Chapter Twenty-seven
Daisy-Mae
I pull the last loaves of banana bread from the oven and set them on the stove to cool.
Every surface of Mama’s kitchen is covered in baked goods for the Buttermilk.
Not having my porch pickup means I’m not making any money, so I have plans to travel to a few of the neighboring farming communities to see if their cafes and restaurants will stock what Zadie won’t.
If only I’d ignored Eddie’s demands and had put my grammy’s inheritance into that fancy pastry school in Dallas, instead of letting my lousy husband convince me that my dreams didn’t matter, maybe I’d have my own bakery by now.
Waylon had been sleeping soundly in his crib. I’d fed and changed him, and Lemon and Mamma had taken over watching him so I could continue baking until my feet hurt.
“He went down easy this time,” Mama says, as she enters the kitchen and eyes the treat-laden countertops. “Oh my. I think it’s time for a break.”
“Oh, I should probably keep going. Do as much as I can while he sleeps.”
Mama grabs two mugs from the wooden tree on the counter and fills them with coffee and cream. She adds an extra helping of sugar to one and hands it to me. “Girl, there aren’t enough people in Red River Canyon to eat all of this. Though my brood would certainly give it the old college try.”
I sigh and sip from my mug. “Maybe just for a minute.”
Mama leads me into the sunroom. Dappled light filters in through the large windows making the pale-yellow walls that much cheerier.
The windows overlook the stable, and though I can’t see West or any of the other boys, it’s a lovely view.
I never realized ranch life was so beautiful.
I mean, I’m sure there’s plenty of grit and grime to get into, but it’s peaceful here in a way I’ve never felt. I could be happy here.
Idiot. This is not for you. You’re unwanted.
You’re the girl people leave. You can’t have a family.
That old devil rears her ugly head again and for once, I shoo the errant thoughts away and decide I do deserve love and happiness, and I have a family.
Whatever happens with West or the rest of the Winchesters, I have my son, and I’ll never let him down the way my mama did with me.
I sip my coffee, my body still thrumming with the need to get up, to work, but I close my eyes and take a deep breath, inhaling all that beautiful country air.
“Ranch life suits you,” Mama says.
“I like it here.” I smile at mama, and then my smile grows even wider when movement catches my eye, and a group of cowboys come riding through the gate toward the stable.
“Have you told him you’re in love with him?”
I turn to her, my smile vanishing. I debate refuting her statement, but a part of me doesn’t want to. A part of me is tired of running from my feelings and playing it safe. “That obvious?”
“I won’t pretend to know what goes on in my son’s head—or his love life—but I’ve never seen that man look at another woman the way he looks at you. And I never saw you look at your husband that way.”
“I loved my husband,” I say, somewhat coldly. I would have put up with the dumb son of a bitch forever if he hadn’t left me first. “I was loyal. I kept my vows. Eddie was the one who left us.”
“I know, sweet girl, but you didn’t look at him the way you look at my son. Do you believe in soul mates, Daisy?”
“I don’t know what I believe any more.”
“Well, I do. I always have, and I know soul mates when I see them.” She smiles sadly. “But more importantly, what do you see when you look at my son?”
“I see my future. I see generations of Winchesters to come. I see the three of us happy here and more babies on the damn way, but I don’t want him to wake up one day and feel like he’s been saddled with a wife and kid he never wanted.
I know he never saw us in his plans, and Waylon and I are kind of a package deal. ”
“Oh, honey, one thing I know about my son, is he won’t ever do anything he don’t want to.
They keep me in the dark about a lot of things on this ranch, why you needed to move out of your beautiful home in town, for instance,” she says with a reproachful look, “But one thing I’m never wrong on, is who’s forever, and who’s not.
When I say you’re family, it’s not because you work for us, it’s because I know better than anyone what future daughter-in-law material looks like.
I’ve just been waiting for my son to figure it out too. ”
“Everything is just so ... uncertain.” I bury my face in my hands to cover my tears. “I don’t think I could handle the rejection if he decides he doesn’t want me.”
“Only an idiot would turn you down, Daisy. And I didn’t raise no fools.” Mama sets her mug on the coffee table and takes my hand. “Regardless of whether or not he does figure it out, you and Waylon will always have a place at my table. Winchesters don’t leave family.”
At those words, something inside my chest breaks free, some old hurt, rejection, disappointment, all of it just melts away, because they are family, no matter how much my inner antagonist protests. West is family, and I finally feel as if I’ve found home after a lifetime of searching.