Chapter 4
TRISH
With Rose’s needs met, my anxiety eases a little. My baby girl is fed and changed, and we have shelter and a safe place to stay. It’s more than we’ve had since she was born four months ago.
I’ve only known Joseph for a few short hours, but I’m starting to relax around him. A man who helps a woman and baby in need can’t be all bad.
I wish I could get hold of Hailey, but hers and Kobe’s phones are still out of range of any signal. With Rose fed, I realize how woefully unprepared I am. There’s nowhere for her to sleep.
Joseph offers up his bed, which is so kind of him that I almost cry. But I turn away quickly and help him roll up towels to form a barrier for Rose. It’s not ideal and I probably won’t sleep a wink, but it will have to do until I can figure out my next move.
Joseph leaves me alone to get Rose down to sleep, and I lie on the bed with her and hold her close.
The bed smells masculine, like pine and oil, and a new sensation weaves itself into my veins.
What would it be like to lie in here with Joseph, to have his muscular arms wrapped around me, to feel his body pressed against mine?
I shake the thought out of my head. There’s no point having indecent thoughts about my rescuer. He’s just a kind man doing the decent thing.
Rose makes a contented gurgling sound, and I kiss the top of her downy head.
“I’m sorry this was a bad day, baby girl.” My hand rubs circles on her back as she snuggles into my chest. “But I hope it will be worth it.”
There’s a knot in my stomach that has been there since this morning, but as I press Rose’s tiny body close and breathe in her milky scent, the knot eases a little.
My daughter is safe, and that’s all that matters. Hailey will be home soon, and then I’ll figure something out for us.
Hailey always told me I could come to her anytime. That’s what sisters are for. She tried to get me to leave Ian sooner, but I stupidly thought things would get better once we had the baby. They didn’t. They got worse.
Rose’s breathing turns heavy, and I watch her sleep for a few minutes before placing her carefully between the towels and tiptoeing out of the bedroom.
The scent of frying garlic and rosemary hits me, and my stomach gives a lurching rumble. I cross my arms over it, horrified that Joseph heard. But he doesn’t say anything.
“I’ve made stew.”
He indicates for me to sit at the small kitchen table, and I slump into the seat. With Rose asleep, the adrenaline I’ve been running on all day leaves my body and I’m suddenly exhausted.
Joseph puts a large bowl of stew in front of me, and I attack it hungrily.
“Thank you,” I say between mouthfuls.
I don’t know what the meat is, but it’s rich and lean, and with all the flavors he’s included it’s the best meal I’ve ever had.
“I’ll pay you back for all this.” Although I’m not sure how.
He shakes his head. “No you won’t.”
I choke on my mouthful, wondering if he can tell I don’t have a dime to my name.
“You and the little one can stay as long as you need. Don’t worry about money or any kind of payback.”
He says it in a tone as if it’s all decided. Like taking a stranger and her baby in are normal things to do. And maybe they are if you’re a good person.
Suddenly, there’s a sting of tears behind my eyes. The one person who was supposed to love me treated me like shit, yet this stranger has taken me and my child in, fed us, and given us shelter. I didn’t know there was still this level of kindness in the world.
“Hell, don’t cry.”
Joseph reaches across the table and lays his meaty hand over mine. The warmth from him makes me sob harder.
“Sorry,” I say between tears. “You’ve been so kind.”
With his warm hand on mine, the first kind touch I’ve had in months, the flood gates open and I can’t stop them. Everything I’ve been holding back for the last few months bubbles up inside me.
Joseph doesn’t ask questions, which is good because I’m not ready to tell my story. Instead, he comes around to my side of the table and crouches next to my chair. His strong arms fold around me and he holds me silently as I cry, snot running into his checkered shirt.
We stay like that for a long time until my sobs dry up. I feel utterly drained when I sit back on my chair. But the knot in my stomach has lessened, and my chest feels less tight. For the first time today, I feel like I did the right thing.
Joseph trains his sparkling blue eyes on me. They’re full of concern and warmth and a flash of something else. I recognize it as desire before he sits back on his haunches and looks down.
My body tingles. I’m red-eyed and puffy and covered in snot, but one look from this man has my core clenching and heat coursing through my veins.
It’s been a long time since someone held me and a long time since a man looked at me with desire, no matter how fleeting. I need to get a grip.
“Thank you, Joseph. I mean it. We had nowhere else to go today.”
He lifts his hand, and I think he’s going to touch my face, but instead he does this awkward pat on my head.
“I’ll look after you, Trish. You and the baby. You have nothing to worry about again.”
His words are confusing. The tone sounds final, like he’ll always look after me and Rose, but that’s ridiculous. He must just mean while we’re here.
He stands back on his feet and clears the bowls away.
I try to help with the washing up, but Joseph won’t let me. Instead, he runs a bath for me and insists I bathe and get to sleep. I don’t fight it; the day has left me exhausted, and I can barely keep my eyes open.
“I’ll sleep in the pickup so you have nothing to worry about,” he says.
I shake my head. “You don’t need to do that. It’s bad enough that we’ve taken your bed. At least sleep on the couch.”
I barely know him, but I feel I can trust Joseph. More than that, as I soak in his giant bathtub, my thoughts go to the feel of his arms around me, how he smelled like pine and rosemary, the way my heartbeat quickened when he hugged me, and those sparkling blue intense eyes.
I shake the thoughts out of my head. He’s the first man who’s been kind. That’s all it is. He’d do the same for anyone, and if there’s one lesson I should have learned by now, it’s not to get carried away when a man shows you kindness. It doesn’t last.
But he’s different.
My heart whispers things to me that I’m not ready to hear.
I drain the bath and snuggle next to Rose. She seems safe enough in her makeshift towel crib, and I’m soon fast asleep.