’s gone, too.”
If I wasn’t sitting, I have no doubt my legs would buckle. Grams’ cottage. I didn’t want to go back there until everything with King was settled. But of course he had to take one more fucking thing from me that I can’t get back. The boulder sitting on my chest feels like it weighs a thousand pounds. I’ve lost everything that belonged to her now.
“In the back of my mind, I thought it would always be there– waiting for me to be ready to go back,” I say. My voice echoes in my ears and my vision swims around the edges. “I’ve lost so much. He’s taken so much.”
“We know, Baby Girl. We won’t let him take anything else from you. I promise,” Alek says, leaning down behind me to kiss the top of my head.
The desolate feeling dissipates as rage fills my veins. I hold onto that anger, latching onto it with both hands. I need it. It’s the only strength I have left. My whole body is shaking with it. “I fucking hate him so much.”
“So do we. He won’t get away with this. Any of this. We will hunt him with you to the ends of the Earth, if that’s what it takes to quench your thirst for vengeance.” Royal squeezes my hands as he makes a vow to help me. I want to let them. I don’t want to do this on my own anymore. But I can’t.
“No. King has literally tried to take everything from me. I won’t allow him to take you, too. Any of you. I— I fucked up. King knows I’ve been with you. I’m so sorry. He’s going to come after you next. I know it. I can’t allow that. I need to leave. Please let me go.” My panic reaches an altitude I didn’t know was possible as I try to stand from the couch, my labored breathing making me dizzy. Royal doesn’t let me stand, blocking me in with his ridiculously hard body.
“Whoa— stop. You’re going to pass out. Breathe. Put your head between your knees.” Alek’s voice filters through my panic, and he pushes my shoulders to make me bend at the waist. I try to take in deep, measured breaths to calm the war waging inside me– fear and rage battling for dominance. I will not let King hurt them like he’s hurt me. I have to protect Emera from her evil, rapist father, who will likely turn her out to his disgusting and equally evil friends.
Over my dead body, will I ever let that happen.
“I can’t– I need to–” I don’t even know what I’m trying to say right now, but it’s coming out broken and unintelligible.
“Move.” I hear Alek say right before Royal’s boots disappear from my view of the floor and bigger ones replace them. Massive arms lift me up, pulling me into his chest in the most protective, warm embrace. “I’ve got you, Baby Girl. Breathe with me.”
Sitting on the couch, he rocks me back and forth, one hand in my hair holding my head to his chest and the other running up and down my back, soothing me. We stay like this until my breathing returns to normal and I feel so relaxed in his arms that I feel like I could sleep for days.
“That’s it. You’re okay,” Alek whispers into my hair. “I’ve got you.”
“I can’t let him hurt you. You all mean too much to me. He won’t stop. I need you to take Emera far, far away and let me kill him.”
“No. We do this together. He’s running scared. We took out his home and most of his men with it. We outnumber him now. We’ll get him. You’re not doing this alone, Angel. That will never fucking happen, so just get that out of your pretty little head. This is our fight. And we fight it together.” Royal says, sinking down on the couch next to us, finding my eyes, he holds me hostage in his icy depths.
He’s right. On a deep level, I’m barely able to function amidst the terror wrecking me at the moment. I know he’s right. I can do this alone… I think. But I don’t have to. We’re in this together now, and that somehow calms my racing heart and chaotic thoughts.
I’m not alone.
I don’t have to face the Monster on my own anymore. We stand a better chance of success if we work together.
“Together?” I ask, searching his face for any doubt but not finding any. It’s not lost on me that I have trust issues– and a hard time accepting help. We’ll chalk it up to the trauma I’ve endured when not one single person even looked for me, much less saved me. But these men have kept their word. They came for me. I mean, I’d almost killed everyone before they got there, but that’s neither here nor there. They still showed up. They came. My breathing returns to mostly normal, and I lift my hand to cup Royal’s face. “We fight together.”
“There she is,” he replies, mirroring me and holding my face in his warm, tattooed hand. “We just got you back, Angel. We won’t be letting you go anywhere. Now, we’ve got a little girl to call and check on. Are you ready?”
My heart skips a beat and nervous excitement floods me and I smile. “Yes! Let’s call her.”
Sitting up in Alek’s lap, I run my fingers through my now dry, messy curls. I’m so nervous I could puke. All the ‘what-if’ scenarios flash through my mind, threatening to overwhelm me until Maddox steps into my view. His fingers play with the wild tendrils curled on my chest. His eyes meet mine.“You look beautiful. She’s going to love you, pretty girl. You’re her mother.”
Shoving down the fears and stuffing them in the lock box in my mind where things I can’t control live, I blow out a heavy, steadying breath, nodding at them. “I’m ready. Let’s call them.”
Alek taps something on his phone before handing it to me. My messy red curls and puffy eyes fill the screen as it rings. Before I can freak out about how shitty I actually look, my best friend's face pops up, and the dam breaks.
