Chapter 20
Connor
The day seemed to slip by in a blissful haze of sex, cuddling, and sex again.
By the time the sun went down, I was so tired and used up that I could barely think.
Seven years without sex gave me a lot to catch up on and Ryder…
well, he’d taken every damn drop of cum I had in my body and then some. I don’t think I’d ever felt better.
We sat out at the edge of the creek together, still naked, with a blanket wrapped around us. Together we watched the sun sink below the horizon and the fireflies light up the tall grass. It was a gorgeous night made even more beautiful by the man sitting next to me.
Maybe it was the fact he wore my cock ring without question, or maybe it was because I’d been so lonely for so long, or maybe it was just the plain fact that I was happy.
Whatever it was, I was grateful to be there with Ryder at my side.
And the feelings I had toward him… well, they were quickly becoming about something more than sex.
Then again, I supposed that had been happening for a while, I just wasn’t ready to admit it.
Ryder sat between my legs, his back against my chest. My arms were wrapped around his shoulders, holding the blanket around us both.
He seemed content, sighing now and then as if everything in the world was finally right.
And I couldn’t help joining him as we watched the endless sky lose its color and the stars blink into life.
It really was perfect, even if it only lasted for today.
“Whatcha thinking about?” Ryder asked softly, tilting his head forward to kiss my forearms. “You’ve been quiet.”
“Nothin’,” I replied automatically. “Well, not nothing. Just about how much I don’t want today to end, I guess.”
“Yeah. Same here.” He paused before leaning back once more. “There’s really no way we can get you transferred to the Nelson Ranch?”
I shook my head. “From what Larry tells me, nobody else in the area is cleared to work with parolees. I’ll have to finish my six months with your dad.”
“I wish you didn’t…” Ryder sighed, pulling my arms tight around him. Then, in a softer voice, he said, “You know… he was nicer to parolees once. There was a moment where I thought he actually wanted to help people instead of just get cheap labor.”
“Yeah? When was that?”
“A little over three years ago,” Ryder nodded. “The summer after my sophomore year of college.”
I leaned down, resting my head on his shoulder. “What happened?”
“There was this young kid that came to us on parole,” Ryder said, his voice soft with memory.
“Jeremy. Barely twenty-one, got caught with some weed and a little meth. First-time offense, but the judge made an example of him. Dad took him in as part of the program, and I don’t know.
.. something about that kid got to him.”
I listened silently, my chin resting on Ryder’s shoulder as the fireflies danced around us.
“Jeremy was smart. Had a scholarship to Montana State before he screwed up. Dad started teaching him about ranch management, even let him sit in on business meetings.” Ryder’s fingers traced patterns on my forearm. “For a while, I thought Dad had found the son he actually wanted.”
“What happened to him?” I asked, sensing the story didn’t have a happy ending.
Ryder tensed slightly in my arms. “One morning, Dad found him in the office. He’d broken into the safe, taken about ten grand in cash.
My father might’ve forgiven that though.
” Ryder shook his head. “But Jeremy was terrified when one of the ranch hands tried to stop him. He stabbed him in the shoulder before stealing one of the horses and riding out into the wilderness. They picked him up three days later on the side of the highway with a broken arm. The horse threw him and he had to walk for two days to find a road. He still had the cash in his pocket.”
“Shit,” I breathed.
“Yeah. Dad was... different after that. Started treating all the parolees like they were just waiting for a chance to steal from him or hurt somebody again. The program became less about rehabilitation and more about cheap labor.” He shook his head.
“I tried to tell him one bad apple didn’t mean everyone was rotten, but he wouldn’t listen. Not after that.”
I tightened my arms around him, pulling him closer against my chest. “People get hurt, they build walls. It’s easier than risking getting hurt again.”
“Is that what you did?” Ryder asked, turning his head slightly to look at me. “After Cody betrayed you?”
The question caught me off guard. “Yeah,” I admitted after a moment. “I guess I did.”
“But you let me in,” he said softly. “Eventually.”
