Chapter 16
Connor
The ride back to McGrath ranch was quiet.
I sat in the passenger seat of Ryder’s truck, my hand on his upper thigh as he drove through Hell Creek.
Outside the streetlights bathed the town in a nostalgic yellow light.
Between the dark, the stars, and the fog rolling down from the mountains, we could’ve slipped back in time without even noticing.
All that mattered was Ryder’s warm thigh under my hand and the quickened pace of my own heart.
It was becoming obvious that I was in far deeper than felt safe.
I told myself that I wouldn’t get involved with Ryder at all, but clearly that wasn’t a promise I’d been able to keep to myself.
At first, I thought Ryder would just give up.
A month of solitude was a lot to ask of an impatient pup who was used to getting his own way.
But he surprised me. Then everything with his father happened and now I was riding in his truck, my hand on his thigh, and my cum in his belly.
And the worst part was, I didn’t even care.
I was scared, yes, but not regretful. I wanted to be with Ryder.
There was just something about him, something that drew me in.
Maybe it was that we were both deeply broken people, or that I felt I could make him happy in some way.
I’d always been a fixer when it came to relationships, something that had gotten me in trouble more than once.
But how could I turn him away? He was so cute, and sexy, and…
obedient. It made the dom inside me squirm with joy.
And that ice wall I’d built around my heart during seven years of prison was melting far faster than anticipated.
The truck hit a pothole, breaking my train of thought. I glanced over at Ryder, his profile outlined in the dim light from the dashboard. He looked more relaxed than I’d seen him in days, his lips curved in a slight smile as he navigated the familiar road back to the ranch.
“What?” he asked, catching me staring.
“Nothing,” I said, giving his thigh a gentle squeeze. “Just thinking.”
“About how screwed we are if my dad catches us?” His tone was light, but I could hear the underlying concern.
I sighed, my thumb tracing small circles on his denim-covered leg. “Among other things.”
The truth was, I was terrified. Not just of Pete finding out, but of what was happening between Ryder and me.
This wasn’t supposed to happen. I’d spent seven years in prison learning to keep everyone at arm’s length, convincing myself I would never let anyone in again.
It was safer that way. No attachments meant no one could hurt you, no one could betray you.
But Ryder had somehow slipped through those defenses like they were made of paper.
“You know,” Ryder said, breaking the silence, “I’ve been thinking about what happens next.”
“Next?” I echoed, suddenly tense.
“With my life,” he clarified. “I can’t stay at Nelson Ranch forever. And I can’t go back home, not after everything that happened.”
Relief washed over me. He wasn’t talking about us, about whatever this relationship was becoming. “Have you figured anything out?”
“Maybe,” he said, turning onto the gravel road that led to the ranch. He slowed the truck, clearly in no hurry to arrive. “Cole mentioned before the wedding that he might have a position for me at Nelson. Nothing fancy, just ranch hand work to start, but...”
“But it would be yours,” I finished for him. “Something you earned, not something given to you.”
He nodded, a determined set to his jaw. “Exactly. I’ve spent my whole life being Pete McGrath’s son. Maybe it’s time I figure out who Ryder is on his own.”
Pride swelled in my chest. The spoiled kid I’d met two months ago was growing up right before my eyes. “I think that’s a good idea.”
“What about you?” he asked, glancing my way. “What happens when your parole is up?”
It was a question I’d been avoiding. My six months at McGrath Ranch would be over soon, and then what? I’d have my freedom, but freedom to do what? Go where?
“I don’t know,” I admitted. “I’ve got some money saved. Not much, but enough to get me started somewhere.”
“Somewhere,” Ryder repeated, his voice carefully neutral. “Like where?”
I recognized the real question he was asking. Would I stay in Hell Creek? Would I stay near him?
“I haven’t thought that far ahead,” I said honestly. “I spent seven years planning and dreaming about what my life would be once I left. But now that I’m here… I’m not sure what to do. I’m just taking it one day at a time.”
“Where would you go?” Ryder asked, his voice soft but loaded with meaning. “If you could choose anywhere.”
The question hung between us, heavier than it should have been. I hadn’t allowed myself to think that far ahead. Prison taught me to focus on surviving the present, not dreaming about futures that might never come.
“I don’t know,” I said finally. “Somewhere quiet, maybe. A place where nobody knows my name or my past.”
Ryder’s grip tightened on the steering wheel. “So not Hell Creek.”
I heard the disappointment in his voice, saw the slight slump of his shoulders as he navigated the truck along the winding road. My hand moved up his thigh, squeezing gently.
“I didn’t say that,” I told him. “It’s just... I’ve spent so long being defined by my mistakes. By that one decision that cost me seven years of my life.”
“What happened?” Ryder asked, slowing the truck as we approached the ranch entrance. He pulled off to the side of the road, killing the engine but leaving the headlights on, illuminating the empty stretch ahead.
I took a deep breath. I hadn’t told this story to anyone since my trial, but something about the darkness of the truck cab, about Ryder’s quiet presence beside me, made it possible.
“I was seeing this guy,” I said, letting out a long sigh. “One that I shouldn’t have ever let into my life.” I glanced over at Ryder, shaking my head. “But he was young and cute and he liked to play games. And I didn’t know any better not to take the bait.”
There was a long pause as I gathered up my courage.
“His name was Cody,” I continued, staring out the windshield. “Met him at some bar in Billings. He was everything I thought I wanted. Young, hot as hell, and seemed to worship the ground I walked on. Turns out he was just using me.”
