Chapter 22
Jordan
“I don’t know if I can,” she says when I call her. “My mom asked me to help her around the house. She’s been sick and now Charlie is sick, so they kind of need me here.”
“Oh.” Disappointment floods me. But if the family is sick, what can she do? “Well, how about after work?”
She hesitates but then says, “Yes. How about I come over after work? I can’t sleep over tonight, I need to help with Charlie in the morning, but we can spend a few hours together.”
“Okay. Maybe I’ll surprise you with dinner again.”
“I’d like that.”
Instead, when I bring her dinner it turns out that she’s closing by herself so I just hang out at the store with her until it’s time for her to close. She looks tired and I mention it once we’re hanging out in my room.
“Between my mom and Charlie being sick, I haven’t been getting enough sleep,” she admits. “And I’ve been trying to help around the house a little more.”
“Why isn’t Ivy doing that?” I ask carefully.
She rolls her eyes. “Ivy seems to get a pass on all things because she’s a single mom. Dad initially was mad that she was going to real estate school but now he’s been asking her how it’s going, how long until she can take the test. All of it. It’s frustrating.”
“And you’re picking up the slack.” I gently nudge her. “Turn over. I’m going to give you a massage.”
“What?” She glances at me in confusion, like she doesn’t understand.
“Turn. Over. And take off your top.”
She pulls her T-shirt over her head and then flops onto her stomach.
God, I love her body. Her skin. How it feels to touch her.
And even though I’m probably going to be hard as granite by the time I’m done, this isn’t about sex.
It doesn’t seem like anyone in her life takes care of her, and if I can be the one person that does, I hope it shows her just how much I care.
It hasn’t been long but the feelings between us are growing exponentially.
In some ways, this was inevitable. Now that it’s happening, I don’t want to screw it up.
And I want to make sure she understands how important she is to me.
We were all about the love and romance the first time around, but I don’t know that my actions reflected my words. This time, I’m trying to do better.
I stare at her for a few seconds and then reach out to unhook her bra.
I don’t take it off, just let it move to the side so I can press my fingers into her back.
I start gently, running my hands over her skin, watching with satisfaction as goosebumps break out all over her flesh.
Using the heel of my palm, I drag it down the bumps of her spine, listening to a few pops that make her sigh.
“Oh, that feels amazing,” she whispers.
“Just relax,” I say.
I use my thumbs to dig into the area inside her shoulder blades, up to the back of her neck, and then across the curve of her shoulders.
I knead and squeeze her tight muscles, occasionally digging my knuckles into knots, but keeping my touch light so it’s not painful.
She needs to rest more than she needs loose muscles.
Her breathing evens out and after about ten minutes, I realize she’s fast asleep.
She must be exhausted, and I don’t want to wake her. I can let her sleep for an hour or two and then wake her up.
I shift so I’m on my back, propped against some pillows, and then I pull her against my chest. She stirs for a moment, blinking up at me sleepily, and I smile.
“Rest. I’ll wake you up in an hour or two.”
“Mmkay.” She goes back to sleep and I sit there stroking her hair.
This could be our life if we were together.
Going to sleep together. Waking up together. Being together.
No sneaking around, no lies, just a normal couple.
The only question is whether or not we’re ready for this. It feels like we should be. We were together about eight months the first time, and it’s been just over a month now. All told, less than a year. That’s the reason I haven’t pushed it even though it’s what I want.
I don’t think Jude and Chloe would mind if she moved in until the end of the season, and then once we get to summer, she and I would get serious about buying a house of our own.
I’d hoped to save up for another year but I have a nice nest egg already.
If I need to take on a small mortgage, that won’t be a problem.
My only reservation is that Victoria seems to be holding back. I know she worries about how her parents are going to react, and I’m not sure how to fix that. I can ask to meet with her dad, talk to him about how I feel about her, but she said it’s too soon.
So now we’re in limbo.
I don’t want to rush her, but it feels like I’ve waited four years for us to find our way back to each other. What’s the point of taking things this slowly? Wouldn’t it be better to spend as much time together as possible?
Maybe I’m just impatient.
Especially since I’m gone so much with the team.
But it’s almost April, and the regular season will be over in two weeks. Once the playoffs start I’m going to have even less time with her, so I’d like us to be on solid ground before we get to that point.
I must have dozed off because the next time I open my eyes it’s starting to get light out.
Shit!
I grab my phone in alarm.
6:01.
And Victoria is still asleep in my arms.
“Babe. Honey, time to get up.”
Her eyes flutter, and then she must realize that it’s morning because she sits up in alarm.
“Oh, shit. What time is it?”
“A couple minutes after six. I’m sorry. I fell asleep.”
“Dammit, Jordan.” She adjusts her bra, grabs her shirt and then yanks it over her head.
“I’m sorry, babe. I didn’t think I was that tired. The light is still on…” It sounds lame and I feel like I let her down but she’s already up and putting on her shoes.
“I have to go,” she whispers. “I’ll see you later.”
“Hey.” I get up and reach for her. “I’m sorry. Really.”
“I know. It’s okay. But I need to help with Charlie. I have to go.” She quickly presses her lips to mine and before I can say or do anything else, she’s gone.
This is one of many things I dislike about the current state of our relationship.
She’s an adult. There’s no reason why she can’t sleep over but I guess her parents don’t see it that way. Or she’s still too afraid of them to push back. What can they do? Kick her out? She could live here with me and—
I’ve never told her that.
She’s been so adamant about taking things slowly I’ve been reluctant to say things that might make it feel like I’m pushing her. Now I’m not sure what to do. If I tell her that I’m as in love with her now as I ever was, and want her to move in with me, will that scare her off?
Is she as ready as I am?
I guess I should ask her.
Make my feelings clear.
And let her know that I’m in this for the long haul, even if she needs more time to get comfortable with the idea. My gut tells me the first step is winning over her parents, so the goal is to do whatever it takes.
Failure simply isn’t an option.