“Oh my god! You’re back. They got you. Holy shit– I mean, shoot! Rae!” Ella’s reaction makes me laugh through the tears streaming down my face, and I don’t even really care that I’m not alone and everyone is watching me lose my shit…again.
“Ella! I’m okay. Are you? Is she? Where is she?” My questions rush out faster than I can contain them. I need to see my daughter. Right the fuck now.
“Oh Rae, she’s perfect. We’re okay. She’s playing with Jasper– see.” The screen flips, and a picturesque scene from a storybook plays out on the screen. Snowflakes flutter all around them as Jasper holds her up to wrap a piece of black fabric around a lopsided little snowman. Emera giggles when they bump in the makeshift nose, and the carrot tumbles into the white powder that frosts the ground. “She’s absolutely perfect, Raena.”
Alek holds me tighter, tracing circles on my back as everyone crowds behind us to watch the two of them playing in the snow. I don’t need to look to know there’s not a dry eye in this room.
After a few minutes, Ella’s face comes back onto the screen. “Do you want me to call them over here so you can meet her?”
“No. I’m a mess– and I don’t want to confuse her. I just wanted to see her with my own eyes.” Even as I say it, a sob breaks free from my throat. I want to do so much more than see her through the screen. I want her in my arms. But I can’t. It’s not safe. And it won’t be until we’ve dealt with King for good.
“I’ve got her, I promise. Is he dead? Is it over?”
I don’t want to tell her this over the phone, but I can’t keep it from her either. I won’t. “No. And no. He escaped. Don’t worry, we’ll find him, but El, something happened here.”
“What happened? Is my mom okay?” Now it’s her turn to panic, but I shut that down before it can take root inside her.
“She’s okay. No, don’t worry about your mom. We’ve got her. It’s King. He’s on a warpath. Ella, he…he burned down Twisted– and Grams’ cottage. They're gone. I’m so fucking sorry.” My voice breaks, emotion slicing through me again like a knife. As much as Grams’ cottage means to me, Twisted means as much to Ella, if not more. It’s a piece of her father she will never get back. I know how that feels, but my heart still breaks for my friend, even more so now that I know this is my fault. She’s involved because of me. King wouldn’t have dragged her into this war if I wouldn’t have been there when they found me. Fucking bastard.
“Wh-what?” She asks after a second of processing what I said. “Was my staff there? Are they okay? Is anyone hurt?”
Royal speaks up, turning the phone to show his ridiculously handsome face on the screen. “No. No one was there. The place was empty.”
“And Gram’s place too? I’m so sorry, Rae. I’m so fucking sorry. That bastard!” Ella spits, angry tears spilling down her flawless cheeks.
“It’s okay. We’re all alive and that’s what matters most. No one was injured, and I promise, we will rebuild everything. We will get him. I swear it.” My anger is a tangible thing now, like I could reach out and grab it. Alek tightens his hold on me. Royal turns the phone back to me. “He won’t get away with this, Ella. You have my word.”
“I don’t care about that. As long as no one was hurt, nothing else matters. You are more important to me than that building will ever will be. We’ll rebuild. It will be fine. I just fucking hate he’s still breathing after everything he’s done.” She swipes the tears lingering on her face like she can wipe away the hurt I know she’s feeling.
“We’ll take care of him. In the meantime, just stay safe, and please…take care of my daughter. I can’t lose her again. I won’t survive.”
“Rae… she’s my only priority. I’ve got her. With my life.” Tears well in her eyes once more. “She is amazing, girl. She’s beautiful and kind. Despite everything she’s lived through, you’d never know it. She’s strong, like her mother.”
A watery smile breaks through the sob that spills out of me. “As soon as King is dealt with, I’m on my way. I can’t wait.”
“We’ll be here waiting. Hurry up. I miss you so much, bitch.” Ella laughs to break the heaviness of the moment. It’s too much. Seeing her and not being able to hold her. I appreciate the reprieve and smile back at her.
“I miss you, too. We’ll talk soon. I love you. Hold her tight and kiss her for me, El.”
Hanging up the phone, the only connection I've had with my daughter in two years is quite possibly the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. Alek holds me in his arms while I break, whispering soothing words into my heart.
Snow and Dax excuse themselves to go call Jasper. I know she’s missing a piece of her family right now, too. Maddox and Royal surround me and Alek, and somehow their support right now is all I need. Eventually, the tears dry up, and I feel more at peace with the situation than I had before.
King will get what’s coming to him.
We will bring Emera home.
We will survive this.
Sitting up, I wipe away the evidence of my sorrow from my face and look at the men I love– the men who’ve shattered all of my carefully constructed, bulletproof walls in just a few weeks. With them, I feel safe, loved, cared for– in a way I’ve never felt before in my life. Sure, Grams loved me, but this feeling…this kind of love, it’s different. It’s not obligational or conditional. It’s a pure, all-consuming kind of love that should scare the shit out of me. But it doesn’t. It feels like…home.
My smile is genuine when I look into their eyes. “So what now?”
The smile Maddox returns lets his psychotic energy shine bright. “Now, my Bloody Queen, you get to come see your surprise.”