Ryder turned in his seat to face me, giving me his full attention. The dashboard lights cast shadows across his face, making him look older, more serious.
“He convinced me to do a drug run with him. Said it was easy money, that we’d never get caught.” I laughed bitterly. “I’d done tons of them before. That’s how I ended up in juvie the first time. I was trying to turn my life around. But I was so fucking gone on him that I agreed. Like an idiot.”
“What happened?” Ryder asked softly.
“We got pulled over for a broken taillight. Just our luck, right? Except it wasn’t luck at all.
” My jaw clenched at the memory. “Cody had set the whole thing up. He was working with the cops to reduce his own sentence from a previous bust. The drugs were real, and the sex was real, but the run was fake. He’d already tipped them off about where we’d be and when. ”
“Jesus Christ,” Ryder breathed. “What a piece of shit.”
“Yeah,” I nodded, my hand unconsciously tightening on his thigh. “I got seven years for trusting him. He walked away free and clear.”
“And you never saw him again?”
“Oh, I saw him,” I said darkly. “At the trial. He testified against me, wouldn’t even look me in the eye. Just stared at the floor and recited his lines like he’d practiced them. He spun up a history of drug dealing that fit my record and the judge believed him. Why wouldn’t he?”
The memory still burned, even after all these years. The betrayal had cut deeper than any knife could have. I’d trusted Cody, had even started to fall for him. And he’d used me up and spit me out as soon as it benefited him.
“That’s why I was so hard on you in the beginning,” I admitted. “The way you pushed and teased... it reminded me of him. Of how I let myself be manipulated.”
Ryder covered my hand with his, his touch warm and reassuring. “I’m not him,” he said firmly. “I promise.”
“I know that now,” I said, meeting his eyes. “But back then, all I saw was another spoiled kid playing games, not caring who got hurt as long as he got what he wanted.”
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I never meant to—”
“I know,” I cut him off gently. “You’re nothing like him, not really. But that’s why I can’t risk going back to prison, Ryder. I lost seven years of my life because I let myself get carried away by someone. I can’t lose any more.”
He was quiet for a moment, processing everything I’d shared. Then he leaned across the center console and kissed me softly. It wasn’t passionate or demanding, just a simple connection, a wordless promise.
“I have nothing to gain by turning you in for some made-up crime,” he said, his fingers dancing across my jaw. “And I won’t let that happen to you either.”
“What if someone else does?” I asked, the fear that had been gnawing at me finally coming to the surface.
“Your dad has connections. If he finds out about us, all he has to do is make one phone call to my parole officer. One accusation that I’ve been inappropriate with you, and I’m back in a cell before I can even defend myself. ”
Ryder’s face hardened with determination. “He won’t find out.”
“You can’t guarantee that.” I shifted in my seat to face him fully. “We’re playing with fire, Ryder. And I’m the only one who gets burned if we’re caught.”
“I won’t let that happen,” he insisted, gripping my hand tightly. “Besides, Dad doesn’t even know I’m back at the ranch tonight. He thinks I’m still at Nelson’s. And you’re supposed to be in the bunkhouse. No one will see us.”
I wanted to believe him. God, I wanted to. But seven years in prison had taught me that hope was a dangerous thing. It could make you careless, make you forget the consequences lurking just around the corner.
“I can’t lose my freedom again,” I whispered, the words catching in my throat. “Not even for you.”
Something flickered across Ryder’s face… hurt, maybe, or understanding. He looked down at our intertwined hands.
“So, what are you saying?” he asked quietly. “That we stop? That whatever this is between us ends before it really starts?”
The thought made my chest ache in a way I wasn’t prepared for.
“I’m saying we need to be careful,” I finally replied. “More careful than we’ve been. No risks, no chances. Not until I’m free and clear.”
“How long until your parole is up at the ranch?” Ryder asked, a note of hope returning to his voice.
“Four months,” I said. “Four more months, and I’m a free man.”
“Four months,” he repeated, his fingers tracing patterns on my palm. “We can be careful for four months.”
I looked at him, this beautiful young man who’d defied his father, who was still wearing my cock ring under his clothes, who’d knelt for me without hesitation. The thought of walking away from him now seemed impossible. But the thought of returning to prison was unbearable.
“We’ll have to set some rules,” I said finally. “No meeting at the ranch. No contact when your father might see. No taking chances.”
Ryder nodded eagerly. “I can do that. I’ll be so good, Connor. I promise.”
There it was again, that earnest desire to please that made something primal stir inside me. He’d called me ‘sir’ earlier, had submitted to me so beautifully. And now he was promising to be good, to follow my rules. What more could I ask for?
“And we can only meet on my days off. No more mid-week meetings like this.” I let my hand drift up his thigh, thumb brushing over his groin. “Even if they are a lot of fun.”
“O-Okay,” Ryder sighed, clearly not thrilled about how limited our together time would be. “I can do that. It sucks, but I want you to trust me. I want to be good for you, sir.”
There was that word again, the one that sent electricity buzzing through my cock.
I leaned in close, pulling him into a kiss once more.
This time I held him in place by his jaw, my tongue forcing its way into his mouth.
He moaned against me, turning to jelly in my fingers.
God it was intoxicating the way he submitted to me.
“Good boy,” I muttered against his lips, feeling him melt against me. “Good boy.”