Chapter 30
Back to Real Life
BAZ
“Oh fuck!” Lanie groaned, looking out the window to what awaited us in her foyer.
“What?” I tried to pull myself together.
Only Lanie could manage to make a short hop from Berlin to London City so entertaining.
“That’s my mother’s coat,” Lanie nodded at a red coat hanging in the hall.
“I’m sorry. What?”
“She was at my brother’s earlier. And now, she’s… here.”
“Well, hopefully they are here to get you and not me, Lanie,” I said.
“Oh, we’re both in for a ride.”
It took me a minute to settle into this. I was disoriented being properly inside her house for the first time. We expected no one to be home. She said she’d swap out one pair of clothing for another. But now, I would have to face her mother? This was not good.
Lanie’s sister, Dora Elizabeth, arrived, looking concerned.
“Mum is here,” she whispered. “But, she’s walking the garden with Daphne. So, you have time if you want to flee.”
Who is Daphne?
“Why?”
“She wanted to catch you, I suppose?” The girl turned to me, arms crossed. “And you don’t have anything to say for yourself?”
“Me?” I pointed to myself
“Is there another person here who married my sister without telling anyone or so much as explaining himself? Lanie, how could you?”
“I will explain it all later,” Lanie brushed her sister’s demands off. “For now, I just need to grab a few things from my closet and leave. Can you stall her?”
“I don’t think you will make it. She’s bound to come up. Daphne will sniff out trouble.”
Who is Daphne?
“Why is Daphne here?”
“Daphne came in on business. Where the hell have you been?”
“Germany.”
“Why?”
“Dora Elizabeth, I need to go. Come, Baz. And bring my luggage.”
She said it to me like I was a servant, which I resented.
However, in a panicked state, I couldn’t be too picky.
My response with all mothers of women I slept with was to run for the hills, and Danna Delphine was no different.
I lugged her suitcase upstairs, ever more annoyed with these shenanigans.
“Lanie, what is the plan here? I think I should leave.”
What?” Lanie fumbled in her closet and tossed a luxurious overnight bag out.
“I said I think I should leave.”
Lanie called from her closet, “You will do no such thing. You do not get to desert me here. I’ve already gotten a tongue-lashing from her. I’m not doing it again alone. You’re half of this.”
“And why when it is your mother, is it my half?”
Lanie appeared, leaning on her closet doorframe. “Baz, I need her to go back to Chicago. You need the same reprieve. Trust me when I say, if we don’t kiss the ring, she’s not going home. She will be here—every fucking day—until she breaks me.”
I groaned and sat on the bed, head in my hands. “Who is Daphne?”
“My sister. Daphne Delphine. You know of her, Baz. She was married to—”
I remembered. “I’m sorry. I do. She’s Chandler’s ex. He’s a cunt.”
“Agreed. She’s fine, but pregnant. So, she’s moody. But she’s a businesswoman and will understand this more than Mum who is just—”
“Irrational?”
“No. Mum isn’t irrational. She’s vengeful.
” Delanie approached and put her hands on my shoulders sweetly.
“Expect Mum to be rude. Please don’t go off on her.
It will only be worse for you. She’ll come around once she realizes you aren’t your dad’s carbon copy, Baz.
If she can accept Daphne marrying Dad’s best friend after he died, she can handle you. ”
“My parents are nuts,” Lanie said. “Sorry… Dad was nuts. For the record, I don’t want six children. But Daphne is about to be halfway there. I doubt any of us will reach that degree of fecundity, though.”
“What?” I asked. “I thought it was just the one.”
“She’s pregnant with twins. Mum is pissed cuz she didn’t tell her that she was even pregnant. I’m on the shit list because I accidentally let that slip the last time I saw them.”
“Not because you married a dodgy Brit?”
Lanie giggled, “That, too. One who is in a mood today. Expect Mum to be rude. Please don’t go off on her. It will only be worse for you. She’ll come around once she realizes you aren’t your dad’s carbon copy, Baz.”
“I’m just… I am not used to dealing with family.”
“And you don’t want to be obligated?”
I ruminated. I could blow smoke, and she’d call me on it, or I could be vulnerable. For the first time, I decided to try the latter approach first.
I stood, taking her hands. “Yes, honestly. I hate this bit. I don’t know how to handle parents. I didn’t really have any. But also, because I have a feeling she’s about to shout at you and anyone shouting at you is bound to set me off.”
Lanie’s jaw dropped unexpectedly.
“What? Was that too much. Am I supposed to let her yell at you? You’re a grown woman Lanie and—”
Lanie squeezed my hand, prompting me to stop. “It’s fine, if not a bit unexpected. If we’re being honest, I love the aggro version of you, Baz. Just know you own me only when I let you. I own the conversation.”
A smile crossed my face. “You are so confident, darling.”
“I am because I know my place,” Lanie said.
I leaned in, unable to resist kissing Lanie.
Her defiant streak always did that. I kissed her, gripping her hair firmly.
She balled my shirt up in her hands hard.
We pawed at one another, snogging like desperate teenagers in a backseat until we heard footsteps.
I straightened my tie, and she departed to the vanity.
Delanie corrected her lipstick in a mirror she always carried, trying to grasp a shred of respectability.
Given all the places her lips had been in the past few hours, my lips were the most benign.
Thankfully, the person who had come up the steps wasn’t Danna, it was again the family’s sweet, youngest child.
“Mum knows you’re here. She saw your shoes. She wants everyone downstairs for tea in the drawing room. I’m sorry, but I tried.”
Lanie looked over. “Fine. I know you did, sweetheart. We’ll come down.”