I smiled against his neck. “You’re pretty persistent when you want something.”
“True,” he laughed, the sound vibrating through his back into my chest. “But you could’ve kept pushing me away. You didn’t.”
I thought about that for a moment, about all the walls I’d built during those seven years in prison. Walls that had kept me safe, kept me sane. Walls that Ryder had somehow managed to scale without me even realizing it until he was already inside.
“Maybe I was tired of being alone,” I said finally. “Or maybe you’re just special.”
He leaned his head back against my shoulder, a contented sigh escaping his lips. “I like that second option better.”
We fell into comfortable silence again, watching as more stars appeared overhead. The night air was cooling rapidly, but beneath our shared blanket, we were warm against each other’s skin.
“I have something for you,” Ryder said suddenly, pulling away slightly.
“Oh yeah?” I raised an eyebrow as he stood, keeping the blanket wrapped around his shoulders as he padded back toward the cabin. I watched the sway of his hips beneath the blanket, appreciating the view as he disappeared inside. He returned moments later, clutching something small in his palm.
“Close your eyes,” he instructed, kneeling in front of me.
I did as I was told, feeling a flutter of anticipation in my chest. His warm hand took mine, and I felt something cool and metallic being pressed into my palm.
“Okay, you can look now.”
I opened my eyes and glanced down. In my hand was a simple key on a leather cord.
“What’s this?” I asked, turning the key over in my fingers.
“It’s the key to this cabin,” Ryder said, his voice soft but steady. “Cole and Jesse said we could use it whenever we want. I figured... well, once your parole is up, we might need somewhere that’s just ours. Somewhere my father can’t touch.”
I stared at the key, emotion welling up in my throat. It wasn’t just a key to a cabin… it was a promise of a future. A future where we could be together without fear or secrecy. A future I never thought would be possible…
“Ryder, I—”
“You don’t have to say anything,” he interrupted, his eyes shining in the moonlight.
“I know it’s a lot. And I know four months is still a long way off.
But I wanted you to have it. To know that.
.. that I’m serious about this. About us.
Even if you decide you want to go somewhere else, to get away from Hell Creek forever, this is a promise that I’ll go. If you’ll have me.”
I closed my fist around the key, feeling its weight. It was so light and yet so significant. “Thank you,” I managed, my voice rougher than I intended.
Ryder smiled, leaning forward to kiss me softly. “Besides, four months isn’t so long when you think about it,” he murmured against my lips. “And then we’ll have all the time in the world.”
I pulled him into my arms, the blanket falling around us as I held him close. The night air was cool against our skin, but I barely noticed. All I could focus on was Ryder—his warmth, his scent, the steady beat of his heart against mine.
“You know,” I said after a moment, “a lot can change in four months.”
Ryder tensed slightly in my arms. “What do you mean?”
“I mean your dad might calm down. The ranch might settle. You might find a permanent position at Nelson’s.” I ran my fingers through his hair, enjoying the silky feel of it. “Things might get easier.”
He relaxed, nuzzling against my neck. “Maybe. But even if they don’t, we’ll figure it out. Together.”
Together. The word echoed in my mind, filling spaces that had been empty for so long. For someone who’d spent most of his life alone, the concept of “together” was both terrifying and exhilarating.
“We should probably head back soon,” Ryder sighed reluctantly. “Larry said he’d cover you for curfew, but I don’t want you to get into trouble after everything with Sam.”
“Yeah,” I nodded, still not wanting to let him go. “You’re right.”
I reluctantly untangled myself from Ryder. The key hung heavy around my neck, its weight both comforting and terrifying. I couldn’t believe what he’d offered me, a man he’d only known for two months.
“You know,” I said, gathering the blanket around my waist, “I haven’t had a day like this in... well, maybe ever.”
Ryder smiled up at me, his face illuminated by moonlight, making him look almost ethereal. “Me neither. Not even close.”
We dressed slowly, stealing glances and touches, neither of us wanting to break the spell of the day. Each piece of clothing felt like a barrier being rebuilt between us and the world we’d managed to escape for a few precious hours.
“I’ll drive you back to the ranch,” Ryder said as he pulled his shirt over his head. “It’s too dark for you to walk through those pastures alone.”
I nodded, fingering the key that now hung around my neck. I tucked it beneath my shirt, feeling it press against my skin. Our secret. Our promise.
The drive back was quiet, both of us lost in our thoughts. I kept my hand on Ryder’s thigh, unwilling to break contact until absolutely necessary. The truck’s headlights cut through the darkness, illuminating the narrow dirt road as we wound our way back toward McGrath Ranch.
“I’ll try to get a message to you this week,” Ryder said as we approached the end of the driveway. “Maybe through Larry or Evelyn.”
“Be careful,” I warned, squeezing his thigh. “Your father’s watching everyone closely now. I don’t want you getting caught in his crosshairs again.”
He pulled the truck to a stop about twenty feet from the end of the driveway.
The night was dark enough that we probably couldn’t be seen from the main house, but I still felt exposed and vulnerable.
The weight of reality was settling back on my shoulders with every passing second.
I wasn’t looking forward to tomorrow without Ryder.
“Kiss me,” I said suddenly, turning to face him. “One more time before I go back to pretending I don’t know you.”
Ryder leaned across the console without hesitation, his lips finding mine in the darkness. I cupped his face in my hands, trying to memorize the feel of him, the taste, the small sound he made in the back of his throat when I deepened the kiss.
When we finally broke apart, I rested my forehead against his, our breaths mingling in the space between us. “Four months,” I whispered, more to myself than to him.
“Four months,” he echoed, his fingers tracing the outline of the key beneath my shirt. “And then whatever we want.”
I kissed him once more, quick and hard, before forcing myself to pull away. “I have to go, pup.”
He nodded, his eyes shining in the dim light of the dashboard. “Be safe.”
I slipped out of the truck, shutting the door silently behind me. With a wave I watched Ryder make a U-turn back the way he came. I stood there for a long moment until the taillights disappeared over the next hill leaving me alone in the darkness.
The walk back to the bunkhouse felt longer than usual, my mind lingering on the cabin, on Ryder’s body against mine, on the key that now hung around my neck.
Each step took me further from him and closer to the reality I’d managed to escape for a precious day.
The weight of the key against my chest was both comfort and burden.
It was a promise of something I wasn’t sure I deserved but desperately wanted.
And now that I had something to look forward to, I was more terrified than ever that I might lose it.
As I approached, I kept to the shadows, careful to avoid the main house.
The last thing I needed was Pete catching me returning from a day with his son.
I’d nearly made it to the bunkhouse when I noticed something that made my blood run cold.
There was a red glow in the darkness, the unmistakable ember of a cigarette burning on the porch of the main house.
Someone was watching.
I forced myself to maintain my pace, not too fast, not too slow.
Just a man returning from his day off, nothing suspicious.
But my heart hammered against my ribs, the key suddenly feeling like it might burn through my shirt with its presence.
I couldn’t make out who sat in the darkness, just the silhouette of a figure and that burning red dot tracking my movement across the yard.
Was it Pete? Larry? Some other ranch hand? Whoever it was, they weren’t making any move to call out or approach me, which somehow made it worse. I felt exposed, like a deer in a hunter’s sights, waiting for the shot.
I reached for the bunkhouse door, my hand trembling slightly despite my efforts to appear casual. The cigarette flared brighter as its owner took a deep drag, illuminating the face just enough for me to catch a glimpse.
Pete.
Our eyes met across the yard, his narrowed with suspicion or anger. I couldn’t tell which. But I knew with absolute certainty that he’d been waiting. For me. There was only one question left unanswered.
How much did he know?
I nodded slightly, an acknowledgment that could have been mistaken for respect if you didn’t look too closely. Then I slipped into the bunkhouse, shutting the door firmly behind me. I leaned against it, heart racing, as the reality of our situation came crashing back.
Ryder had been right to worry. His father was watching, more closely than we’d realized. And something told me this was just the beginning.