Downstairs in the well-appointed formal reception room sat a woman I recognized slightly, Daphne, and a man I did not. Her sister and the man I assumed was her brother-in-law stood. Her mother sat, as if holding court.
“Oh, he came, too,” Lanie nodded in the man’s direction.
“I’m here for an official meeting. She came because I came,” the man said. “Blame me, I guess?”
“I’ll forgive you,” Lanie hugged him.
“Everyone, this is Baz. Baz, you know Dora. But, Mum, Daphne, and Cal, this is Baz. Baz, this is my mother, my sister, Daphne, and her husband, Cal Markham. I’d like it if we could be respectful.”
“Cal is the Mayor of Chicago,” Danna said. “He’s very busy.”
I insinuated all I did for a living was fuck off. She was trying hard already to get under my skin. Sadly, my father painted in back-handed compliments and barbs like that, so she’d have to try harder.
“Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” I said. “All of you.”
“For the record, Lanie, I have met your beau before. Except he was a very young child, and his father was there trying to take all my family’s wealth and property. Lord Osgoode wanted nothing but to subjugate me.”
I cleared my throat and sat. I followed Lanie’s advice, even if it pained me. Danna Carlisle was not here to make peace. She intended to throw her weight around. I expected someone demurer. After all, she’d been married to a very powerful man and produced six children in that time.
“I will say this,” I began, voice calm, “because I want to clear the air. It has never been my intention to subjugate your daughter. In fact, I don’t think any man ever could. I care for her and respect her. I am sorry for the pain Father caused you, Lady Danna.”
She rolled her eyes. “Talk is cheap, darling.”
“It is,” I agreed. “All I can promise is that I will show you in my actions how much I care. That includes keeping to my word about Braemoor, ma’am.”
“We know about your agreement,” Danna offered. “I think it’s rubbish and exploitative and I’d like you to get an annulment.”
I flushed bright red, wondering if this was the feeling everyone else got when they were supposed to be doing the right thing. What has Lanie done to me!?
“Oh, we don’t keep secrets, Lord Osgoode,” Daphne added. “That is something you will learn about us. Nor is it our job to make you feel warm and fuzzy. We love Delanie to the ends of the Earth. Our obligation is only to her.”
“It’s not an ambush, mother,” Daphne groaned.
“Like hell it’s not,” Lanie crossed her legs neatly.
“And not to be a caveman, but we do have concerns,” Cal said. “Of course, as I’ve said, I do want to hear your side of the story.”
The youngest Delphine chimed, “Yes, I’d like that, too!”
“Can we just all go about our business?” Lanie asked. “We’re married. It’s done. I’m not getting an annulment. Move on.”
“It really makes sense to think about it, and Daphne has looked into it.”
Daphne’s face pulled, pained. I knew as well as she did an annulment in Britain was nearly impossible. Lanie and I wouldn’t qualify. I knew their mother probably knew that deep down as well, but was so disgusted by the idea of us together that she wouldn’t hear reason.
“Can I speak?” Lanie said, annoyed.
“Go on,” Danna scoffed. “Tell us how lovely this business relationship is. Or is it more than that? Because I do not like either idea, but prefer one to the other.”
Lanie looked to me. I knew a response from her wouldn’t satisfy the matriarch.
“I adore your daughter. To me, this is not business as usual. I promised to take care of her. I promised to take care of any children we have.”
“But that is all it is? It’s a box to tick.”
Rage took over. I growled, “Lady Danna, look at your daughter, please. Tell me she is little more than a box to tick!”
Danna recoiled, surprised by my voice. For a moment, the room fell silent. As if on cue, another woman entered.
“Ma’am, the baby is awake. Would you like me to bring her down?”
I assumed that was Daphne’s nanny.
“I’ll grab her,” Cal said.
I wished I could follow him. We drank coffee in quiet, no one brave enough to say the next thing as we waited for the child to greet us.
In a few minutes, a cherubic, happy toddler arrived.
I couldn’t help but see Lanie’s face light up.
It would be no trouble to condition her to the idea of having children—and soon.
Meanwhile, it didn’t convince me it was a good idea.
I regretted how adorable the baby was. This was a losing battle.
Lanie’s mother spoke, “Lord Osgoode, you do realize that Lanie is about to leave and shoot a television program for two months in Wales?”
I didn’t know that, but couldn’t admit my lack of awareness. “We agreed that I wouldn’t interfere in her work. She won’t interfere in mine.”
“So, you won’t use her for political gain—like to fly her to Germany to charm their cabinet ministers?” Daphne asked, prickly.
I gathered being a political wife probably made her more attuned to that dance.
“Daphne, that is a ridiculous assumption!” Lanie declared. “Do assume I’m sort of dupe? A pawn?”
“What is truly ridiculous is you assuming he cares about you,” Danna deflected.
I took a deep breath. “How can I prove to you all that I’m not full of shite? What do you need from me? I am willing to try. Are you?”
There was no time for a response. My mobile rang. It was Alex.
“Apologies. This is my brother. I need to take this.”
I could sense the Delphine Delegation shot me daggers as I escaped the assault. It wasn’t that I wanted to speak with Alexander. However, I’d take any reason to diffuse the situation.
“Baz,” Alexander said. “I need you to come home immediately.”
“What now?”
“Dad is dead.”
A rush of relief I’d been waiting on for months—if not years—overcame me.
“Oh… okay,” I said.
“No apologies? No condolences?”
“What do you want? A sonnet on how I miss him already? Would that be accurate, brother?”
“Well, for someone who just inherited a vast estate despite his true disdain for you, you could be more sympathetic for the people who cared about him.”
I rolled my eyes. “Lanie and I will return shortly. We may have guests. Her family are in town. I am certain they would like to pay their respects.”
Or to dance on his grave.